by Reana Malori
Sixteen Years Ago
Sitting beside her on the couch in their family room, he held her hand in his as she shared her soul. Not knowing if she’d be accepted or ostracized by those who’d given her life. The one thing he knew for certain, is that she had him. Her brother. That bond was unshakeable. If he had to take over her care because his parents didn’t accept who she was, he was prepared to do so. Not that he had such little faith in their parents, but stranger things had happened. He and April were ready for the worst.
At nineteen, he had no idea how he’d manage to take care of her if things didn’t go over so well, but he was willing to do whatever it took. Luckily, it wasn’t necessary. When she’d finished telling them, their parents looked at each other and smiled. Their father shook his head while wearing a huge grin, and their mother started giggling. Looking over at April, he shrugged his shoulders. Jordan was just as confused as April was.
“Honey, did you think we didn’t know that already? We’ve suspected for years. Honestly, we were waiting for you to get to the point where you were comfortable telling us. We don’t care who you love.” His mother passed her gaze from April to Jordan. “That goes for both of you. Never let the world try to dictate who you should love. What’s right for your life doesn’t have to be right for anyone else.” Turning her gaze back to April, she grabbed their father’s hand. “Honey don’t ever worry about what your dad and I think about your love life. As long as whomever you’re with doesn’t break your heart, we’re fine.”
April leaped out of her seat and rushed over to their mother in a split-second. Their mother’s arms were wrapped around his sister. Their father’s arms were wrapped around their mother.
“Well, shit,” he said in a low voice. “That went easier than I thought.” Making a note of their mother’s words that were directed at him, he smiled. She’d caught on to his preferences. Good. That meant it wouldn’t be an issue when he brought his latest girlfriend over for dinner. Allowing them this moment, he was about to leave the room when his mom called out, “Just where do you think you’re going, young man? I know you think you’re too big for hugs and such silly nonsense, but I’m declaring this a family hug moment. Get your butt over here.”
That was one of many times when his parents had surprised him, while also solidifying everything he thought about them, all in one moment. “Well, I got issues. It’s Leticia.”
“Oh yeah? Did she finally realize you’re never gonna get off your ass and make an honest woman out of her? If I were her, I would have left your ass by the side of the road a long time ago.” Although said in jest, her words hit a bit too close to home. He was silent for a few seconds longer than he should have. “Jordan?” His sister’s tone became serious. “You still there?” After another few seconds of silence, she sighed. “Fuck,” she hissed. “Okay, spill it, Jordan. What did you do?”
“Why do you assume I did something? Maybe it’s her? Did it ever occur to you that she’s the one playing me? Holding me by a string?” While his voice had risen when talking to his sister, he knew his anger wasn’t really directed at April. It pissed him off that they always came at him when some shit went down with Leticia. And over the past two-plus years, they’d gotten to know her. His family knew better. If shit was fucked up, it was because of something he did. Or in this case, something he didn’t do.
They’d never think it was something she did because they know him. Better than anyone else. His faults had been on display his entire life. Usually, when things went south with a woman, it was because of his actions. When they got too clingy, he’d pull away and make up a reason he could no longer see them. If he was forced to bring them in contact with his family and they became a little too familiar, he’d just stop calling. Sex was a means to an end. He lived life to the fullest without regret. If that meant going through women like they were socks, then that’s what would happen. When he found the right one, he’d know it.
Just so happens, he met her two years ago while sitting in a coffee shop. Shitty thing was, she didn’t know it.
“Cut the bullshit woe is me. I know you, Jordan. Wait, hold on.” She pulled the phone away, and he heard her ask Gabby for a few minutes while she cussed out her stupid brother. “Okay, I’m back. Yeah, we’re not even going to entertain the idea that she’s done something to you. I know she hasn’t. So, I ask again. What did you do to Leticia? I’ll wait.”
Laughing to himself, he questioned why he called his sister. As soon as the thought passed through his mind, he took it back. There was a reason he called her. Just as he was her protector, she was his. Didn’t matter that she was five feet nothing and weighed one-hundred pounds soaking wet. If he needed a punch in the jaw, she was the first one standing in line. When someone else needed a punch on his behalf, she was the first one to volunteer. And when he’d brought Leticia over for a cookout at the family summer house shortly after they’d met, she was the first one to come up to him. He’d never forget her words that day.
Two Years Ago
“Bro-ham, I don’t know where you found her, but she’s the one. I know both of you swear you’re only friends.” Holding up her hand to him when he was about to interrupt, she continued, “I see something in her that pulls you in. You haven’t left her side for more than five minutes. You hover when she’s more than twenty feet away from your side. Every time she laughs, you smile. I doubt you even know why she’s laughing, but you smile every fucking time. Whatever you need to do to keep her, do it. Give her time. Let her call the shots. And if that doesn’t work, do what you do best and overwhelm her until she can’t say no. Now, excuse me while I go tell mom to start planning the wedding.”
Shaking his head at her parting words, Jordan looked across the yard at Leticia. In a light blue button-up dress, her shoulders bare, and sandalwood brown sandals on her feet, she was beautiful. The dress fit over her curves, highlighting that she was all woman. Hips canted to the side, her hands crossed in front of her, her teeth bit into her bottom lip, working the flesh in that way she did. Her natural hair was pulled up in a high ponytail that gave her a look of innocence and sophistication all at once. Her laughter met his ears, and a smile caused his lips to turn up. Jordan had no idea his parents were watching him as he watched Leticia. His mom smiled, her hand over her heart. His father took a sip of his scotch, secretly pleased with his son’s choice as well.
At that moment, the man said something to another person standing in their group, taking his attention from Leticia. Her eyes turned in his direction, and he saw her take a deep breath. One hand flew up to her neck as they stared at each other across the length of the yard. They stood that way for a few seconds when the spell was broken by someone touching Leticia’s arm. The man she’d been talking to was one of the neighbor’s sons. His name was Eric St. John or something. The smug bastard was a little too smooth for Jordan’s tastes, always relying on his parent’s money to get him through life. Ever since they’d met in high school, Jordan hadn’t liked that fucker. To see his hand rubbing along Leticia’s skin as if he had every right to touch her, pissed him off to no end.
A surge of jealousy went through him as he placed his drink down on the table next to him. Then he got pissed. Leticia looked over to Jordan as he moved in her direction. She must have noticed the look on his face because she stepped away from Eric, attempting to put some space between them. Only to have him take a step closer to her, touching her again. His hand wrapped around her wrist, pulling her back to him. Jordan stormed over to the small group of people, his face a mask of rage. No one touched Leticia without her permission. And they sure as shit didn’t do it around him.
“Take your hand off her before I break your fucking fingers,” Jordan said as he made it to the group. Moving his body so that he stood in front of Leticia, it forced Eric to let her go as he took a step back. Loud gasps sounded in the air as those around him heard what he said.
“Whoa, dude. I was just trying to get to know her better.”
/> “Don’t,” he growled.
Hands up in the universal sign of surrender, Eric backed up. Wary eyes looked at Jordan, and a sly smile came over the man’s face. Turning his head to look at Leticia, Eric gave her a look of attrition. “If I offended you, I apologize. I thought you were single.” Glancing at Jordan, he tilted his head, acknowledging Jordan’s unspoken claim.
“I am single,” Leticia said at the same time he growled, “She’s with me. That’s all you need to know.” He could feel her shocked gaze on him, but he wasn’t going to stop and explain shit right now. Of course, they weren’t a couple, they both knew that. Didn’t matter. She was here today, with him, at his parent’s home. No other man was going to put his hands on her around him. Turning to her, he looked down into her eyes, “You good?”
“Yes, of course. But why did you…”
Interrupting her, he didn’t want to answer the question he knew she was about to ask. “I just didn’t want him pushing up on you like that. Don’t look into it too much.” He tried to play down the situation but knew that something had shifted between them. His feelings for Leticia had changed, and he wasn’t sure what to do about the situation.
“Okay…if you say so.” Looking away for a second, she turned back to him. Those sparkling brown eyes of hers trained on his face. “Are we okay? You had a look on your face earlier before you came over. Like you were upset at me or something.”
He took a deep breath, exhaling slowly as he tried to calm down. If he could have gotten away with it and not ruined his family’s party, he would have ripped Eric’s hand off and shoved it down his throat. “No, I’m good. Just…Just stay close to me for the rest of the day.” His tone left no room for argument or misunderstanding.
“Okay, sure.”
If he could get her to respond to him like this with everything, he’d be a happy man. This entire situation was his own fault. When he’d first met her, he’d been thinking only about sinking balls deep in her, fucking her until both lost their minds. Then fucking her some more, using her body until he got his fill of the curvy goddess who’d captured his attention that day on the street. But as he talked to her that day in the coffee shop, his thoughts had changed. He didn’t want to just pump and dump. There was something else about her that drew him in. It had been different than what he was used to, and he’d wanted to explore it. Now, things had changed again, and he wasn’t sure how to deal with it. Looking down at the woman standing next to him, his stomach twisted in knots. Is this what falling in love felt like? Oh, fuck!
“I think I messed up April. Tried something different with Leticia, and time…well, I’m running out of time. I’ve done it the slow way for too long. It’s given her the wrong idea. I need to change things up because I’m not losing her. She’s mine, whether she knows it or not.” As soon as the words were out of his mouth, he knew exactly what he had to do. He thought about the list he’d committed to memory and a plan formed in his head. “Piglet, Leticia doesn’t know it yet, but I’m about to overwhelm the shit out of that woman. Let me tell you what I have planned because I may need your help. So, I’m at Leticia’s condo tonight and came across this list of three wishes…”
CHAPTER FOUR
December 12th
A WEEK LATER, LETICIA WAS WONDERING what the hell was going on with Jordan. True to his word, he’d been there to pick her up after her shift last week. She hadn’t wanted to call him. For one, it was after midnight. And two, something was going on with the two of them that made her feel as if their relationship was changing. That it wouldn’t ever be the same again.
Part of this was her fault. Well, and that stupid list. Why’d she write that thing anyway? Oh, right, she’d been binging on romance movies one night, feeling sorry for herself. Wondering if she’d made the right decisions in life, both career and love. She’d quickly concluded that her job was precisely what she wanted. She loved working in the hospital each day, helping those who needed her the most. No one could change her mind, even though many had tried.
Not her brother, who was off serving his country and doing only God knew what in the Marines. Nor her mom, who’d wanted her to do something else that wasn’t so stressful. Something that didn’t fill her days and nights with sadness, death, and seeing the worst of people. Closing her eyes as she fought the images of last weekend. If she were a weaker person, last weekend would have broken her. It had been a tough night with too many fatalities. The family wails from being notified of their loved ones passing tore through her. It never got easier.
Jordan had come inside to pick her up, which he always did. As soon as he saw her face, he opened his arms. Something else he always did. They’d been friends long enough for him to know it had been a difficult night. As she felt his arms wrap around her, his strong embrace pulling her in close, she exhaled. Sinking into his body, she allowed all the images of the night to slowly fade away.
“It’s okay, babe. Just hold on to me. I got you.”
His words were exactly what she needed. This is where she belonged. With Jordan. In his arms. Why he didn’t see that, she’d never know. Early on in their relationship, she thought there was something in his eyes when he looked at her. An intensity that made her body tingle and her core moisten. Then the look in his eyes would change, and she’d question what she saw. After a while, it was easier to believe that her eyes had been playing tricks on her. Jordan just wasn’t interested in her like that.
They were friends. He loved her like a sister. Took care of her when she needed him to, because that’s what friends did. It didn’t mean any more than that. Only a fool would continue to wait for a man to notice her when he’d made it clear he had no interest. At least not that way. But then he’d do something so damn sweet, it would make her forget the stern talking to she’d given herself.
Like, for example, hold her in his arms for more than fifteen minutes in the middle of a busy hospital. Lending her his strength as he whispered soothing words. No one tried to interrupt them or move them to another location. Which meant her co-workers recognized that she needed this time, that she was at her breaking point, and Jordan was the only thing keeping her sane. Or, it meant Jordan’s eyes were shooting daggers at anyone who even attempted to look their way or make an approach. Now that she thought about, it was more than likely Jordan’s facial expression promising pain and death to anyone who interrupted them. Laughing to herself, she took another sip of her wine.
That man was so confusing. She never knew what to expect from him. Once they finally made it to her house that night, her eyes had teared up as she took in the Christmas tree he’d decorated while she was out. She knew he didn’t want anyone to know how much he enjoyed doing this for her. It wasn’t his style. After that first time when she’d practically strong-armed him into helping her do the tree, he’d groused and fussed at her the entire time. Told her he had a reputation to maintain and if she ever told anyone, he’d deny it. Oh, she’d laughed about that for a good month. Although, in the end, she never told anyone. This was their secret, of which they had plenty. The tree he’d done for her this time around was probably the best one yet. Looking over her shoulder, she whispered, “It’s beautiful, Jordan. Thank you.”
His intense blue eyes were trained on her face. The only sound in the room was their heavy breathing. For reasons unknown to her, she could never do this whole dead silence thing. Not when it came to him. She began to squirm and switch from foot to foot when he finally spoke up.
“You’re welcome. You know I’d do anything for you.”
“What—?” She began when he broke in.
“Go take your shower. I’ll get you some juice and some headache medicine. I’m sure you have a migraine coming on.”
Turning, he’d walked away from her, going toward her kitchen. Standing there for a few more seconds, she fought with her desire to tell him everything. To blurt out that she loved him. That she wanted more from him than just friendship. But she hadn’t. Instead, she walked t
o the back of her condo and got in the shower, just as Jordan told her.
Smiling at the one bright spot from that entire night, she thought of how Jordan held her in his arms all night as she slept. How did she know? Because each time she woke up to turn over or adjust her covers, he was right there. A massive arm draped over her waist as he slept behind her, his body cradling hers close to his much larger frame. His beautiful face finally relaxed as he slept in her king-sized bed. Smiling at the memory, she closed her eyes, capturing that moment in freeze frame.
If she had to give up those moments with him to find her happiness, would she be able to do it? The thought alone scared her. But no man worth his salt would be okay with Jordan remaining in her life. Unless he was a fool, and she was never going to be with a fool, he’d notice her feelings for Jordan after one look. Her friends told her she wore her emotions for him on her sleeve. He was the only one who didn’t see it.
Now, a week after that he’d slept in her bed, cradling her in his arms as they slept, she hadn’t seen him once. That never happened. Not since a few months after they’d first met. They saw each other at least every other day, something more. But to go an entire week without seeing each other? No. That wasn’t like them at all. He called or texted her every day, but it wasn’t the same. Each time she asked if he wanted to come over for dinner or if he wanted to meet for lunch, he claimed he was too busy. Some acquisition at work was taking up too much of his time.
He gave her some excuse about working too many long hours, and he just couldn’t do it. Well, she called bullshit. There’d never been any project or client that would make him go this long without seeing her. Then again, why did she even care so much? Wasn’t she ready to move on and find someone else? Someone who could give her the time, attention, and love she wanted so badly?
