by Elyse, Drew
“Thank you,” I said, dumping all of the feelings that had choked me up into it because they were the only words I could find. They seemed so pathetic, but they were all I had.
His lips didn’t move, but it felt like those dark eyes were smiling at me. “You’re welcome.”
I couldn’t stop looking at it. I’d been home for two hours, but I still found myself wanting to see it again. I’d pull up the pictures he’d taken with my phone or go stand in the mirror like I was then, marveling at it even through the layers of plastic wrap and ointment.
“You’re staring at it again, aren’t you?” Caroline asked through the phone.
“Shut up.”
She laughed.
“Seriously, though,” I diverted us back to why I’d called. “I don’t know what to do.”
“Were there any other places that seemed like actual options?”
I ran through everything in my head, again. As if I hadn’t done it a dozen times since I got home. The list never changed: creepy landlord, next to the sewage treatment plant and smelled it, crazy door girl, dumb and dumber catfishers, creepy landlord take two, sorority twins that didn’t realize college—or maybe it was even high school—was over, the studio that was no long available, listed in my budget but with a bunch of weird fees tacked on to make it well above, and saw what I was pretty sure was a drug deal happen in the hallway.
“Not really. I tried looking at listings again, but even that’s rough. Trying to move in the middle of the month isn’t ideal, either. Maybe I can just stick it out here longer. Kelly won’t mind, and Jeff can fucking suck it.”
“Or move in with the hot, super talented tattoo artist.”
“That I barely know,” I tacked on the important piece of information there.
“Very true. I could call Cassie. If that Jess is with a cop, her husband probably knows him. And you said she lived with him before. If Cassie’s husband says he’s trustworthy, and Jess and he vouch for Park…”
“That’s a pretty long thread.”
“Yes,” she granted. “But it’d be a thread pretty heavy with guys whose job it is to keep people safe.”
That was true. “I don’t think it’s worth it. He seems like a good guy who’d get the stamp of approval, but that still doesn’t make it a good idea. I still don’t really know him. We could seriously not gel and be at each other’s throats in no time.”
She made a sound of agreement, but said, “To play devil’s advocate here: you barely knew Kelly when you moved in with her. It might have been a good amount of time, but you weren’t close. You didn’t really learn anything about her until you became her roommate.”
“Well, look at how that is working out now,” I shot back.
“Fair. But you still lived there a few years without issue before the walking, talking sphincter became a problem.”
She had a point there.
“Like he said,” she went on. “It could just be temporary. If Jackass Jeff is really going to be an issue, you could move and spend a few months waiting for a gem to pop up on the market that you can grab before someone else.”
It probably shouldn’t, but the idea was starting to sound like it had merit.
“I don’t know,” I hedged still.
“I’m not saying you should take him up on the offer. I’m just talking it through. I haven’t met the guy. If you’d called and just told me you were going to do it, I would be worried sick about it. It definitely is not on obvious yes, but that doesn’t necessarily mean it should be a no. I’m not in the position to make that decision for you.”
That right there was why I called Caroline. Aside from the fact that she was my closest friend, she was always good for this type of talk. I made emotional calls a lot, Caroline was much more methodical.
“I’ll give it some thought,” I conceded. As I did, I heard keys in the front door. “I think Kelly’s coming in. I might try to have a chat with her about things.”
“Good call. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“Bye.”
I hung up, heading out into the living room ready to talk to Kelly, only to find Jeff in the doorway, dumping his shoes on the floor instead of lining them up on the mat two feet away. I was about to turn around and go hang out in my room instead when he noticed me.
“Fucking wonderful,” he groused. “You’re still here.”
“I live here.” And I actually pay to do that, I thought but bit back for Kelly’s sake.
“Pretty sure she told you to get the fuck out. But you’re taking your sweet ass time about it.”
Murder is bad. Murder is bad.
“Not all of us find someone to freeload off of and move fast as we can to do it,” I snapped.
“You know what, cunt? I ought to teach you to keep your fucking trap shut.”
Oh, no. No. He did not just call me—
“What did you just say?”
He stomped across the living room, getting close. I should have been smart, should have tried to deescalate the situation, but I was fucking fuming. I didn’t give even an inch.
“I said I ought to teach you to shut your fucking trap. You think you can look like that, run your mouth like that, and not die alone? Really? You’d be hard-pressed to find a man to put up with that fucked up face of yours, let alone the rest. It don’t matter if you cover up some of that shit with a tattoo. It’s still there. You don’t learn to shut the fuck up, that chance becomes nothing. Hot women, they can sometimes get away with a smart mouth. You? Not a man on earth would put up with all of that shit.”
I was going to rip his balls off, shove them down his throat, and when he was done—
The door opened again, Kelly striding in with a shopping bag on her arm. Her smile died when she saw Jeff and I facing off.
Her voice trembling, she said, “Hi, guys. What’s going on?”
I should tell her. Forget being the supportive friend that let it go like she’d asked me to. I should repeat it all word for word and force her to acknowledge the reality of who he was.
“Kelly,” I started, but her eyes got huge and pleading. She didn’t want me to say anything more. Whether it was from fear of his reaction, or just the knowledge that it would mean she couldn’t pretend anymore, I didn’t know.
I forced myself to say, “Never mind,” even though the words tasted like ash in my mouth.
Not giving her anything in response to the thank you she was giving in her expression, I retreated to my room again, something I was becoming all too adept at lately. I was lying in bed—on my stomach because of the tattoo—trying to figure out what the hell I was going to do now, when my phone dinged with an incoming text.
Caroline: I called Cassie. Jess’s boyfriend is her husband’s freaking partner. What kind of crazy 6 degrees is that? Her husband didn’t even need to call, he vouches for Parker himself. So does Cassie. They say he’s a good guy.
I didn’t bother responding, just closed my eyes again.
It was crazy. Completely fucking nuts.
But sometimes last resorts were.
Chapter Thirteen
Park
“You did what?” Jess shouted in my ear.
I shouldn’t have answered the phone. I was making a sandwich for dinner when it rang, and some stupid part of me immediately jumped to the conclusion that it could be Gwen calling, so I’d hurried into the living room to grab it off the coffee table. That was dumb but answering it once I saw it was Jess was the real mistake.
I’d been at work with her until an hour ago. There was nothing to talk about.
At least, until I answered and was reminded just how small Hoffman was sometimes. Gwen being the friend of a friend of Braden’s partner’s wife small. And that tree had been activated to ask about me.
With the information Jess had, it wasn’t like I could deny it, so I’d told her the truth.
“I offered Gwen my second bedroom,” I repeated.
“How in the world did you possibly end up
doing that?”
There wasn’t an answer to that question that didn’t make me sound like a fool, so I didn’t bother giving one at all.
“It won’t matter. She’s not going to take me up on it.”
“Having her friend ask after Braden in hopes of getting a read on whether or not you’re a psycho sounds like she’s at least thinking about it.”
I couldn’t deny that. I was shocked it was true, but I couldn’t deny it.
“Have you really thought about this?”
Honest answer? No. I’d just said it without thinking at all. If I’d really thought about it even after I blurted it out, I’d have backtracked.
“It isn’t a big deal. Just getting a roommate.”
“She seems like a nice person, but you don’t know her. What if she’s a total slob and never shuts up? What if she gets super bitchy and destroys your shit because you left the toilet seat up? What if—”
“Whatever weird shit Gwen might come with, I’ve lived with worse,” I cut off her tirade.
“You don’t know that.”
I did. Growing up in a house with a junky and an abuser, living with four other guys that did a variety of shady shit to get by, I’d experienced it all. One of my roommates pulled a knife on me because he heard sirens down the street and thought I’d called the cops to report the fact that he was slinging meth.
Anything Gwen could dish up, I could handle.
“I do.”
It was firm, and Jess caught it. She knew when she hit the walls of shit I did not talk about.
“Okay, okay. I get it. I’ll drop it.”
“I appreciate you being concerned about me, but you don’t have to be. She seemed to be stuck in a shit situation, I had the means to offer to help her out. That’s it. We haven’t actually even talked about it. Now can I get back to making dinner?”
“Fine. Yes.”
I got her off the phone, still stuck on the fact that Gwen was considering it at all. I’d thought she’d written it off completely.
Thaddeus was lying on the tree I’d gotten him and set up by the window as planned. His head came up when I turned to face him.
“You think she’ll take me up on it?”
He dropped his head and shifted onto his side until it was lolling off the edge, but his eyes stayed on me.
“Yeah, I’m not sure either.”
The next morning, when my phone rang again, it wasn’t Jess. It was a local number I didn’t know.
“Hello?”
“Hi, Parker. It’s Gwen.”
Fuck.
Not even Jess’s call last night about someone checking into me on Gwen’s behalf could have prepared me for this call. I hadn’t thought there was even a chance she was going to make it, let alone so soon.
“Hey. How are you?”
“Okay. Sore,” she said with a chuckle that sounded strained.
My dick didn’t care. It made me an asshole, but that word took my brain somewhere else entirely. Somewhere it didn’t need to be going.
“Everything seem okay with the tattoo?”
“Oh, yeah. That’s fine. That’s not why I called.” I gave her a second, and she kept going on her own. “I wanted to discuss your offer to rent your second bedroom. I thought maybe, if you had some time, we could meet for coffee to talk about it?”
“Sure. Today?”
“Umm… yes? If it wouldn’t be too much hassle.”
“It’s my day off. I can do whatever.”
“Would one work? That’s when I usually take my lunch anyway.”
“That works.”
“Okay, great.” She sounded relieved, and it had my hackles rising.
We agreed to meet at the coffee shop near the shelter so she wouldn’t have to take any longer a lunch than necessary, and I’d started to relax again as we were hanging up, until she said, “Thank you so much for doing this today.”
Something was up, and I didn’t like it. She’d been frustrated the day before, worn out from apartment hunting, but there was an edge of desperation now that had me on edge the rest of the morning. I didn’t know if she’d tell me why, but I was damn sure going to be asking.
I just had to wait a few hours first.
Gwen came bustling into the coffeeshop at exactly one o’clock. She had on a flowy, sleeveless shirt that was good for her healing back. I’d gotten there a few minutes before and scoped out a good spot. She came over, a smile on her face.
“Hi. Sorry, I got a little held up getting out of the office.” I checked my watch again, confirming she was on time, but didn’t comment on it. “I’ll just go grab a coffee quick.” She looked down at the empty table and added, “Do you want anything?”
There was a decent crowd coming through, though most were getting a drink on the run. Still, tables were pretty full. I stood and pulled out the other chair. “Take a seat, hold the table for us. I’ll get the coffee.”
“Oh, no, I can…”
“Gwen,” I interrupted, nodding at the chair. She blinked at me, but then did as I asked and took a seat. “What do you want?”
“Iced latte, please.”
“Anything to eat?”
She was pulling her purse into her lap, as she answered, “Um… a cranberry orange scone.” She unearthed her wallet, adding, “Just let me get you some—”
“I got it,” I said, already turning away to go order.
When I brought our drinks and her scone back, she was looking out the windows, biting her lip. She didn’t notice me until I set everything down on the table. The sound made her eyes snap to me, and she went right for her wallet again.
“What do I owe you?”
“My treat.”
“Thank you,” she said with a smile. “My turn next time.”
I liked that she didn’t keep arguing about it. Since she graciously accepted, I could give too. “Deal.”
She took a drink but didn’t set her cup back down. Instead, she held it and fiddled with the straw while she drew in a breath. “Your offer.”
That was all she said, so I jumped in. “It’s still on the table. I’ve got the space. I don’t need it to be a full year commitment or anything if you want to keep looking for something of your own.” Hoping it might help put her at ease, I laid it all out. I gave her the rent, the average utilities, the address. I even showed her pictures I’d taken that morning of the apartment for her to have a look and offered to have her by whenever she’d like to see it in person.
She took it all in, not saying much. Until, “Can I ask why?”
That was the weird thing about it all, wasn’t it? Weird enough that I didn’t have an answer, but I tried to figure out one for her.
“When I moved in a couple years ago, I’d planned to find a roommate. Honestly, I didn’t think I could afford the place alone. But I underestimated what it meant to be an artist at Sailor’s Grave. Even when I first got started, the shop’s reputation kept my bookings full until I gained my own. Work was busier than I anticipated and the money was coming in, so I never got around to the roommate thing.
“Then, Jess had a situation. It’s not really mine to get into, but she needed somewhere to stay and someone to help her out for a bit. I volunteered. She moved out a while ago to live with Braden, and I found I kind of… missed the company, I guess. It’s why I ended up adopting Thaddeus.”
Fuck, I sounded like a loser.
“That’s really it. I like you, I don’t think it’d suck to be around you more, and I have the space. So, if you want it, the room is yours.”
She was chewing on her lip again. I had to call on all my self control not to watch her do it. Her lips had already gotten my attention as it was. I’d noticed them, I’d wanted to taste them, I didn’t need that kind of temptation.
It was clear she wasn’t sure about this arrangement, and I couldn’t blame her. I was a guy she barely knew and we were talking about her sleeping across the hall. I’d be worried if she wasn’t hesitant. Which made me w
onder more why we were even here discussing it.
“Can I ask,” I started, and her attention focused back on me, “what changed?”
“I’m sorry?”
“Yesterday, when I offered, you weren’t interested.” She started to open her mouth to protest, but I spoke first. “I’m not offended or anything. It made perfect sense for you to not jump on board. You also mentioned that your current roommate wasn’t giving you a hard deadline or anything. But now here we are, one day later, discussing this. And honestly, you seem off. I know I don’t really know you well, but it still feels like something’s wrong beyond this being a weird situation. Did something happen?”
She lowered her head for a moment, then looked back up. “Am I that easy to read?”
I didn’t want to say she was, but I didn’t want to lie to her. My lack of answer said it for me. She huffed out a laugh that wasn’t all that amused.
“I’m moving out because the place actually belongs to my roommate, and she’s now moved her boyfriend in,” she explained. “Kelly is nice and we haven’t had any issues, but her boyfriend is a total prick. He’s a free-loader and a user and he knows I see it even if Kelly refuses to. I think that’s why he’s determined to get me out. He sees me as a threat. I thought I could put up with him for a bit while I find a place, but I can’t.”
I forced myself to relax my clenched fists. There was more there. This asshole wasn’t just annoying. I didn’t know if it was so extreme as him being a threat to her safety, but there was a desperation to her saying she couldn’t stay there, even as she tried to sound calm.
The desire to find the fucker and deal with him rode me hard, but I checked it. Gwen wasn’t mine, and that wasn’t how I dealt with things. Not anymore.
But I had something I could offer, at least. “If you need to get out of there, my place is yours. You could move in as soon as you want. It’s entirely up to you.”
She looked out the window again, and I gave her time. Her expression was blank, but her eyes flitted all around, a movement that I guessed had nothing to do with what she was seeing, and everything to do with the way her mind was working through everything.
