Rebel Bears MC: (A Bear Shifter Romance Collection)
Page 25
Charlie just shook his head in disbelief. “I guess I don't see it that way. I think being human would be boring. To be so weak and to live such a little amount of time. What would be the point?”
She smiled and told him that that was the point.
“The whole idea of it, that short little span of time that you get to live, seems to make it all that much more special.”
“Why would it be better to live for less time?”
“Then everything would be for a reason, and there would be an urgency that we don't feel in the magical community. We live for hundreds and sometimes thousands of years. Life is cheaper, and nothing matters. But imagine if all you had were a few short precious moments?”
She had not intended to say all of that, and she stopped herself when she realized that she was putting too much passion into it. Since her mama died and she had been stuck with an ailing older aunt to take care of her, there had been a lot of time for Celeste to think about those things.
One thing that she had come to realize was that even though humans were weak, and they didn't live very long, there was something magical to that. There was a bravery in going out every day into a world that was so dangerous, knowing that today it could be their last day. Celeste saw beauty in that, but she knew that many people did not.
From the incredulous look that she was getting from Charlie, it was quite clear to her that he was one of the people that did not see it her way. That was okay, of course. It just meant that she needed to stop talking.
“I've never heard it described like that, but I guess there would be something in what you say.”
She waved him off. “You don't have to indulge me, really. I know how most people feel about it.”
“No, I actually do agree with you. I've always felt like there was more passion in everything that they did because of it. Have you seen some of the ways that they love each other? Statistically, knowing that they only had twenty, maybe thirty good years with each other. It seems like a lot for such a short amount of time.”
It was like Celeste was looking at Charlie for the first time. No longer was he a dumb beast or the violent man that had saved her. He was something else. He was still a man, still dangerous, but also charming and handsome. Those eyes held her where she stood and made her quiver inside.
“Don't you ever want it too?”
“To die early?”
“No, the rest of it; the passion and the living like it could be your last day. Haven't you ever wanted to live that way?”
“I can't say that I have really thought about it. I guess I was just more under the assumption that this is how it is. It's not like I can become a human, so why worry about it?”
Celeste agreed and pressed her lips together.
“Yeah, I guess you're right. I guess I could just accept my plight in life...”
“You may say that, but I have a feeling you don't mean it. You strike me as a woman that never just accepts anything that she doesn’t want. You’re one of those women that gets her way often, I would bet.”
Celeste didn't respond to his comment, but she smiled to herself. He seemed to catch on pretty quick.
Chapter Eleven
Charlie took Celeste out and let her pick whatever she wanted. She was indeed hungry, and they spent about an hour there talking and getting to know one another. He was nervous about going back to the hotel room. There were two beds, but it was a very big room. Charlie just felt like it was a set-up. He didn't know who or why or how, but maybe the universe was tempting him with something it knew he wasn't supposed to have. Whatever it was, maybe it was Charlie that was overthinking things.
As they walked back to the hotel, Celeste was in better spirits and he imagined that it was because she had gotten what she wanted. She had more to ask, much more, and it was quite clear where she was going with it. She was going to want him to do something for her, and it wasn't hard to imagine what it was.
At the moment, it looked like she was trying to get out of going to her aunts. The problem was he didn't have a choice. As much as he wanted to tell her that she could just go on her way and live her adventure, he knew that he couldn't. There were other people's lives at stake, and just because she was beautiful and made him want to look at her forever, didn't mean he could do so.
“So, are you going to tell me why you are doing this for my aunt? You said something about it being your brother’s obligation. What did she do for him?”
He chuckled, and the thought made Charlie smile. How easily life had changed so drastically back then. It didn't happen that long ago, but to him, it felt like a lifetime. How could he have expressed that in words?
“Well, basically, my brother took over the gang from my father. He wasn't very happy about it, my dad, and he came back to take it over. Someone that did magic was able to take our memories away of everything and everyone that we knew and loved and dropped us off three states away. We all knew each other, but we didn't know that we were shifters, just brothers.”
“Wow, I can’t believe that. Was it weird, thinking you were human?”
“Not at all, because I didn’t think that there was anything else. The magical world didn’t exist, none of it did. It was the strangest thing, once my memories came back and I knew who I was. Then it was strange not to know about it, but for those few months, or however long it was, I didn’t feel anything about it, and it certainly did free up some room for other things. I did feel more. Sex was…”
Charlie stopped because he forgot how young she was. She was an adult, sure, but there was an innocence in her. Charlie would have to think that Celeste had been sheltered, especially considering how she acted.
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to go there. Anyway, your aunt helped my brother Donovan find us. Without her, we would still be there now, running around as humans.”
“Is it better this way?”
She was earnest, and it felt like his answer really meant something to her, so he wanted to make sure that he gave her the right one.
“I don’t know if it is better one way or another, but there are things I can’t do as a man that I would have missed. Sex coming back off that was even better than before.”
“Does everything with you revolve around sex?”
At the moment, it was all he could think about. “Sometimes. Doesn’t that happen to you?”
She disagreed and wouldn’t look at him.
“I wouldn’t say that. I find it baseless and a poor way to waste a person’s time. I would rather read a book.”
Charlie scoffed. “Well, now it’s all becoming clear.”
She frowned, asking him what he was talking about. “I didn’t know what it was about you that was so different, but now I see it. It was right in front of my face the whole time.”
“What?”
“You’re a virgin.”
Celeste groaned. “Why do you say it like it’s a bad thing?”
“Well, it just makes sense that you would think a book could ever give the same amount of pleasure as a man could. If you had experienced a man like me, Celeste, you would know that what you say is silly. A book will never compare to an orgasm that makes your toes curl.”
The innocence of her nature and the shock in her eyes only made him want to say more. He got closer, leaned in so that she would hear him well, feel the heat of his breath on her neck.
“There is no way that a night with me would ever be compared to anything so trivial as words.”
Celeste shivered and stole a look at his face. She didn’t say anything, though her eyes portrayed interest, or at least that’s what he wanted to see. He imagined that he would lean in and kiss her. The imaginings were almost enough to feel like it was real. Somehow, somewhere, Charlie figured out that’s what he wanted.
Then the moment was gone, and she was back up, walking back and forth. She was nervous, and he asked her again about what Drennan had said about taking her power.
“How can someone do that?”
>
“If I am deflowered before I am officially given the power, then it will be lost forever. It’s a whole ceremony, sacrifice thing. My aunt wants me to come home and do it. She wouldn’t have wanted me to marry him.”
“So, once you have sex, all your power is gone?”
That explained a lot, and she agreed. He whistled, not knowing what he would have done. Charlie imagined that he wouldn’t have had power very long at all. There were too many temptations in the world, and Celeste was one of them.
“I mean, not all of it. I will still have what I have now, which is a lot, but I won’t be able to do the move-mountains kind of spells that Aunt Evelyn wants me to. She wants to harness my power, just like Drennan wanted to do.”
“Then why was he going to take you in that way, knowing what it would do? And how the hell does he know any of it? He’s a human.”
She shrugged. “I don’t know how he knows, or how he was able to control me. He said he would rather have my body than my power. I guess when you showed up, he wanted something out of it. That guy wanted me to marry him and do his bidding. It was just like Evelyn, except he wanted to do naughty things that made my stomach turn sour when he said them.”
He just shrugged and then tried not to let her words bother him. It was hard to know that she was untouched. Some part of him, deep in the back of his mind, rejoiced at the idea. Not because he was happy about it, but because it would be that much sweeter when he had her for himself. It never occurred to him that she wouldn’t give it up for him. All girls did.
“Do my words do the same thing when I flirt with you?”
She shook her head that they didn’t. “No, I guess they should, because you’re just as bad, but I don’t feel that way with you. I always imagined myself being with a man like you. Strong, handsome, mysterious, but I always thought it would be a warlock.”
He liked to hear that she thought that way about it. Of course, he wanted to be what she was looking for. It hadn’t even occurred to him that it was going to complicate everything twofold. He wasn’t thinking that far ahead. He wasn’t thinking at all when he stopped her pacing and pulled her down to the bed.
Charlie was on top of her, lips and body pressed hard against her, before he even thought of what he was actually doing. He didn’t care, apparently. Her submission and the slight sound of pleasure that came out of her mouth, was all the answer that he needed.
It spurred him on, and his hands were rubbing up and down her side, stopping at her chest and cupping the side of her breasts. She was moaning so softly and gasping when his finger flicked over her breast. He realized then that she was not only a virgin, but untouched in all ways. The excitement coursed through him, and he was leaving her mouth to lick and suck on her neck. Soon, he was moving lower down, and she was squirming underneath him, needing more of it.
Only when he tried to push his hand down her pants did she stop him. It was a quick slap of her hand, and he looked down at her. The blue eyes that he was so attracted to were glistening and wide. He had been so wrapped up in the moment that he had forgotten why he was so turned on. He was turned on, because he needed her badly, so badly in fact, that he almost kissed her again.
“Woah, Charlie. I don’t know what happened, but we can’t do that. I just told you…”
“I know. I know. Sorry. I just…damn you’re beautiful, Celeste. You don’t know how badly the way you look at me makes me want to do so much more to you.”
She swallowed hard and smiled, telling him that she thought it was a good time to go to bed. There was a slight fear in her eyes, and he hated the look of it. It was the last thing that he wanted to see on her delicate face. Literally, the very last thing.
“Sorry, Celeste. You’re right. I don’t know what I was thinking. A little sleep will have it all looking better in the morning.”
“Do you really believe that?”
He shrugged. Charlie didn’t, but he knew that he had to keep saying it. The only other alternative was to defile her in every way possible. If he thought there was a chance, right or wrong, that would be what he would lean towards doing.
He wasn’t sure if it would be better in the morning, but he hoped so. Charlie was hard and ready, knowing that it was going to be a rough night.
Chapter Twelve
Charlie wasn’t the only one that wasn’t able to sleep. Celeste was finding it impossible as well. She was tossing and turning, thinking about everything that Charlie had said. He had made her feel good for a few minutes. Too good. She wasn’t sure how she felt about it, but Celeste knew that she wanted more.
The biggest decision had been who she wanted. Celeste, in her nativity, thought that she would find a perfect man and marry one day. She didn’t think it would be after her twentieth birthday party. It was supposed to be earlier, so her aunt wouldn’t have such control over her still. She had avoided it so far. The only way she was going to get out of her aunt’s shadow was to push forward with a plan.
The only problem was what she was supposed to do about it. If she had sex with Charlie, what her body wanted her to do immediately, she would lose all of the ancient power that was passed down in her family. It was so precious that only the purest could receive it. Many in her family hadn’t, like her mother. She had fallen in love too soon and given it away. It was probably why both women in her family had been so adamant about keeping her isolated. If too many women in the family didn’t pick it up, it would be gone forever.
It was a lot to put on her shoulders, but Celeste knew that it was part of her obligation, the part that she didn’t want. Why was it up to her, the rest of her family’s fate? Why couldn’t she walk away from it all and let it rest on the next person? Why did it have to be her?
“Are you asleep?”
His voice was low, and she shivered inside just from the sound of it. The words that he’d spoken to her earlier were still in her mind. Nothing that they said at the moment was going to help, so she didn’t say a word, pretending that she was asleep. Celeste purposely slowed down her breathing to make it appear so as well, but that was enough to actually put her to sleep. Celeste could work out her problems in her dreams because she was surely going to dream about Charlie. And the kiss.
The next morning was hard to wake up. It was already pretty light outside, and when she sat up in the bed, she was alone in the room. Celeste should have been fine with it, but it was becoming clear that she was more attached to the bear than she should have been. Her mind had come up with all sorts of ideas that she was thinking about with Charlie, and none of them were good. None of them were even plausible.
“Good morning.”
He was coming out of the shower, steam following him, and she averted her eyes immediately. Charlie hadn’t anything on his muscled chest. It was so much bare skin that she didn’t realize that he was wearing a towel.
“I’m not naked, Celeste; chill out. All of the important bits are covered.”
Her eyes went to him again, and she begged to differ. It seemed like all sorts of parts of him were showing, and they looked pretty important to her.
He was saying it so she wouldn’t look away like she was, but Celeste didn’t have a choice. Her face got heated, and she couldn’t look at him like that. Naughty thoughts ran through her head, and Celeste knew that she wasn’t supposed to be thinking about that sort of thing. Since she’d been around Charlie, everything was off. She didn’t feel like herself at all anymore.
“Well, let me know when you’re dressed. I don’t think I can talk to you like that.”
Charlie grinned like he knew exactly what was on her mind, and Celeste wasn’t so sure that he didn’t. She could see the need in his eyes, but it was not the same for her. She knew that whatever happened, Celeste was going to ignore it. She’d stayed up thinking about what it would be like to be with a man, more particularly, a man like him.
She turned her back to him, hoping that he would get dressed quickly and that expanse of chest that she couldn’
t unsee would soon be out of sight and out of mind. She wasn’t sure if that would happen, but she could hope.
“You didn’t sleep very well?”
Celeste didn’t answer for a minute. She had never slept very sound. Death and ghosts, like her mother, kept her up at night. It was another time when they could convene with her, and they used it. A lot.
“Never have.”
“I hope I wasn’t the cause of those dreams, Celeste. I know that I came onto you and how you must feel about it…knowing that you’re a…”
She waved him off. He couldn’t even say it out loud for some reason.
“No, it’s not you.”
In reality, it was a little bit, but mainly, she just wanted him to stop talking. Talking wasn’t going to make it better. She could feel her face heating again.
He moved closer, and she backed up. Being next to him at the moment wasn’t going to make things better. She was convinced that it was going to make things worse. He was the sort of man that bothered women and didn’t even know it.
“Look, maybe we should get back on the road. Do you think we can make it today?”
His face fell. “You’re ready to leave already? I thought you wanted to stay a little while?”
Her face turned to him, and Celeste could see that he was thinking the same thing that she was. He was more apt to let it happen. He wanted her, and it was the first time that Celeste felt that way about it too. She looked at him, knowing that he was going to blow her mind.
Was she running away? It sort of felt like it.
“No, I think we should try to make it back before we both do something that we’re going to regret.”
“I guarantee you this, Celeste: nothing we do together will be regretted. At least not by me.”
How could she look at him when he was saying things like that? Instead of getting into that conversation with him, she decided her best course of action was to get up and get dressed. Back on the trail, she would be able to think about it all, and she would come up with something. Celeste always did, even if it took a minute.