Irreverent: Young Adult Dystopian Romance (The Relevance Series Book 2)

by Sarah Addison-Fox

  All the energy drains from my body, my muscles relax into the mattress. I’ve been given a reprieve. A stay of execution. I don’t know why or how, but at least I now have more time to think of a way out of here.

  Even if they do what Derek says and flush my system, I’m not going anywhere anytime soon. My eyes start to close as fatigue steals my energy completely. My final thought as I slide under is that by ingesting Trey’s homegrown, I probably bought myself at least a couple days grace.

  Mallory.

  We leave the common room and head outside into the dark, still night. A breeze lifts my hair and throws it around my face. Kit glances at me as we cross the walkway. The others are ahead, Jackson and Trey, the man and the woman, all speaking in low tones I can’t quite make out.

  If Kit has taken on a babysitting role, I don’t mind, and she doesn’t seem to either. She smiles as she inhales. “Can you smell that? I planted lavender, and on a night like this you can catch the scent of it.”

  I match her movements and fill my lungs, hoping to catch a small amount of the scent she speaks of.

  But my nerves are too raw, and any enjoyment evaporates as we reach the courtyard.

  I lift my eyes skyward and try to see the stars through the dome, but the structure blocks out much of the night sky, leaving no moon, only the blue track lighting to guide our footsteps.

  I swallow thickly as the vehicle Cristan took from his Unit comes into view. The sight of it as it appears inside is a stark reminder of who else should be inside standing with me. I gaze at the man and woman appraising the vehicle. They appear as ghostly apparitions. The paleness of their skin lends an almost ethereal glow against the backdrop of the dark night. The blue track lighting bounces off their faces, casting shadows and making them look even more ghoulish than they already appear.

  I still don’t know either of their names. No one has brought it up and no one has asked me my name either. I chew my lip as I watch the woman examine the vehicle. Perhaps they have no need of names? Perhaps they have other ways of communicating or interacting that I’m not privy to? Or maybe ghosts don’t require names?

  My unspoken questions go unanswered because I’m too scared to ask them. Without Cristan, I’m an outsider once again. Even Kit’s smiles and comforting words do little to distract me from that knowledge. Cristan isn’t here to guide me, to tell me the meaning of things, names, and places, so I have little to offer, little to contribute.

  The thought rattles inside, forming words that take shape, bubbling away until they force themselves out. “If we get Cristan out,” I start to say. We stand apart from the others as they discuss matters to do with a timer, and mechanics I’m still not comprehending.

  Kit’s head tilts in my direction. “When. When we get him out, okay?”

  I nod and gain a measure of courage from the firmness in her voice. “I want to learn how to live outside the new city. I don’t want to be helpless anymore.”

  Her nose crinkles and she places a hand on my shoulder. I try not to cringe because I think I see tears in her eyes. “I felt that way too. But I learned. You will too. You’re smart, and smart people are never helpless. Don’t you forget that. You thought of something none of us did, because you look at things in a different way.”

  I shake my head. “But you were Relevant. I’m not.”

  She chuckles and removes her hand. “Out here that doesn’t matter. Everyone is equally Relevant or Irrelevant, depending on which way you look at it.” Kit turns and points in the direction of the garden. “The rest are waiting to meet you, but don’t try to act Relevant around them, okay? Be as weird as you like. They don’t trust outsiders.” My legs refuse to obey my instruction to move when she does, but Kit beckons to me, a smile growing. “You have nothing to fear from the ghosts. I promise. Just don’t hide who you are, if you want to do something weird, do it. They’ll appreciate it.”

  I take a faltering step towards her, my mind still paralysed with indecision. She’s giving me permission to be completely and utterly Irrelevant? To stop hiding away, to stop pretending I think the same way everyone else does? Tears start to well in my eyes. With no one else to explain or to tell me to stay with Jackson and Trey, I take a tentative step, heart in my throat as she walks back towards the garden.

  Fragrant scents waft on the breeze and I relish the way it makes me feel even more connected. The heady scents of dirt and moisture ground me, and make my nerve endings come alive. We round the corner, and I’m so enthralled I don’t notice the movement beside the water at first.

  It’s Kit’s posture that makes me tense and freeze. Dozens and dozens of white faces are illuminated as they creep out of the trees towards me. Some are smiling, showing teeth as white as their skin. Others seem to be more cautious in their posture. My pulse starts to speed, I avert my eyes and stare at the blue lighting at my feet.

  Kit’s voice is soft and welcoming. “Hello, friends. This is the girl I was telling you about. She came here with Cristan, the one we’re going to rescue from Doctor Jones.”

  My eyes snap to her, mouth slack. I stutter the name neither Cristan nor I have ever said out loud. “D-d-d-doctor J-j-j-j-ones?” My fear of the approaching Irrelevant ghosts dissipates with the knowledge. Knowledge I’d refused to consider or think of too much.

  Kit’s slight nod gives me enough of a confirmation. A strangled mew escapes my lips. I place my hands over my face. I start to sway, to rock, and try everything I can to calm the raging storm brewing inside. I start to hum, ignoring everyone and everything else. I need to find a way to help Cristan, and I can’t do that if I’m tearing into pieces as memory after memory flashes before my eyes.

  I start to think of dragons, but that only makes me think of Cristan’s tattoo and the scars it hides. He hid so much from me. Hid what the Doctor did to him. I still don’t know what happened, and a part of me wants to hide away myself. I keep humming. The sound starts to echo all around me. I ease my fingers away from my face and find Kit smiling crookedly at the Irrelevant ghosts. Several have their hands extended to the sky, some are rocking too, some are just smiling at me, and some are humming.

  Tears start to fog my vision. My throat grows thick as a girl around my age approaches me. Her gait is unsteady, her eyes almost translucent blue. When she speaks, her voice carries a crack. “We. Go. Get. Him. No. More. Experiments.”

  Another approaches, a man vastly more aged than her. He jabs at his chest and starts to motion with his hands. The others have stopped humming and watch him as his hands fly about dramatically.

  Kit nudges my shoulder. “It’s a type of sign language. It’s a way of communicating without words. A lot of the Ghosts find it difficult to express themselves.”

  The girl smiles at Kit. “We. Are. Ready.” Without another word, they start to move towards us. Kit pulls my arm so we’re standing to one side of the pathway, letting them pass.

  When the last has gone from sight, and Kit and I are alone in the garden, I turn to look at her. “What will happen to Cristan if we can’t get him out?”

  Kit’s smile disappears. “We will.”

  I shake my head. “But what are they doing to him?”

  Kit’s answer is slow in coming. She starts to walk and I hurry to keep up, so I don’t miss a word. “Okay, so, here’s Cristan, perfect subject based on numerous factors, like DNA, neuro scans, MRI’s, blah, blah, blah. They gathered enough evidence to suspect he might end up Irrelevant, but they struck a snag. In order to be able to see if they could control Irrelevant behaviours using Nanotech the way they theorised, they needed to activate his emotions.”

  Bile rises in my throat. My stomach forms multiple knots. “But it didn’t work?”

  Kit shakes her head. “Nope. He was smart enough and motivated enough to escape.”

  My feet carry on towards where the others have gathered, but my mind is kilometres away. Back in the new city, trying to imagine what Cristan must have gone through. “But why did they let him liv
e out here?” I hear myself ask.

  Kit shrugs her shoulders. “No one really knows. We can’t find anything official, but with the amount of credits they invested in him, they wouldn’t have left him unmonitored. Not really. It was only a matter of time before they wanted to check on him. That’s pretty much why I agreed with Jackson that there was enough reason to drag him into this.” She sighs deeply. “If he escaped as a kid because he loved a brother he’d never even seen, can you imagine what he’s capable of now? He’s basically spent the last six years learning everything the G didn’t want him to know. Coupled with the fact they have his brother, and that he’s away from you…” She turns to face me and a smile starts to grow. “That’s why we refer to him as a weapon. And since Doctor Jones is the man who put all that tech inside him, and since Cristan now knows the Doctor also hurt you, I dare say our weapon isn’t far from exploding again.”

  Cristan.

  I’ve slipped into a light doze when he walks stiff-necked back into the room. It’s always strange seeing him without his scrubs and face mask. It’s like seeing an animal without its skin. He looks different, less menacing somehow. His movements as he approaches the bed I’m tied to are stilted as always. Despite one being false, both his eyes still manage to carry the ice that always made fear shiver down my body.

  I can’t move, so I narrow my eyes as he taps away on a tablet he carries. His eyes never leave the screen, and if I didn’t know him, I’d assume he was talking to himself. “Captain Trainor came to see you? Told you there will be a Relevance test?”

  I don’t bother to answer him. What’s the point? I just roll my eyes back and stare at the ceiling. My insolence gets to him almost instantly. Had he forgotten so soon? Forgotten how much I used to goad him into losing his cool so he’d drop things, or a flush would rise to his stoic features. It was always the closest thing to fun I ever got in this hell hole. He lifts his gaze so he’s peering at me. A trickle of unease works its way down my spine as a close approximation to a smile appears on his face. “I’ve been looking into the Irrelevant girl. Very interesting.”

  A cold chill runs over my skin, but I know what he’s trying to do, so I grit my teeth. “Must be pissing you off something fierce you can’t cut into me again, eh?”

  Something reptilian flickers in his eyes. “If that’s what my superiors consider best, it is my great honour to comply.”

  I bark a bitter laugh. “You weren’t happy you’d finally get to pay me back? To finish what you started?”

  He tilts his head, eyes fixed on me, in a way that reminds me of Solar. My stomach knots. What would they have done with her? An Irrelevant mutt inside one of the G run Units. She’s probably dead already. The thought fuels my hatred for him and his kind even hotter. He only releases a sigh, like he’s both disappointed in me and bored. “Do I regret losing my eye? Certainly. Do I regret you escaping? Not at all. It’s been most enlightening.” I flinch as he taps away on the tablet and spins it around so I can see it. Screeds and screeds of encrypted data are rolling past as keeps his finger depressed. He taps it again and enlarges the text. “It really was a genius idea of Captain Trainor to come and tell you about your Irrelevant sibling being born. It’s no wonder he earned the promotion. Without knowing what your triggers really were, you would have been useless.” He does smile at me then, and all the blood inside my body runs cold. “But now, Cristan, now we know exactly which buttons to push to activate you.”

  I clench my fists so hard I start to lose feeling in them. “You can’t control me,” I grind out.

  His lips purse and a familiar smugness settles in. “Oh, yes we can. Haven’t you learned that yet? We control everything and everyone Cristan. Inside the city, in the Units. Everywhere.”

  The words are past my tongue before I think to stop them. “Not everywhere.”

  His smugness falters a little, but returns in a split-second. “Ah. You speak of No Man’s Land. The last refuge of the unspeakably Irrelevant.”

  A ripple of worry works its way down my spine. He knows something about who lurks outside the wall, past the graveyard and past the Units. He won’t tell me. No one would bother to. Unless it’s to get information out of me. “There’s nothing out there. It’s a wasteland.”

  My skin rises at the disdain on his face. “That’s the best place for useless parts. That experiment was a waste of resources and never would have happened under our current Prime Minister’s leadership.” My breath catches the way it always does when the Prime Minister is mentioned. I should be used to the feelings his official title provokes, but after all this time, it still makes my blood boil when people afford him accolades and respect he doesn’t deserve. His gaze flickers to my clenched fists and a tight smile appears on his face. “As soon as your system is flushed, we’ll begin the cognitive part of your test. I’m sure you’ll fail miserably, so I’m certain you’ll be back with me before you know it.”

  His voice is so undeniably cheerful I have to tense every muscle in my body to keep from shouting vulgar obscenities at him. He turns neatly and strides from the room. When I’m sure he’s out and isn’t peeking at me from the sliver of glass in the door, I repeatedly slam the back of my head down on the pillow.

  I’ll be damned if I let him get to me again, but I’ve read enough and seen enough to know he speaks the truth about the control they really do have. They control the food that’s eaten inside the city and out. They taint the water supply with contraceptives so that the population is kept to a minimum until a contract is signed and both parties agree to a life pairing. They regulate the amount of ozone that gets through, the light, the knowledge, the history, and no one knows any different. No one dares to question. They think it’s all for their own protection. All for the greater good. They think that the Relevance system is fair and just and that our government is a great big loving benefactor who even takes care of the lowest of the low.

  I scoff into the empty room. I curse again when I catch sight of the small box signifying the camera recording my every move. I regret my reaction to the green-eyed bastard. I need to keep my head. I need to keep it together because if they are watching me around the clock, and they wouldn’t risk not to after my last escape, it means a breakout is looking less likely.

  Chapter 13

  Mallory.

  My thoughts jump around in time with my body as we fly over the road. I’m wedged in with Kit and the woman on either side of me. The woman’s breathing is as rapid as mine, her fingers gripping the handhold, her eyes squeezed shut. Jackson is driving, though given his waxy completion, I wonder if it shouldn’t be Trey in control of the vehicle, but Trey has gone with the man to other vehicles they say will join us at the wall.

  Terror is flooding my body. My heart is in my throat as I think about what we are going to attempt. No one has ever broken into the new city before. At least, not that I’m aware of. My fingers tangle into the belt that’s strapped across my waist. Kit insisted I wear it this time, and she made sure the woman was secured too. I send her a nervous smile as we jolt over the bump that signifies the end of the paved road and the beginning of a rough ride back.

  Kit’s eyes are fixed ahead, slightly to the right, her jaw tight and her finger tapping on the seat beside her leg. I follow her gaze and see she’s watching Jackson very, very closely. I still don’t understand their relationship. She doesn’t seem the type to pair up as easily as most do. Relevant or Irrelevant. But if she and Trey are in a pairing, there doesn’t seem to be any kind of long-term commitment, but then again, the pairing is a government ideology. Does it even apply out here? Does anything from the new city apply?

  My fingernails start to tug the dry skin away from my short nails. It’s an Irrelevant behaviour my sister was always quick to quash. I still feel as though I’m doing something wrong so I relax my hands at my sides and tap the way Kit is doing. I pass the time it takes to get to where Trey and Kit’s huts are by thinking of what I want to say to Cristan when I see him.
>
  I’m angry, scared and sad all at once. It’s as if my emotions are threading together so I can’t pick one to concentrate on. This is nothing new, but it’s been years since I felt quite as confused as I do right now. Maybe the medication I was being given dampened down my emotions the way Cristan thought they had.

  I have so many thoughts, so many emotions, and the noise of the engine is compounding them. It isn’t long before I do as the woman beside me is, and I close my eyes and start to hum. I’m in the air again. Flying. I lose myself. The noise of the droning engine, the smell of solvents, the nervousness floats away as I willingly disconnect.

  It’s the sound of a voice crackling that breaks the illusion of freedom I’m trying to cling to. I open my eyes and find Kit leaning forward in her seat, her hands are gripping the back of Trey’s seat and her eyes are on Jackson. I’d not noticed we were slowing, so my eyes pop as I see we’re right outside the graveyard. I still can’t comprehend the need to mark the site of rotting flesh with crossed sticks. If Cristan is right and it’s to do with Irrelevant religion, then it’s one of the many things I’ll have to add to my mental list to investigate.

  Now that we’ve slowed down, I can hear the other vehicles behind us. I twist in my seat so I’m looking over my shoulder. I can see lights bouncing around as large vehicles approach with speed. With a nervous gulp, I look to Kit for an answer as to what will happen next, but her eyes are on Jackson as he reaches forward to grab hold of a box. It’s similar to the one in the control room, and as more static comes through the box, I realise it must be a portable version.

  Jackson brings the smaller box to his mouth and twists slightly to lock eyes with Kit. “Ink Man, this is Animal, do you copy?” The static continues and Jackson shakes his head at Kit. The woman beside me stirs and speaks for the first time since we left the Zoo.