No Job for a Girl

by Meredith Appleyard

  They travelled the twenty minutes to the hospital in silence, each lost in their own thoughts. Leah wouldn’t let herself entertain the idea that Eve was on a similar trajectory as her mother had been. Close friends, her mother and Eve had sometimes joked about how different they were, in looks as well as temperament. Eve had always been the stable and reliable one of the two.

  Leah scrutinised her grubby jeans and work shirt, and the dusty jacket on her lap, relieved she’d changed her steelcaps for sneakers. Too bad if she looked like she’d stepped off a construction site – she had.

  Paul pulled in near the main entrance and left the car idling while Leah climbed out. ‘I’ll text you when I leave the hospital,’ she said.

  ‘Are you sure you don’t want me to come back for you?’

  ‘You go home and take care of yourself. Make sure you eat something.’

  He attempted a shaky smile.

  Leah slammed the car door and drew in a fortifying lungful of air. She’d lost count of the number of hospital entrances she’d stepped through in her years as a nurse. Now, as the automatic doors glided open, Leah remembered one particular hospital entrance. Twenty-three years ago Eve had been beside her when they’d walked through the doors to say goodbye for the last time to a mother and a best friend.

  Carpet silenced each footfall; piped classical music aimed to soothe. ‘I’m here to see Eve Prentice,’ Leah said, peering around a huge floral arrangement on the reception desk. The immaculately coiffed receptionist directed Leah to the East Wing.

  Leah felt as if she was in a daze. What would she say to Eve? What could she say? She had no right to rant and rave and tell her to get a grip, but at that moment it was how she felt. Angry, and scared. Eve had always been her rock. She wished she could talk to Alex.

  She arrived at the nurses’ station. ‘I’m Leah Jackson, a close friend of Eve Prentice,’ she said to the RN hovering at the desk. Thick iron-grey hair was scraped back into an unfashionable bun, and remnants of pink lipstick applied hours ago curdled in the corners of her mouth. Her brown eyes were kind; her smile gentle.

  ‘Ah, Leah, yes. Her husband was hoping you’d visit. Room seven. She’s up and about and it’s okay for you to go in,’ the RN said.

  ‘Is there anything I should know?’

  ‘No, nothing she won’t be able to tell you herself.’

  The door was ajar and Leah tapped lightly before tentatively pushing it far enough open to poke her head in. ‘Eve? Can I come in?’

  Eve sat slumped on the edge of the bed. A shapeless white h­ospital gown drooped over one shoulder and gaped at the back. Her hair was mussed and matted to her head. Eve looked every one of her sixty years, and then some.

  ‘Leah,’ Eve sighed, and punctuated it with a loud hiccough.

  In five strides Leah was across the room. She flung her bag and herself onto the bed and wrapped her arms around Eve.

  The minutes ticked past as they clung to each other.

  ‘I swear I wasn’t trying to kill myself,’ Eve said, pulling back so she could look into Leah’s face. Eve’s eyes were red and puffy. ‘You have to believe me. I desperately wanted to sleep so I drank too much, and then when I still didn’t sleep, I took some pills . . . can’t remember how many. The doctor doesn’t think it could have been many.’

  ‘Why won’t you talk to Paul? He’s hurting. He loves you.’

  ‘I feel so ashamed.’ Eve sniffed and turned away. Leah tugged several tissues out of a nearby box and handed them to her. Eve blew her nose.

  ‘I don’t deserve him,’ she said, wadding the tissues in her hand. ‘His first wife dying of that god-awful disease, and here’s me, falling to pieces at the first major obstacle thrown in my path.’

  ‘You do love him, don’t you? You want to stay with him?’

  ‘Of course I love him!’ Eve rose unsteadily to her feet and, clutching the back of her hospital gown, she began pacing around the room. ‘But he’s going to retire and he wants to go caravanning! I don’t mind the retiring bit, but I cannot imagine being cooped up with him in a caravan for weeks on end. I would go completely out of my mind.’

  ‘Didn’t you talk about stuff like that before you got married? Let’s face it, you were both closer to retirement than not when you met.’

  Eve spun around and squinted at Leah. ‘He might have m­entioned it, and I might have thought he couldn’t be serious.’

  ‘There’s a solution there somewhere.’

  Eve threw her hands in the air. ‘Of course there is, but where will I get another job at my age?’

  ‘Ah,’ said Leah, ‘now we get to the real issue. You want to go back to work.’

  ‘I didn’t want to leave in the first place. I was good at what I did. Better than good. And I’m not too old.’

  ‘Your ability to do your job was never in question. They lost funding for the position.’

  ‘I know that,’ Eve snapped. ‘But they could have made someone else redundant.’

  ‘Why didn’t you take the part-time position they offered?’

  Eve walked the few steps to the window. ‘Pride,’ she said quietly, facing away from Leah. ‘And you know what they say about pride.’

  They talked some more. Leah persuaded Eve to shower, wash her hair and discard the hospital gown in favour of the sleepwear Paul had packed in an overnight bag.

  When they heard the meal trolley arrive, Leah said, ‘If you don’t mind, I’ll get going. My day started early, and I’m beat.’

  ‘Is Paul picking you up?’ Eve lifted the cover off the soup bowl and wrinkled her nose.

  ‘No, I’m taking a taxi to your place and he’s running me home from there.’

  ‘He’s not coming back here tonight?’

  ‘He didn’t say, but I got the impression he wasn’t.’

  Eve looked crestfallen. She put the lid back on the soup.

  Leah rummaged at the bottom of her bag for her mobile phone. No missed call from Alex, not that she’d expected there to be one. She scrolled through her contacts and called a taxi.

  ‘I should ring him, shouldn’t I?’ Eve said, pushing the untouched meal away.

  Leah slung her canvas bag across her shoulder. ‘Yes, I’d say the next move is definitely yours.’

  They hugged and Leah said, ‘Let me know what happens in the morning. I’m down for a night shift tomorrow but if you need me to, I can take you home.’

  Eve frowned. ‘I wish you didn’t have to work as much as you do.’ She held up her hand when Leah opened her mouth to speak. ‘But I remember clearly what it was like to have an outrageous mortgage and only one income.’

  Leah pecked Eve on the cheek. ‘We’ll talk some more in the morning. Eat something. And ring him.’

  It was dark when, two hours later, Paul lifted her suitcase out of the back of his car and plonked it down onto Leah’s driveway. She promised to talk to him the very next day, and watched his tail-lights disappear into the night.

  Leah scrounged up the energy to say a quick hello to Rose, c­uddle Sasha, have a hot shower and feed herself, thanks to a slow cooker and her wonderful neighbour, before falling into bed. Her last thought as she slipped into sleep was to hope she had enough stretch left in her rubber band and wouldn’t go down in a screaming heap herself.

  But that didn’t stop her from taking on four night shifts during her rest leave. Not to mention visiting Eve each afternoon, walking Sasha every morning and having breakfast with Rose before staggering to bed.

  When Friday night came around, Leah was worn out and grumpy, not helped by what had happened late Thursday afternoon. On her way back from visiting Eve, she’d stopped in at Burnside Village to pick up dog food and a few other groceries. Treating herself to a latte at Cibo’s, she’d been horrified to see Richard in charge of a trolley loaded with groceries beside a pert, youngish woman pushing a state-of-the-art pram.

  Praying for the earth to open up and swallow her, Leah was let down badly by the gods. Before she could mo
ve, her ex had spotted her, nudged Mrs Pert, and the trolley and perambulator were barrelling in her direction.

  All babies were beautiful and Richard’s daughter was no exception. Gazing down at her, asleep in her pram, Leah had experienced a suffocating sense of sadness, though she’d managed to ooh and ahh, to blather on about heaven knows what, before making a tactful withdrawal.

  Later, on the drive home, she’d rehashed the whole meeting. It’d left her feeling totally flummoxed that Richard had thought she’d want to meet his new wife and their baby. Leah had been powerless to prevent the angry, self-pitying tears when they’d come.

  To top it off, she’d heard nothing at all from Alex. Her emotions were a tired, tangled mess. Leah was bemused by the amount of time she’d spent thinking about Alex. One minute it was all so simple and she’d do whatever she could to make their relationship work, the next, she’d be overwhelmed by the hopelessness of it all. And at the back of her mind, nagging like a toothache, was the memory of Richard’s daughter, and what a cute little thing she’d been.

  Dressed and ready for another graveyard shift, Leah dropped the night’s sustenance – soup, fruit and muesli bars – into her canvas tote. When there was a knock on the front door she opened it with a smile, expecting Rose, back for the slow cooker. Instead she opened the door to find Alex, tired and hesitant, standing on the doorstep.

  Leah’s welcoming smile faltered. Alex had the distinct impression it hadn’t been for him in the first place.

  ‘You should have called,’ she said. ‘I’m on my way out.’

  ‘I should have.’ He couldn’t keep the surprise off his face as he raked her from head to foot, taking in the practical shoes, navy blue slacks and crisp white blouse with the nursing agency’s logo e­mblazoned on the pocket. Purple shadows bruised the delicate skin below her eyes. She inched behind the open door, using it like a shield.

  ‘You’re working? I would have thought twenty-one twelve-hour days in a month would have been enough.’

  ‘Well, they’re not. I didn’t want to lose my home, so I bought out Richard’s share. I have a mortgage so crippling it keeps me awake some nights.’

  ‘Why didn’t you tell me?’

  ‘And how is my financial situation your business? We might have slept together once, but —’

  ‘Stop right there, Leah. You know as well as I do this is more than a one-night stand. Why do you think I’m here now?’

  ‘For another one-night stand?’

  ‘Jesus, Leah! What is the matter with you? Are you going to let me in, or are we going to have this conversation on the doorstep?’

  ‘You say you’ll call but I don’t hear anything from you, and then you show up unannounced. What am I supposed to think?’

  ‘We knew seeing each other wouldn’t be easy.’

  ‘Is that what we’re doing? Seeing each other?’ Determination firmed her jaw and he braced himself, knowing what was coming and hating the fact that she might be right.

  ‘I’ve had all week to think, Alex, and I’m sure you have too. This thing between us, there’s really no place for it to go. You need to spend the little time you do have at home with your boys and your dad. And I can’t put my job in jeopardy. I’ve taken enough risks already. Maybe it’s best for both of us if I just see you back there on Monday and we stick to business.’

  She started to shut the door. Alex came close to panicking. He didn’t like the feeling. He stepped over the threshold and stopped her, holding the door open.

  ‘I won’t let you do this, Leah. I’ve thought about you all week. How I couldn’t wait to see you again.’

  It hurt Alex to see tears glistening in her eyes. She strode away and stood in the centre of the living area, arms folded, her rigid back to him. He came in and closed the door.

  ‘Where’s Sasha?’

  ‘Staying with Rose. I’ll pick her up in the morning.’

  Alex massaged his temples. He’d had a hell of a day so far. Now he had a matter of minutes to make things right before she left for her damned night shift.

  ‘You must be worn out,’ he said quietly. She shrugged and Alex covered the few steps separating them. He placed his hands on her shoulders and then let them slide down her arms. Interminable s­econds ticked by and then, when he’d almost given up hope, he felt her relax. He closed his eyes in gratitude. She leaned back into him, resting the back of her head on his shoulder.

  ‘I’ve missed you,’ he whispered against her hair, encircling her in his arms.

  ‘Why didn’t you call, email, anything?’

  ‘You know how busy it is. There’s been no end to the problems with Camp Two. It rained. We had bogged vehicles. We didn’t have phone or internet for twenty-four hours. Trev twisted his ankle, and some idiot rolled the tele-handler into a ditch.’

  Leah shifted around in his arms so they were facing each other. ‘I have to go or I’ll be late for work,’ she said.

  He brushed his lips against hers. ‘Can’t you ring in sick?’

  ‘I have a shift tonight because someone phoned in sick.’ She disentangled herself, smoothing her clothes and hair, and glanced at the clock. ‘You can stay if you want. I’ll be back about eight in the morning. Make yourself at home.’

  ‘We’ll talk tomorrow, then?’

  ‘All right.’

  ‘And Leah,’ he said, putting a hand on her shoulder as she dipped to retrieve a carryall from the sofa. ‘I didn’t come here for another one-night stand. I came here to see you, to spend time with you.I need you to know that.’

  ‘Okay,’ she said. ‘And I’m sorry for being so grumpy. It’s been a tough few days with Eve, and with work, and I hadn’t heard from you and I thought —’

  He shook his head slowly. ‘Don’t think anything. We’ll talk tomorrow.’

  She smiled but it didn’t quite reach her eyes.

  After Leah had driven off, Alex opened the bottle of red he’d brought to share, sat on her sofa and stared at the cold, blank face of the slow combustion stove until his vision began to blur. What on earth was she doing working night shifts as well as holding down a full-time, full-on, job? In the back of his mind something niggled about the company policy on second jobs. He wondered if Eve knew. He was almost certain Paul didn’t.

  The wine was rich and smooth, a blend picked from the vines grown in the terra rossa soils of the Coonawarra region. Alex regretted that Leah wasn’t there to share it with him. There was so much he wanted to talk to her about. He topped up the glass, kicked off his boots and put his feet up.

  The meeting he’d been called to, or interview really, at the ivory tower earlier had left him with more questions than answers. Travis Marshall, the young engineer who’d filled in for Paul several weeks ago, was another contender for Paul’s job. When Alex had discovered this his feelings had been mixed. If he was so sure he didn’t want the position, why did he care that someone else did?

  Paul was convinced the position was Alex’s if he wanted it, but Alex wasn’t so sure. Travis was young, keen, had three university degrees, and wore his suit like a second skin.

  Alex had no qualms about his ability, or capacity, to do the job; his doubts were more about how he’d tolerate working in the city. He loved the outback. There was something about the wide open spaces that never lost its visceral appeal. He also wasn’t sure about giving up the autonomy of his current job. Mostly he was left to his own devices and, providing everything went smoothly and safely, no one questioned how he got the job done.

  He picked up the wine glass and padded around Leah’s home, going from room to room, having a good old stickybeak. After all, she had said to make himself at home.

  But the place was empty without her. In fact, if he was honest with himself, his future would be empty without her.

  He wandered back down the stairs into the master bedroom and switched on the light. After only one night there, the room felt and smelled familiar. He chose not to think about the man who’d slept there befo
re him. Leah had told him the first thing she’d done after her partner had left was to buy a new bed.

  Heavy block-out drapes covered the floor to ceiling windows. The king-sized bed was neatly made and an Elizabeth George novel sat on the bedside table next to the charging dock for her phone. Colourful woven mats offset the floorboards on either side of the bed.

  He sat down on the end of the bed. What would Leah be doing now? Most likely hurrying along a dimly lit hospital corridor somewhere. Before he could think any better of it, he took out his phone and messaged her.

  Your home is lovely, but it’s lonely without you.

  He stared at the blank screen, relief washing through him when it burst to life in his hand.

  You’ll find a clean towel in the laundry cupboard. It is pandemonium here. Sleep tight.

  Where are you?

  Triage in A&E at the Royal Adelaide. I’d rather be home in bed :)

  So much for dimly lit corridors. Alex collected the duffel bag he’d left beside the front door. He found a towel and took a long, hot shower, then climbed into bed, dragged up the doona and reached for the novel.

  Somehow it didn’t seem at all strange to be reading Leah’s book, sleeping in Leah’s bed between Leah-scented sheets, even though she wasn’t there. Alex read for a while, and drifted to sleep with a smile on his face.

  It was the sound of the shower that woke him. He lay there, taking a moment to remember where he was. Leah crawled into bed beside him, warm, fragrant and almost naked, and he knew it was where he always wanted to be.

  ‘How was it?’ he said, his voice thick with sleep.

  ‘Horrendous. I’m well and truly knackered. Must be a full moon, brings out all the crazies.’

  He laughed, a low, husky rumble, and reached for her. ‘Mmm, you smell good,’ he said, nuzzling against her neck while his hand found its way up under her t-shirt ‘. . . and you feel good too.’

  They kissed and made slow, sleepy love. Physically sated, Alex dozed. Beside him, Leah slept the sleep of the exhausted.

  ‘You’re awake.’