A Reckless Life

by Michelle Files

  I could see headlights coming down the driveway behind me and I moved over to the left side to let the car go by. It slowed down as it came near me, and I could see that Adam was driving. He looked over at me, but kept going. Wow, really? I looked around and there was not a soul in sight. No one would have seen him pick me up in the dark, so far from the house.

  “Would it have killed you to pull over and pick me up back there?” I chided him as I climbed into the passenger seat a few minutes later. He had actually come around and opened the door for me, which was very sweet. He was wearing slacks and a nice button down shirt. He looked very nice. I had dressed up too. I still didn’t have anything fancy, but was making some money, and bought a cute dress and sandals.

  “Sorry. I just figured it was better to get off the ranch before anyone saw us together.” He seemed a little embarrassed.

  I didn’t respond.

  We made small talk on our drive over to the zoo. It was obvious that we were both nervous. I had never been on a real date before. Yes, I had a couple of boyfriends in high school, but we just hung out. We never went on actual dates. So, this was all new to me.

  When we arrived, I was really surprised at the sight of it all. I expected some worker to be waiting for us in front of a dark zoo to let us in. But, that wasn’t the case. The front of the zoo had white lights strung everywhere. It was so beautiful. Magical even. Adam got out of the car, walked around to my side and opened my door for me. I just smiled at him. He then opened the back passenger door and reached in for something. I was surprised when he pulled out a picnic basket.

  “I’ve prepared a nice meal for us,” he explained when I asked him about the basket.

  “You prepared it?” I asked him, with a silly smirk on my face. He laughed.

  “Well, okay, you caught me. I didn’t prepare it myself. My friend owns a restaurant in town and he had it made up for me. He doesn’t ask questions.”

  “I see.”

  Had he done this before? Was I just another one in a long line of girlfriends? Maybe. No, probably not. Even though he was married and we were on a date, I doubted that Adam made a habit of cheating on his wife. On the other hand, I could be completely wrong. It’s been known to happen.

  “Can you carry this blanket?” he asked, handing it to me before I had a chance to answer.

  He closed both car doors and led me over to the entrance of the zoo. He then pulled a key from his pocket and opened the front gate for me. It was mostly quiet, the animals had probably bedded down for the night, but I could hear a growl and a squawk off in the distance. It was a bit unnerving. I knew they were all locked up tight. But, knowing that we were the only two people there, with hundreds of dangerous, wild animals surrounding us, was a bit scary.

  We walked slowly through the zoo for about ten minutes, until we reached a nice grassy area near the aviary. He sat the picnic basket down and took the blanket that was draped over my arm from me, spreading it out on the grass. He then gestured for me to have a seat. I was very nervous when I sat down. He sat down next to me and started taking things from the basket. I was surprised by how much it held. It was quite a spread, consisting of delicious looking food from the French restaurant his friend owned. He poured both of us a glass of wine to start, and we ate dinner while enjoying the peacefulness of the zoo.

  “This is really beautiful. I’ve never been in a zoo alone, in the dark before,” I told him.

  “You aren’t alone.”

  “You know what I mean. This is just really nice. Thank you for bringing me here.”

  “You don’t have to thank me. It’s my pleasure. I’ve been really looking forward to us being alone together for a change. Away from the ranch, I mean,” He told me.

  “Yeah, me too.” I replied.

  “I want to tell you something,” he said, as we were finishing up our meal. “I think I’m falling in love with you.” He looked at me for a response, his eyes hopeful.

  I took a deep breath. “I think I’m falling in love with you too,” I responded. It was the truth. We had spent a lot of time together over the last several weeks. I knew it was wrong, but I loved him. I couldn’t help myself.

  That’s when he leaned over and kissed me for the first time. It was a gentle, loving kiss. He had the softest lips. He made me feel like I had never been kissed before and I just melted into him. We made love right there, while listening to the animals nearby. I kind of felt like we were being watched. Actually, we probably were being watched.

  Afterward, common sense hit me upside the head. “What are we doing?” I said a bit too loudly, pushing him away.

  “You know what we are doing,” he replied, reaching for me. “You knew what you were getting yourself into when you agreed to come here with me.”

  “You are married. We can’t do this.”

  “I know, you’re right. But, I love you,” he responded, taking me into his arms again. Like that made it all okay. But, it wasn’t okay.

  “I love you too, but that’s not the point. You know we shouldn’t be here.” I pushed him away again.

  “I want to keep seeing you,” he told me.

  “What about Sarah? What if she finds out?” I was definitely worried about that.

  “How is she going to find out? I’m not going to tell her, are you?”

  “Of course not.”

  This made me think. Did I really want to be with a man that would cheat on his wife, and not be sorry about it? What if we got married someday? Would he do the same thing to me? Married to Adam. I can’t believe I was even thinking about that. He would never divorce Sarah. Would he? No, Violet would never allow that.

  The next morning, right after we were finished serving and cleaning up after breakfast, I walked into town to see Huck. He smiled when he saw me walk in and sit down at my usual table. He walked over with a coffee and muffin and sat them down in front of me. Then he sat down.

  “Thanks.”

  “Sure. Are you okay? You look a bit depressed,” he told me.

  I’m sure he was right. I was up most of the night thinking about Adam and how in the world I was going to deal with all of it. I had dragged myself to work that morning and got through it, barely. Oliver yelled at me a couple of times when he noticed I was dragging along. He was right, of course. As soon as I was finished, I told Oliver that I would be back in a couple of hours, and I left for town.

  “Well, I did something I shouldn’t have.”

  “Really? What?” He asked me, while reaching over and pinching off a piece of my blueberry muffin and taking a bite.

  “I slept with Adam last night.” I said it very quietly and looked down at my plate in shame.

  “You what?!” he almost yelled. I looked around to see if anyone had heard him. A couple people looked over curiously, but went back to their conversations when I gave them a look.

  I didn’t even respond to that. I was so ashamed.

  “I can’t freaking believe you did that. What in the world were you thinking!”

  “Please stop yelling. You’re embarrassing me,” I whispered to him.

  “Sorry, okay.” He calmed down then, looking around. No one seemed to be paying any attention to us. “Why did you do that?” He was much quieter.

  “Because I love him.” It was a stupid answer. Love did not justify my actions and I knew it.

  “Are you being serious with me right now?” He didn’t believe me.

  “Yes I am. I can’t help how I feel.”

  “What about his wife? Did you forget all about her?” He was obviously angry with me.

  “No, I didn’t forget about Sarah. But, we love each other.” I heard myself, and still couldn’t believe I was saying those words.

  “You need to break it off with him,” he told me matter-of-factly.

  “No, I can’t do that.” An argument was coming. I could feel it in the air.

  “Yes you can. If you don’t, then you are going to have big problems. His wife will find out, she
will fire you and maybe divorce Adam. Do you want to be responsible for all of that and be out on the streets again?”

  He had some really valid points.

  “None of that is going to happen. Just leave me alone!” I yelled. This time everyone in the cafe turned to look at us. “Mind your own damn business!” I yelled at them as I stormed out.

  Huck didn’t follow me and I was just fine with that. If he couldn’t understand how much I loved Adam, then that was his problem.

  A few days later Huck called me at the house. “I’m sorry,” he told me. “I’m just worried about you.” He seemed sincere.

  “I know. I’ll be careful, I promise.”

  “You’ll be careful about what?” I spun around to see Violet standing in the doorway of the library, where I was talking on the phone.

  “I’ve gotta go,” I told Huck and hung up the phone.

  “Nothing,” I said to Violet. “Look, I need to talk to you about something.”

  She just stood there waiting for me to explain.

  “I can’t do this. I can’t get pregnant on purpose.”

  “I see. Then what was the other night?” She asked me.

  My face lit up with surprise. What did she know about that? She couldn’t possibly know. Was she bluffing? That seemed like an odd bluff, if she had no idea at all that we had started seeing each other.

  “I see by the surprise on your face that you have no idea what I know.”

  “I don’t know what you are talking about,” I tried to deflect. I didn’t think it was going to work.

  “Yes you do. I know about your date with Adam at the zoo.”

  I was in shock. She did know. How was that possible? I didn’t even respond. What could I say?

  “You underestimate me, Abigail. I know a lot of people in town and they keep me informed of anything having to do with my family.” She seemed satisfied with herself and smirked at me.

  “Oh.” That was all I could force out of my mouth.

  “So, it seems that you decided to take me up on my offer after all?”

  “Yes…I mean no,” I blurted out.

  “Which is it? Yes or no?” She seemed to be much more patient than usual.

  “It’s no. I don’t want to do this.”

  “It looks to me like you already did.”

  Wow, she really did know what was going on. Was someone watching us in the zoo? All of us sudden I felt really dirty.

  “Well…I know. I don’t want to lie to Adam though. I think I love him.” I don’t know why I told her that. It wasn’t going to help my case.

  “Is that right?” She was so smug.

  “Yes, that’s right. I love him and I can’t lie to him. He loves me too. He told me so. I want to keep seeing him, but I won’t get pregnant. I wouldn’t do that to him.” Even as I was saying them, I couldn’t believe the words that were coming out of my mouth.

  “We will see about that.” She then turned around and walked out the door.

  There was no telling what that woman would do, and I was suddenly very afraid of Violet Tyler.

  Chapter 14

  Adam and I continued to see each other. We met when we could and I don’t think anyone caught on. At least no one said anything to either one of us about it, not that I expected anyone too. Unless it was Violet or Sarah, I was pretty sure no one would have the nerve to bring it up in conversation. How would that go anyway? Something like: ‘I heard you and Adam are having a wild fling behind his wife’s back.’ No, I don’t think that would happen.

  The weird thing was that Violet was strangely quiet about the whole thing. She obviously knew, but didn’t mention it again. Oh, she was still hateful to me, that wasn’t going to change. But, she didn’t bring up Adam and me again. It almost would have been better if she had bugged me about it. At least then I would know where she stood. The silent treatment regarding Adam was unnerving. Unfortunately, I didn’t have anyone I could even talk to about it, and I wanted that desperately. It was hard keeping everything all bottled up inside. Huck hated the idea of Adam and me together, so that was out of the question. He just didn’t understand. I didn’t feel close enough to have that conversation with Teresa about her boss. That would just be weird. I thought about calling Josie, my friend from high school, but thought better of it. Nothing good could come from me calling her. She was my worst influence. I just didn’t need that, or her, in any part of my life again. And there was no one else. So, I just kept it all to myself, as sad as that was.

  One day Adam found me and asked me if I would like to go away for a weekend.

  “Exactly how is that going to work?” I asked him in disbelief that he would even suggest it.

  Did he completely forget that he had a wife and we all lived in the same house? People would notice us both being gone at the same time. I thought that Sarah might be suspicious of us, even though she couldn’t know anything for sure. We were very discreet. At least I think we were. So, assuming that she didn’t know anything for sure, it sounded like a bad idea for both of us to be away at the exact same time.

  “I go on a lot of business trips, as you know. So that part will seem completely normal. Then I’ll just tell Sarah and Oliver that you asked me for the weekend off. I’ll say you want to go visit your parents or something. You never take time off. They can’t really argue with me about it.”

  “Won’t that look suspicious?” Sarah and Oliver were not stupid people.

  “No. I’ll tell them today about you. Then after you go into town and wait for me on Friday, I’ll tell Sarah I got called to another ranch for a meeting and will be back on Monday. It happens all the time. No one will be the wiser.” He seemed so confident.

  It seemed like he had it all worked out. “Well, okay. If you think it will work, then I’m in.”

  Adam smiled. “It will. Leave everything to me.”

  The next weekend we left without a hitch. No one seemed to suspect, or even care, for that matter. I had John drive me into town, telling him that a friend was picking me up for the weekend. It wasn’t a lie. He dropped me off at the library, where I waited for Adam. I didn’t want to go to the coffee house because I didn’t want Huck to see Adam and me together. Not that it was any of his business, but I just didn’t need the grief. So, I hid out in the library until Adam arrived a little while later.

  We had a wonderful time. We drove to the airport and flew all the way to California. I had never been on an airplane before and I loved it. I just didn’t get people who were afraid of flying. What was the big deal? I had never been to California before and it was wonderful. We saw a few of the sights, but honestly, we didn’t spend a lot of time outside our room and we loved every minute of it. We stayed at a place called The Wildflower Inn, and it was just perfect. It was right on the beach, with a cute little outdoor cafe that had a wonderful view of the water. The teenagers that worked there were running around in beach wear and flip flops. It looked like the funnest job ever. If it weren’t for Adam, I might have stayed and worked there, right at the beach.

  It was so nice to not have to sneak around. At home, we were always afraid of being caught and had to be really careful. In California, I didn’t know a soul and we could do what we wanted. I didn’t expect to get to go on trips like that often, or maybe ever again, so we just enjoyed ourselves with the little time we had. Adam spoiled me, buying me expensive meals and sight seeing trips and even some cute souvenirs. I figured I was going to have to hide them when I got back to the ranch. No one would ever believe that I just flew out to California for the weekend with a friend. It would look really suspicious to show up with souvenirs from there. I would have be careful.

  When we arrived home, separately of course, we were surprised at what we found. Violet was in the middle of planning a huge party in the ballroom. Even though I would have to work during the party, I was as excited as everyone else. According to Oliver it had been a really long time since such a huge event had taken place there, and I had never witn
essed one.

  I got thrown right into the middle of all the planning and it was so much fun. I asked Violet what the occasion was and she said it was just because she wanted to. There was no need to have another reason. Life was much too short to wait around for parties to happen. I couldn’t agree more.

  The day of the party came way too fast. We spent the entire day putting everything together in the ballroom. So much to do, but it all got done. Then everyone started arriving. Hundreds of people showed up, even some of the people that worked on the ranch. Not the house staff or the ranch hands, but people with a little more prestige, such as Teresa. As the head horse trainer, she was invited. So were a few of the people that helped Adam manage the ranch. I knew most of them, but since I wasn’t a guest, I wasn’t allowed to mingle with them. Teresa brought Huck as her guest. That was a little weird because he was invited and I wasn’t. Oh well, I guess I had my place. I had made my peace with it.

  I heard many of the guests talking about Violet and her wonderful parties. They missed coming to them. I had such a nice time just hanging out. It was a great party, one like I had never been to before. The parties I went to back home were so completely different. Everyone that went to those were there just to get high and drunk. At this party, they were there to see old friends and talk and laugh. There was still a lot of alcohol being consumed, but it was a different vibe. They weren’t all there for the sole purpose of getting drunk. I could get used to this kind of party.

  Even though I was working, and not an invited guest, I really didn’t have a lot to do. A lot of people were hired to take care of the food, music, drinks, and all that during the party. My job of helping to plan and set up was pretty much done. So, I stood there just watching people mostly, and helping out here and there when needed.