A Tale of Two Ghosts

by Sarah Riad

  His eyes dropped, and I could tell he was uncomfortable from the way he began to pull at his sleeves and folded his legs. As he sighed, I wondered if he was about to use his ‘pass’ card so soon.

  ‘Did you know that Theo is my twin?’

  My jaw dropped. ‘No. Way!’

  I couldn’t believe it. At first glance, you wouldn’t even think they were related, let alone twins.

  ‘Yeah. That’s everyone else’s reaction too.’

  As Finn’s face grew sadder, I suddenly understood why they didn’t get along. They were twins, but they couldn’t have been more different. Theo was physically fit with the kind of body you’d find on most celebrities in magazines. He also had the good looks to match and carried himself with confidence that not many could pull off. Finn was the opposite. He didn’t have the body most guys his age seemed to want, and he certainly had no confidence in himself. But he wasn’t unattractive. Instead of the strong features that Theo had, Finn had a softer look. He was boyish looking with dimples and a soft scattering of light brown freckles across his nose. His dark eyebrows always seemed to be tilted downwards, giving him his serious gaze that made his pale eyes stand out.

  ‘We got on really well until we were about thirteen years old. He suddenly became huge. It was like he was a normal kid one night and the next he was this muscly boy that everyone in school seemed to be interested in and wanted to be friends with. Meanwhile, I stayed the same and soon enough people began to compare us. They would make jokes about how different we were for twins and constantly ask me why I wasn’t more like him, as though being me wasn’t good enough.’ He trailed off as his pale face began to glow red. ‘He just didn’t understand why I was so bothered by what people said. But, of course he wouldn’t understand, no one was telling him he wasn’t good enough. Even my parents do it—especially my dad. It’s Theo did this, Theo did that, and then they look at me and I can tell they think I’m the loser, they think, ‘where did we go wrong with Finn.’’ He paused, chewing on his lip and picking at the skin around his bitten nails. ‘I can’t tell you how many times they’ve said to me, ‘why can’t you be more like Theo?’ and honestly, every time they do…’ He stopped himself, looking flushed in his cheeks but it wasn’t because of his anger, he was blushing. He felt exposed. Too exposed. ‘I know it’s silly.’

  ‘I don’t think it’s silly at all,’ I said. He gave me an appreciative smile, though I could tell he didn’t believe me at all.

  ‘What happened to your parents?’ he asked.

  I was surprised. I had expected him to ask me how I died again. I had been prepared to use my pass at the first hurdle. My mind cast back to the memories of my mum and gran, and I smiled to myself.

  ‘Sorry, is that too personal? It’s just, the only person you’ve mentioned is your gran,’ Finn said, picking at his seat as his face turned red. ‘You don’t have to answer, don’t worry.’

  ‘No, it’s fine. I just had to think for a minute, it’s been a long time since I last thought of them.’

  The truth was, I had forced myself not to think of them—especially my gran. It made being stuck in the house easier if I forgot my life from before. It was the only way I knew how to stay sane.

  ‘Well, for starters, I’m a complete cliché and have no idea who my dad was. I’m not even sure my mum did either. My mum fell pregnant really young—she was sixteen years old. My gran helped her out with me, taking care of me when my mum went off to work or to visit her friends. My gran said it was all going well, but it all changed after my seventh birthday. My mum had just turned twenty-three and had made friends with a group of people her age, I guess you’d call them hippies. They were free-living, travelling the world and my mum wanted nothing more than freedom. They gave her a taste of what life could have been like if it wasn’t for me.’ I smiled sadly as I remembered the last time I saw her. ‘She was too young to be my mum, we all knew that, and so one day she left and I never saw her again.’

  ‘I’m sorry,’ Finn whispered.

  ‘Don’t be. I was lucky enough to have my gran who took care of me like I was her own daughter.’

  ‘Was your gran still alive when you died?’ he asked as I closed my eyes, imagining her face when I never returned home that night.

  ‘Yeah,’ I said. My chest grew heavy. ‘Can we stop talking about this for now?’

  The shakiness in my voice caused him to straighten his back against the wall.

  ‘Yeah, sure,’ he said a little panicked before silence took over the room. ‘I’m sorry I made you remember.’

  ‘You say sorry a lot.’ I smiled, wishing he could see me.

  ‘Sorry,’ he said, and we both laughed gently.

  ‘It’s just bittersweet. I like remembering her but at the same time I hate that I abandoned her like my mum did.’

  ‘I mean, you didn’t exactly get a choice.’

  I shrugged my shoulders. ‘Doesn’t mean I didn’t leave her.’ I paused and sighed. ‘I just wish I had gotten the chance to say goodbye.’

  ‘I’m sorry.’ He attempted at a smile.

  ‘Yeah, me too. I think I’m going to head to the library now,’ I said, not wanting to think about it anymore.

  ‘Ok,’ he said checking his phone, causing his face to light up in the darkness. ‘It’s late anyway.’ He flashed the phone at me to show it was past 2 a.m.

  ‘Hey, Finn, before I go, can I ask you a question?’ I paused at the door, watching as he climbed under his bed covers.

  ‘Yeah?’

  ‘Why do you always have the light turned off whenever we chat?’

  He smiled. ‘It’s gonna sound dumb, but when the light’s off I tell myself that the only reason why I can’t see you is because it’s dark.’

  I smiled too. ‘Doesn’t sound dumb at all…goodnight, Finn.’

  20

  Finn

  Mum, don’t make me dinner today, I’m going out with India,’ Theo called as he rushed into the house, forcing Mum to turn off the TV.

  I watched from the kitchen table, tucking into a sandwich I had made myself.

  ‘Mummy, can I have a snack?’ Maia called. ‘Also, I have homework. Finn?’ she turned to me as I took a bite of the sandwich, ‘can you help me?’ Somehow her big brown eyes had grown twice the size.

  Mum was already off the sofa and in the kitchen before I could reply.

  ‘Firstly, Theo, I think what you meant to say was, ‘Mum, can I please go out with India?’’

  Theo rolled his eyes. ‘Mum, can I go out with India?’

  India had been the latest girl to fall for Theo, at least that was where it seemed to be heading. He had spent the last few days hidden away in his bedroom talking to her until the late hours of the evening. I had noticed her more at school since bumping into her in town. She wasn’t one of the popular girls at school. Sure, everyone knew her, but she was quiet compared to the others. She had been in most of my classes and generally kept to herself. I found it weird that she didn’t have to try and fit in with her group, she just did. I also liked that she always said hi to me, even when she was with Theo, which of course he didn’t love.

  ‘Yes, but you must be home by 10 p.m.—no excuses!’ Mum said as Theo rushed upstairs.

  ‘Maia, here,’ Mum said placing a jam sandwich on the table next to mine. ‘Tell me about this homework then.’ She sat in the chair beside me but paused for a few seconds as though she was waiting for me to move away. I didn’t.

  ‘Well, Ms Morris said we have to do a family history tree. I have to go really far back, and she said that I might be related to the Queen.’

  ‘Doubt it. We wouldn’t have to live here if we were,’ I said.

  Mum flashed me a look.

  ‘Ok sweetie that sounds easy enough seeing as your dad and I don’t exactly have the biggest of families,’ Mum said watching as Maia pushed her half-eaten sandwich to one side before she unrolled a large white piece of paper with a tree in the centre. In big capital letters said
the words Maia at the bottom of the tree. ‘Ok, so on Daddy’s side, it’s just Grandad Theodore and Nanny Eve.’ Mum watched as Maia wrote out the words with the occasional spelling help.

  ‘Grandad had a brother called Reggie,’ I said, and Mum flashed me a grateful grin. I brushed it off, feeling my cheeks heat up. ‘You know, we could look this up online on one of those ancestry websites.’

  Suddenly, excitement bolted through me causing my stomach to flip as I had an idea on how I could help AB too.

  ‘Mum, can I have some money, please? I don’t need much, just enough for a haircut,’ I whispered, racing through every word, embarrassed.

  She stood still for a moment before nodding excessively, reaching for her purse. ‘Here,’ she said and handed me way too much.

  I had shocked myself when I left the house the next morning at 9 a.m. by choice. Especially since it was a Saturday morning. Since no one else had been up, even Theo, I texted Mum to let her know I had gone out so that she didn’t think I had run away.

  I walked the route into town that I had become familiar with when walking to school. It was the best way to avoid the flurry of people making their way to work, but I also got to explore the nearby woods. There was spot about a six-minute walk in that had become my favourite. Amongst a hundred green-leaved trees sat a blossom tree. It was completely out of place, and yet somehow still belonged. The small pink petals had begun to fall in the autumn breeze and made the grass underneath it a blanket of pink, but it was even better when the sun was out. The golden rays would shine through the gaps making it almost look heavenly. It made the town and the house seem a world away when I was there in absolute silence.

  I got a text from my mum once I reached the circle of buildings that made the town.

  Ok. Have fun. If you have change from the money I gave you yesterday, could you please pick up one of those apple pies from Ms Bennett’s Bakery? Thank you. Mum Xx

  I smiled at the fact that she signed it off with ‘Mum’ as though I’d have no idea who had messaged me.

  I sped into the barber’s, relieved that it was empty except for an elderly man sweeping the floor.

  ‘Good morning,’ he said with a big grin.

  ‘Hi. Good morning…erm, I was wondering if I could get a haircut?’

  He nodded and tucked the broom into a corner before tapping on one of the three red chairs facing mirrors. ‘Good place to wonder. Sit yourself down.’

  I did as I was told and sat, looking back at my reflection. My hair really was a state.

  ‘So, what are you thinking?’ he said, smiling at me into the mirror as I looked at his reflection.

  ‘Erm…’ I had forgotten I had to actually have something in mind. I could feel my chest tighten as I grew anxious. Stupid. Who goes to the hairdresser not knowing what they want?

  I looked around the wall in front of me trying to avoid his eyes staring at me when I found a picture of a man. It was one of those model shots of a hairstyle.

  ‘Like that.’ I pointed, and he nodded.

  Twenty minutes later I walked out of the barbers feeling lighter, and a lot colder too.

  As I made a beeline for the bakery, I noticed a library on the opposite side of the circle park. I made my way over wondering if it would have any old articles that might be about the house.

  I read a plaque outside that displayed its name followed by the date I assumed it was built.

  1974

  I wondered if AB had been here when she was alive. I wondered if she had walked down these streets like I had and if it had been the same. The town didn’t look like it was a fan of too much change. I could imagine her being just as cheerful as the others and waving back whenever someone said ‘good morning’.

  ‘Hello! You’re new. Are you Jack’s son?’ I was greeted by an elderly aged woman with red glasses at the tip of her nose. I had come to realise that everyone in this town was old and knew me as Jack or Cait’s son.

  ‘Theo, isn’t it?’ She stood up from an armchair and offered me her hand to shake.

  ‘No. Finn.’ I quickly shook her hand wondering if she could feel the sweat that seemed to be pouring from my hands.

  ‘Oh, sorry, dear,’ she said. ‘I shouldn’t have assumed.’

  I shook my head and began picking at a bit of chipped paint on the counter. ‘It’s fine.’

  ‘How are you settling in the new house then? I say new house, but actually, it’s terribly old. You know, it used to be a beautiful house many years ago—the envy of the town.’ She rambled on as she walked away from the counter and busied herself sorting through the piled books behind her. ‘I hear now that your dad is going to do it all up again? Good job and all, it really was starting to bring down town morale, which is rather silly when you think about it being so out of town and nowhere near the rest of us, but I think it was just the thought of such a beautiful place being put to waste.’

  I nodded wondering when she’d ever stop talking. No wonder the library was empty.

  ‘We are quite a small little town here, so we take these things seriously. We like our town to dazzle our visitor’s eyes and warm their hearts. It’s the Newberry way.’

  I watched her lips move without a single pause for a breath.

  ‘How rude of me, I didn’t even introduce myself. I’m Sheila. Sheila James. I come from a very long line of James’ too. Some might even say it was a James that founded this little town, though I’m sure that Ms Bennett would tell you differently.’ She frowned. ‘Anyway, what brings you here? The library I mean, not the town!’ She laughed as though she had just told the funniest joke.

  I politely smiled avoiding her beading eyes.

  ‘I just thought I’d look around,’ I said, knowing full well she’d probably be able to answer all the questions about the house and AB. I also knew I’d probably never leave the library again if I were to ask.

  ‘Right, well you do that. There’s some young adult fiction on that side.’ She pointed behind me. ‘We’ve got all the books you’ll probably want but if not, let me know and we can always order it in.’

  I nodded and walked off into the direction she pointed, feeling like I had to despite not being interested in any young adult books.

  I scanned through the available books spotting those with that titles I recognised as movies. When I noticed the one I probably knew best, I wondered if AB had read anything that didn’t date before either of us had been born.

  ‘Finn,’ Sheila said, causing me to jump with a book in my hand. ‘Oh sorry, did I make you jump? Well, I just thought I would let you know that I have set you up on the system now so you can come in anytime to borrow a book. Normally, we would only let you take two books at a time, but since I know you, I’ve increased it to three.’ She eyed the book in my hand. ‘Oh, that’s a good choice for you. Have you seen all the films? I only managed to see the first two, I haven’t had the time to see the others, but my granddaughter told me they were excellent.’

  I nodded, feeling a ‘Sheila’ headache coming on.

  ‘So is it just that one you want? I think the second one is out at the moment, but I could always let you know when it arrives back.’

  Desperate for her to stop talking, I agreed and left the library with my new book on loan.

  I had gotten about halfway home when I remembered I hadn’t got mum’s pie. I debated for a second whether I should go back or just go home, picturing the moaning I’d get if I didn’t bring one home.

  I sighed out loud and made my way back the bakery, hoping it wouldn’t be packed.

  ‘Cait’s boy.’ Ms Bennett greeted me from behind her till.

  The smell of her pastries caused my stomach to growl as I eyed them up in front of me.

  ‘Finn.’ I said to remind her.

  ‘Yes. What does your mum need?’ she asked impatiently even though I was the only person in the shop.

  ‘An apple pie, please,’ I said pulling out the change in my pocket.

  ‘I just sold the
last one that was ready. Ten minutes for more, so you’ll have to wait, ok?’

  I nodded, far too scared of her to say no. I tucked myself into the corner of the shop to watch out of the window.

  ‘So, how’s the new house?’ she asked busying her hands with some sliced fruit.

  ‘Oh, it’s ok, I guess,’ I replied, hoping I wasn’t about to have a Sheila round two.

  ‘I bet it’s no fun living in a place like that. Last I heard it was a terrible mess inside.’

  She wasn’t wrong but then my mum had done her best to make inside seem more like home.

  ‘My parents are working on it.’

  She nodded. ‘Yes, well, your dad had better be, he has a year to fix that place up or it’s back to council we go. No offence to you, but I for one would be glad to see it gone. None of us thought we’d even ever see your dad around these parts again.’

  Again? I was right, my dad had been here before. I wanted to ask for more information but as I opened my mouth, a couple walked into the bakery.

  ‘Oh, what a beautiful set of newlyweds you make!’ Ms Bennett smiled.

  ‘Thank you, Ms Bennett,’ the man said with a huge grin as I remembered the picture I had taken from inside the shed.

  ‘Bennett!’ I accidentally said out loud as Ms Bennett shot me a cross look.

  ‘Boy, do you not have any manners? I am having a conversation here!’ Her dark, wire-like eyebrows scrunched up above her eyes.

  ‘Sorry,’ I whispered as she rolled her eyes and continued her conversation with the couple.

  Why had I only just realised? What did Ms Bennett have to do with my family?

  ‘Cait’s boy,’ she called, after a few minutes of me staring into the corner.

  ‘Finn,’ I said, this time without a smile as it felt like she was doing it on purpose now.

  ‘Here’s your pie. Tell your mum I’ll her set up a tab she can settle monthly,’ she said shaking her head at my offered money and turned her attention back to the couple.

  ‘Bye then,’ I said under my breath as I left the shop with the pie and book in my hands, headed for home with two questions on my mind, why was my dad lying and who was Ms Bennett?