Between Heaven and Hell

by Erin Trejo

  “What is it you want, Vitale?” Let’s get right to it then.

  “Daniel Gambino.” Saying his name makes me cringe. I’ve known this bastard since we were little, and I hated him every day of my life.

  “What about him?” Sinclair sits in his chair before leaning onto his desk.

  “What business do you have with him that I should know about?” His annoying laughter irritates me.

  “That isn’t your concern, Vitale. What is your concern is my daughter apparently,” he informs me. Shit, it isn’t as if I didn’t see this coming. I knew he would have people watching her and now that Daniel is back in the picture, it will get worse.

  “Your daughter doesn’t play a role in this, Sinclair. Nothing runs through this town without my knowledge. Gambino is a threat to that.” Sinclair watches me, gauging me.

  “Gambino has no business with me.” Look at the lies coming out of his mouth. It’s almost admirable that he would lie to me.

  “Gambino has a lot to do with you. In fact, I think you’re running a few operations behind my back.” Leaning closer to his desk I almost want him to lie again. I want a reason to slam my fists into that piece of shits face.

  “Gambino came to me with some offers,” he admits. Blowing out a breath, why does this man take me for a fool?

  “That was pretty obvious when he walked back into your daughter’s life. The question is what is he doing for you?” I see the irritated look in his eyes. He hates that I know so much about him and yet he has nothing on me. It’s a part of this life that I thrive on.

  “Why is my daughter such an imperative part of this?” Sinclair leans back in his chair, watching me for a response.

  “Every aspect of your family is imperative. I know all I need to know about them, Sinclair, just like I do anyone else in this city that holds any kind of authority.” His eyes flicker to me before glancing away.

  “She isn’t your concern, Vitale.” Gritting his teeth does nothing to scare me.

  “She is when she’s in my bed.” The fire that ignites within him amuses me. He flies out of his chair straight towards me before I stand, grabbing him around the neck. Holding him against the wall and my body, I lean in closely and growl in his ear,

  “You better watch your ass with Gambino. I can promise you that if one piece of hair is disrupted on Ava’s pretty little head, I will kill you without regard for anything or anyone, including that whore of a wife of yours.” I release him before stepping back and adjusting my jacket.

  “Nice to see you again, Sinclair.”

  Chapter 17

  Days turn to weeks. It’s all the same. Amelia goes to school and comes home heading straight to her room. I keep up with my business as usual. Nothing changes aside from me getting richer and stronger with every passing day. New territories, new money. It’s a never-ending trade off with me. I’ve kept myself on track, running on fumes. My sleep is basically nonexistent. I was given medicine by the family doctor, but I don’t take it. I need to be alert and on my game. Drugs and medicine all work the same. They paralyze a part of you. Numbing the senses that you need to make decisions instantly.

  “I thought you’d be gone by now,” I say when I spot Ava leaving Amelia’s room. It surprises me that she’s here. She’s avoided me at all costs. She shows up daily to see Amelia but makes sure she’s gone by the time I come around. I can’t say that I blame her.

  “She had a lot of homework.” Ava glides past me leaving her lingering scent as she goes. Turning on my heel, I follow behind her down the stairs before grabbing her arm.

  I spin her to face me as I watch something spark in her eye.

  “You’re upset.” I only state the obvious. I can see it all over her face.

  “I’m fine. I’m not your concern.” Chuckling, she sounds just like her father. “What’s so funny?” Crossing her arms over her chest, she glares at me.

  “You sound like your father. In fact, he said that exact same thing to me a few weeks ago.” Her arms fall as she looks up at me.

  “You talked to my father?” Nodding my head, I won’t go into detail with her. None of this is her concern.

  “We had an informal meeting,” I inform her. Narrowing her eyes on me, she wants more than I’m willing to give her. More than she will need to know.

  “About what?” Shaking my head, I take a step away from her.

  “Don’t do that, Cord. Don’t walk away from me,” she snaps before grabbing my arm. My eyes travel to hers before she licks her lips. That familiar zing floating between the two of us.

  “It was business.” That’s not entirely a lie.

  “What does business have to do with me?” Sighing, I’m in no mood to do this with her.

  “I reminded him of a deal he had with Gambino. I also reminded him that if anything were to happen to you while his deals with Gambino were going on, I’d kill him.” Her eyes dance around, anywhere but focusing on me. Her hand falls away from me before taking a step back. At the same time, I’m about to speak, I hear Amelia scream. I turn on my heal and run up the stairs, straight towards her room with my gun drawn. It’s quiet now, too quiet. I motion for Ava and the other guys that have moved into position behind me to be quiet as I slowly crack the door open. As soon as the doors open, I see Julius with his pants around his ankles.

  “Did we miss something?” I growl. Julius jumps when he hears my voice. Shuffling backwards, he holds his hands up in defeat as Amelia cries on the bed. Noting that her clothes are still intact, he hadn’t touched her as far as I know.

  “It was an accident!” he screams. Julius has the nerve to plead that with me? How ignorant does he think I truly am?

  “An accident?” Ava rushes past me and straight to Amelia. Pulling her small body into her arms, she cradles her to her chest.

  “I’m sorry Boss. It’ll never happen again.” Taking a step towards him, he watches me intently.

  “You’re sorry?”

  “It won’t happen again, Boss!” Throwing his hands up, I smile a sick smile.

  “I know that,” I say, keeping my grin in place. This is the thrill that I love. The monster that revels in the blood and danger. I raise the gun and point it at him before pulling the trigger. A thrill races through me as I watch his lifeless body fall to the floor. Ava and Amelia both scream but I just smirk. The fact that he would even think of doing something like that makes me sick. Glancing over, Ava has Amelia’s eyes covered, shielding her from this moment of reality.

  “Let her go,” I demand. Ava’s eyes come to meet mine as she shakes her head slowly. She doesn’t want her to see this? She needs to.

  “She doesn’t need to see this,” she pleads. Her hands don’t move and that pisses me off further. A piece of my insides burns with a fury that can’t be ignored.

  “She does need to see this! She needs to see that he won’t hurt her ever again!” Ava doesn’t move her hands; she just shakes her head.

  “She doesn’t need that! She’s a child, Cord!” Ava screams in protest. Slowly moving the gun, I now focus it on Ava. Her eyes widen as she takes me in.

  “Take your hands off her.” The low growl in my tone makes her move quickly.

  “You see that? You see what happens to men that mess with family, Amelia?” Her little eyes are focused on the man that lies on her floor in a puddle of his own blood.

  “You’re crossing a line, Cord!” My eyes move back to Ava’s before lowering my gun.

  “No, I’m showing you and her why I can’t love anyone! I’m showing you the side of my life that you refuse to think exists! This is me, Ava! This is who the fuck I am!” Roaring at her, I turn to Nikolai.

  “Get someone to clean this shit up.” Nodding his head, he gets on the phone. I brush past them and head towards my room with my mind in a blur. The look on Amelia’s face was torture. It was complete torture and fear. She has to understand this life though. There is no way around it. She’s a part of this world now and I need her to understand that she�
��s safe. Once I’m in my room, I drop onto the bed, running my hand through my hair when Ava storms in.

  “You are some kind of piece of shit, Cord! That poor child has had enough death and you added to it!” Ava roars like a lion. Watching the way she runs her hand through her hair does something to me, something feral.

  “She needs to see it. That’s all she’s going to see being a Vitale.” Smirking at her, I know she’s getting pissed, but this is the reality of what we are.

  “Are you insane? You killed a man in front of her!” Ava moves towards me quickly when I stand. Her hands land on my chest as she shoves me. My stance doesn’t waver at all. My eyes burn into her, ready to take her down a notch before she stops.

  “How could you ruin her like that?” she sobs. Tears stream down her cheeks before I take a step away from her.

  “You’ve been locked away in your little world, Ava. You are too blind to see what’s right in front of you. You’ve been sheltered from the real world and there is no other choice than to make Amelia see it for herself!” Snapping at her seems to work. She lowers her head.

  “You’re ruining her innocence, Cord. Just because you had yours ripped away doesn’t mean you have to tear hers away.” As much as that means to me, I can’t do it. I can’t let Amelia learn to feel.

  “She has to learn, Ava. This life holds nothing more than pain and regret. Everything she’s going to live through being a Vitale is going to ruin her. I’m just helping her on that journey.”

  Chapter 18

  Her cries pierce the silence like they do most nights. I walk into the hallway knowing that I can’t comfort her. I don’t know how. Instead I stand outside her door with my forehead pressed against it. So many nights I’ve thought about going in there, holding her. But in the end, what good would it do her? This world is a rough and unstable place to grow up. The faster Amelia learns that, the better off she’ll be. Do I hate that she lost her mother and came into this hell? Of course I do, but what can I do about it now? She’s here, she’s family. As much as I wished I could love her as family, I can’t. I don’t know how.

  I lean my head against the door much like I’ve done every other night. Its times like this I wonder what life would have been like had my mother not died. Would she have left my father? The life she knew? There are nights when I feel like I can hear her voice whispering in my ear.

  “Don’t do this to them. Be a better man than your father.” Over and over, the mantra repeats.

  But I’m not better than him. I never have been and for the foreseeable future, I won’t be.

  My life doesn’t allow any kind of wiggle room where emotions are concerned. Amelia’s door opens as I take a step back. I come face to face with Ava. Her bright blue eyes glisten with tears.

  “What are you doing here?” I ask her. Looking at her, she looks like she’s aged in the past few weeks and not in a good way.

  “I stay with her sometimes.” I’m taken aback by her admission. She stays here and I didn’t know it? Or was I just too damn stubborn to see it? Nodding my head, I turn to walk away when she stops me.

  “She needs someone,” she says behind me. Lowering my head, I don’t turn to look at her.

  “She has Antonio. I made sure that shit would never happen to her again.” Ava’s in front of me in seconds. Her eyes pleading with me. “Don’t do that. Don’t look at me like that!” I roar as I point at her.

  “She needs her brother! She needs to be loved!” I know what she needs. I just know that I can provide that.

  “I can’t love her, Ava. Don’t you understand that?” Screaming at the top of my lungs, she jolts back.

  “I hate you, Cord. I hate everything about you!” Her words should hurt me, but they don’t. Instead they make me smile.

  “Don’t let hate rule you, sweetheart. It’s a dark place to live.” She won’t look at me and I can’t blame her. I reach for her, lifting her chin so she has to look at me. “I warned you, Ava. I warned you that once I got ahold of you my darkness would overtake you. You made that choice each time you came back to my bed.” The pure rage that eats at her is visible. I can see it within all her depths.

  “And yet here I am walking away,” she says almost sounding sure of herself. Ava takes a step back away from my hand before she turns and walks away. I watch her as she makes her way down the hallway, so confident and full of herself.

  “She’ll be back,” I whisper to myself.

  Chapter 19

  “Where the hell is my shipment?” I roar at the top of my lungs aiming my gun at the asshole in front of me on his knees.

  “I don’t know, Cord. Last I heard the Gambino family was in that area! I swear to you!” Eyeing Marco, I want to blow his brains all over the wall behind him. I’m slowly falling into a pattern, a routine of killing, and I can’t say that I’m sad about that.

  “Gambino. I’m so fucking tired of hearing that name.” Jordy drags Marco’s wife into the warehouse. His eyes dart to hers before coming back to me. Jordy shoves her to the floor before I aim the gun at her.

  “No, Cord. Please. I’ll find the shipment!” Chuckling at that, I scrub my hand across my face. Looking between the two of them, I laugh as I pull the trigger. His wife drops to the ground as Marco howls. His pain could be felt if only I had feelings.

  “I think that should be incentive enough. If I don’t see my shipment tomorrow, your daughter will be next,” I warn him. Marco’s teary eyes dart to mine as I grin.

  “Don’t test my patience, Marco. I have no feelings; I don’t care what happens to that little family of yours.” I find it funny that men will look you in the eye as if you can feel what they feel. I don’t care what they feel. I turn on my heel heading towards the door when Marco speaks.

  “I won’t do it.” I dead stop. Did he just say that he wouldn’t do it? My eyes meet Nikolai’s. The smirk on his face is clearly evident. The corner of my lip slowly curls into a smile as I look over my shoulder and ask, “Did you just tell me you wouldn’t do it?” Slowly turning to look Marco in the eyes, he pushes himself up. He stands there, back straightened. It’s almost admirable that he has the guts to stand up to me. I walk towards him with a purpose. I cock my head to the side as I take him in. What kind of fool is he? Did he think that if he stood up to me that I would allow him some leeway? Did he think I’d respect him?

  “Is that the way you want this to go?” I ask him. Marco swallows hard before nodding his head.

  “You killed her. You won’t touch my kid.” The laugh that escapes me is hysterical. I slide my phone out of my pocket. Hitting the speed dial, I listen as Malcom answers.

  “Kill the kid,” I say. With those three words, I turn on speaker phone. Three shots ring through the speaker as Marco’s eyes widen. Pressing the end button, I aim the gun at his head.

  “Go join them.” Pulling the trigger, I watch his lifeless body fall to the ground in front of me. “Worthless fuck.” Kicking his foot, I turn to walk out.

  “Get this cleaned up.” Nikolai nods before he pulls his phone from his pocket. I step outside into the cool air and glance at the sky. The sun is setting, and I seem to keep finding myself thinking of Ava. I can’t get her out of my head and the more I think of her, the more I become pissed off. Something about her tries my patience but she also ignites a spark in me. She’s magnetic and something I had gotten used to. That was my own fault. I knew better than to let her close. I did anyway. I messed up and that is no one’s fault but my own. I shake my head and sigh, running my hand through my hair when Nikolai comes out.

  “The crew will be here soon,” he says. I nod my head. “What are you thinking?”

  “I don’t know anymore, Nikolai. Have you ever felt like you were falling into a hole that you’re not sure you can make it back out of?”

  “More times than I care to admit. May I be blunt here?” he asks, and I chuckle.

  “When are you not?”

  “This is very true. Cordae, you are one of the young
est to become Boss of a family. You were groomed for this, yes, but that doesn’t mean you were ready. In all due respect, I think your uncle would be proud of the man you’ve become. You hold your family on a pedestal, never letting anyone harm them. You handle business the way it was intended, and you never let anyone take you down. I must say, I respect you for that.”

  Chapter 20

  Time keeps moving. Life keeps going. Nothing ever stays the same except my lifeless heart. The minute’s tick by every single day with no regard to the world around it. I sit back and watch as my demise comes closer and closer. It’s inevitable. It’s coming. There is no stopping it or slowing it. I see why people say live your life to the fullest but that doesn’t work for me. My life is always full. It’s full of chaos and death. I don’t think there has ever been a time that I’ve felt calm enough to breathe freely. Rubbing my temples, I lean my elbows on the desk in front of me. Headaches have become my new normal. A knock on the door pulls me away from the throbbing.

  “Entrare.” Nikolai walks in with Amelia at his side. That’s never a good sign. I look between the two of them before Nikolai speaks.

  “It seems the little Vitale has found herself in trouble at school.” Shaking my head, I don’t know why this requires my attention.

  “And?” I ask as Amelia smirks. The way her eyes sparkle as she looks around the room, I’m almost proud of her. She is truly becoming a Vitale.

  “It was bullshit!” she yells. Her mouth has me raising an eyebrow. Waving Nikolai out of the room, I stand and move slowly towards her. I take her in, watch her expressions. She isn’t faltering at all. A small grin wraps itself around my face.

  “It was bullshit, was it?” Amelia’s eyes come to meet mine as she shrugs. Damn it, I can see so much of my younger self in this girl. I don’t know if that’s a good thing or not.