Winter of Faith Collection

by Rachel Stoltzfus

  “I hope Anna makes it home in time!” she muttered to herself.

  Sarah, hearing her, nodded. “I do, too. Do what you can on your quilting because you’ll need to light the lanterns once this storm hits.”

  As windy as it was, it still took another forty-five minutes for the clouds to release their heavy burden of rain on the land. Instead of coming in after finishing his carpentry work, Joseph stayed in the barn, tending to the livestock and handling the milking, along with the Amish boy he had hired several months earlier.

  Once the outside chores were done, he brought the boy in with him.

  “Abram will stay here until the worst of the storm is over, then I will take him home,” he told Sarah.

  “Abram, welcome to our home. Enjoy some supper until the storm eases,” Sarah directed the young teen boy.

  “Denki. This storm threatened, but I didn’t want to leave Mr. Beiler without help,” he said.

  “Ya, and I appreciate that. Dig in! There’s plenty of food,” he ordered.

  Abram was happy to comply – his appetite was no different from any other teen boy his age.

  After supper, the storm finally abated, allowing Joseph to take him home. Sarah and Miriam did the dishes and cleaned up the kitchen and Miriam finished the quilt for her wealthy Englischer clients.

  Coming to the kitchen, she smiled and announced, “Mamm, my green-on-green quilt is done!” She poured herself some lemonade and sat down with her mother.

  Sarah grinned, rejoicing with Miriam. “Good! Do you plan to start another one tomorrow?”

  “Nee. I want to help you with the housework and give myself a day’s break. I’ll be fresher for a day’s break,” Miriam said decisively.

  Sarah smiled in approval. “Good. I will welcome your help. We need to make a dessert and bread for Sunday’s meeting. You will have a two-day break because Sunday is a day of contemplation and rest,” she reminded Miriam.

  “Ya, I know. Because I normally quilt on Saturdays, I counted only tomorrow as a break day. It will do me good!” Miriam exulted as she stretched. She and Sarah read the Bible before going to bed.

  The following day, Miriam and Sarah baked, then cleaned the kitchen so they would not need to do very much work on Sunday. In the evening, John Fisher drove by to visit with Miriam. They chose to stay inside the house, where it was cooler and less humid. Drinking lemonade and eating oatmeal raisin cookies, they chatted and laughed in the kitchen as Sarah and Joseph chaperoned in the living room.

  “What has your daed told you about having to testify against Mr. Lance Newman?” John asked, cocking his head in curiosity.

  “I will go to the next hearing sadly, and for every other hearing, ya, I do have to go,” Miriam said with a deep sigh. “I really don’t want to, but if it means he can’t get out, I will. God will give me the strength I need.”

  “He will. If I can, I’ll go with you. Just ask me and I’ll let you know if I can,” John offered.

  “Don’t you need to be at the hearings?” Miriam asked, confused.

  “Only the criminal trial,” said John.

  After John had left, Miriam was about to go upstairs. Instead, Joseph called her to the door.

  “Miriam, you have company!”

  Miriam stopped, confused. Had John come back for some reason? Running lightly back downstairs, she saw Esther Zook at the front door.

  She waved. “Esther! How are you?” What was she doing here?

  “I’m fine – I just have a question for you. I have been quilting for several years now, but I am not as good as you. I want to start selling my quilts, but I’ve been told that I need to work on my technique. Will you teach me?”

  Miriam felt a sense of warmth, a gentle pride that her skills were enough for someone else to ask for her guidance and instruction. “I’ll be happy to! I plan to start on a new quilt for a customer on Monday morning, if you want to come by then,” Miriam said.

  “Ya, that’s good. What time?” Esther asked, wringing her slender fingers.

  “After breakfast. If you could be here by eight in the morning, we’ll get started from scratch. I’ve already cut out the quilt pieces and hemmed them I’ll start sewing them . . .”

  “You hem your quilt pieces? You mean each individual small shape?” Esther asked with surprise in her voice.

  “Ya. You don’t?”

  “Nee. Maybe that’s my problem . . . Okay, I’ll be here. Should I bring some of my own work?”

  “It would be helpful so I could see it, ya, if you would,” Miriam decided.

  CHAPTER THREE

  The next morning dawned sunny, hot and still. After taking care of the livestock and eating breakfast, the Beilers left for the meeting, which was being held at the Fisher home.

  In the barn, Miriam settled with Anna and her friends on the women’s side of the barn. Looking over, she saw John gazing at her with a smile on his face. She smiled back, then grew confused when the smile faded. She put one hand out on the bench to support herself when she was unexpectedly jostled.

  “I’m sorry, Miriam! I . . . tripped,” Esther said, nervousness in her voice.

  “It’s okay. I’m just glad you didn’t fall,” Miriam said, wondering why Esther was so nervous.

  Esther quickly settled herself right next to Miriam, smoothing her dress and smoothing her hair under her kapp. As she did, her gaze settled on John.

  Miriam, seeing this, looked at Esther, then at John. She saw that John was focusing his attention on the front of the barn as he waited for the deacons and bishop to start the service. Feeling a nudge on her ribs from Anna, Miriam turned her attention to her.

  Anna leaned over to Miriam, gesturing for her to scoot over slightly.

  Miriam did so, leaning over toward her friend.

  “She’s sitting by you so that, in case John turns to look at you, she can try to distract him,” Anna whispered.

  “What? No! Everyone knows John and I are courting!” Miriam whispered back.

  “You do know that Esther doesn’t like the Ordnung, right?”

  Miriam nodded. “Ya. Everyone knows that . . . she’s probably going to leave us. That’s what everyone says. Oh, they’re getting started,” Miriam straightened and faced forward.

  Three hours later, Anna and Miriam, followed by the other women and girls, went into the Fisher kitchen to start serving the lunch. When their eating shift finally started, Anna indicated a bench at the far end for her and Miriam. The two friends scooted in next to their friends, filling the bench up and making it impossible for Esther to join them.

  “Okay. Esther Zook likes John. She wants him to court her instead of you,” Anna said bluntly.

  Miriam was stunned. She stammered as she tried to organize her thoughts.

  “But . . . but he’s . . .” she managed to say.

  “ . . . Courting you. If you’ve made true promises– and please don’t say anything – nobody knows this, including Esther. She has never liked following the Ordnung.”

  “I know!” Miriam exclaimed, and then lowering her voice to a whisper added, “That’s why it doesn’t make any sense she’d wish to court with John. I don’t really know why she’s not working to save money and move to the city, so she can live an English life.”

  “She doesn’t want an English life. She just wants things to be easy. Esther’s always been lazy. Remember in school, when she would write her sums on her wrist and peek at them when the teacher gave us quizzes?”

  Reluctantly, Miriam nodded. Esther had given it up when a couple of the older students had spoken with Mrs. Stoltzfus, but she’d never truly been shamed.

  “Esther would rather pick and choose the parts that get her what she thinks she wants. She likes John. She’s not married yet and neither is he. In her mind, that means she can make him aware of her.”

  “But—“ What if John liked Esther too? What if he decided Miriam was too much trouble with the trial and the fact that she was determined to make a success of her ow
n business. Not that she didn’t want to be a good wife to him – she desperately wanted that, but she also didn’t lie to herself and pretend that her quilting wasn’t important. She got lost in her work, and the sheer act of creation delighted her.

  “Don’t look at me so sad sack,” Anna said. “You have nothing to worry about. John cares about you.”

  Miriam sat on the bench, trying to take in everything Anna had just said. As she did, she ate slowly, not feeling very hungry.

  “Esther came by yesterday, asking me to help her with her quilting. I said I would,” Miriam said.

  “We; she needs the instruction. Go ahead and do it because you’re the best, other than old Mrs. Lapp,” Anna said. “Just...be careful okay?”

  Seemed like everyone wanted to tell her that these days. Miriam wondered what she’d done to make her life so dangerous.

  And what she could do to make things as they were, when she’d been happy.

  ***

  At her own table, Esther chatted quietly with her friends about John and her efforts to get his attention.

  “Esther, he’s courting Miriam Beiler,” Rebecca Miller, her best friend, said. “They’re both receiving instruction from the Bishop for their kneeling vows, so it’s only a matter of time until they publish their intent to marry each other. You’d better stop.”

  “They haven’t published any intentions yet. And if he’s really in love with Miriam, nothing I do will change his mind.” But if he wasn’t, if he was only courting with Miriam out of convenience or pity for her situation, that made him available. She’d only be helping the pair of them to break them up.

  “I don’t like this, Es,” Rebecca said. “Seems like a sin.”

  “I’m doing them both a favor,” Esther said. “I’ll be the fire through which they test their bond. First Corinthians 3:13: Every man's work shall be made manifest: for the day shall declare it, because it shall be revealed by fire; and the fire shall try every man's work of what sort it is.”

  “I don’t think that’s what it means.”

  “Stop worrying. It will all work out. Now, tell me, is there anyone you’re interested in courting with...”

  ***

  After the adults and younger children had all left the Fisher farm, the youth returned to the barns for the singing. Miriam and John sat at the same table on different benches. Miriam giggled as one of the boys shouted out the name of a well-known hymn, which everyone began singing. She was jostled once again as Esther slid in next to her. Now that she was aware of Esther’s interest in John, she paid closer attention to the other young woman.

  Esther, sitting across the table from John, gazed at him and smiled. “I love this song. And you sing it very well,” she said, fiddling with a curl of hair that that she’d allowed to artfully slip from beneath her prayer kapp.

  “Denki,” John said, averting his gaze. He didn’t like how Esther was sitting, though there was nothing overtly suggestive about any one thing she was doing. She leaned her forearm on the table, the position subtly calling attention to her chest, and when she spoke, she stared at him a second too long, fluttering her lashes in a way that was almost flirtatious.

  No, it was ridiculous. Everyone knew he and Miriam were courting.

  Miriam scooted over as Esther came ever closer and closer to her side.

  “Did you get caught out in that storm on Thursday?”

  John shook his head. “Nee, I was working in the shop.”

  “You’re so lucky. I was hanging clothes, and I guess I got lost in it because the heavens just opened up on me. I was soaking wet. My mamm said it was...” Esther lowered her voice, gazing up at John, “sinful the way my dress was clinging, and had me come inside immediately.”

  John’s eyes widened fractionally, and Esther smiled. She had his attention. But before she could follow up, Miriam elbowed her, a bit sharply, in the side and said, “Your friend is calling you.”

  Esther looked at where Miriam had gestured, and Rebecca was waving her over. A wave of fury washed through her, brief and a bit shameful. Esther took a breath. It wouldn’t do to let her temper get out of hand. When she had collected herself, she smiled and said, “Denki, Miriam.”

  Actually, it was better that she was leaving now. Better to give John a hint of what he might have with her, rather than offering too much. Rebecca had done Esther a favor, in a way.

  Now, she only had to see what the other girl wanted.

  ***

  Once Esther had left, Anna quickly scooted over to Miriam’s other side. Several other friends rearranged themselves so that the girls’ side of the bench was completely full. After a couple of songs, Esther returned.

  She looked at Anna, “That was my spot.”

  “You left.”

  “Hmmmph.”

  It didn’t look like any of Miriam’s other friends were planning to get up either. Esther nodded, and gathering as much dignity as she could manage, returned to Rebecca’s side. At least Rebecca was a true friend. And John liked her. Esther could tell.

  The rest of them could go hang.

  CHAPTER FOUR

  The next day, Samuel and John were finishing their work in the fields. They paused to take long gulps of cool water and pour it over their heads and necks. Shortly after they had resumed working, Samuel looked up in puzzlement. He saw Esther Zook as she approached the farm.

  Esther sat straight in the buggy, maintaining a cool, sober expression. Stopping the horse, she gave John a sweet, shy smile as he continued pulling weeds out of the earth.

  John stopped his weed-pulling, confused and more than a little upset – he and Samuel were on a tight schedule for finishing the weeding. As he looked at Esther, he saw her wearing her meeting dress and newest prayer kapp. As she approached him with several questions, he closed his eyes and groaned inwardly, remembering that his parents would expect him to treat her politely.

  Esther smiled a lot as she talked to John. It was annoying the fact that she seemed to either not know or not care that he and Miriam were courting with each other.

  “John, what’s your favorite childhood memory? What were you doing? Who were you with?” she asked him, one right after the other.

  Putting one gloved hand up to stop Esther, John shook his head.

  “Wait a minute. I think you’re confused here – I’m courting Miriam Beiler, and I have been for several months. I am not available to spend time with any other young women. Nor do I want to,” John said firmly.

  Esther stopped cold. Her face grew hot, and she lowered her eyes. “Do you . . . do you like me?” she asked.

  John, blindsided by the unexpected question, answered, but not in a way she expected or liked.

  “I cannot answer that question because I am courting Miriam Beiler,” he said through clenched teeth.

  Twenty minutes later, Miriam responded to several sharp raps on the front door. She had just finished piecing the quilt pieces together for the primary colors quilt for the little Englischer boy. Along with that day’s work and the instruction she had given to Esther Zook, she felt she had done a good day’s work.

  “Esther! Do you want some more . . .”

  “You aren’t being fair! I like John Fisher and I want to get to know him better! Let him spend time with me!” Esther shrieked.

  Miriam, not expecting this, took several seconds to respond.

  “Esther, yes, we are courting. We have been for several months. Beyond that, I cannot say anything. You know what the Ordung allows to courting couples. We are able to meet and visit under supervision; at singings, we spend time with each other in accordance with what the Ordnung allows us to . . .”

  “You’re not being fair! All I want is to be friends with John Fisher!” Miriam screamed.

  “Esther, when we were kids . . . before we became teenagers, we could spend time with boys in the district.” Miriam spoke quickly so she could get her words out before Esther’s next outburst. “When we became courting age, that had to stop,
as it should. Beyond courting, male-female friendships are no longer allowed, and you know this!”

  “Even the Englischers allow teens and young people to have opposite-sex friendships with each other!” Esther shouted.

  Sarah, passing by, stopped at the front door.

  “Esther, unless you want to find yourself in trouble with the deacons and bishop, you’ll follow the Ordnung,” she said sternly. “John cannot interact with you now that he is of courting age –and courting Miriam.”

  “You refuse to listen to me, Miriam. I am not coming back for any more quilting lessons,” she said quietly. As she finished speaking, she turned around and stalked away and down the porch back to her buggy.

  “Mamm?” she asked in confusion. “What just happened?”

  “She does not like the restrictions the Ordnung imposes upon her. Come daughter, let us get supper ready,” Sarah said, turning and walking into the kitchen.

  After supper, John came to the house. Again, because of the heat outdoors, they chose to visit inside the living room.

  “John, Esther Zook came by today, very upset – because of you. She seems to think that, despite our courting, she can have a friendship with you – or expect you to court her.”

  “Ya,” John said with a troubled sigh. “My daed and I were weeding in the fields when she drove up. She was wearing her meeting dress and prayer kapp. She started asking me ‘getting to know you’ questions and I told her that I can’t spend time with her. I am very confused about this. I reminded her that we are courting.”

  “I didn’t say anything about our being engaged because we haven’t published it yet,” Miriam said as she looked at John with worry.

  “Nee, I didn’t either. I wonder if we should tell her privately so she understands just what she is doing . . .” John broke off and ran his hand through his dark hair, frustrated.

  “Nee, I don’t think that’s necessary, John. I don’t want to violate any of the Ordnung . . .” Miriam broke off as Sarah walked past.