One Summer in Santorini

by Sandy Barker

  ‘For you?’ she asked him. Either the girl was a comedian, or she was so used to living on an island predominantly populated by gay men that it was not an unusual request for a guy.

  Josh laughed. ‘No, no, for my …’ And then he paused mid-thought and looked at me as if to say, ‘my what?’ Then he recovered with: ‘friend.’ Wonderful. It wasn’t that I thought he should refer to me as his girlfriend or anything, but perhaps ‘lover’? ‘Friend’ would have been fine too if he hadn’t got stuck deciding what label to put on us.

  I pretended none of it mattered and smiled my best smile at the pretty Greek girl. Josh’s charm must have worked on her, because she had put down her iPhone, and had even come around to the other side of the counter!

  She looked me up and down, scrutinising me. Had we been in another context – let’s say, a nightclub – and she had looked at me with that critical look on her face, I probably would have bitch-slapped her. That is, if I’d had a few drinks and she had called me a ‘fat cow’ or something. I am not a woman who goes around bitch-slapping willy-nilly.

  ‘You have a great body,’ she declared when the scrutiny was over. Ohhh, so not about to call me a ‘fat cow’. I decided not to bitch-slap her and to take it as a compliment. I noticed Josh nodding in agreement, which I also took as a compliment.

  She began pulling stuff off the racks, piling them up across one of her arms. ‘This – and this. Oh, and this.’ When it looked like her tiny, stick arm couldn’t bear to hold another item of clothing, she tipped her head at me as if to say, ‘Come.’

  I followed her to the back of the shop where there was a small makeshift changing room with a full-length mirror. When I caught sight of myself, I was a little taken aback. I had a glow about me that said, ‘sun-kissed and recently shagged.’ I looked pretty, if I’m completely honest – and apparently, I also had a great body, as assessed by a fashion professional and my new lover.

  ‘Try these,’ she commanded, pulling the curtain across tautly. I barely knew where to begin, but I decided on the dress. It was long and made of the type of cotton that’s all crinkly and hugs to you.

  There were slits up both sides, it was all the colours of a sunset, and it looked as though the fabric had been hand-dyed. Maybe it had.

  I shimmied out of my boat-soiled shorts and top and stepped into the dress. When I pulled it up my body, I realised I would need to go braless, because it only had tiny spaghetti straps to hold it up. I wiggled out of my bra and pulled the thin straps over my shoulders.

  ‘Wow,’ I whispered to myself. I could barely stand how beautifully it hugged my curves or how much the colours flattered my skin and hair.

  ‘Well?’ called an impatient Josh. ‘Have you got something on yet?’

  I composed myself and drew back the curtain.

  ‘This,’ I said, simply.

  Josh’s mouth dropped open and he stood in absolute silence taking me in. I smiled at him, then looked at the salesgirl. She nodded, and I think I saw a satisfied smile creep across her face, as though she knew it would be the perfect dress for me.

  Finally, Josh spoke. ‘We’ll take it.’

  I didn’t even try on the other clothes. There was nothing that could have come close to that dress, so I couldn’t bring myself to do it. It would have been anticlimactic. When a man is speechless at the sight of you – well, let’s just say, that’s the dress.

  He even insisted that he buy it as a gift. I argued – wholeheartedly and for a good twenty seconds – until he handed his credit card to the salesgirl over my shoulder and she ran it before I could snatch it back.

  We were going to make quite the splash at dinner.

  *

  We were late, but we had a good reason. We’d spent the rest of the afternoon shagging. Less than fifteen minutes before we were due at dinner, we dragged ourselves out of bed and donned our new outfits. I twisted my bed-hair up into what I hoped was a sexy up-do, but more likely it said, ‘I have been royally had – and many times over.’ I slicked on some lip gloss and we were out the door.

  We arrived at the restaurant, a ten-minute walk from our hotel on the outskirts of town, to a series of hellos and what I suspected were knowing looks. Duncan had booked the back room and not only was our little group there, but so was the group from the other boat. Oh joy.

  I made a beeline for Hannah, who was crooking her little finger at me. I figured I might as well get it over with. ‘You little minx, you.’ She didn’t wait for a reply. ‘Have you spent the whole day fucking, or what?’

  It didn’t matter what I said, my immediate blushing said it all. Still, I tried to appease her obnoxiously voracious appetite for gossip with a weak response of, ‘No, we also went shopping.’ I pointed to my dress as evidence. She rolled her eyes at me and pulled me into a corner.

  ‘Tell me everything.’

  ‘No!’ I snatched my hand back. ‘I didn’t ask you to tell me everything each time you stayed out all night.’

  She waved away my comment like it was a mosquito. ‘So what? This is different.’

  ‘How is this different?’

  ‘Because it’s Josh.’ That made no sense at all.

  ‘That’s exactly why I am not saying anything. It’s Josh. And you should know better than anyone what that means to me. It’s not just a bunch of lurid details to share with my roommate.’

  ‘So, now I’m just your ‘roommate’?’ It was my turn to roll my eyes at her. ‘Whatever – I don’t care about that. At least tell me if it was good.’

  ‘It was good,’ I said plainly.

  She reacted with far more glee than, A) I thought possible for Hannah to display, and B) than seemed to be appropriate for anyone to display at hearing that Josh and I had hooked up. I shook my head and pushed past her just in time to see Josh standing across the room with Kiersten. And she had her stupid little ugly hands wrapped around Josh’s biceps. And(!) she was whispering to him. Worse yet, he was smiling. My temperature spiked and I could almost hear the steam coming out of my ears.

  The sound of my mobile ringing from inside my handbag called me back from the brink. I couldn’t even remember the last time I’d used it, and here it was ringing at a particularly inopportune time. I dug around inside my bag, pulled it out, and answered without looking at the screen. I don’t know who I expected. My sister, I guess. She was the only one who had cause to call me right then. Maybe she wanted to confirm what time my flight got in.

  ‘Hello?’ I said, a slight edge in my voice.

  ‘Sarah. I’m glad I finally get to hear your voice again.’

  Shit. It was the silver fox – calling me right when I was in the middle of a jealous rage. I couldn’t believe the irony. I walked straight back into the corner which, mercifully, Hannah had already vacated, and somehow I found my voice – my pleasant voice. ‘Hello, James. How are you?’

  ‘I’m brilliant. And you?’ I looked over at Josh and the pretty little redhead, and felt my stomach tighten again. Then I turned my back on them and mustered as much attention for my caller as I could.

  ‘Just lovely, James. Greek Island life agrees with me I think.’ I sounded far breezier and more sophisticated than I was. He chuckled. Of course, he was a man who could pull off a chuckle.

  ‘I can imagine,’ he replied. ‘By my reckoning, you finish your trip tomorrow and are heading back to London, yes?’ Oh dear.

  ‘Yes.’ I am one hundred per cent sure it came out as a squeak.

  ‘Wonderful. I really hope you’ll consider seeing me. I’d love to show you my London, if you’ll let me.’ James’s London. No doubt it was splendid and fancy and extravagant – all the things I was not, but had often longed to be.

  And then I heard myself say something that surprised the hell out of me. ‘I’d love to.’

  ‘Excellent. Well, I shall let you get back to it. It sounds like a bit of a party is going on.’

  ‘Yes. Our farewell dinner.’

  ‘Enjoy then. I’ll speak to you whe
n you get back from the continent.’

  ‘Okay.’

  ‘Goodbye, Sarah.’

  ‘Bye, James.’

  The call ended while the phone was still pressed against my ear. I dropped it in my handbag and turned back to the room. Josh saw me and headed over, leaving Kiersten mid-sentence and talking to his back. She looked pissed off. Good.

  ‘Hey,’ he said, approaching me with a gentle smile.

  ‘Hey,’ I replied, donning a fake smile. I had just agreed to see James in London – and James was seriously serious about me.

  ‘Everything okay?’

  ‘Sure. Why?’ Stalling. I was stalling. I couldn’t parse the conversation I’d just had with James, and I was already in the middle of another one.

  ‘Just that you look a little, I don’t know … Did that call upset you?’

  I recovered myself and properly joined the conversation I was having with Josh. ‘No, no. It was nothing. Just my sister. She can’t pick me up from the airport anymore, so I’ll take a taxi.’ Good lie, Sarah.

  ‘Oh, that’s a bummer.’

  ‘No, it’s fine really. It doesn’t cost very much from the airport to her flat.’ Okay, now I was rambling on about nothing and lying – it was an absolute fortune from Heathrow to my sister’s flat, but Josh didn’t know that.

  I suddenly remembered the redhead.

  ‘What about you?’ I signalled over his shoulder to where Kiersten was standing, glaring at me. ‘What was that all about?’

  He laughed. ‘Oh, she wanted us to cut out early and go back to her hotel.’ My eyes must have doubled in size. ‘That’s what I thought,’ he said. ‘She was even getting a little touchy-feely.’

  ‘I noticed,’ I said, unable to stop a mid-sized pout from settling onto my face. Sarah Parsons! What right do you have to be jealous after that phone call?

  ‘I know you noticed, and I want to be clear that I am not interested in Kiersten. I told her no, because I am with you.’

  ‘You did?’

  ‘Yes. Of course I did. What did you think? That we’d spend the day together – in bed – and then I’d drop you for the first cute girl who comes along?’

  ‘You think she’s cute?’ Oh boy, I was pathetic.

  He laughed again, but this time I suspected it was at my expense rather than Kiersten’s. ‘Yes, she is cute. You know she is. But you …’ he lingered on the word ‘… are beautiful, and sexy and so desirable that I don’t even want to stay for dinner anymore.’ As he spoke, he stepped closer and took me into his arms, and by the time he’d finished speaking, he was in the perfect position to kiss me. Which he did – in front of everyone.

  When he pulled away, there was more confidence in his eyes than I had ever seen – as though it was his hidden superpower, and I had unleashed it and it kept growing stronger. It was wildly attractive. When he winked at me, I was breathless.

  The kiss was great, but what I loved most was Josh claiming me as his in front of our floating family and our floating neighbours. And Kiersten, the redheaded hussy. I looked her way, and she gave me a look that could dissolve granite. I smiled at her smugly until she looked away.

  Josh grabbed my hand and pulled me towards the long table. There were two free seats next to each other between Gary and Marie, and Duncan and Gerry, with Hannah across the table. Marie caught my eye as I sat down, and she smiled at me with raised eyebrows. I shrugged as if to say, ‘What are you gonna do?’

  Duncan, our host until the end, had pre-ordered a banquet-style dinner and the food started arriving soon after we sat down, quickly filling up the long table. Platters were passed, bad Greek wine was poured, and stories were told, mostly by Duncan who was as good a raconteur as he was a skipper.

  An hour or so into the meal, I sat back in my chair. I was stuffed, but the food was so good I kept convincing myself I could handle just one more bite. The only problem was, I’d done that about a dozen times already. I looked down to the end of the table where Kiersten was making moves on the other boat’s skipper.

  Had Hannah noticed? Across the table, I could see her throwing eye daggers at Kiersten. Good grief! We’d created a soap opera’s worth of intrigue amongst our two boats. I whispered to her, ‘You know, she was hitting on Josh only an hour ago. If you want, I’ll bash her for you?’

  She stared glumly at her plate and stabbed a piece of souvlaki with her fork. ‘He’s not worth it. He’s a pretty lousy lay, actually.’ That’s not what she’d said about him when I’d caught her sneaking back onto our boat a couple of days before, but I went along with it.

  ‘Well, then good riddance. And if he’s interested in that walking mattress, more fool him.’

  ‘Right,’ she agreed, forking the souvlaki into her mouth.

  I felt a tap on my shoulder. It was Marie. ‘Hi.’

  ‘Hi.’

  ‘So, I wondered when you’re going to Chicago.’

  I choked on my retsina, spluttering ungracefully. The crappy Greek wine went up my nose and stung the inside of my head. ‘Chicago?’ I managed to choke out after coughing a few more times. My neck snapped to the left and I saw Josh deep in conversation with Duncan. Thank Zeus for that.

  I turned to Marie and she nodded as though we were having the most normal conversation in the world. ‘Well, I mean you and Josh are obviously together …’ She looked at me, as if to encourage me to agree. I feared that if the wind changed at that very moment, the deep crease of confusion on my forehead would stay there forever.

  ‘Chicago?’ I asked again, incredulously. It had been hours since I’d thought about the real world, and when it came to Josh, I certainly hadn’t thought as far ahead as going to Chicago. I’d thought about London, about James, going back to Sydney. But not Chicago. Chicago was Josh in the real world, and I’d spent exactly zero minutes thinking about that – until then.

  I shook my head. Another time when my thoughts were fuzzy and I actually shook my head to clear them up. I was becoming a cartoon character.

  ‘Uh, no. I mean, yes, for now, for the trip, we’re together. I guess. But no.’ Okay, Sarah. That was a little too emphatic. I could tell it was, because Marie suddenly looked like she’d sucked on a lemon. ‘I mean, we hardly know each other.’ She looked even more horrified at that. I had to back-pedal. And fast. All while the person I was talking about was sitting on the other side of me.

  ‘I have to go to the ladies’ room,’ I said, a lot louder than the rest of my conversation with Marie. As I stood up, I gave her a pointed look, which – thank goodness – she figured out. She stood up and retrieved her handbag from under her chair.

  ‘I’ll come with you.’ It was quite the performance from the two of us, considering that neither her husband, nor my lover – even looked up from their conversations as we left the table.

  Marie led the way across the room, through the door and down the hallway to the bathroom. I followed, and as soon as the door closed behind me, I let out a sigh.

  And in that grimy toilet of a Greek Island taverna, Marie gave me a look that combined amusement, understanding and more than a handful of pity. Not even knowing what I wanted to say, I started to speak. I would have tried anything to make that look go away, because it was making me feel awful. But she cut me off.

  ‘Sarah, wait. Let me say this.’ I sighed again, but I shut my mouth. ‘We’ve only known each other a short time, but you are dear to me and I have watched the two of you together over this past week.

  ‘Sarah, that man loves you.’

  ‘What?’ Love? Who said anything about love? I mean, sex, yes. Friendship? That too. But love? I mean … fuck. What?

  ‘You don’t believe me.’ It wasn’t a question. She stated it like a fact, and she was right. But still, she was my friend and in this scenario, kind of like my big sister. I should at least hear her out, right?

  Suddenly, my head hurt. I rubbed at the spot between my eyebrows. Yep – a crease the size of the Grand Canyon. Confusion was not only bad for wrinkles,
it also caused tension headaches.

  ‘Look, Gary would say that this is none of my business.’ My look must have told her I agreed with Gary. ‘But, you’re my friend, and I can’t not say something. I see something special developing between the two of you. From the outside, it looks like what I have with Gary.

  ‘And you know I just love that man. God, he makes me laugh. Being with him fills me up. And he’s sexy and fun, and he takes care of me – even when I’m being a grumpy cow.’ She laughed then. ‘You’re looking at me like I’m a little crazy.’ I was? ‘I am grumpy sometimes. I know you haven’t seen that, but it’s true. And he’s there for me. He can handle me like that,’ she added.

  ‘What I see with you and Josh is that intense friendship and passion all rolled together. And, again, I know this is totally not my business …’ I was starting to think that it should be her business – I mean an actual business. Like, she should be a counsellor or something. ‘But I thought you should know that being on the outside and seeing you two together, well, it’s lovely.’

  Lovely? Josh and I are lovely? Holy fuck.

  ‘And all of that led to me asking when you’re going to Chicago. I’m sorry – I’m so nosy. I just—’

  It was my turn to cut her off, finally finding my voice. ‘Marie, you’re right.’ She immediately misunderstood where I was going, and her face lit up into the smile of a matchmaker who’d made the perfect match. ‘No, not about that. I mean about us – you and me – we are friends – dear friends – and I am totally fine with you being nosy. It’s sweet and you have given me a lot to think about. But until this conversation, I hadn’t even thought beyond tomorrow. I mean, I have, but every time I do, it’s that Josh and I say goodbye and it’s sad, and I never see him again.’

  Now it was her turn to look confused. ‘I think this will end up being a lovely, lovely holiday fling, and that I will always remember this time as one of the best of my life. But I don’t think I’ll ever see Josh again after tomorrow.’

  Her eyes started to get teary, and I realised that mine were stinging too. I looked away, and felt the enormity of what I’d said. I took a deep breath. ‘Oh Marie,’ I almost whispered. When I looked at her again, her expression was bereft. I hadn’t realised she was so invested in the ‘Josh and Sarah’ thing. She forced a smile and gave me a quick hug.