The NYCE Girls!
Page 45
That realization is what prompted me to reach out to the girls for an emergency session. I simply feel foolish. Foolish that he managed to trick me with his lame lies. And foolish that I thought a guy like him would fall for a girl like me. I choke back tears as I think of it. Above all, I feel foolish that I let some dumb fling get in the way of my relationship with my sister—and maybe even ruin it for good.
My phone buzzes and I jump up with surprise. It can’t be Jason. I blocked his number as soon as I left the wedding reception. I check the screen and my heart leaps when I see it’s Laura.
“Hello?”
“Hey.” Her voice is quiet and cool.
“Laura. I’ve been trying to reach you.”
“I know. I wasn’t ready to talk yet. Do you have time to chat now?”
“Yeah. I mean, I’m supposed to meet the girls soon but I can be late. This is more important.”
“Okay.” I hear her take a deep breath.
“Before you say anything,” I hurriedly interject, “Laura, you have to know how sorry I am. It was never my intention to steal your thunder, last Sunday or at any point in our lives.”
“I know that,” she says quietly. “I’m sorry too. I could have handled my emotions better. I had a lot of pent-up feelings that just… erupted.”
“I had no idea you felt that way—about your accomplishments and our lives, or our childhoods.”
“Like I said, it’s been building up for awhile.” She pauses. “Look, I’m so proud of you and your accomplishments, Cara, I am. But you have to understand that it’s not always easy to stand next to you.”
“It’s not a competition and I hate that you seem to think it is.”
“Logically, of course I know that. But it’s hard to remember that when I feel like I’m getting overshadowed time and time again. Like, when it came to school, it just kind of left me unmotivated. I lost interest in academic success because I saw that I would never get close to touching yours. So I focused more on other things, like my drawing—stuff I could tell myself you didn’t have.”
“But look where that got you! Your interest in art and your creative skill has you heading up your own interior design firm and you’ve only just hit your twenties.”
She pauses. “That's true.”
“You have so much talent, Laura. You seem to think that I’m some kind of star and you don’t even see your own star quality. To think that you are nothing or that your accomplishments meant nothing…” I stop talking and sit down hard on my desk, my breathing growing ragged. Of all the things Laura said, the idea that she considered herself a “nothing” was the most painful. I choke down the tears that are rising, not wanting to break down crying on the phone.
“It’s okay, Cara,” she says quietly. I hear a soft sniffle on her side of the phone.
I swallow hard and take a deep breath before going on. “It’s not okay. It is absolutely not okay for that idea to even cross your mind—that you’re nothing. I am so proud of you, Laura. So are mom and dad. You are such an accomplished, smart, beautiful young woman. Don’t ever sell yourself short, okay?”
I get another sniffle in response, followed by a small “okay” and my heart swells, my heart aches for my little sister who’s been carrying this awful burden all these years.
“And talk to me in the future, okay? Please? Don’t let this kind of stuff sit and fester. I’m always here to talk to.”
“Yeah,” she clears her throat. “Like I said, it was a lot of pent-up frustration that’s been building up for years. I’m glad I got it out.” She gives a wry chuckle before adding, “But I do wish it hadn’t been at my wedding.”
“I hate myself for ruining your wedding.” My voice catches again and I stop, unable to go on.
“You didn’t, actually.” Her voice sounds slightly defeated. “I mean. It all happened after all the festivities were technically over. It was just such a shock to see you with him of all people. And I’d been so stressed out about the wedding and—”
“I know how stressed you were and that’s why I just can’t forgive myself for bringing even more stress to the day,” I say, jumping up and nervously pacing my office. “That’s the last thing I wanted to do. It’s why I forced Jason to keep the whole thing a secret. I even wanted to end it with him. More than once.”
“I know,” she responds.
“You do?” How on earth would she know that?
“He told me and Jared all about it.”
I sit down again, hard, right on my desk. When did they even talk?
“We spoke on the phone afterwards…before Jared and I left for the airport. Jason explained the whole thing, how it was all his fault, how you tried to end things, and how he was the one who pushed you to keep going.”
“Oh.” I just breathe out the word, in shock, as I think to myself…he took the blame for everything.
“Anyway, I feel like I overreacted a bit…” Laura pauses. “See, the thing is, I wasn’t just stressed out about wedding stuff. My hormones are also going nuts because I’m—”
“You didn’t overreact,” I can’t help but interrupt her. “You had every right to be angry. Especially given the conversation we had just had, about you feeling overshadowed by me as we were growing up. Laura, I never want you to feel that way. We’re two very different people, with different goals and lives. I could never do what you do! Start your own interior design business?! All I ever want is for you to be the best version of you. I know Mom and Dad would say the same. You never had to compete with me. The truth is I’ve always admired you for just being yourself and doing your own thing. You never tried too hard to please others and you forged your own path. That’s so…so brave, to me.” I stop, feeling like I’ll start crying all over again if I go on. “You’re my little sister and I love you,” I manage to croak out the last few words.
I’m met by another sniffle in response. “I love you, too.” And with that, the weight I’ve been carrying on my chest for the past couple days is suddenly lifted. I’m still sitting on my desk and—elbow propped on my knee—bury my head in my hand and give a deep sigh, letting a few tears drop onto my lap.
“So, are we going to be okay?” I ask her.
“Yeah. We’re going to be fine. Are you going to be okay?”
“Of course.” I straighten up. “Why, what do you mean?”
“Jared and Jason talked. Jason said he’s been trying to reach out to you…”
“Yeah, he has. But that’s over now.”
“It doesn’t have to be,” Laura responds softly. “He seems to be really crazy about you, Cara. I want you to find your happily ever after too, you know.”
“Even if it’s with your husband’s brother?” I can’t help but ask.
“Why not? Family is important to all of us. What better way to bring two families together?”
“I never thought of it that way.”
“Think on it, Cara. Just promise me…” She pauses before going on. “Promise me that you won’t throw away your relationship with him because of me. If you don’t want to be with him, fine. But if you still think there’s something there, don’t let me stand in the way. I just want you to be happy.”
“You’re sure?”
“I’m positive. He’s an amazing guy.”
“I don't know.” I pause, embarrassed to share the next detail with her. But if I’m going to demand honesty from her going forward, I should reciprocate. “I Googled him when I was back in New York.”
“So?”
“So, he’s a man about town. And even you and Jared were suggesting that he’s some kind of playboy…”
“He has a past, Cara. Sure. And with his money and his looks, he’s definitely in demand. But he’s looking for the real deal now. He’s made that clear to Jared and to me.”
“I just feel foolish.”
“Why foolish?”
“Well, first that I didn’t see through his lies. And second, he could have any girl he wanted. And I’m j
ust… Me.”
“Yes, Cara, he could have any girl he wanted. But he’s dead set on you. Jared said he’s never seen him like this.”
“Still… He lied to me.”
“Talk to him about it. From what I gather, he’s been burned in the past. Yeah, it was dumb—but the lies were his issue and were no judgment of you or your character.”
“I guess. I don’t know, I’ve been ignoring him since Sunday so he might just give up soon.”
“I highly doubt it,” Laura answers with a small laugh. “For one thing, it’s barely been 48 hours. And for another, Jason is not the kind of guy to give up on what he wants. He’s also not the kind of guy to bullshit you. He’s no Romeo in that sense—saying he wants to get serious about a girl when he doesn’t. He doesn’t play that game, Cara. He’s a businessman. He doesn’t have any interest in flirty games. If he’s pursuing you, it’s because he really wants to be with you. If he just wanted a fling…”
“There’s a million other girls in the city he could choose,” I finish her thought.
“Yup. So maybe don’t throw his next bouquet of flowers in the garbage.”
I laugh out loud. “How did you know that?!”
“Well, when he mentioned he’d been sending flowers but hadn’t gotten any response, I figured you were composting them in a rage. I did warn him not to send any teddy bears. I didn’t want you tearing innocent stuffed animals limb from limb.”
I giggle. “Okay, little sister, I guess you know me pretty well.”
She laughs aloud and the sound lifts a weight off of my heart as I realize it’s going to be okay. I can still laugh with Laura. Our relationship isn’t ruined. Maybe it will be even stronger and closer going forward.
“I have to go. We have a dinner reservation,” she cuts into my thoughts. “But I’m glad I had a chance to talk to you.”
“Me too. When are you back in Boston?”
“We fly back Sunday. First class.” Her voice has a teasing note to it and she gives a small giggle. I smile at the sound.
“Oh, look at you, getting fancy in first class.”
“Jason upgraded us, actually—as an apology. He also got us this super fancy luxury suite in the hotel.”
“Oh, wow.”
“Yeah. It was a nice gesture. Okay, I have to run. Have fun with the girls. You’re headed to the coffee shop I guess?” Laura knows our favorite hangout well from her previous visits to New York.
“Yup. Thanks, sis. Enjoy the rest of your honeymoon.”
I end the call, my heart lighter than it’s been in days. Her words echo in my head—I just want you to be happy. Would my happiness be with Jason? I shake my head, staring down at my hands—once again, the nails are chipped and it’s clearly time for a manicure.
But he lied to me. Why? Because he thought I was some kind of gold digger? I shrug. Let’s see what the girls have to say about all of this.
***
“Oh boy, if that’s the kind of trouble a couple weeks back home can get you into then I’m so not looking forward to my trip for the holidays,” Jazz remarks with a slight giggle.
I’m sitting with the girls at our regular coffee shop, where I’ve been catching them up on my visit home…and I’ve just reached the grand finale of the entire messy tale. We’re sitting at our favorite table, right in the front window. Beth is cozied up next to me in a booth, our backs to the window, and Jazz and Grace are seated opposite us.
“You’re the only girl I know who would slap a guy because he’s too rich,” Beth says, barely suppressing a smile as she takes a sip of her latte.
“Seriously! You find out he’s a billionaire and you deck him?” Grace is outright giggling while Jazz is averting her gaze and trying to hide a smirk behind her coffee mug.
“Well, when you girls put it that way, it sounds silly,” I admit. Even I can’t help laughing at how ludicrous it sounds. “But that’s not the point!” I protest.
“Sure, the point is that he was deceitful, right?” Beth asks. She’s doing the best job out of the three of them at staying serious.
“Right. Twice.”
“Wait, how was he deceitful twice?” Grace sits up from her fit of giggles, getting serious too.
“Well, he didn’t reveal his relation to Jared…and then he concealed his real identity and the fact that he’s a billionaire.”
“Well, you didn’t reveal your relationship to Laura. From what you told us, you two met on a first-name basis, both admitted you were in Boston for a sibling’s wedding, but never got down to the facts—like names.” Beth, ever the journalist, sets the record straight.
“I guess so.” I pause.
“Yeah, you can’t fault him for that,” Jazz chirps. “Really the only thing that he concealed was his uh, net worth, I guess.”
“And he also concealed our relationship.”
“Because you asked him to!” Grace says forcefully.
“Yeah, Cara. I mean, obviously we’re on your side here but you seem really hung up on him being some kind of deceitful liar when… I mean, maybe he’s had girls after him for his money before, who knows,” Beth shrugs.
“Laura did mention that he’s been burned in the past,” I acknowledge. “I just feel dumb. I’m a lawyer. I’m supposed to see through people’s bullshit. But I didn’t see through his.”
“Well, if you’re going to get all Attorney Conley about it, why don’t you at least talk to him and get the facts?” Jazz asks.
“Well, wait, has he tried to get in touch with you since Sunday?” Grace asks. “Like, is there still a chance?”
“Yeah, he’s been sending stuff to my office since I got back,” I admit, looking down at my drink.
“Stuff?” Beth prompts.
“Flowers and notes…”
The girls groan in unison.
“What, like multiple bouquets in less than 48 hours? You’ve been ignoring all that?!” Jazz asks, incredulous.
“I was still stressing about Laura,” I retort, feeling defensive.
“That’s fair,” Beth says, putting a soothing hand on my arm. “We’re not trying to attack you or say you’re in the wrong, Cara. We just want you to be happy.” She glances at the other girls hesitantly.
Grace picks up Beth’s lead. “I mentioned Jason to Nick and he said he’s a really stand up guy, Cara. Coming from Nick that’s pretty high praise and you know it! You really ought to give him a chance. It sounds like you were really happy those last couple of weeks with Jason,” she says, her eyes getting soft. “You deserve to feel that way all the time.”
“And now you’ve resolved everything with Laura,” Jazz says hesitantly.
“So maybe it’s worth hearing him out?” Beth finishes their joint thought.
“Maybe.” I feel my heart pounding faster at the thought of it. Now that Laura has given her blessing—and my girlfriends have helped me get some clarity about the situation—I feel like I do owe Jason at least the courtesy of a conversation. And maybe there’s still hope. “But what if it’s too late?” I voice my fear to the girls. “I’ve been ignoring him. And he’s been linked to…like…every sexy, successful socialite in the city.” I don’t voice my fear aloud but in the pit of my stomach I feel a twinge as I think to myself, he could easily just be with one of them.
“It’s only been a couple days,” Jazz says. “And he doesn’t sound like the kind of guy to give up easily.”
“Yeah, he sounds like too much of an alpha for that,” Grace adds. “And like Laura said, he’s a business man. Yeah, he can get any girl,” she levels her gaze with mine, clearly seeing right through me to my secret fears, “but it sounds like he’s picked you for something real, Cara. If he just wanted to sleep around, there’s plenty of other options”
“He sounds like he’s well beyond his playboy years,” Jazz adds.
“He sounds downright dreamy,” Beth adds, grinning and nudging me.
“Yeah, what does this hunky ‘construction worker’ look like an
yway?” Jazz asks, a sly smile on her face. “He must have been pretty hot for you to get into this mess.”
“Oh god, yeah. He’s very good looking. He’s super tall. Like, he must be 6’4 at least. And he has these big broad shoulders.”
“And big muscles, I bet,” Grace grins.
“And a super strong jaw?” Jazz asks.
“And brown hair? With just a sprinkling of grey starting to set in? And dark eyes?” Grace goes on.
“And a hint of a five-o-clock shadow.” Jazz concludes. It’s not even a question.
“Uh… Yeah,” I respond faintly, vaguely trying to remember when I gave them such a detailed description of Jason. Did I tell them all of this? Then I notice they’re both staring over my shoulder.
Beth, seated next to me with her back to the window, also notices and suddenly whirls around. “Fuck! Cara, is that him?” She asks, elbowing me sharply. “I was wondering what you two goofballs were staring at behind us,” she adds with a laugh to Jazz and Grace.
I feel the blood rushing to my head before I even turn around and my heart is pounding as I slowly turn in my chair.
Sure enough. There, standing just on the other side of the glass, is Jason. When I turn, we lock eyes immediately and that huge smile creeps over his face, crinkling the corners of his eyes. He looks amazing, clad in a dark grey suit and dark blue tie, everything perfectly in place. A huge silver watch gleams on one wrist as he taps on the glass while mouthing the word “hey” to me.