Fumbled Love

by Lila Rose

  He was warm under my hand. I liked that I could touch him without Carter shying away from it. Though my naughty hand wanted to slide up his thigh to see if I got a reaction from him, but it wasn’t the time or the place to be doing that.

  Instead, I just sat with my internal freak-out happening, wondering why he wasn’t pulling away from me.

  Oh God, this was more than what friends did.

  Friends didn’t touch like that.

  Brooke would probably ask if I was trying for second base if I happened to lay my hand on her thigh.

  My mind was a mess while my body tingled, but I’d sit and suffer through it all because it meant I was touching Carter.

  When dinner was done I had a respite from Carter’s warm leg holding when he and his brothers got up to clear the table. Something I thought was very sweet. I was also grateful for the distance as my ears had started ringing from the way my heart was going a million miles an hour. It gave me a chance to settle my nerves.

  We spent the rest of the night in the living room, where I sat next to Carter on one end of the couch. Though I had a feeling I was maneuvered there by Casper. He did, after all, take my wrist in his hand and guide me over to the couch and gently push my shoulders to sit beside an already seated Carter. I found that strange.

  At the end of the night we were saying goodbye at the door, I’d really enjoyed my time with them. They were so welcoming and nice; it was easy to fall into relaxing around them. Especially when they all teased Carter in some way.

  “You’ll have to come back another night,” Beth said with a kiss to my cheek.

  “Mom, you’ll see her at the barbecue, remember?” Courtney smiled.

  “Right, of course.”

  “Still, I would love to come back another time. Maybe we could get together, just the girls. I’m sure my mom and friend Brooke would love it.”

  Beth brightened. “Sounds wonderful.”

  “Girls’ night, yeah!” Courtney shouted, and I caught Carter’s soft smile at me. Was he pleased I wanted to spend more time with his sister and Mom? It wouldn’t be any hardship on my part. They were amazing women.

  State stepped up behind Courtney, wrapping his arm across her chest. “Babe, you should come to the compound for party night.”

  My breath caught. Party night with bikers? Wow. “I’d—”

  “No,” Carter stated roughly as he came up to my side.

  State smirked. “We’d take care of her.”

  “No,” Carter bit out.

  “Come on, brother, you—”

  “Not happening.” Carter glared. He gripped my upper arm and started pulling me toward the front door. “Bye, talk to you Tuesday.” Carter waved over his shoulder. I could hear his brothers laughing at him.

  I turned back. “Thank you for dinner. It was amazing.”

  “You’re welcome, Reagan.” Patty grinned.

  “Bye.” I waved, and they returned it. As soon as we were in the car, I faced Carter as he pulled the vehicle onto the road. “Why did you answer for me back there? I wouldn’t have minded going.” I was kind of annoyed he took my choice away from me though.

  “Reagan, State’s a biker. His friends are all bikers. They’re rough, can be mean, and I wouldn’t like any harm to come to you.”

  Oh… well, that was nice, and I found myself content with his answer. Still, it didn’t mean I couldn’t really go one night. I’d have to talk to Courtney to see how safe it would be and maybe Carter would join us. Honestly, I wouldn’t want to go without him.

  A new thought popped into my mind and had me tensing. What happened if bikers didn’t like football or if they went for another team that wasn’t Carter’s? It could cause problems. They may want to rough him up a bit. I wouldn’t want that to happen, so I couldn’t have Carter go, which meant I wouldn’t go without him.

  “Okay,” I said

  “Okay?” he queried with a frown. “That was too easy.”

  I smiled. “It’s not really my thing anyway.”

  “All right…,” he drew out, probably unsure of my sudden change. He could guess all he wanted, but I wouldn’t tell him it was because I cared about his welfare. That would be just awkward.

  Chapter Twenty

  Reagan

  This weekend Carter had an away game, which gave me time to ponder. Okay, so I was doing most of my thinking the Monday before he arrived home, since I cleaned, buffed, and tidied the house over the weekend before his parents came over. I’d also gone to the movies, had drinks with Brooke, and made sure my parents could come to the barbecue. I was sure Dad cried a little, but he said it was his allergies again. But no matter what I did, Carter was always in the back of my mind. Ever since having dinner at Carter’s parents’ place, it seemed like a switch had been flicked on inside him. Even though it had been a month since he was at the school, he had changed.

  He was just more.

  Not only was he sweeter, but there was simply more in his actions.

  More touching.

  More talking.

  More texting.

  More calls.

  It all played with my emotions to the point they were demanding I just love him already.

  Of course I was freaking out every time he touched me, especially when my gut reaction was to jump him. Before he left for LA, he’d come into the kitchen where I was washing the dishes to say goodbye.

  He’d sought me out to say goodbye.

  But that wasn’t all.

  It was how he’d said it and what he’d done.

  When his hands landed on my waist, I’d tensed as I hadn’t been expecting it. I’d had to lock my body tight while the thrilling vibe passed through my entire being just from his touch. Then, then, he’d leaned in. His warmth had wrapped around my back and against my neck. Then he’d said, all deep and growly, “See you Monday, but I’ll keep in touch.”

  He’d waited for my response, and I’d found it hard to control myself, so I’d breathed out, “’Kay.” Then I’d thought it wasn’t enough, so I’d added, “Be, um, safe on the, ah, grass.”

  “Field.” He’d chuckled.

  His breath had tickled my neck, and then, again, then, he’d touched his lips to my neck and left.

  He’d done it like it was a natural thing to do between us.

  It wasn’t natural.

  I didn’t kiss Brooke’s neck.

  Just thinking about his lips, my body hummed to life. The first night he was gone, I’d masturbated twice thinking of him. The second night I was even naughtier and started while he was on the phone, not that he knew, but his voice was just getting to me. Last night, I’d gone so far as to bring out good old Vance the Vibrator. I nicknamed him Carter while I pictured it was him taking advantage of me. All right, of course Carter could never take advantage of me; I’d offer myself up on a platter for free.

  I’d never come so many times and in so many days close together.

  To say I was satisfied was an understatement… but I knew as soon as I saw him or heard him, I would be a wanton hussy once more.

  Things were getting dangerous because I wasn’t sure if I could keep my hands off him and stay just friends.

  Carter

  Ted, my agent, picked me up from the airport. I would have just caught a taxi home, but he’d said he needed to talk to me and not over the phone.

  “Hey, man.” I smiled, opening the passenger side door and throwing my pack into the back.

  “Careful,” he warned, but it was too late, I’d already tossed it over.

  As soon as I sat, did up my seat belt and Ted pulled into the road, I asked, “So what’s so important you couldn’t say it on the phone?”

  “The girl you’re dating and living with, is she your girlfriend?”

  Unease turned my gut. “Why?”

  “She’s a teacher, Carter. You can do so much be—”

  “You finish that sentence we’re going to have problems. She’s not my girl yet, but she will be, and I don’t gi
ve a flying fuck what anyone says or thinks. As long as I can make her happy, that’s all I care about.”

  Silence.

  Ted and I had never argued over anything, but for Reagan, I would take him down.

  He sighed. “I see.”

  “Yeah, I think you do now. Was that why you wanted to talk?”

  “Well, not the only reason why. The team’s next few games will be away. I have a few things lined up for you in between them so you might have to stay in those towns.”

  “You said the manager was going to get us to play here for a while with only a couple of away games, but now that’s changed?”

  “Yes, due to damage to our stadium that’s only happened in the last few hours.”

  “Man, I don’t want to be traveling—”

  “It won’t be forever, Carter.”

  “How many weeks?”

  “Three at the most.”

  “Fuck.”

  “There are some events you have to attend, some interviews and pictures while you’re away. You’ll be so busy the time will fly by.”

  “You know I hate events. I haven’t done any for ages.”

  “I know, but you’re ending your career soon. These will be the last ones you’ll ever have to do. It’s more about going out with a big bang.”

  “You’re killing me, Ted.”

  All I wanted to do was spend as much time as I could with Reagan, yet I had to go away for three weeks. Where would that leave us? Yes, the phone calls and texts were awesome, but I loved being near her.

  Ted cleared his throat. “So?”

  Shit. I didn’t really have a choice. I wanted to leave the team on good terms. “Fine.”

  “Are you sure this is what you want to do? Leave the team early? You still have a few good years in you, Carter.”

  I shook my head. It was something I’d been thinking about more and more. I was ready to hang up my helmet and move on. “It’s what I want. We’ve already won a Super Bowl. If we make it again this year, that’ll be my last one.”

  “That’s a month away, and your team will make it.”

  “Can only hope.”

  “You’ll probably win the postseason award for “Most Valuable Player” again.”

  Honestly, it wouldn’t bother me if I did or not. Winning it once was enough. When I got it again, it was great, but I’d be happy if another team player won that award.

  All I could do was shrug at Ted again.

  His eyes widened. “You’re different. You used to live and breathe football.”

  I did. But I knew my time was coming to an end, and I was getting more and more okay with that. Especially if I had Reagan on the other end. I just had to make sure of it.

  “I’ve heard you’ve even loosened the reins on your strict diet.”

  “Got to learn to live. I’ve had my fun and enjoyed every moment in the game, but it’s time I moved forward with life. Moving forward to me means happiness on a new level. I’ll play out the season, but that’s it, I mean it, Ted.”

  He grunted. “I know. Never heard you so serious. It’ll be a shame to lose you as a client.”

  I shoved his shoulder. “Aww, you love me.”

  He laughed. “No, I love your money.”

  “You’ll find new clients.”

  “I know. I just had to make sure this was exactly what you wanted. What you chose, and no one else is in your ear forcing you to finish when you don’t really want to.”

  I shook my head. “I want to. It’s all me. My choice.”

  Pulling up out the front of Reagan’s, I turned to Ted. “It isn’t over just yet.”

  “No. So you won’t mind if I throw in a few more interviews and such before it is over?”

  I snorted. “Ted, what you have planned will be enough. You throw in any more, you get no bonus at the end.”

  “You may still need me after you quit.”

  “If it comes to it, I’ll let you know.”

  He nodded. “Talk soon, Carter.”

  “Will do, and thanks for the lift.” Reaching over, I grabbed my bag and got out of the car. Leaning back in, I mentioned again, “One more thing. I need you to understand if you ever talk shit about Reagan and even consider telling me I could do better again, I’ll make sure your career ends with me.”

  He rolled his eyes. “I just had to check how important she was to you.”

  “Very.”

  “Got it, and not that you care, but I do think she’s… changing you for the better. Now enough threatening. Robbie’s expecting me for a very late dinner.”

  “Later.”

  “Goodbye, Carter.”

  After I closed the door, he pulled back out on the road and disappeared. I knew all that BS wouldn’t have all come from Ted. The manager of the team would have pushed Ted to press me, but I wasn’t changing anything.

  Turning, I glanced at the house.

  I was home.

  Home.

  Wherever Reagan was would be a home to me. Admittedly, it sounded serious after only a month, but I couldn’t stop what I felt for the woman. She’d taken my mind, and if it didn’t seem too stalkerish, I wanted to be by her side all the damn time.

  I sounded like a sappy puppy.

  Oh well.

  I didn’t care. I also didn’t care my teammates gave me a lot of crap over the weekend every time I looked at my phone, got a text from Reagan, or dodged them to go to another room to talk with her.

  They were just jealous.

  Okay, the single ones were. The married ones, or if they were involved in a serious relationship, understood.

  However, when Dustin blurted Reagan didn’t actually know how I felt, the so-called friends upped their taunting. Still, I took it like the good guy I was. Why? Because I got to come home to Reagan in the end.

  Except I would have to leave again by the end of the week.

  Shit.

  Unlocking the front door, I opened it and stepped in to find Reagan curled up on the couch asleep. The sight sent my heart racing. God, she was stunning. Even in fluffy socks, flannel sleep pants, and a tee.

  I placed my bag on the ground just inside the door and made my way over. Leaning over the back of the couch, I gently reached down to shift her hair from her face.

  She stirred, blinked, and looked up at me. Her soft smile caused my dick to stir. “Hey, you’re home,” she whispered.

  “I am.” I nodded. I’d give anything to kiss her, but I stopped myself.

  She stretched, her tee riding up, and my gaze landed on her curves. Again, my dick jerked in my jeans. Reagan sat up. “Good game.”

  “You watched it?” I asked, walking around to sit on the couch.

  “I did.” She stood. “Have you eaten?”

  Was she offering herself up?

  “I had something on the plane. It’s getting late. We should probably head to bed.” I stood as well. To my shock and absolute pleasure, she took two steps toward me and wrapped her arms around my waist. Not missing out on the chance to have her in my arms, I curled mine around her. After a moment she tensed. I had a feeling she was probably still half asleep and didn’t know what she was doing, but I’d still take it.

  She pulled back. “Sorry, I, um….” Her cheeks heated. I smiled down at her after she punched me in the arm. “Congrats on winning.”

  Chuckling, I said, “Thanks. We’ll talk more tomorrow. House looks clean. You should have left something for me to do.”

  She shrugged. “It’s okay.” She took a step back. “I’m going to, yeah, head to bed. Glad you’re home safe.”

  The step she took away from me, I ate up with my own feet. Leaning in, I kissed her cheek, and said, “It’s good to be home.” Being that close, I felt her shiver, and smiled. I then took a moment to draw in her scent. Strawberry. The smell of her shampoo I was becoming addicted to, just like the woman.

  Chapter Twenty-One

  Reagan

  I opened the front door to Carter’s family. He was al
ready out back starting up the grill. Shifting to the side, I smiled and gestured them in. “Hi everyone.” I got a kiss on the cheek and a hug from everyone. Even Crispin pulled me down to kiss my cheek.

  “Hi, dollface,” Crispin said before he moved past.

  State, who was behind his boy, cracked up laughing. State stepped up, leaned in and kissed my cheek. “Hey, babe.”

  “Hey.” I sighed.

  “Jesus, State,” I heard Carter clip. I shook my head, and next Carter was at my side. With his arm around my waist, he turned me and led me away from State back into the kitchen. “Need help getting everyone’s drink, sweetheart.”

  Right, drinks.

  Wait… sweetheart?

  What the…?

  Beth called from in the fridge. “Ree, you need a bigger refrigerator, honey.” She was moving things around trying to get in the trays of items they brought with them.

  “Ah, yes, one day I will.”

  “There’s a cooler out back for drinks.”

  “I’ve got it,” Calvin said, and picked up the beer and juices they also brought.

  “Casp, check the grill for me,” Carter called as he shifted his mom aside and started moving more things around.

  “On it.” Casper saluted, then disappeared out onto the deck.

  “Who’d like a drink?” I asked, my brain still not quite focused because of Carter’s sweet endearment. I needed to push it aside, though, or else I didn’t think I’d survive the evening. I heard the front door open.

  “I’ll get the drinks, darlin’,” Patty said with a tap on my shoulder. “You go greet your family.”

  “Thanks.” I smiled and took off. I had to get to them before they saw who was here. “Hi.” I ran up to them, stopping them in the doorway.

  Dad looked kind of pale. “They’re here. Do I look okay? Have they asked about us? What have you told them? Shit… I think I’m going to pee myself.”

  “Herb.” Mom sighed. “Calm down.”

  He shook his head. “Do you know one of Carter’s brothers just got his first role in a movie?”

  “Yes, Carter mentioned it.” It was Casper. I hadn’t known he was trying to be an actor, but I could honestly see him going far with it. He had the looks, and I was sure the skills.