The Starfish Method

by JB Heller

  ME ~It’s not about how much I like him, Ames. And you know it.~

  If it was, there’s no way I’d be pulling the starfish out. I really, really like Sam. He makes me laugh; he’s charming; he’s sweet; and dear God, he’s amazing in bed. The O’s that man has given me will stay with me for life.

  AMY ~WELL IT SHOULD BE!~

  My eyebrows shoot up at her rapid response.

  ME ~Wow, shouty caps. I’m impressed. But it changes nothing. I have to do this. Sometimes a girl’s gotta do what a girl’s gotta do to protect her heart. ’Cause nobody else is going to do it for me.~

  AMY ~Yeah, well, in the past I could understand why you felt that way. But Sam is different. You’re so happy with him. And Tommy says he’s never seen Sam happier either.~

  I can’t do this with her, so I turn my phone off and put it in my bedside table. Yeah, Sam does make me happy. And we click, despite coming from completely different worlds. But it’s not that simple—matters of the heart never are.

  I’ve got a little while before Sam is coming over, so I go out to the living room and dig out Levi’s pellets. I drop a few in his tank and smile as he scuttles out of his hidey hole to retrieve them. “You’ll never break my heart, will you, buddy.”

  I swear he stops and looks at me. I give him a couple of extra pellets for his undying loyalty.

  In the kitchen, I pull out the ingredients to make a quick pasta dish and get to work.

  I’m pouring myself a glass of wine when a knock sounds from my front door, and I go to let Sam in. I invited him over for dinner with the intention of tonight being the night The Starfish Method is put into action.

  When I swing the door open, it’s not the smiling face I’m used to being greeted with. Rather, he’s frowning at his phone. I reach out, touching his bicep. “Everything okay?” I ask, genuinely concerned.

  His head jerks up. “I don’t know. Maybe you should tell me.”

  I’m taken aback by the sharp edge to his words. “What? I—what’s wrong?”

  He pushes past me into my apartment, going straight to my fridge where I’ve started keeping some of his favorite beer on hand. Taking one out, he pops the top then downs the whole thing and reaches for another.

  I’ve never seen him like this before. I approach with caution. “Tell me what’s going on with you.”

  He shakes his head, and when his eyes meet mine, they’re . . . sad.

  “Sam?” I step closer, reaching for him.

  His fingers curl around my outstretched hand, and he tugs me into his hard body then kisses me soundly. I fall into it, letting him take what he so clearly needs from me.

  His hands slide into my hair as he deepens the kiss and walks me backwards along the hall, all the way to my bedroom.

  The back of my knees hit the edge of my bed, and I tumble onto it.

  Sam hovers above me, determination blazing in his blue depths. “Come to my birthday celebration next weekend.”

  I shake my head but keep my mouth shut as I fumble with his belt. We’ll be over by then. Only he doesn’t know it yet.

  His hand covers mine, stilling my progress with his pants. “I want you there, Hannah. I won’t take no for an answer.”

  My throat thickens, and I shake my head again. “I can’t,” I murmur and finish unfastening his pants.

  A frustrated growl ripples through Sam’s chest, and he tugs my hands up, pinning them to the bed above my head. “Why?” he demands.

  “I just can’t.”

  His eyes narrow. “Can’t or won’t? ’Cause I haven’t even told you when it is yet.”

  Crap.

  I shrug. “I’m working the whole weekend next week.” I’ll have to swap some shifts around, but I’ll make it happen.

  Sam shakes his head and slams his mouth on mine. This kiss is different, demanding and possessive. It feels so good I never want it to end. I need to touch him. I pull my pinned hands, but Sam squeezes them tighter until I stop struggling.

  “I want you like this. Don’t move your arms,” he says, and it feels as if he’s staring straight into my soul.

  I nod and he releases them, grazing gentle fingertips over my wrists, my forearms, and my shoulders. Then, he takes each side of the cute button-down dress I’m wearing and rips them apart, sending buttons flying and my desire for him soaring. I squirm beneath him as he tugs his shirt over his head and tosses it to the side then kicks off his pants.

  Keeping his eyes on me, he takes a condom from the top drawer of my dresser and tears it open with his teeth then sheaths himself. My fingers twitch with the need to touch him, but I keep them where he left them.

  He nods at my restless hands and grins. “Don’t like not being an active participant?” he taunts.

  There’s something about his words that sends alarm bells ringing in my head, but I’m not sure what or why. I don’t have time to think about it either as he drops to his haunches between my spread thighs and blows on my sex through my lace panties.

  Holy mother of all things orgasmic. My back arches off the bed when he dips his head lower and glides his tongue over the delicate fabric. “Sam,” I whimper, and my fists clench.

  His deep-blue eyes flick to meet mine as he repeats the move again and again. I’m a wet, dripping mess by the time he’s done. Relief rushes through my entire body when he finally takes my panties in hand and slides them down my legs to position himself at my entrance.

  “Let me touch you,” I beg.

  Sam shakes his head. “No.” And without another word, he thrusts his powerful hips, and he’s buried deep inside me.

  I’m filled with sensation as he sets his pace. In, out, in and out, grinding his pelvis into my clit with every drag back and forth. My body shudders, an orgasm building rapidly. Heat pools low in my belly, tingles shoot through my legs, and I lift them to wrap around his waist, but he stops me.

  “Don’t move, Hannah.” He takes my thighs in his big palms and lowers them back to the mattress, spreading me wide. “Just lie there and take it,” he growls.

  Then, his thrusts turn feral. Hard, fast, and out of time. He pounds into me relentlessly, and I love it. My fingers dig into my comforter, clenching it in my fists as my orgasm ripples through me, and with a harsh growl, Sam follows close behind.

  I knew she was going to call our time to an end soon, but not this soon. Not yet.

  “That was . . .” She pants, catching her breath. “What was that, Sam?” Her eyes scan my face, searching.

  Licking my lips, I sit back on my haunches then reach for her hands still clenched in the blanket above her head. She tangles her fingers with mine and smiles at me, but I still feel the question in her eyes.

  “That’s what I think of your Starfish Method.”

  Her expression goes blank, and she blinks at me. “Excuse me?” she breathes.

  I cock my head to the side. “I said, that’s what I think of your Starfish Method, Hannah.”

  She turns white before my very eyes. The fresh pink blush that stained her cheeks a moment ago is long gone. She opens her mouth to say something, but I silence her with a kiss. I don’t want to hear her words right now.

  Stark relief fills my veins when she kisses me back. I honestly didn’t know how she would respond. When I pull away, unshed tears glisten in her eyes. I smooth a palm over her cheek, resting my thumb on her plump bottom lip.

  “If you think starfishing is going to turn me off, or send me away, you are so very, very wrong, baby. If you just want to lie there and enjoy what I give you, I can work with that. If you want to ride me like our lives depend on it, I’m good with that, too. But I am not good with you trying to get rid of me.”

  She swallows hard then squeezes her eyes shut. “Can you give me a bit of space for a second please?” she whispers.

  I’m off her in an instant, rolling to her side.

  She scrubs her face with her hands then takes a deep breath and sits. She reaches for the silk robe on the end of the bed before sl
ipping it over her shoulders and wrapping it around her waist. Then, she turns back to face me.

  “We need to end this. I’m sorry, but we have to.”

  “Why? We’re so good together. Why would you want to throw that away?” I ask, so damn confused.

  “Because you terrify me. You already have a piece of my heart after such a short time. If I don’t walk away now, you’ll have it all, and when you’re done with me . . . I won’t have anything left.”

  I don’t know what I was expecting her to say, but that was not it. I close the distance between us and take her hands in mine. “Then stay with me, Han.” Releasing one of her hands, I wipe away the tear clinging to her cheek. “I won’t ever be done with you, baby,” I vow.

  But she shakes her head, even as she leans into my palm cupping her jaw. “I can’t. And you will. I’ve been here before, Sam, and I don’t have another heartbreak in me. You’ve obviously talked to Amy if you know about The Starfish Method. This is just what I need to do.”

  A sad smile tugs at the corner of her mouth, and I desperately want to kiss her sadness away. Then, she chuckles lightly, as if any of this is funny. “You’ve ruined it for me, if that makes you feel any better.”

  I frown. “Ruined what?”

  “I’ll never be able to pull a starfish again without thinking of you.” She blinks rapidly as more tears gather on her lashes. “I actually think you’ve ruined me for all other men.”

  Satisfaction surges through me. “Good. That’s good. I don’t want another man to touch you ever again. You’re mine, Hannah. What do I need to do to show you I’m not going anywhere?”

  She shrugs and sniffles. “Nothing. I don’t think there’s anything you can do to change my mind.”

  “Fuck that,” I spit. Getting to my feet, I snatch my clothes and tug them on.

  I pause at the door, turning to look at her one more time. “I’ll figure it out. So get ready for me, baby, because when I want something, nothing can stop me. I will do whatever it takes.”

  The next week passes painfully slowly as I spend every waking minute trying to come up with a way to show Hannah that she can’t push me away like this. That as long as she still has feelings for me, I will fight for her.

  “I’ve brought in reinforcements!” Tom announces, barging into my apartment.

  Amy pokes her head out from behind Tom’s back and waves. “Hi, Sam.”

  “Would you two go away? I’m trying to think,” I grumble, not in the mood for the lovey-dovey shit they’ve been throwing in my face all week.

  Tom rolls his eyes and makes himself comfortable on one of the bar stools at my kitchen counter. “We gave you time to work this out on your own, and honestly, man, I thought you would have cracked it by now. But the stress is obviously causing your brain to misfire, so we came to spell it out for you.”

  I shake my head. “What are you talking about?”

  “Her sharks,” Amy pipes up. “You need to go swimming with her sharks.”

  My heart stops dead in my chest. Anything but that. “Are you insane? How am I going to show her I love her if I’m dead?”

  Amy’s eyes bug out. “You love her?”

  Shit, I think I do. No, I know I do. Otherwise, I wouldn’t be considering this asinine plan of theirs.

  Sam more than blew my starfish out of the water; he blew it out of the stratosphere. And I still pushed him away. No other guy would turn it around on me like he did. He made the starfish something hot and amazing. Who knew that was even possible? I didn’t, and I’ve been doing it for years.

  What is wrong with me? Oh, I know. Assholes—they’re what’s wrong with me. I was so sure I had it all figured out. The starfish weeded out all the assholes. It sent them packing with very little effort on my part. But Sam? I don’t think he’s one at all. And not just because he turned my escape plan on its head.

  Not even spending time with my girls has helped my morose mood these past few days. I’m back on the dive platform, watching Tina do her sharky thing, and the joy it usually sparks is just not there today.

  “Mind if I join you?”

  Sam’s deep voice has my head whipping around so fast it spins. I must be more than dizzy, ’cause it looks like Sam is wearing a wetsuit. I blink a couple of times to clear my vision, but nope—he’s still in a wetsuit. “What are you doing here?” I ask.

  His face pales as he gets closer to the edge of the tank where I’m sitting and peeks over into the water. “It’s hot out. Thought I’d, ah, go for a . . . umm.” He swallows hard and clears his throat. “A dip. I thought I’d go for a dip,” he says.

  I snort. Always with the jokes, this guy. “Get serious.” I laugh. “What are you really doing here?”

  He licks his lips, steps out onto the diving platform with me, takes another deep breath, and then sits beside me, legs in the water. “I’m not joking.” His voice cracks with the words.

  Now that he’s next to me, the sheen of sweat covering his brow and gathering on his top lip is unmissable. He’s sweating up a storm and super white, too. “Sam, are you feeling okay?”

  “Just dandy,” he says and sways to the side.

  I reach out and grab him, holding him upright and steady. “I think you need to see a doctor. Something is definitely wrong with you.”

  He shrugs me off. “I’m fine. I’m doing this, and you can’t stop me!”

  “Umm, okay. What is it you’re trying to do? Kill yourself?”

  His eyes widen. “See?” he yells over his shoulder. “I told you they’d eat me!”

  What in the hell is going on? I get to my feet and turn around to find Tom’s and Amy’s heads sticking out from behind an air vent. “Would someone care to explain?”

  Tom opens his mouth to speak, but a splash has me spinning around to find Sam has disappeared. “Sam!” I scream, running to the edge of the platform. He’s sinking. Oh God, can’t he swim? I dive in after him. It takes four powerful strokes to reach him, and I wrap my arms around his torso and kick as hard as I can.

  We resurface seconds later, and Tom helps me haul an unconscious Sam onto the platform.

  “What happened?” Tom demands. “Did you push him in? The guy is just trying to show you he loves you, and you try feeding him to your sharks! What is wrong with you?” he yells as I clear Sam’s airway and roll him on his side.

  Sam coughs and hacks up water. When I’m sure he’s done, I turn him back over and slap him as hard as I can.

  He bolts upright. “What was that for?” he yells.

  “For scaring the crap out of me, you asshole!” I yell back.

  “Guys, guys, settle down.” Amy’s calm voice enters the fray.

  “Oh, fuck off, Amy. What the hell are you even doing here?” I spit. She and I haven’t spoken since she admitted to spilling the beans about The Starfish Method to Sam and Tom.

  She huffs and crosses her arms. “This is the thanks I get for helping get the best thing that ever happened to you back? You’re so ungrateful, Han.”

  Still crouched at Sam’s side, I throw my hands in the air. “Would someone please tell me what is happening?”

  Sam grabs my flailing hands and knots our fingers together. His wet hair drips in his eyes, and he smiles at me with so much tenderness my heart aches. “I love you, Hannah. I thought coming here and facing my completely reasonable fears, by swimming with your babies, would show you that. But maybe I should have just told you.”

  Tears pool in my eyes, and I sniffle, desperately trying to hold them at bay. “You were going to swim with my girls? For me?”

  He nods then shrugs. “I guess I technically did swim with them. Even though I was unconscious, it still counts, and I’m never doing it again.”

  Joyous laughter spills from my lips, and I launch myself at him, knocking us both back into the tank. I wrap my arms around him and kiss him hard. He doesn’t kiss me back until I whisper, “They’re scared of the splashing, and they’re on the other side of the tank by now. I pro
mise.”

  Then, it’s on. Sam’s mouth crashes into mine, and we kiss like it’s our first and our last.

  “I love you, too,” I murmur against his lips then lead him over to the submerged ladder and let the big scaredy-cat exit the tank first.

  TWO YEARS LATER. . .

  I hover over my insanely gorgeous wife and trail kisses along her torso, paying extra attention to her sensitive breasts.

  She sighs and rolls her hips into my hard-on. “Good morning,” she mumbles sleepily.

  “Isn’t it?” I say before sucking a pink nipple into my mouth. Hannah simply hums her assent. I move along her body, drawing pleasured moans and sighs from her. Skimming my nose along her throat, I relish the little shiver that ripples through her.

  Positioning myself at her entrance, I go to surge forward, but something occurs to me, and I pause.

  “Why’d you stop?” she whines.

  “Are you starfishing me right now?”

  Her eyes pop open, and she laughs. “Seriously?” She shakes her head, grinning. “Sam, I’m tired and heavily pregnant. I couldn’t wrap myself around you even if I tried.”

  The sound of her laughter still affects me as much as it did when we met. I fucking love it. “Just checking.” I chuckle, and she reaches for my face, dragging it to hers so I can kiss her thoroughly.

  What to read next? If you enjoyed The Starfish Method, you will love Pink Bits. Turn the page for the first chapter.

  “Pink Bits is a refreshingly unique, snort-laugh worthy read that I could not put down! Featuring quite possibly the funniest meet cute ever, it's a definite must read.” - Amali Rose, Author

  Pink Bits

  Did you know that swans are the only birds with an external penis? It’s totally true—and fascinating, if you ask me. I mean, can you imagine a little hummingbird flying around with a penis? Disturbing, right? But a swan—I can get behind that.

  This is the latest fact I’ve submitted into the Pink Bits database. I love my job so much. Spending my days searching out weird, wonderful, and completely random facts is a dream come true. It helps that Pink Bits Hygienics is my dad’s company, and he created the position especially for me. Hell, he created the company because of me, and his sisters.