Pretend You’re Mine

by Black, Natasha L.

  I would find out soon enough.

  When I got there, my parents were waiting at the door and greeted me with hugs.

  “It’s so good to see you,” they said.

  “It’s good to see you too,” I said in return.

  I stood there, blinking stupidly at them. This felt like some kind of B-list movie, where the director had suddenly ripped our scripts to pieces and told us to improvise. How was I supposed to improvise when I didn’t know why my parents had finally agreed to meet me, after so many unanswered calls and texts?

  I could only make it halfway through brunch - a delicious apple French toast concoction.

  “So what made you guys change your mind?” I finally asked them.

  I glanced at Teren, who shook his head. “Guess again,” he said.

  “I don’t know, the Grace of God?”

  “Watch your language, young lady,” Dad said sharply.

  “Sorry,” I said. “Although if you would just tell me then I wouldn’t have to guess.”

  “He made us promise not to tell,” Mom said. Reaching over the table she sifted her fingers through mine. “Just know, that we know that you didn’t mean for any of this to happen – and that you’re doing your best.”

  I squinted at her. I was beyond grateful that my parents were being so gracious and forgiving, but I was confused as hell. Mom had said, ‘he made us promise not to tell’. Who the hell was ‘he’?

  All through brunch, imploring them for answers did nothing. Finally, it was time to go to the party and I only had an hour to get ready.

  I had just stepped through my door, when my phone went off. You ready? Xander’s text said. I’ll be over in 30.

  I reread the text with a small shrug. Maybe he wasn’t the cause of my parents coming around. Maybe, they’d just talked to Reverend Ron or something and he had said something about the merits of forgiveness and releasing your soul from resentment and blah blah blah. Whatever it was, I was just happy to be in my parents’ good graces again.

  In my room, I searched my closet for every and anything that could be suitable for this Christmas party tonight. But every dress I pulled out I ended up flinging to the floor since there was something wrong with it. My perfect green a-line dress had a coffee stain that I couldn’t get out of the hem. My blue tight one gave me a tummy ache as soon as I put it on. My red satin one was too froufrou.

  When my phone went off again, Xander having arrived presumably, I glared dismally at my still half-naked self. Behind me, my clothes were everywhere. It looked like my closet had turned into a volcano and spewed clothes everywhere.

  I squared my shoulders. No more time wasting, I’d have to decide. About all of this.

  31

  Xander

  Finally having figured out what I wanted to say about Naomi at the Christmas party later that day, I was drilling my fingers on the car dash as I waited for her to come down. I’d already drafted part of it yesterday, when I went to see my family on my own time and told them what I’d been meaning to.

  The “you look stunning” I’d planned to say came out as a garbled sort of cough as soon as I saw her.

  “You okay?” Naomi asked.

  “Fine, fine,” I managed to say.

  Because she didn’t just look stunning. She looked in-fucking-credible. She had on a dress that was a white wonder, made of some super soft fabric I wasn’t sure the name of. It had a high neckline that set off her long neck perfectly, and hugged the curve of her hip perfectly, before floating out around her and stopping just above her knee.

  Just what we were going to and just what this all meant came crashing down on me in the same time.

  Naomi squeezed my bicep gently. “Xander?”

  “It’s fine,” I quipped dryly, “Just don’t ask me to look at you for any length of time.”

  She raised an eyebrow as she let her finger trail down her side under her coat. “What? This old thing?” she said with mock sexiness, batting her eye lashes at me.

  “Good to see you in better spirits,” I commented.

  “All part of the show, baby.” She put on a grin that would have fooled me if it weren’t for her eyes.

  “Hey.” I caught her hand. “Don’t do that.”

  Still that smile was lingering like an unwanted friend. “Do what?”

  “Can’t we just be us?” I said.

  And just like that, the first real twinge in her eyes showed. “Let’s just get through today, and then we’ll see.”

  And then we’ll see… looked like that was the best I was going to be getting out of her. In any case, she was in better spirits. As we drove there, Naomi and I ooh’d and ah’d over the Christmas lights on the city buildings, big and small, as well as the odd horse-drawn carriage we saw clopping by.

  “You have to admit,” I said, “LA does Christmas well.”

  “L.A does Christmas well,” Naomi allowed.

  “You should see my family’s party though. They go all out. And by an all-out, I mean….”

  “Don’t tell me,” Naomi said. “I want it to be a surprise.”

  “You and your surprises,” I said.

  She turned to me with an incredulous grin. “No, you and your surprises. You’re the one who’s made every other date a surprise somehow.”

  “You like them.”

  She turned to face the window. “Maybe.”

  Outside, a light rain had started up, as if the weather was trying to do a sad imitation of snow.

  “Don’t worry,” I said as I pulled into the front of the hotel it was at. “I’ve an umbrella in the glove compartment.”

  And so, with Naomi on my arm and my umbrella in hand, I conveyed us into the Ritz-Carlton.

  The lobby was basically what you’d see if you opened the dictionary and went to the Christmas page. Wreaths coated every railing that could hold them, holly garlands everywhere else. Everything had a certain sheen to it; even the concierge behind the front desk.

  “How may I help you?” she said in a no-nonsense tone.

  “My family has one of your banquet halls booked. The Schmidts,” I said, and she nodded.

  She consulted a list, then swept her hand to the left. “Right that way, third door on the right.”

  As much as I’d steeled myself for what to expect, I still was in no way prepared for what greeted me inside.

  It wasn’t just a Christmas fiesta, as my family had called it; it was Christmas madness. Fake snow floated everywhere, while metallic gold and silver bows and paper glazed most of the room. Towering in the middle of it all was a tree so hulking, there’d be casualties if it fell over. And then flitting by, every which way, were bow-tied servers with trays laden with food. Set up on a banquet table there was even more – duck, goose, apple and sausage stuffing, traditional Christmas Stollen.

  “I’m getting full just looking at it all,” Naomi commented.

  I was about to respond when I saw Aunt Edna headed determinedly our way.

  “Let’s go this way,” I told Naomi, tugging her along.

  I didn’t want anyone saying anything before I made the speech. That was when I wanted Naomi to find out.

  Although, as I headed to the dessert table, which had previously looked mostly unattended, I saw the last person I wanted to - my dad.

  “Xander,” Naomi said exasperatedly as I pulled her away, yet again.

  She made as though to break free, but my grip didn’t budge. “Just trust me, okay? I’m getting us some wine and then I want to make a toast. I’ve been blackmailed into it, basically.”

  That much was true, although I didn’t mention that, although there’d been mutual agreement on the brief bit I was going to say, I’d added in my own part.

  So, I got us some wine, sat Naomi at our table and walked up to the podium.

  “Everyone,” I said, expecting just the reaction I got.

  With the room booming with the mix of the band playing Christmas tunes and my family’s loud voice talking, my voic
e was basically inaudible.

  Positioning the microphone closer to my lips, I yelled, “Everyone!”

  Over the next few seconds, the noise began to die down until it was only a murmur that I was able to comfortably to speak over.

  “Welcome to the Schmidt family Christmas party.” I swung an arm around my surroundings. “As you can all see, my family takes Christmas sort of seriously.”

  The room rumbled in appreciative laughter at that, although I wasn’t looking at the only person whose laughter I really cared about. I couldn’t look at Naomi, not until I said what I was going to.

  “As most of you know, I’m Xander, and I live right here in LA, unlike most of my family. The times we do get to see each other are few and far between, so when we do, we try and make the most of it. Tonight is no exception. If you’re here, that means that you’re important to my family and I, so we celebrate you.” I lifted my cup of wine. “Here’s to all of us.”

  “To us,” everyone said and drank, then talk started to simmer up again. But I wasn’t finished yet.

  “Before I leave off and leave you all to your feasting,” I said. “There’s one more thing I’d like to say. Many of you know my wife Naomi.” I gestured over to her table, again without looking at her. If I looked at her, I might lose my nerve. “What you don’t know, however, is how much I love her. So, this next toast I want to raise to Naomi. Here’s to you, my stunning wife, the woman who makes me the happiest man in the world.”

  And then, when the whole room was rumbling with, “To Naomi”, I finally dared look at her.

  32

  Naomi

  Had I just heard Xander right? Had he just told his whole family that he loved me – and had it been real or for show? And what was I going to do about my earlier decision?

  The only thing to do was to down my wine in one go. And just like that, Xander materialized beside me, smiling. On my other side, somehow Aunt Edna had hobbled up without me noticing. Shaking her cane, she declared, “Xander told us everything. I’m just sorry he put you through all that nonsense. You poor girl.” She waggled her cane some more. “But I’ll just say this - I like you two together.”

  And with a final stab of her finger, she was gone as fast as she had come.

  Now, it was just Xander and I, and the insane impossibility that had just happened.

  “Are you hungry? I’ll make you a plate,” Xander offered.

  I could only shakily nod.

  There were still so many questions, and all I had was this wine.

  Xander returned with a plate overflowing with enough food to feed me and my family for the next week. As I dug in, he explained everything. How our whole accidental marriage had gone down, and how he’d been determined to keep up appearance. How, in the end, he’d really fallen for me, crazy enough. That was when he came to the part he’d clearly been the most nervous about.

  “About the annulment,” he said. “If that’s what you want, I’m all for it. I just want to be with you, whatever way I can have you. If you don’t want to be married, we can just date. Either way, I just want to be with you Naomi. For a very long time.”

  How was it, that he was saying the exact words I would’ve dreamed of him saying?

  “And I want to be with you not because it’s going to keep my family off my back.” He made a face. “Something tells me that even when I’m dead they won’t be off my back. I want to be with you because I love you. I never thought I’d feel the way you make me feel. It’s crazy and it’s scary, and it’s wonderful all at the same time. I love you Naomi. I really do.”

  As he took both my hands, I could only smile dopily at him.

  “So?” He said, his grin having a frenetic quality to it.

  “So.” I kissed his one hand and then the other. “That sounds good to me.”

  Xander practically choked on the cookie had been he’d been tentatively nibbling on. “That sounds good to you? What the hell does that mean?”

  Xander was all serious now. Taking my hands up to his chest, he said, “What do you want Naomi?”

  The question was laced with intensity, for good reason. This was it, I realized, as the Christmas music jingled, and some people laughed, and my heart pressed up tight against my chest to see what I’d do.

  Even though it was obvious what I’d say, what the right answer was.

  “I want to be with you too,” I said.

  Finally, I’d told him. I’d told him what I’d decided myself before, funny enough; that, for better or for worse, I knew I had to go with my heart – that I wanted to be with him.

  “Guess this is the part where we’re supposed to say Merry Christmas,” Xander said, smiling at me as if he’d gotten his present already.

  In a way, we both had.

  The rest of the party went even better. I wasn’t just Xander’s new companion to his family now, I was family, and they treated me as such. Alliana was nowhere in sight, and the few people I didn’t know from the other engagements came up to introduce themselves. There was Xander’s godmother, Emma, who was a wide woman with a little smile, and a collection of moles on her the right side of her neck, who just about whooped when she met me. There was Mr. Weber, a friend of Xander’s father, who told me in no uncertain terms with his long horse teeth and fish breath, that I was “a keeper”. And then there was Xander’s father himself, who pulled me aside at the end of the meal.

  “I just wanted to say it myself,” he said. He had on a little hat that obscured his bald spot, and I could see he had Xander’s eyes almost exactly. His smile was wistful. “You make Xander a better man. I can see that now. And I won’t interfere any longer, I can promise you that. I am truly sorry Naomi. Welcome to our family, we’re lucky to have you.”

  “Thank you,” I said, meaning it.

  His apology, which I could see was genuine, was the cherry on an already sundae of a day

  “Stealing Naomi already?” Xander’s question was light, but when he joined us, his face had a dark expression on it.

  “He was just apologizing, actually,” I said.

  His father gave a slight incline of his head. “For meddling where I shouldn’t have. Although now that you mention it, I do have a lot more things to apologize for.”

  There was no warmth in Xander’s features, as he said, “You do.”

  His hand closed over mine. “We have to mingle.”

  I broke free, patted his hand. “It’s fine. You talk to your dad.”

  His body was still facing me. “You sure?”

  I gave his hand a squeeze. “I’m sure.”

  I went to dance on the dance floor with some kids and a funny woman named Mia, and a few minutes later, Xander was joining me. He leaned in with a shining kid-like face. “We talked. For the first time in years, we really actually talked.” A broken smile. “You want to know something? I believe him. I forgive him.”

  He draped his arms around me and we began to do a two-step. “I still think he’s a bastard for what he did. Cheating on my mom. But that was over a year ago now and Mom forgave him. That doesn’t make what he did okay, far from it. It’s just….”

  “He’s your dad,” I said. “And hating him took too much energy anyway.”

  Xander’s look grew curious.

  “Believe me,” I said, “I had to do a shit-ton of forgiveness work to stop hating Eric so much that I’d wish he’d die in a fiery car crash.”

  “Damn.” Xander whistled, but I could see he was half-smiling. “So you don’t anymore?”

  “For the most part.” I grinned.

  Xander chuckled, then I said, “Seriously though, no. I mean, if something bad happened to him I don’t know if I’d be sad exactly. But I don’t hate him anymore at least. Anyway, want to open the gifts now?”

  “Hell yeah,” Xander said.

  I was lucky I hadn’t forgotten to bring my bag, which I’d stashed by the door as we came in.

  In the lobby, parked on a lush black leather seat, we gave each o
ther our gifts. Xander opened mine first. He laughed at the sight of the dog booties for Walter, saying, “If anyone can get him to wear those, it’ll be you.”

  The Dali wallet, however, left him downright grinning for a half-hour. He kept turning it in his hands, taking in the liquefied-looking leather clocks, the same as Dali’s most famous painting, The Persistence of Memory.

  “You can actually get ones like this?”

  “Yeah, if you try hard enough,” I said.

  What I didn’t mention was that I’d had to hound some online custom wallet maker two days ago and offer an exorbitant amount for her to agree to make the Dali wallet last-minute.

  Anyway, now it was time for my gift and the way Xander was watching me intently made me feel uneasy.

  “It’s not annulment papers is it?” I asked, only half-joking.

  “Thanks for having such high expectations of my gift,” Xander said cheerfully. “Now open it,” he barked.

  “Okay, grumpy,” I said, although I did as I was told.

  The green and red wrapped present was small, about the size of a ring box and for second, I was afraid that was just what Xander had done. As close as we had grown in these last few days, I definitely wasn’t ready to receive a real ring from him.

  We’d just gotten to a place where we could admit that we had real feelings for each other, now wasn’t the time to put a ring on it.

  Inside though, folded into small squares, there was something much, much better.

  “Tickets, to Germany?!” I lifted them in front of my face, staring at the type as if it would change the longer I stared. But there it was, one week from now, tickets to Berlin, flying First Class.

  “No pressure,” Xander said, “But I’m pretty sure that Walter would hate Germany.”

  I could only laugh. “Guess that’s it then. Although there’s just one thing we have to do first.”

  “What?” Xander said.

  I kissed him full on the lips, the kiss making its way to his ear. “Take me back to your place.”

  “Speaking of,” Xander said. “Forgot to tell you about the other part of your gift.”