In three steps Benning had his daughter wrapped in his big arms, her face buried in his shoulder as he stroked her hair. “Everything is going to be okay, Liv. Owen is going to be home soon. I promise. We’re working with Ana’s team to find him, and he’ll be annoying the heck out of you sooner than you think.”
Turning her attention to getting dressed, Ana was aware the moment wasn’t meant for her. No matter how easy it’d been to fall back into old habits, familiarities and jokes, she wasn’t part of this family. And she never would be. The work she did couldn’t be compromised. Not by her past experiences. Not by the six-year-old girl who’d wrapped her arms around Ana as she’d gone to sleep last night, and definitely not by the man determined to take up too much space in her head.
“Will the skull you put in the fireplace help find him faster?” Olivia asked.
Ana twisted around, her heart in her throat. “What’d you say?”
Maneuvering Olivia back at arm’s length, Benning wiped his daughter’s tears with the pads of his thumbs, then gripped both her arms. He lowered his voice. “Olivia Kay Reeves, tell me you aren’t the one who took that skull from the fireplace.”
“I wanted to solve the case.” Olivia’s face fell as another round of tears streaked down her flawless cheeks. “I brought it to my lab.”
“What lab?” Ana took a single step forward.
Benning slid his hands down his daughter’s arms as he turned to face Ana. “She and Owen built a fort in the backyard where they like to pretend to solve cases. The skull must be there.”
* * *
“SHE REALLY IS one hell of an agent,” Ana said.
“I wish that made me feel better.” All this time the evidence he’d removed from Britland’s construction site had been right in his own backyard. Well, it’d been in his backyard before, but his daughter wasn’t supposed to be the one who’d found it. His stomach knotted. This was the kind of thing nightmares were made of, and Olivia had... Hell, she’d done what any good investigator would’ve done and preserved the evidence. “Six-year-olds aren’t supposed to hide bones from their parents in a fort in their backyard.”
The forensic techs pulled the evidence from the makeshift fort his kids had built out of extra two-by-fours and subfloor from one of the sites he’d inspected last summer. Owen and Olivia had spent every waking second in their hideout when the weather was good. In fact, he’d had to drag them into the house by their ears for dinner on many occasions. Now it was a crime scene, stained by the very thing he was trying to protect them from.
“We have the skull now. My team will run DNA and dental records, and we’ll figure out time and cause of death.” Ana slipped her hands into her jacket pockets. “If Olivia hadn’t moved it, the killer would’ve gotten ahold of it first and destroyed the evidence, Benning. Getting an ID on this victim is how we get your son back.”
She was right, but at what point would it be okay to say his family had been through enough? How much more blood, fear and near-death experiences did he and his kids have to take before what he’d built cracked beyond repair? Olivia could obsess over becoming an investigator all she wanted, but there was a difference between reading about this kind of stuff in her mystery novels and seeing it firsthand, and he didn’t want any part of it. Not for her. Not for the woman at his side. What kind of life was that? What kind of person wasn’t affected by this kind of work on a deep, scarring level? Benning knew the answer the second the question had crossed his mind, and right then he understood. Understood the deeper reason why Ana had chosen to cut herself off from her family and friends...from him. Understood why she’d kept her emotions out of relationships, and how she was able to step onto scenes like this over and over again with a kind of numbness and detachment. Because without that boundary in place, she risked the people she cared about the most. Nobody—not even she—could handle a lifetime of that kind of guilt if something happened to one of them. “How do you do it? All the pain, the death, the risk of endangering the people you care about. You’ve made a career out of stuff like this, and I can’t even handle it for a few days.”
One breath. Two.
“You know as well as I do it doesn’t come without a cost, but I realized a long time ago giving people another chance to live their life is worth the sacrifice.” Ana limped toward the scene, then paused, turning back toward him. Controlled chaos played out behind her, but the world seemed to disappear in the moment her eyes lifted to his. No crime scene techs, no body parts being collected and bagged in his backyard. It was just the two of them. Hints of red colored the tip of her nose and cheeks, the confidence in her eyes overwhelming. “You’re stronger than you think you are, Benning. The only reason your kids are still here is because you fought to protect them. Remember that the next time you ask yourself if you’re doing enough. You’re everything to them.”
Yet, he’d been the one to put them in danger in the first place.
A car door slammed from the other side of the property, and he turned his attention to the older, white-haired couple headed for the front of the house. Lilly’s parents.
Benning faced the elongated front porch he and his father had built a few years ago, studying Olivia with her notebook and pen in hand as she rocked back and forth in the hanging swing. He used to rock her and Owen to sleep as babies on it. It’d been the three of them, one of them in each arm, and the crickets on that swing when he’d promised to protect them for the rest of their lives. For the first time he could remember, he’d failed.
The brightness in Olivia’s expression gripped his heart in a vise as he climbed the stairs and sat beside her. She was obviously having the time of her life watching real investigators and technicians collect evidence, taking notes on what they did, what they said, how they bagged the evidence. He swiped his uninjured hand down his face. She’d found a human skull in their fireplace and had moved it without hesitation to solve the crime herself. Hell, he had to start watching what kind of stuff she was reading. “Liv, I need you to go spend a couple nights with Grandma and Grandpa while I help the FBI look for your brother. It’ll be safer for you there.”
He and Lilly hadn’t had the greatest relationship. Really, they’d only gotten married to make it easier on the kids as they got older, but he’d always liked and respected her parents, and they loved their grandchildren despite the choices he and Lilly had made. He trusted them to watch over and be there for his daughter in case...he couldn’t. Benning bit the inside of his cheek to counter the sinking sensation in his stomach.
The scribbling on her note pad slowed. “I want to stay with you.”
He moved a piece of long brown hair out of her face and tucked it behind her ear as his insides tore bit by bit. He should’ve gone straight to the police after he’d found the skull instead of coming home because Owen had been sick. Should’ve been strong enough to fight off the bastard who’d taken his kids. Should’ve gone after Ana seven years ago when he’d had the chance so there wasn’t this invisible distance between them now. His life was full of wrong choices, but he’d never forgive himself if something happened to Olivia because of his own selfish need to keep her close. “I know, but think of it this way. Grandma has a whole bunch of mystery novels you haven’t read yet.”
Curiosity pulled her attention from the crime scene, and those beautiful blue eyes widened. “How many?”
“She told me she ordered a ton of new ones for you last week.” He settled one elbow on his knee, leveling his shoulder with hers. Nudging her with his arm, he unbalanced her enough to keep her attention on him. “Thirty. Maybe more.”
“And I get to read them all?” she asked.
“I told Grandma you get to read as many of them as you want.” Threading his hand in hers, he helped her off the swing and nodded toward Lilly’s parents. Within two minutes Olivia, her booster seat and the bag he’d packed for her were loaded into the back of his in-laws’
pickup truck. “I’m going to see you in a couple days, okay?”
“Okay.” She hugged her bag tighter. “Don’t forget to call me tonight when I go to bed.”
“I will, baby. See you soon.” He kissed the top of her head, memorized the way the scent of her shampoo tickled the back of his throat, then shut her inside and stepped back. Slush kicked up behind the pickup’s tires as his daughter centered her face in the rear window and stared back at him with a small wave. He waved back, and something inside him cracked. First, Owen had been taken from him. Now he needed Olivia as far from this case as possible.
“You made the right decision.” Ana stepped into his side, her soft, dark hair lifting into his face as wind ripped through the trees, and a shiver raced down his spine. She’d been there nearly every step of the way, protected his daughter from harm, nearly died to ensure he and Olivia had made it to safety at the cabin, and was working tirelessly to locate his son. Where his heart threatened to shred in his chest as his in-laws turned onto the main road back toward Sevierville, Ana was there trying to hold him together. She’d always been there. Because he hadn’t been able to let her go all this time.
“There was nothing to think about. Every second she’s around me is another chance that bastard can get his hands on her.” Warmth spread down his arm as she curled her fingers around his inner elbow. “I should’ve gotten her out of town when I had the chance, but I couldn’t...”
“Stand the thought of losing her, too? I might know a little something about that.” She did. More than he ever would. She buried her nose beneath the high collar of her jacket, then tucked her hands into her pockets, taking the heat she’d generated with her. “I could tell you it gets easier over time to help you feel better, but it’d be a lie.”
“Has anyone ever told you your bedside manner could use some work?” he asked.
“I don’t think anyone but you would have the guts.” Her laugh pierced through the unsettling haze closing in on his thoughts as the pickup dipped below the horizon, and hell, he loved that sound. Loved the way her smile reached her eyes, how her smile lines perfectly framed her full lips, loved the way that laugh shot heat straight through his system. She nodded back over her shoulder toward the house. “Come on. It’ll be a few hours before forensics has any information on the skull. Until then, we can make up for the sleep your daughter stole from us last night as soon as the tech team is finished. Then we can review the list of Britland Construction employees together. Make sure there’s not someone on that list we need to take a closer look at.”
The gut-wrenching weight of sending Olivia to his in-laws’ farm for a couple days started to lift. How was it possible, in the most terrifying circumstances he’d ever imagined, Ana still kept him grounded, kept him from losing control? If he hadn’t requested her to work this case, would he have been able to keep it together this long? Would the killer have gotten exactly what he’d wanted, and taken Benning and his twins down with him? The answer was already there, already cemented in reality. Without Ana, he would’ve lost everything. “I warned you what would happen if you agreed to a sleepover. You knew the risks going in, Agent Ramirez.”
“Like I said, it’s hard to say no to her,” she said.
Benning slipped his hand into hers as she struggled to retrace her steps through the snow on her injured leg, and in that moment he found himself never wanting to let go. “Wait until she asks you to let her drive your SUV.”
Chapter Eleven
This whole investigation would be easier if the evidence spelled out who’d taken Owen Reeves from this very house. Ana studied the official crime scene photos taken of the charm JC had recovered from Jo West’s body disposal site. She and Benning had stayed up most of the night reviewing the employee list from Britland Construction, but none of the names—no matter how many times she’d read them—had jumped out at either of them. No criminal charges other than a few speeding tickets, no massive amounts of debt or visible connection to the Samantha Perry case either of them could see. From the outside it looked as though Britland Construction hired the best and most trustworthy assets despite the negligence Benning had uncovered and the skull he’d pulled from one of their project walls.
She’d gone over the interviews she and her partner had conducted seven years ago during the Samantha Perry case, searching the transcripts, rereading the file over and over until the words had started blurring together. Director Pembrook confirmed Samantha’s best friend, Claire Winston, was currently serving her country in Afghanistan with her military unit and still wore the bracelet the friends had exchanged in high school while she was off duty. The charm had to belong to the teenage girl Ana hadn’t been able to save, the one whose case had changed everything. It had to. It was too much of a coincidence for it to be random.
“There has to be something here.” She fought to keep her eyes open, her entire body giving in to the exhaustion she’d been ignoring for the past three days. But she couldn’t sleep. The kidnapper’s twenty-four-hour deadline had expired. They should’ve uncovered a lead by now. Should’ve heard from the bastardo who’d taken Benning’s son. But there’d been nothing. Tears burned in her eyes as defeat clawed through her. The all-too-familiar sinking sensation she’d worked hard to bury since she’d requested a transfer to Washington broke through her defenses. She had to find Owen, needed to find the boy who’d topped each of these cabinet pulls with carrots in that photo next to his father’s bed. Because if she couldn’t do this... If she couldn’t bring that little boy home, it would destroy the man who’d worked past her defenses and given her a glance at what real happiness could look like. And she’d lose him all over again.
The thought sparked a chain reaction of disbelief and rage. She stilled, but her heart raced out of control. Three days. That was all it’d taken for Benning to put her right back in the same position she’d been in when she’d received the call that Samantha Perry’s body had been recovered. She’d become emotionally involved. Attached. Blind to the evidence right in front of her. She’d broken her own rule to keep her distance and fallen in love with the idea she wouldn’t have to leave. But if she couldn’t find Owen, his small, perfect family would be the ones who paid the price.
She shoved the stack of papers off the kitchen island with every ounce of anger and frustration and disappointment building inside, but spun too fast and stretched the stitches in her side. Pain spread fast, the air rushing out of her, and she had to catch herself before the gray wood-like tile throughout the kitchen rushed up to meet her. Bent over the bar stool, she clamped onto her side as the stinging dulled. She couldn’t breathe, let alone think. “What have I done?”
Strong hands slid along her spine, and she twisted around to fight as his arms secured her against his muscled chest. No. She couldn’t break. Not in front of him. The bullet wound beneath her collarbones protested as she pushed away from him, but he only held her tighter as the sobs broke past her control. Her knees threatened to give out, but he was there. Lending her his strength, letting her take what she needed from him. She fisted her unbroken fingers into his shirt as tremors racked through her. “What am I missing?”
Benning stared down at her, not an ounce of blame or hatred in his expression, only sympathy. And suddenly the agent she’d been fighting so hard to become shattered into a thousand pieces right in the middle of his kitchen. The hurt, the loss, the grief, the anger she’d had to live with each and every day broke through. She felt it all—everything she’d been trying to hide over the years—in a matter of seconds until her body couldn’t take it anymore. He’d been right before. Detaching herself from feeling anything for the people she cared about had been tearing her apart, and she didn’t know how to fix it. The tears streaked down her face as the truth she’d been holding on to for so long bubbled to the surface. “I couldn’t save them. My sister, Samantha. I...failed.”
“But you did everything you could, Ana,
and that’s what matters.” He bent at the knees, scooping her into his arms, and it was then she’d noticed he wasn’t wearing his arm sling. He was at risk of doing more damage to his shoulder, but he kept his attention focused on her. Always on her. The main level of his house passed in a blur as he carried her down the hall and into his bedroom. Laying her in his bed, his hands trailed to her boots, and he unlaced each one before discarding them onto the floor. Slowly, carefully. Treating her as though she were glass. Had anyone taken such care with her before? The mattress dipped as he took position beside her, his gaze centered on her. “You’ve been so focused on saving everybody else. But who’s going to be there for you when you need it?”
She didn’t know what to say, what to think. The Tactical Crime Division—JC, Evan, Smitty, Davis, all of them—had become a large part of her life over the past year since Director Pembrook had requested her reassignment from missing persons, but there were still pieces of her she kept hidden from her team. From everyone. Her parents, her three brothers, the friends she’d cut from her life. Any one of them would race to help if she asked, but she didn’t deserve their support. Not after what she’d done. He traced her jawline with callused fingers, and right then she couldn’t escape the feeling he might know her better than she knew herself. In ways no one else had. “I...”
He leaned into her, pressing his mouth to her forehead as she slid her hand around his wrist, begging him not to leave. Closing her eyes, she reveled in his touch, in the way he always smelled of pine and outdoors, in how he made her feel wanted and strong and beautiful.
Trailing a path of soft kisses to her temple, then lower toward her ears, he brushed his beard against her oversensitized skin, and she shuddered. “Let me be that man who can be there for you, Ana. Tell me what you need. Don’t think about it. Tell me what you need right now.”
Midnight Abduction (Tactical Crime Division Book 3) Page 13
