by Cole, Fiona
That had me pulling up straight, my spine stiffening at the slew of issues that bombard my brain.
All of a sudden, my door flew open, and my dad’s salt and pepper head popped through. “Meeting in a couple of minutes,” he muttered, barely giving me any attention.
When I didn’t immediately respond, he stopped and gave me a second glance. His eyes narrowed as he took in the scene.
Move. Stop standing there like an idiot and move. Swipe all evidence from your desk you dumb, hormonal, pregnant woman.
My mind could be a bitch—but a correct bitch.
If I thought he was scowling before at my damp eyes and rigid posture, it had nothing on when he caught sight of the pregnancy test sitting proudly on my desk.
“What the hell is that?” He pushed the door fully open and pointed an accusing finger. Still, I stood there. “Carina!”
I jumped when he barked my name, and I dropped my gaze to where he pointed like I was hoping to find something else—like maybe he hadn’t seen the pregnancy test and was asking me about the pen that looked like lipstick. No such luck. Still a white stick with two pink lines.
“Oh, um…I…um—”
“Does Jake know?”
“What?” That brought me out of my stupor. Why the hell would Jake need to know? Then it hit me; my dad thought Jake was the father. Despite Jake being engaged to a man now.
I almost laughed. Almost.
Then I almost choked on that laughter when the man himself appeared beside my father, all playful smile and sparkling blue eyes, unprepared for the category ten disaster happening.
“Does Jake know what?”
“That.”
Jake took in my father’s glower, stepping into the office to follow the direction of my father’s finger. His brows rose to his hairline, and his jaw dropped. “Oh, ummm…”
“How could you do this to her,” my father accused.
“Jesus, Dad. No. It’s not Jake’s.” I directed an apologetic look to Jake who was still looking at me like I’d told him I just made a quick trip to Mars and back while he blinked.
“Then who’s the hell baby is it?”
“Dad—”
“I didn’t even realize you were serious with anyone.”
He started pacing, not even willing to hear me anymore, muttering rationalizations on how I could have gotten pregnant, and not have introduced the man to my father. He could be so old-fashioned, completely oblivious to his daughter having a one-night stand.
He froze in the middle of his pacing and faced me, shoulders back. “I want to meet him. I’m not happy that you’re not married, but we can fix that.”
And back to pacing and muttering about weddings. I looked to Jake for help, because despite our broken engagement, he was still my partner in crime. But even he was at a loss for words, his eyes tracking up and down my body like a baby would pop out at any second.
The amount of ignorant testosterone in the room grated on my already fragile nerves, and I snapped.
Slapping my hands on my desk, I halted my father’s pacing. “I’m not dating anyone.”
“But that’s impossible.”
“Are you serious, right now?”
His eyes searched mine almost begging for another answer. I got where he was coming from. I did. My mother was a less than…lady-like woman. They both tried to fit together when they found out she was pregnant with me, but it didn’t work. In the end, she left, unable to put anyone above herself.
He didn’t want that for me and raised me with structure and discipline. Getting pregnant on a one-night stand was about as far from disciplined as you could get.
“Dad…”
“We have a meeting to get to,” he said, cutting me off. “We’ll discuss this later.” And with that he stormed out, gesturing for Jake to follow.
I stared down at the offending plastic before shoving it in my purse with a disgusted scoff. I’d deal with it later. My father was right, I had a meeting to get to, and work was something I was damn good at, and could control.
At least, I tried to.
My father went over the basics, seeking my opinion on everything, but delegating the biggest tasks to the men in the room. Each job that he passed me over for had my jaw clenching tighter and tighter. My father had groomed me for this position, made me strong enough to stand strong against any man in the business world, letting me know that as a woman I’d be looked down on—doubted and second-guessed.
But his fear of me being disregarded made him into one of the men that doubted me the most. I was his sharpest tool that he never used. Until I forced him to.
“Carina, please make sure you bring Mr. Kent’s paperwork to my office before you go,” he directed as the rest of the team filed out. “I’ll set up a meeting to discuss what steps need to happen next.”
“A meeting has already occurred, and plans are already in motion.”
“I told you I wanted to be brought in on this.”
“No, you said you wanted me to hand it over, and I told you that I’ve got it. Mr. Kent has made it clear that he is happy with my services.”
“But he’s not even using the full business team we offer.”
“Because he doesn’t need it.”
“Carina…” he sighed, dragging his hand through his hair. He already knew what I was going to say, but it didn’t stop me.
“Wellington and Russo is missing a big profit by not offering an individual marketing plan. Established businesses don’t need the analytics and restructuring. They need to expand to different locations that have different markets while still using their tried and true infrastructure. Just like Kent Holdings and his hotel expansions.”
He waved his hand, like my idea was a pesky fly that wouldn’t go away and stood to leave. “We don’t have time for this. Especially in your condition.”
“Dad, you’re not—” I rarely called him dad at work, but the room was empty besides Jake and me.
“You and Jake make a good team, and right now, it will stay that way.”
A low growl vibrated from my chest at his retreating back.
“Are you okay?” Jake asked from beside me.
I took a deep, cleansing breath, trying to expand the tightness restricting my lungs. “Yeah. He just pisses me off so much. He knows how good I am, but he still talks down to me.”
My muscles eased a fraction more when Jake’s hand slid over mine, giving a light squeeze. “You know I’m here for you if you ever need me. As your friend, not just your business partner.”
I turned my hand so I could squeeze his in return, giving a grateful smile. “Thank you.”
“As your business partner, I support you one-hundred-percent on your choices. If you decide to keep working on the Bergamo and Brandt project without informing your father, I back you.” I jerked my wide eyes to his. I may have been taking on clients under the table, so to speak, but I didn’t think anyone knew. “It passed my desk a few weeks ago, and I signed whatever needed signing,” he said with a smirk. “I believe in your ideas, Carina. And we are the future of Wellington and Russo. But right now, we don’t need to convince your father on an individual branch to continue with your plans. We can tackle that when things settle down. Until then, I’m by your side.”
A pinch squeezed my chest because the jaded part of me wanted to retort how he wasn’t on my side anymore. Instead, I leaned in and pressed a kiss to my friend’s cheek. “Thank you, Jake.”
He was right. We were the future of this company. Unfortunately, Jake came into his position of power earlier than me when his father died. But when my father retired, I’d take over his position, and I just had to bide my time to get what I knew was for the best.
“Now, get out of here before your father tries to corner you about the pregnancy again.”
I groaned. “I just found out myself. I can’t deal with him on top of it.”
“Are you okay?”
I froze at his serious tone. Slowly, I slid my b
ag over my shoulder and looked down at the man who used to be my whole world. It was amazing how much could change in less than a year. Now, I had a small speck of a bean growing inside me, and that deserved all of me—that deserved to be my whole world. As much as I didn’t want to admit it, my father was right about the timing. I needed to focus my attention on the task at hand.
“Yeah,” I answered with a slow smile. “I think I’m going to be great.”
I finished grabbing my belongings and rushed from the office. It was already after five, so today would be a rare day that I left before dinner.
When I got home, I grabbed my mail. A large manila envelope was crammed into my box. I scanned the delivery address as I locked the box up again. Curiosity got the best of me, and I tore into the envelope before the elevator doors closed. As soon as a dark head pressed over a naked breast caught my eyes, I quickly shoved the photos back into the file and clung tight to the package.
The elevator seemed to stop on every floor, and the photos burned hot in my hands. As soon as the doors opened on my floor, I ran down to my apartment and slammed the door behind me, tearing the photos from the folder.
In my haste, they scattered at my feet, like a black and white collage of the day I got pregnant. A CD case fell out last, but I ignored it. Instead, I dropped to my knees and my eyes glued to the top photo I hadn’t even realized had been taken. In my memory of the date, the photographer had never been there. It had just been Ian and me in that room. It had just been Ian on top of me, kissing me, touching me, making me hot, making me annoyed.
I forgot when he made me laugh.
But this photo had his smile buried in my neck, my head tossed back, and my mouth open on a laugh. I looked happier than I could remember. He looked happy. I pushed it aside to reveal the next one; my face tilted up to his, with my eyes closed. He stared down at me with a look of reverence and adoration I hadn’t felt in almost a year.
Tears burned the backs of my eyes again, and I knew I had to find him. I needed to do this with him.
I scrambled through the photos to find the shipping information. It took me three tries to type in the number for the photographer, hoping she’d give me his information. It rang three more times before someone picked up.
“Hello?”
“Hello, Sarah? You may not remember me. My name is Carina, and I was one of your clients. I’m looking for the name of the date that I had—”
“I’m so sorry,” she interrupted. “This keeps happening. Apparently, the person you’re trying to reach—Sarah—isn’t around anymore. She bailed and totally ghosted on her rent last month. I bought the location a couple weeks ago and ended up with the same number.”
My mouth flopped open like a fish out of water. “Ummm…do you know how to reach her?”
“No. But I’m sure the owner of the building sure as hell wished he did. Missing that money.”
“Oh. Umm. Okay. Thank you.”
“Sorry. Hope you find what you’re looking for.”
“Me too.”
I hung up and sat there, wondering what the hell to do next.
On a whim, I typed Cincinnati and Ian into Google on an off chance that maybe something familiar would pop up. By the time I had finished scrolling, my feet were numb from where I sat on them.
More tears burned the backs of my eyes, and frustration grew. I shoved the pictures aside and took deep breaths. I wasn’t a weak woman, and I wasn’t going to sit there crying over being pregnant and alone.
I rested my hand on my stomach. “It’s just you and me, peanut.”
Nausea hit me, and I frantically crawled to the hall bathroom and emptied the small lunch I’d managed to eat.
Even panting and sweating, I was confident.
I was Carina Russo. I was going to kick pregnancy’s ass.
Once I picked myself up off the bathroom floor.
4 Carina
Six and a half months later
My stomach bounced under my palm resting there, as the elevator ascended. “It’s just an elevator, baby. No need to get riled up.”
I did that a lot, talked to the baby. I read that it was good for them to hear your voice, and since it was mostly just Peanut and me, he or she would be coming out very familiar with me. I smiled again when another kick landed against my rubbing hand. I’d just reached eight months, and I’d popped.
Thankfully, the black stretchy dress still fit over my bump, and I was able to dress it up with my mustard jacket, that used to be slouchy. Not so much anymore. The doors opened on the top floor of Bergamo and Brandt, and I winced when I stood upright. I needed to invest in a pair of dressy flats. The stilettos made me feel powerful, but now I just felt like a watermelon balancing on a toothpick with each step.
Another kick and I stopped to soothe Peanut. “Time to calm down now. Mommy has a meeting, and the last thing I need is a swift kick to the lungs in the middle of talking.”
In response, more kicks happened in quick succession. I narrowed my eyes at my stomach like Peanut could see me. “I can already tell you’re going to be just as stubborn as me. But we’ll blame any bad habits on your father.”
I felt no shame since he wouldn’t be there to defend himself.
A pinch in my chest still lingered when I thought about Ian, but months of accepting I was doing this alone eased it to a barely there whisper of an ache. I hated that I couldn’t find him, but it was like a needle in the proverbial haystack, and in the end, I would make it through, like I always did.
Rolling my shoulders back, I walked deeper into the office, greeting the secretary. “Hello, Laura. I’m here to see Erik.”
I’d been visiting Bergamo and Brandt since earlier in the year as a little side project. They wanted to open an office in London and reached out to Wellington and Russo for assistance. Since we’d already helped them set up their current business almost eight years ago, they didn’t need a whole team like they had before. No, they needed me and what I wanted to offer. So, without really discussing it with my father, I supplied them with a marketing plan completely created by yours truly. A damn good one, if I said so myself.
Jake helped out a few times when I needed to run numbers and analytics, but he didn’t need to waste time away from other projects that needed his full attention. So, he signed when required, and we hadn’t brought my father on.
“Look at you.” Laura beamed, taking in my belly. “You’re radiant, Carina.”
“I’m sweating,” I deadpanned, making her laugh. “Why the hell is it so hot in September?”
“Because you’re pregnant. It’s the law that all things to make you uncomfortable will happen in the last trimester.”
I rolled my eyes but shared a laugh with the older woman. She’d had three kids of her own, so she was kind enough to listen to me whenever I came in.
“I’ll let him know you’re here,” she said, picking up the phone. A moment later, she let me know to go on in.
I opened the door, and my eyes first locked on Erik rounding his desk. I saw others in my periphery in the seating area around a coffee table and remembered today would be a full team meeting.
“Hey, Carina. Can we get you anything to drink?” Erik asked, placing a gentle kiss on my cheek. We’d become close over the past few months of working together—friends. I’d also become close to his girlfriend, Alexandra, who gave a smile and a wave on her way to the couch. At least, as close as I let people get these days.
I opened my mouth to accept some water when a voice had me choking on my words.
“Carina?” A deep voice croaked my name, pulling my eyes to the others on the couch.
Dark hair pushed back, and the most startling gray eyes I’d never forget, even if I tried.
Holy shit.
“Ian?”
What were the odds? What were the freaking odds?
“You two know each other?”
My gaze jerked to the petite brunette sitting pressed to Ian’s side. Hanna Brandt, Erik’
s little sister who worked in another department on the floor below. Her eyes were wide and scanned my body, resting on my stomach. It wasn’t anything she hadn’t seen before, but as she looked between Ian and me, probably connecting the dots, it took on a hint of worry I’d never seen before.
I looked back to Ian to find his eyes widening as they took me in. My hand rested possessively on my stomach like I could hide the giant belly from his accusing eyes. If he looked shocked before, it was nothing compared to his jaw-dropping gawk now.
“What the hell is that?” he asked like he saw an alien poke out from under my dress.
The silence was deafening as I struggled for words. What did one say in a moment like this? Surprise? Congratulations? Adios?
I was saved from saying anything when someone else entered behind me. “What did I miss?” Jared, the lead IT analyst at the company, asked. He froze next to me and took in the sight of everyone frozen and slack-jawed.
Alexandra spoke up for the first time, her tone hinting at restrained humor. “I think Carina was just about to explain to Ian where babies come from.”
Jared’s face screwed up. “What?”
Ian scooted to the end of the couch, his eyes narrowed, not leaving my stomach like he was struggling to do the hardest math problem of his life.
It must have clicked for Jared because in the next instant he was laughing. “Oh, shit. This is good.”
Both Ian and I glared at Jared, who sobered quickly, coughing into his hand. “Sorry. It’s just…kind of funny.”
“Shut the fuck up,” Ian growled.
When Jared went to speak again, I cut him off before this could go any further. “Anyways, we can talk later,” I said with a forced jovial voice. I adjusted my jacket and gave my most authoritative tone, not allowing an inch for argument. “Let’s get this meeting started.”
“Always in control,” Ian muttered under his breath.
I was hit with a familiar feeling—annoyance at his constant need to have the last word. There I’d been fantasizing about finding him and sharing the pregnancy with him, romanticizing the looks in the pictures I had, and in less than ten minutes I was reminded of how much he annoyed me. Sure, it made me want to snap back, which kind of got me hot, but lately, my hormones had been swinging into horny territory, so I shoved it down and ignored his comment.
