Tan Lines: Sand, Surf, and Secrets / Rays, Romance, and Rivalry / Beaches, Boys, and Betrayal

by Katherine Applegate

  “The ‘wrong way’ being—?”

  “You know. Summer dumps me, so I grab the nearest phone and call Bachelorette Number Two.”

  “Yeah, I have to admit that’s pretty much how it would have looked.”

  “But that wasn’t why I was going to call. I was going to say, you know, I was sorry. I think I pretty much treated you like crap, Diana.”

  “Well, I wasn’t exactly a saint,” she admitted. She cocked her head, smiling at him a little. “So what brought on this revelation?”

  Seth shrugged. “I don’t know. I guess I wasn’t even really surprised yesterday. About Summer, I mean. I was holding out hope, but I kind of knew. And as I was sitting there, listening to her tell me it was over, I sort of flashed on how you must have felt this summer, hoping maybe you and I would…you know. Work things out.”

  “You’ve always been pretty straight with me, Seth. I knew the deal. I knew you were in love with Summer.” Diana sighed. “I just didn’t want to believe it. I wanted to pretend things were different. Sometimes it’s more fun pretending than it is just letting go.”

  “Yeah.” Seth nodded. “But it hurts worse when you finally do let go. It hurts like major hell.”

  Diana rose to her feet. “Well, I just wanted to say good-bye.”

  Seth slung his duffel bag over his shoulder. “I’ll run into you one of these days, I’m sure. Maybe at Christmas, who knows?” He stood. “Maybe sooner.”

  Diana stared at the floor. She wanted to touch him one last time, but she knew it would just be one more awkward moment in a long string of them.

  On the other hand, what did she have to lose? She’d already lost Seth.

  Diana reached for him and hung on longer than she knew she should have. She put her lips to his ear.

  The words were out before she had time to stop them.

  “Did you even love me a little?” she whispered.

  Instantly she was sorry. It was an awful, humiliating, desperate thing to say. She knew so much better.

  She let go and turned away quickly so Seth wouldn’t see her face. But he caught her arm and pulled her back to him.

  “You know I did,” he said, almost angrily. “Did you?”

  Diana’s breath caught.

  Tell the truth.

  If she could just tell Seth the truth this once…“Put it this way,” she said at last. “I’m not quite ready to stop pretending.”

  When she left the bus station, Diana drove straight to Adam’s. He was waiting for her on the front porch when she pulled up.

  “How about a walk?” he said as she got out of the car.

  “Where’s Summer?”

  “After you called, I told her she could have the day off. I think she went over to town.”

  Diana took the handles of his wheelchair. “How do you push this thing?”

  “It’s motorized,” Adam said, zipping past her down the ramp and into the driveway. He stopped and turned to face her, his smile almost hidden in the layers of bandages. “I know how you love to control things, Diana. Sorry.”

  Diana fell into step beside him. The day was crystalline, almost too bright.

  “So,” Adam said softly, “what gave it away?”

  “The ring. I was there at Ross’s birthday party when your dad gave it to him. Remember?”

  Adam groaned. “Now I do. Damn, I should have known. I figured Summer wouldn’t recognize it, since she barely knew Ross and he hardly ever wore the ring.” He held out his hand. “It is kind of ostentatious. But I’ve worn it ever since Ross died, and I didn’t feel right about taking it off. Don’t ask me why.”

  “How long did you think you could keep up this charade, Adam? Summer was bound to find out eventually.”

  “I know, I know. It just…it just happened. I was already using a fake name, and then when she walked through the door that day to apply for the job, it was too good to be true. I had a little part of my old life back, you know?”

  They turned toward the beach, going as far as Adam dared with the wheelchair. Diana sat beside him in the hot, sugar-fine sand.

  “I knew your dad pretty well,” she said. “And I hated him for the way he treated me after the stuff with Ross. But I have a hard time believing even the almighty Senator Merrick could dump you here under an assumed name when you were in this”—she gestured toward him with her hand—“this condition. I mean, sure, he didn’t mind trying to destroy me if it meant saving his rear. But you’re his son, Adam. I thought loyalty was everything to the Merrick clan.” She couldn’t leave a trace of bitterness out of her voice. “After all, when I needed you, Adam, you chose Ross over me.”

  Awkwardly Adam twisted his body toward her. The bandages forced her to look directly into his eyes—it was as if there were nowhere else to look. And his eyes were so sad, it was almost more than Diana could stand.

  “Yes, we’ve always been big on loyalty,” Adam said. “But I guess even the almighty Senator Merrick couldn’t put a good press spin on Ross and me. One son drunk and drowned. The other one nearly dead and also, for the record, quite drunk most of the time. Talk about your family values.” Adam made a soft sound, like a laugh dissolving into a sob. “I guess you think I got what I deserved, huh, Diana? Poetic justice to the max.”

  “No. I don’t hate you anymore, Adam. The truth is, what your family did to me made me stronger. I wouldn’t wish it on anyone, but I’m still here. I survived, and I’m tougher for it.”

  She hesitated, watching the waves come and go. Gently, slowly, she reached for his left hand and held it, covering Ross’s ring. “You’ll be stronger, too, when this is over.”

  “Maybe.”

  “You have to tell Summer, you know.”

  “I know. I’ve known all along. I just hate to see her quit, it was so nice having her around. Like going back in time.” He paused. “She will leave, won’t she?”

  “It’s hard to say. Summer’s okay. She might just stick around.”

  Adam closed his fingers around hers. “How about you? You think you might, you know…stop back and say hi now and then?”

  “I don’t know, Adam,” Diana said honestly. “I’m strong, but I’m not sure I’m strong enough to forget everything that happened.”

  “That’s okay. I don’t blame you.”

  “Maybe, though,” Diana added softly.

  They started back toward the house. When she reached her car, Diana paused. “So you’ll tell her soon?”

  “Soon, I promise. I just want to hang on to the illusion a little longer, okay?”

  Diana nodded. “I understand. As it happens, I’m pretty good at make-believe myself.”

  24

  You Can Go Home Again

  After Jared gave her the day off, Summer spent a couple of hours just walking the beach, trying her best not to think too much. There was only one place she wanted to go, but it wasn’t really home, not anymore.

  After a while she headed for town. When she peeked through the window of Jitters, the café was nearly empty. Austin was wiping down a table.

  She pushed open the door. “Table for one,” she said, “if you can squeeze me in. I don’t have a reservation.”

  “Right this way, mademoiselle.”

  He seated Summer by the window, then straddled a chair across from her. “You’re looking radiant,” he said.

  “I’m feeling pretty radiant, actually.”

  “Marquez told me how things went down with Diver. I’m glad.”

  “I couldn’t have done it without your apartment.”

  “Hey, I got my laundry folded. Too bad it was dirty.”

  “Eww.”

  “Just kidding. I think.”

  She reached into her pocket. “Before I forget. Your key.”

  “Maybe you should keep it. Just in case we decide to cohabit.”

  “Maybe I shouldn’t.”

  “Hey, it was worth a shot.” Austin lowered his voice. “By the way, Blythe told me Caroline’s developed this
sudden, inexplicable desire to head back to college early.”

  “Good. She’ll be close by in case the cops need to question her. Diver’s flying up to Virginia at the end of the week to work things out. My dad’s paying for the ticket and meeting him there.” She smiled. “Strange. It may do more to help cement their relationship than all those awkward father-son football tosses in our backyard.”

  “So.” Austin crossed his arms. “Any other reason for the radiance?”

  Summer reached into her purse and passed Austin her acceptance letter. He smiled broadly as he read it.

  “Congratulations. I’m not surprised, of course. This is the right thing for you, Summer.”

  “I hope so.” She put the letter away. “I’m scared to death. I’m going solo. No spotters. No net.”

  “You’ll have friends nearby.” Austin gazed at her, suddenly serious. “You’ll have me.”

  “I’ve been thinking a lot about that, Austin,” Summer said. “I—I told Seth good-bye. I told him I loved you.”

  “A wise choice indeed. I knew you’d come to your—”

  “I also told him,” Summer pressed on, “that I need to be by myself for a while. I need to figure out who I am and know I can get by on my own. To not be part of a couple. Not Summer and Austin. Just Summer.”

  Austin gazed at her, his face solemn, slowly, almost imperceptibly nodding.

  “It’s funny,” Summer said, trying to fill the quiet with words, “when I first came here to the Keys, all I wanted in the world was to be part of a couple. I thought that was the only thing that mattered in the whole world. I still think it matters. Being in love is the most wonderful”—she smiled—“and the most wonderfully frustrating thing in the world. But I think it only works if you know what you want out of life. So you don’t get lost in the other person.”

  She paused. Austin was still staring at her. “Well?” she said.

  “Well, I want to tell you that you’ve just made a really lousy decision,” Austin replied. “But I’m not going to. Because although it really hurts to admit this, Summer, I think you’re probably right.” He smiled, a slow smile that started at the corners of his mouth. “I think it’s cool that you’re brave enough to go solo for a while. And to do it at a place like Carlson, a place that scares you. It’s the kind of thing that just makes me love you that much more.” He laced his fingers behind his head, surveying her with affectionate annoyance. “Which is a drag, you see. I love you because you’re stubborn and willful and independent, but of course it’s exactly those qualities that are getting in the way of me sweeping you off your feet with my incredible charm.”

  “Oh, you swept me pretty good, Austin.”

  “This is just for a while, right? This isn’t like some freaky hermit thing where you’ve sworn off human companionship till the end of time?”

  “I’m sure we’ll still run into each other. Even freaky hermits go to the movies now and then.”

  Austin sighed. “I told myself I would leave this in the hands of fate. And it appears fate has spoken. That bastard really gets on my nerves sometimes.” He leaned across the table and kissed her sweetly. “But I can wait. I have a whole lot of Baywatches on DVD. And I figure you’ll come to your senses eventually.”

  “It could happen.” She stood. “Hey, before I go, could you load me up with three sticky buns and three orange juices to go?”

  “Sure. Where are you off to?”

  Summer smiled. “In search of some human companionship.”

  The apartment was quiet. Diana’s door was closed, and so was Marquez’s. Summer put the food from Jitters on the kitchen counter. She made as much noise as possible, searching for plates and forks.

  Both doors opened at the same time.

  “Summer?” Marquez cried.

  “Summer?” Diana said. “What are you doing here?”

  Summer placed the plates on the coffee table. “Hey, I paid a third of the rent—I have rights.”

  “Are you moving back in?” Marquez asked hopefully.

  Summer shrugged. “I just wanted a little company, is all. Girl talk.” She smiled. “Human companionship.”

  “And Diana came to mind?” Marquez sneered.

  Summer sat cross-legged on the floor and grabbed a fork. She patted the couch. “Come on, you guys. They’re still warm. Sit.”

  Diana and Marquez looked at each other warily.

  “I promise to intervene if there’s a significant loss of blood,” Summer said. “Come on. Let’s just hang out and talk. Like the old days.”

  “I don’t know,” Diana said, leaning against the counter. “It’s been a long, hard summer. What can we all possibly agree on to talk about that won’t lead to armed combat?”

  “Guys?” Marquez suggested.

  “No way,” Diana and Summer said at the same moment.

  “Food?” Summer suggested, holding up her plate.

  “Pass,” Marquez said.

  “I have an idea,” Diana said. “Let’s talk about this fall. I caught another roach this morning the size of Nevada. I love this apartment, but if Summer’s going to be at Carlson, and Marquez and I are going to be right down the road at FCU, I was thinking maybe we could look for something a little less roach infested when our lease is up….” Her voice trailed off. “Sorry. We’re not exactly ready for that, are we?”

  Summer looked at Marquez. She looked at Diana. She smiled.

  “Go get the want ads,” she said.

  About the Author

  After Katherine Applegate graduated from college, she spent time waiting tables, typing (badly), watering plants, wandering randomly from one place to the next with her boyfriend, and just generally wasting her time. When she grew sufficiently tired of performing brain-dead minimum-wage work, she decided it was time to become a famous writer. Anyway, a writer. Writing proved to be an ideal career choice, as it involved neither physical exertion nor uncomfortable clothing, and required no social skills.

  Ms. Applegate has written more than one hundred books under her own name and a variety of pseudonyms. She has no children, is active in no organizations, and has never been invited to address a joint session of Congress. She does, however, have an evil, foot-biting cat named Dick, and she still enjoys wandering randomly from one place to the next with her boyfriend.