Southern Secrets

by Madison, Natasha

  "Go get your things," he says, and I nod at him, getting out of the truck and allowing the tears to come. Better now, when I’m alone, than in front of everyone. I unlock and open the door, the cold air hitting me, and I can smell him in the air. I close the door behind me softly and head to my bedroom.

  I stop at the doorway and look at the room, the bed still a mess from this afternoon. I walk in and smell him all around me. The woodsy smell that only he gives out, the smell that made me feel so fucking safe.

  I bend to pick up his T-shirt on the floor beside the bed and bring it to my nose. The sob comes through me when I sit on the bed. I’m shocked and stunned. Never would I have imagined this. Never would I have thought that he would be the one to do this to me. To lie to me.

  I look over at the side table, seeing his stuff on there, and my hand goes to my stomach. I look over at the corner of the room where his stuff is on the chair. He’s everywhere I look, and I know that I have to get out of here.

  I walk to the closet and grab a bag when I hear the front door open and slam shut. My hands shake when I hear the footsteps come closer and closer, the bag dropping on the floor.

  I turn to walk out of the closet when I see him standing there at the entrance to the bedroom. I look at him, and my heart shatters in my chest. I was right about one thing. I will not get over him. "Baby," he says, his voice in a whisper, and I shake my head. I hold up my hand, no words coming up over the lump in my throat.

  "Don’t," I finally muster out. "I don’t."

  "Listen to me, please," he says, taking a step into the room. My body aches for his touch, wanting him to put his palm on my cheek and his thumb to wipe away the tears that don’t stop pouring out.

  "There is nothing to say," I say, anger starting to take over. "You’re a liar." Three words I never thought I would say to him.

  "I never lied to you," he says, his voice tight. "Never."

  "Omitting that you were half brothers with Ethan," I say as I step out of my closet, "is the same as fucking lying." I lash out at him.

  "What I told you about myself was the truth," he says. "Everything I told you was my truth."

  "You used my family and me," I say, and it’s his turn to take a step back as if I slapped him across the face. "You came here knowing who you were and who we were." I shrug my shoulders. "I was just a stupid girl who fell in love with you." I shake my head. "Or was that a lie, too? You know, get more into the family before you told us who you really were."

  "Nothing," he hisses. "Nothing between us was a lie. I love you, Amelia. I love you with every fucking bone in my body. I love you with every fiber of my being. I love you with every breath I take." I ignore the way my body wants to go to him. I ignore the pull of his words. I ignore it all. "You don’t think it killed me every single day waking up next to you having this on my mind."

  "Well, obviously not enough to let you tell me the truth." I swallow the pain in my chest, the burning in my stomach starts to grow. The fear of breaking down in front of him, making the back of my neck burn. He doesn’t deserve to see you fall, I tell myself. "I did it again," I say, my voice trembling no matter how much I fight it off. The tears come, and I have no more energy left to stop them. All I know is that I have to get out of here before I crumple, and he doesn’t get to have that. He doesn’t get to see that he broke me. I listened to my heart, and I only have myself to blame. I walk to the doorway and look at him. "Take your shit and get out of my house." I walk right past him toward the front door. Every single step, I feel my body get heavier and heavier. I open the door, and Quinn is right there to catch me before I fall.

  "I got you," he says. My eyes just close, and I see black.

  "Bring her in the house." I hear Asher’s voice, the anguish in his tone. "I’m leaving." I hear his footsteps get farther and farther away from me. The sound of the truck door closing and leaving makes my eyes flutter open as I feel myself being carried.

  "I think you passed out," Quinn says, and all I can do is close my eyes. "Sorry, but I had to call Chelsea," he says, walking into my bedroom, and I shake my head.

  "Couch," I say, and he turns to walk back out to the couch. He places me on the couch, and I look at him.

  "He’s gone," Quinn says, looking at me and running a hand through his hair, his face white as if he saw a ghost. He walks over to the kitchen and heads straight to where I keep my grandfather’s special whiskey. He unscrews the top and takes a huge gulp, his eyes closing as it goes down his throat. I know that burn hurts. "He’s …" He shakes his head. "He’s destroyed." I’m about to say something, and he holds up his hand. "I’m not on his side," he says right away. "But you didn’t see him."

  "I don’t care." I say the three words that are a lie. I’m a liar just like him. I don’t want to think about it. I can’t think about it.

  The sound of running and the door opening have me looking to the side to see Chelsea there. "What happened?" she asks, rushing over to me, turning to look at Quinn. "Did you get her a cold rag for her to put on her neck?" He shakes his head. "What the fuck have you been doing?" she says, totally unaware of what just went on. "Why are you drinking?"

  "It’s over." I look at her, and her mouth opens and then closes. "It’s a long story."

  "It’s a fucked-up story," Quinn says from the kitchen, drinking another shot. "It’s the story that you never expect to hear, and then you hear it, and you look around wondering, did I just hear what he said." He closes his eyes. "It’s like Twilight Zone kind of thing."

  Chelsea gets up and looks at him like he has two fucking heads. "Asher is Liam’s son," I say

  the words, and her face turns white. Her mouth opens, then closes again. "Exactly."

  "Did he know?" she asks, putting her hand to her stomach, neither of us answering her. So she looks at us again. "Did he know when he came here?" Again we just look at each other and Chelsea sits on the couch next to me. "Does Ethan know?" she asks, and I nod my head.

  "I need," I say. "I need to pack his stuff." I turn to get off the couch. "He needs his stuff."

  "We need to burn his stuff," Chelsea says, and Quinn laughs.

  "Again." He shakes his head when Chelsea gasps out. "Too soon."

  "I’m fine." I get up and sit back down when the room spins. Chelsea gets up and holds out her hand. "I’m fine. I just got up too fast," I say, and she doesn’t move.

  "I’ll help you there, and then you can do your thing," she says, and I reach out, taking her hand in mine.

  "I feel weird," I say finally. "And I can’t explain it," I say, walking with her into my room. "It’s almost like …"

  "A piece of you is missing," Chelsea says from beside me softly. The tears don’t even warn me this time. They just come, one after another, like a dam being opened. My hand covers my mouth to stop the sob. "You don’t have to do this," Chelsea says from beside me. "Why don’t you do it tomorrow?"

  "No," I say, shaking my head. "I need him gone," I say. "I need to see that all of his stuff is gone." She nods her head at me as I go over to the bed and start ripping off the sheets. "These need to go in the garbage.” I throw my cover on the floor, followed by the sheets. My body shakes but with rage, rage that I let myself fall for someone who hurt me. Rage that I can’t stop thinking about how he is feeling. Rage that all I want to do is ask him to come back. I walk around the bed, grabbing the pillows and also throwing them on the floor.

  I don’t bother to hide the tears when Quinn comes in. He looks at me and then at Chelsea, who just shakes her head. "Leave her."

  "I want it all gone," I tell them both. "I need garbage bags," I say, walking out of the room past both of them and going to the kitchen. Grabbing two from the box, I go back to my room. "Quinn, hold the bag open, and I’ll throw the stuff in it." I shake the garbage bag open. "Chelsea, help me put the stuff in the bag," I say, and she helps me with no questions asked. I grab the other bag and walk around the room, throwing out everything that reminds me of him.

  Pi
cking up the little glass jar that he bought me last week with the two little red roses in them, I throw it into the empty garbage bag, the sound of the glass shattering makes me look up. "It’s funny," I say, looking down at the bag, then up again. "I thought when my heart broke earlier, I would hear it shatter, just like the glass did." I wipe my cheek when Chelsea takes a step forward, and I hold up my hand. "I just want all of his stuff gone so I never have to look at it again," I say, my voice going lower. "The sooner I do that, the sooner I can forget about him."

  Chapter 31

  Asher

  I wait for Quinn to come out of the house, carrying two huge garbage bags. He walks right over to me. "Here," he says, dropping the bags at my feet.

  "What are those?" I ask, looking down at the two bags.

  "The bedding and some stuff she didn’t want," he says, and if my heart wasn’t shattered before, it’s definitely shattered now.

  "How is she doing?" I ask, looking back at the house and seeing that all the lights are off.

  "She went from laughing to crying to throwing shit," he answers honestly. "Chelsea put something in her tea."

  "Fuck." I shake my head. "Is Chelsea staying?" I ask and then hear a car coming. Looking up I see that it’s Mayson. He gets out of the truck, opening the door in the back and grabbing a bag out of it.

  He comes over to us. "Figured you would still be here," he says. "Are you going anywhere?"

  "As long as Liam is out there, I’m not going anywhere," I say, and he nods at me. "I’ll be out here if you need me."

  "Why don’t you go to my place?" Mayson says. "I don’t know how she is going to react if she sees you here."

  "I can’t leave her," I say, looking at them. "What would you do?" They both share a look. "Would you leave Willow?" I ask Quinn.

  "I didn’t even know her name, and I wouldn’t leave her," Quinn says, folding his arms over his chest.

  "And you," I say to Mayson. "Would you leave Chelsea?"

  "Not in this lifetime," he says. "But …" he says, and I say something, and he holds up his hand. "Hear me out. If she comes out here and sees you’re here, it might push her over the edge, and she might never come back."

  "He’s right," Quinn says. "And I never say Mayson is right. It actually physically pains me to say he’s right."

  "I don’t want to hurt her," I say, and they both get it. "What if she wants to see me and I’m not here?"

  "Then I’ll call you, and you can get here in under four minutes," Mayson says and tosses me his keys. "Go, and I swear if anything, and I mean anything, happens, I’ll call you."

  "I can’t go,” I tell them the truth. “I just can’t.”

  “At least hide the truck,” he says, and I nod at him. Quinn turns and goes to his truck and leaves, and I pack the two bags into the truck.

  I spend the night watching the house, wondering if she is okay. I spend the night sitting on the porch, hoping I can get a glimpse of her if she wakes up. When the sun comes up, the front door opens, and I spring out of my chair, my heart beating out of my chest and my hand itching to hold her.

  The door opens, and Chelsea comes out with two cups of coffee in her hand. "Figured you would still be here," she says, handing me a cup.

  "How is she?" I ask, looking over her shoulder, hoping to see her. Hoping to talk to her and tell her how sorry I am. Hoping like fuck she can forgive me somehow.

  "She just went to bed," she says. "She was up all night looking at the ceiling in her bedroom, and then she decided she didn’t want to sleep in her bed. So she got up and tried to sleep on the couch and then didn’t want to lie there." She takes a sip of her coffee. "I’ve never seen her like this. She’s usually the strong one." The burning in my stomach starts to form.

  "The last thing I want to do is hurt her," I tell Chelsea, and she smiles at me sadly.

  "I don’t know how you are going to make her forgive you," she answers me honestly. "But if it matters, I’m rooting for you." I smile sadly. "Not for you but for her. She deserves to be happy. She deserves to have a man by her side who isn’t going to fuck her over. She deserves for someone to carry her burden for once and not that she carries it on her own."

  The lump in my throat forms again, and I know that I’m that man. I’m the man she needs. I want to be that man for her. I would do anything for her. "I’ll die fighting," I say, handing her back the coffee. "I have to go, but I’ll be back."

  "We got her," she says, and her words hurt me more than I can describe, more than I can say.

  I make a pit stop before heading to Jacob’s house. Pulling up at the barn, I can see the light on inside, and I know he’s already here. I get out of the truck, and the tightness in my neck is just as bad as the tightness in my stomach.

  He walks out of the barn with a cup of coffee in his hand. His jeans and plaid shirt are like a uniform with his cowboy hat.

  “Hey, Billy,” I say, and I can see from the way he looks at me that he knows. “I was wondering if you had a minute,” I say, and he just nods his head. “I’m sorry,” I tell him, “for not being honest with you about who I was.”

  “You had your reasons,” Billy says, bringing the cup to his mouth. “Knew you were hiding something.” My eyes search his. “Knew the minute I looked in your eyes. I just didn’t know what it was.”

  “I should have just come out and told you right away,” I admit. “You guys accepted me and gave me more than anyone has ever given to me, and I should have done things differently.”

  “I knew you would tell me eventually.” He smirks. “I didn’t think it would be this.” He takes a sip of his coffee.

  “Go big or go home,” I joke with him and shake my head.

  “You’re a good man, Asher,” he tells me. “Regardless of who shares your blood.”

  “Thank you,” I tell him. “Coming from you, it means everything. She’ll never forgive me.” I wait now, and he takes a deep breath.

  “I reckon with time she will,” he says, but his tone is not convincing. “She didn’t shoot you. That’s a good sign.”

  I shake my head now, knowing I needed this moment right here. “Thank you,” I say. “I don’t think I could ever repay you.”

  “Make it right with her, and we can call it even.” He turns now and walks back into the barn, leaving me looking up at the sky.

  “I’ll die trying,” I say to myself.

  I get in the truck and make my way over to Jacob's house. Ethan is already there sitting on the step, waiting. He gets up when he sees my truck and walks over to me. "You look like shit, brother," he says, and I stop and look at him. "My dad is coming, but um …" he says, and the door opens, and Kallie comes out. I can see that she spent the night pretty much crying because her eyes are puffy and red, and it kills me to know I did that to her. I did it to her daughter. She comes down the stairs with Jacob beside her. "Brace yourself."

  I brace myself for the slap that is going to come. I brace myself for the harsh and vicious words. I brace myself for the wrath of a mother. I’m waiting for it to happen, and she just walks up to me and slowly hugs me. "I’m so so sorry," she whispers and tries not to cry. "No one deserves what happened to you." I’m shocked by her reaction. Not used to anyone caring about me.

  I look over at Ethan and Jacob, who just rubs her back. "He’s fine," Jacob says to her. "Look, he’s healthy and strong."

  She lets me go. "I’m sorry for getting your shirt wet."

  "It’s fine," I say softly.

  "We have to go, Mom, or else we’ll get back late," Ethan says, opening the back of the truck and getting in.

  "Did you sleep last night?" Jacob asks, and I shake my head. "Looks like I’m driving," he says, turning to Kallie. "I’ll see you later."

  I’m turning to get into the truck when I hear the sound of another car. I look up to see Beau arriving. He gets out of his car and comes over to us. "Sorry I’m late," he says, and I just look at him. "Why do you look surprised that I’m here?"

&nbs
p; "I just figured," I say, and he slaps my shoulder with his hand, and he squeezes. "I lied to you guys, and you’d want me gone?"

  "We owe you more than you know," Beau says. "My brother doesn’t know his ass from his elbow, but know that from this day on, you have family.” He smiles at me. “We take care of our own.”

  I don’t say anything to him. Instead, I just nod and walk to the back of the truck. Jacob and Beau get into the truck, and I look out the window. A lone tear runs down my cheek as I watch Kallie wave goodbye.

  When we arrive at the bank, Jacob looks around to make sure that nothing seems out of the norm. We walk into the bank, and the girl at the counter smiles at me. "How can I help you?"

  "I have a safety-deposit box here I’d like to get into," I say, and she asks for my name and then tells me it will just be a minute. She comes back and tells us to follow her. My whole body feels numb. This whole thing is something out of a movie, yet it’s my real life. I step into the room with her, walking to the wall of boxes. She sticks her key in mine, and I take the key out and turn. The long beige box comes out, almost like Pandora’s box. She points me over to a room with a table and four chairs.

  Placing the box on the table, I flip the lid open, and the only thing in there is the envelope. When Ethan sees it, he pulls out a chair and sits down. "Just seeing it again," he says. "Fucks with my head."

  Jacob stands next to him. "He doesn’t have the power," he tells him, and I take the envelope out and hand it to Beau.

  He pulls the letter out that I got. "Is this like yours?" he asks Ethan, and he just scans it and then nods. "I mean, mine said my parents were liars. You didn’t get that part." He continues to read it.

  "What else is in there?" Beau asks, and he opens the letter and looks at the paper and gasps out. The three of us just look at him.