He still wasn’t sure what to do, though. Sitting in the living room felt awkward instead of sexy, even with Landon practically naked and draping himself over the couch. Maybe especially because of that.
Dustin looked around. He was surprised by how warm and welcoming the space was. The walls were a soft yellow and there were picture frames holding dried flowers between two panes of glass. A bookshelf held a diverse collection of books--everything from science fiction to best sellers, as well as a full shelf of non-fiction and another of classic comic books in their plastic sleeves. In between the books nestled carved or lacquered wooden boxes interspersed with succulents in glazed ceramic pots.
The open-plan living room extended into the kitchen, which was clean and organized, but with a colorful clutter of spices and cookbooks. Fresh fruit sat on the counter, with more in a basket hanging overhead.
Dustin realized that he’d been expecting a bit of a bachelor pad--books in milk crates or a desk made out of an old door stacked on top of some cinder blocks. Maybe a ratty couch that had been rescued from a dumpster and spruced up with a slightly stained old sheet. Being in Landon’s space now, he realized that he’d misjudged him, or at least partially.
He was a mature adult with a solid job and a beautiful home. That just wasn’t the vibe that he gave off at the munch. Or, honestly, right now. There was clearly a lot more to him than sex, and Dustin couldn’t figure out why he presented himself this way.
Was it self-empowerment, going for what he wanted? Or was he hiding himself behind nameless encounters?
You like to cook? Dustin finally asked.
Landon laughed nervously, a rough, rasping sound of someone who couldn’t hear himself. That’s what you want to talk about right now? He gestured down at all of the lovely golden skin that he’d put on display.
Yeah, I do. Dustin wasn’t making small talk. He was genuinely curious. What’s your favorite thing to make?
Landon sat up a bit. He shrugged. Usually I just make what’s quick and easy. Either something big like a stew or lasagna that will give me days of leftovers, or a stir fry when I want something fresh for dinner. It’s not much fun cooking for one.
Dustin was starting to get the sense that Landon was more lonely than he wanted to admit. He wanted to know more, but he started with a compliment. That’s very responsible of you. I bet it’s delicious, too.
Landon gave him a shy smile. Had no one complimented him on anything but his body? What about his friends? Do you have friends over much?
I have parties every few months. I love having lots of people over, but it’s too much work to do more often.
I totally agree. Dustin hated large parties, though he could see how Landon would thrive on them. But parties weren’t friends. How about dinner parties? Maybe with a few people? Or movie nights with a friend or two?
Landon slowly shook his head, as though the thought had never occurred to him.
I like to cook with my friend Zhong, Dustin offered. He usually makes the dessert while I make dinner. My ex loved it when he would come over because we’d make all of these elaborate meals.
That sounds nice. Landon looked wistful.
I know you said you don’t want to date, but we could still make dinner together sometime.
Dustin couldn’t figure out all of the expressions on Landon’s face. He looked tense, but beyond that it was a mystery. Maybe he’d been pushing too hard. He was just about to withdraw the offer when Landon replied.
Yeah, I’d like that.
Good. Maybe next weekend or something.
Landon nodded but didn’t commit. And that seemed to be the end of the conversation.
Dustin looked around the room again, knowing that he was stalling but not quite sure how to move things along. I see you like comic books.
To his surprise, Landon looked embarrassed. When he’d asked about cooking it had felt like awkward small talk, but this looked like something much more personal.
Dustin had just been looking for a topic of conversation but now he was intrigued. What’s your favorite? He hadn’t read many comic books since high school, but anyone who kept so many comic books in such good condition had to be a serious collector.
Oh, I read a few different things. Some classics. A few newer things. He shrugged.
Dustin wondered if Landon had been teased before for liking comic books, or if he was just that uncomfortable opening up. He wanted him to feel more comfortable. Like what? What’s your favorite old one and favorite new one?
Landon watched him for a moment, assessing, before answering. For old stuff, maybe X-Men. New stuff, probably Young Avengers.
I haven’t read Young Avengers. I’ll have to check it out. He would, too, if it meant this much to Landon that he wanted to protect it. I always loved Wolverine. He actually couldn’t remember that many characters. There was… Storm, maybe? Professor X. He remembered one of the movies better than the comics, and even then, just had a vague impression of a shape-changing blue woman.
Landon relaxed marginally. Everyone likes Wolverine.
Who’s your favorite X-Men character?
Beast.
Memories slowly trickled back. He’s the quiet, scholarly one with blue fur?
Yeah.
Now that was interesting. Landon was so outgoing that he would have figured he’d choose a similar comic book character. Was that how he saw himself? Academic and serious, but with an appearance that didn’t match? Now that he thought about it, a lot of the books on those shelves indicated a bit of a science nerd, which made sense for a math and science teacher.
I forgot about Beast. He was pretty awesome.
Landon gave him a small smile but didn’t take the bait. Dustin felt a sense of unexpected loss. He hadn’t expected to be instant best friends, and he knew this was just supposed to be a “lesson,” but he really would like to get to know Landon better.
He’d seemed so outgoing at the munch that it was strange to see him acting a bit more defensive here.
Landon eased back on the couch, showing off the long lines of his torso, the graceful length of his legs. It was an unmistakable invitation and completely transformed him from the shy comic book geek back to the flirty man he’d met before.
Landon was just so… sexual, sitting there with all of that gorgeous skin on display. Dustin wouldn’t lie to himself and say that he didn’t want to climb all over him. His muscles were smooth and inviting, his long hair just waiting to be caressed and tugged.
But that confident sexuality was also intimidating. Especially when Dustin was supposed to be taming or controlling it somehow.
Dustin scrambled for something to talk about, but he felt like an idiot even as he was signing it. How was dinner with your family?
Landon looked guilty, though Dustin couldn’t imagine why. Oh, it was great.
How old did you say the kids were?
They’re seven and four years old. The older one is really into Pokémon cards and the younger one wants to be, but he has no idea what he’s talking about. His shoulders were still tense, but his smile was genuine. So, he wasn’t lying about the kids, but he was feeling guilty about something else.
It probably shouldn’t have been Dustin’s business, but everything about Landon had him intrigued. He was a puzzle and Dustin wanted to solve it.
Landon had been so open and friendly this morning, ready to talk about anything. But here in his home, he seemed guarded. And definitely hiding behind sex. He reverted to it whenever things got uncomfortable.
Or maybe he just really didn’t want more than their formal teacher-student relationship. He probably wanted to do their lesson and send Dustin home.
But that nervous evasiveness just made Dustin want to know more. To break through that protective shell and see Landon relax. It sounds like they’re lucky to have you in their lives. Do you play Pokémon with them?
Landon covered his face with his hand, but he seemed to be acting out embarrassment more tha
n feeling it. He looked up between his fingers. I do. I actually played it until I was like, fifteen or something. Now the kids have all of my cards. Did he look wistful?
Dustin could envision Landon as an awkward, gangly high school geek. He must have been adorable. He wondered if he still felt that way under that sexy, mature exterior.
For the first time Dustin felt like maybe this could work. Landon was more human and touchable now. Dustin wasn’t sure whether it was easier to talk about Pokémon because he’d already given his cards away, because they’d already paved the way with comic books, or because he liked his sister’s kids, but he was glad Landon was opening up.
Landon luxuriously stretched and Dustin couldn’t keep himself from staring. God, he had that casual sensuality down to a T, his body language enticing and unquestionably erotic.
Alright. The first two times had been sexy, but the third one was a bit of not-so-subtle hint. Landon wanted him to get started, but Dustin still had no idea what he wanted or how to get there.
He kept wondering if Landon had any friends when he was younger. Growing up Deaf or gay wasn’t usually easy, depending on where you lived. While Landon certainly seemed to have a lot of friends now, it didn’t sound like he was close to anyone except his sister.
He cast around the room, trying to prolong their conversation for a few more minutes. He was about to ask about the potted plants when Landon captured his attention.
Ready for your lesson? He made it look so dirty, the way that he moved his body and tilted his head when he signed “lesson.” But of course, it was dirty. And it was kind of hot to think of it that way.
Dustin was a little sad, though, that he wouldn’t get to talk to Landon a bit more. He was intrigued by all of his contradictions and wanted to get to know him better.
And, if he was being honest, he was still terrified about what would happen next.
He knew that Landon was a switch, which made it even worse. What if Landon was even better at this than he was? Would he be getting advice from Landon as another Dom or a sub?
He was starting to regret his decision to come over at all. But since he was here, his best option was honesty. I’m not sure what I’m supposed to do.
That’s alright. We’re not going to do anything that we don’t talk about first. Something seemed to occur to Landon, and he strutted across the room. Picking up his phone, he settled back onto the couch, but much closer to Dustin’s chair.
Dustin could see him slipping into “teacher” mode as he launched into a lecture. In a strange way, he looked much more comfortable like this than when he’d been posing on the couch.
The first rule about any encounter is that, as the Dom, it’s your responsibility to choose activities that the sub is interested in or willing to try. It’s true that the sub is really the one in control, because the Dom can only take the control that the sub is willing to give him. Do you know about hard and soft limits?
Dustin nodded. Now that he could see Landon’s passion for teaching, it made the practiced seduction feel a little more fake. They were clearly both sides of Landon’s personality, but teaching seemed more real.
Great. I’m sending you my list. Some things we wouldn’t do without a third person to be a mentor while you’re learning, but there are still a lot of things that you can just try with me. Landon fiddled with his phone for a moment and then Dustin heard a chime from his pocket.
Dustin pulled up the text, not having any idea what to expect. There were two typed pages of categorized entries and most of them had a hand-drawn star beside them.
Dustin’s mind was reeling. Not just from the exhaustive list of kinky possibilities, which went far beyond anything Dustin had imagined for the day, but also that Landon used this list so often that he had it ready on his phone.
So the stars are the ones you’re interested in? he confirmed.
Yeah.
Are some of them soft limits? Or are those blank?
Landon thought for a moment. I guess I don’t really distinguish between soft and hard limits. I think I’d need to have a lot of trust in someone to push my soft limits and I never really get there.
With every word, Dustin was starting to get a fuller picture of Landon. He was outgoing and popular, but he didn’t have close friends. He sent out his kink list from his phone, but he’d never been with someone for long enough to think about soft limits, let alone test them. He was fascinating and complex, but he seemed closed off to anything more than one-night stands.
Dustin’s protective instincts were firing hard, and he tried to turn them down. Right now, he wanted to wrap Landon up and take care of his every need. He wanted to crack him open and put him back together again.
But Landon hadn’t said he wanted that. And all of Dustin’s exes had told him he was suffocating when he acted like this. He didn’t always realize he was doing it, though. He’d just wanted to make their lives easier and show them that he cared. Even Zhong had mentioned that he could be a bit overbearing.
This was his signal to get out now, before he started to get in over his head. Not to mention that he still didn’t know if he could even spank Landon correctly, or whatever he was supposed to do.
He just needed to remember that this was a one-night stand. A lesson.
What’s your safeword? he finally thought to ask.
I use the traffic light system. It’s easier for people to remember. He said it with a smile on his face, like he didn’t even realize that his safewords might be worth remembering. Do you understand how that works?
I’ve read about red to stop, yellow to slow down, and green to go. But you’ll need to sign your safewords, explained Dustin quickly. He tried to push memories of Alan out of his mind. He’d been too foolish to tell Alan the same thing and he wouldn’t make that mistake again. I can technically hear you, but what you’re saying might not make sense to me. Especially if I’m having strong emotions myself.
Landon nodded. I’ve only been with one other Deaf Dom, but I think I can remember. He winked.
Dustin sure as hell hoped he meant it. Is there anything else you want to tell me? Or anything specific that you’d like to do together? He needed some sort of guidance here.
Landon shrugged. The heavier stuff, like whips or breath play, that you’d need to train for first, so those are off the list. Otherwise, if it’s on the list, we can talk about what you’re interested in.
Yeah. I wasn’t even thinking of anything like that while I figured things out. Like, I didn’t even realize that I might be a Dom until my ex told me when he was breaking up with me.
Landon almost kept a straight face, but Dustin didn’t take the small quirk of his lips personally. It was fucking awkward that someone else needed to point this out to him. But Landon recovered quickly. We’ll keep it simple. There are a lot of things you can do with just your hands. Or, we can go to my bedroom and check out my toy chest.
How could Landon just be so casual about all of this? In a way, he kind of wished that Landon were just as nervous as he was, so that they could start small and explore together. He was feeling completely out of his depth.
Is there anything that you’d particularly like to do tonight? he repeated.
Landon leaned forward, that seductive grin on his face. What do you want to do?
That wasn’t helpful at all. But he also didn’t want to embarrass himself by asking again. Alright, um… I don’t know if I want to do anything yet. I think I just want to see how it feels to be a Dom. Maybe just, um, do something that I’ve already done but in a more Dom-y way. Does that make any sense?
That make sense. What were you thinking of?
The only thing that he could think of was Landon on his knees. Maybe, could you give me a blow job? But where I control things a bit more? Like pull your hair? I wouldn’t choke you or anything, he quickly added.
A bit of gagging is OK with me, actually. Just not breath play without someone else to mentor you. Let’s talk about what it m
eans for you to control things.
Yeah, this was super awkward. Not at all like a sexy date. Nothing too intense or anything. I just… he wasn’t sure how to articulate it. I want to feel like you’re giving me control and that I can… control what we do. It felt really stupid saying it that way.
But apparently Landon didn’t think there was anything too weird about it, because he just outlined the scene and gave a few pointers. They went over safe words and things that Landon felt comfortable with. It felt a little clinical and removed, but he was grateful for the primer and glad to know exactly what Landon felt comfortable with.
Hopefully that awkwardness would melt away when they got started. How do we start the scene? he finally asked.
Without another word, Landon sank to his knees.
The move was graceful and practiced. He made it look easy, when Dustin would guess that it actually wasn’t. How many times had Landon done that before?
And now he was kneeling in the middle of the living room, hands clasped behind his back and knees spread. He’d inclined his head slightly, eyes unfocused, and his hair fell around his face.
Dustin felt his pulse quicken, and his cock, which had been half-hard the whole time, pressed against his jeans. Fuck, he was gorgeous. His slim muscles and tantalizing skin were all on display. His tiny briefs did nothing to hide his arousal, and that turned Dustin on even more.
But mostly it was his submission that was making his heart race. In that simple act, Landon was turning over control.
Somehow, like this, he looked real again. As he breathed, his shoulders loosened. He was watching Dustin, but not with practiced flirtation or as a trainer. He was just waiting, and Dustin could see the stress drain out of him.
It was beautiful. Landon was trusting Dustin with that perfect body. He was putting his happiness and his pain and his needs in Dustin’s control, and any doubt that Dustin had about what he wanted in a partner was irrevocably washed away.
Love Lessons (Love Language Book 2) Page 7
