The Marquess Who Kissed Me: (The Valiant Love Regency Romance) (A Historical Romance Book)

by Deborah Wilson

  He nodded and let her enter without stopping her.

  * * *

  He turned to her that night after everyone was asleep and the fire low enough that his movements would not be detected. As the day carried on, he thought about everything he wanted to say to Belle and considered how she’d react if he told her other truths. He’d decided he’d reveal another fact about himself, but his mind went blank when he saw her.

  She was lying down. His shirt was her night rail once more. The material hid her curves from his sight, but her calves and feet were exposed. The expanse of skin had his heart racing. She had one foot in her hand and was massaging it with some force. Her hair hid her face, but when she looked at him, he saw the pain.

  He knelt on the pallets next to her. “You’re hurting.”

  “I’ll be all right. I’m just not used to so many hills.”

  He took the foot from her hand and pressed his thumb into the center of her sole.

  She laughed and tried to kick him away.

  “Stay still,” he said.

  She breathed heavily and strained to keep her voice low. “You’re tickling me.”

  He smiled. “I don’t mean to. Hold still.” He continued to press into her foot, and she covered her face and blocked her mouth from releasing giggles.

  He laughed. He’d done this to her before. He stroked up. She dropped her hands and glared at him with outrage. He laughed again and began to knead the ball of her foot.

  She giggled again and then sighed. She calmed down and only jumped when he moved to another sensitive place. She was so sensitive. He tried to keep his mind on tending to her feet, but it was hard not to think of all the other places he wanted to touch her.

  As she wiggled, his shirt rose higher. Her knees were now visible. If he tilted his head, he could see the back of her thigh. She was so tiny. So perfect.

  He lifted her foot and kissed the sole. Her breath caught.

  His eyes lowered. Her thighs were exposed.

  His breathing slowed as he considered parting them and placing his mouth in other places. A glance at her face showed her own desire. Would she stop him if he stripped her right now?

  It was so quiet. The lamp burned just bright enough to add an intimate glow to the space. Her skin was a lovely contrast to the dark pallet underneath her legs.

  He lowered her foot and shifted his hand up to her ankle. He kneaded there and when she moaned, he continued up. He dug his fingers in her calves.

  She shook and closed her eyes.

  His heart raced at the display of pleasure. She shifted closer and grabbed his shirt. He didn’t fight her, and she pulled him down on top of her.

  His mind abandoned him to sensation as her mouth opened under his. He continued to stroke her soft skin. The sound of her gasps and moans was like a beautiful symphony. Coaxing the notes from her lips made him ache.

  She opened her legs, and he fell between them.

  Only thin layers separated them now. The heat from her womanhood engulfed him.

  His mind screamed at him to take her, shouting that he was incomplete without her. She was his but wouldn’t know for certain until he’d planted himself deep within her. His own growing madness wouldn’t quiet until he made her scream and weep and beg for him to never let her go.

  Belle pulled away and met his eyes. A touch of fear entered her eyes. “What are you thinking right now?”

  It was the same thing he thought every time he touched her. “If I do this, it will be done.” And then there would be no turning back. He would never let her go.

  And why should he? He had a contract with her name on it, didn’t he? He could turn two years into forever. He could have her affection and devotion forever.

  And in exchange, what would he give her? The answer hovered at the far corners of his mind: Darkness. That

  was all he’d ever had to offer anyone. Belle had so much light in her. He didn’t want to snuff it out.

  She caressed his face. “Do you believe it would be wrong for us to be together?”

  “Yes,” he said without hesitation. “I don’t want to trap you.”

  She smiled. “I don’t feel trapped.”

  “That’s because I’ve blinded you with soft touches and a sense of complete protection. It’s like a pillow. It can hold your head up. It can also suffocate you.”

  She locked her fingers on his jaw. “You could never suffocate me. I like being with you. I like that I have the choice. You gave me that, you know? I didn’t have this before you. I wasn’t free to feel what I feel for anyone.” Her hold gentled. “I wasn’t free to love who I wanted. Now I am.”

  Her chest ached as he stared in her eyes. Her smile was gentle, and Oliver took a moment to capture it in his mind. He wanted to die with that look at the forefront of his mind.

  Pure happiness.

  “I’m free to love you,” she whispered. “And I do. I love you, Oliver, and no matter what happens now, I will always be thankful that I had the opportunity.”

  She loved him. She’d said it. He’d won.

  But he’d won it falsely, and he could not allow her to think otherwise any longer.

  ∫ ∫ ∫

  5 2

  * * *

  Belle held still and waited for Oliver to react to her confession. She couldn’t hold it in any longer. It was destroying her. She’d waited too long to say it and refused to wait another second.

  And just as she’d promised, if he left her right now and walked out of the cave, she wouldn’t regret loving him. There would never be anyone she loved more. How could she give her heart to another after everything Oliver had sacrificed for her?

  He pulled out of her hold, and Belle felt her body cool without him. Oliver helped her to sit up and then grabbed her hands. The tightness in her heart eased. They were still connected. Still touching.

  “There’s something I must tell you,” he said.

  The unease showed itself again. “What is it?”

  “The men in the Scottish mountains that Gregory sent me to kill… I didn’t kill them. They’re not dead.”

  She frowned but said nothing.

  Oliver looked down at their hands. “They’re alive, Belle. In fact, most of the people he sent me to kill are alive.”

  “How?”

  “I hid them from Gregory. You’re right. I did teach others how to survive in harsh conditions. The boys were not the first.”

  She tried to wrap her mind around what Oliver was saying but found it hard to do. “I don’t understand. Did you kill anyone for Gregory?”

  “Very few.” He couldn’t meet her eyes. “Gregory gave me a list of the sins of the men before I went to kill. It was part of our agreement. However, what Gregory didn’t know was if I deemed their sin forgivable, I left them alive under the condition that they hide for a time until after Gregory’s death. I’ve been helping people hide for years.”

  “Hide where?” Gregory’s reach was far.

  “The mountains, but more recently here.”

  Here?

  He looked at the wall behind her.

  Belle looked behind her. She’d noticed that the wall was different than the others. “You’re hiding people in the cave?”

  “Yes.”

  She thought about all the people she remembered Gregory didn’t like. She recalled newspaper reports of their disappearances. Oliver had always been gone around the same time, and she’d been sure he was the cause.

  He’d killed dozens. Innocent people. Anyone who irritated Gregory would suffer. Many times, she’d believed death better than her own circumstances. At least they didn’t have to look at Gregory anymore.

  They no longer had a reason to fear. But that wasn’t true. They were alive.

  Belle said some names and Oliver confirmed they were alive. “And Mark?” she asked finally. He’d disappeared before she and Oliver met, so she knew the chances of him being there were near impossible.

  Oliver surprised her. “He lives.
He’s here. He’d taken your warning years ago. Gregory asked me to find him and I did, but Gregory never found out. ”

  The relief she felt was great. But then another sickening feeling filled her stomach. Her friends were alive and Oliver had never told her. He’d allowed her to think them dead for years. Her stomach turned with great pain as she looked at him.

  “Why?” she asked. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

  “I couldn’t risk exposing them,” Oliver said. “You have to understand that. You were close to Gregory…”

  She moved back and then stood. “I was never close to Gregory. Physically, yes, but I never confided in him.” Her mouth felt dry, and her heart continued to pound with relentless pain. She’d cried over the dead for years.

  And yet… “I don’t understand.”

  “I didn’t trust you,” he said. “But I trust you now.”

  “You trust me now that the world is about to know they’re not dead. That does me no good, Oliver.” She’d suspected Oliver hated her, but now she knew it was true. She turned to the back wall. So many innocent people were on the other side and he’d kept that from her. She’d possibly been sleeping right next to them and she hadn’t even known it.

  She touched the wall and then clung to it in order to keep standing.

  Oliver cupped her shoulders. “Belle, I’m sorry.”

  She couldn’t look at him. She’d allowed him to cause her pain over and over again. This was the last time. She swore it. “You need to go.”

  “I trust you now, Belle.”

  She spun around. “You trust me when it no longer matters.”

  He glared down at her. “Actually, it still matters. I’m not sure if I’ll be letting them out this year after all.”

  “What do you mean? Gregory is dead.”

  “There’s something going on, Belle. I can’t explain it to you, but it has to do with the boys.”

  “You mean Ward?”

  His eyes widened. “Clive told you?”

  She shook her head. “They’re boys, Oliver. You can’t keep these people in here as though they are prisoners.”

  “That’s not the point. The point is I trust you to keep this quiet.”

  Her lips curved up in spite of her deep sadness. Tears fell from her eyes. “I tell you I love you and you tell me this. You knew how I’d react. You knew you were hurting me. You chose the best time to do it. Now I know how you feel, Oliver. You’ve made sure of that.”

  They would never be together because he would never let them be together.

  Because he couldn’t.

  “Leave,” she told him.

  He reached for her face, and she turned away.

  “Leave.” She turned away. She listened as she left the cave and closed her eyes.

  Once she was certain he was some distance away, she looked around the room for anything she could use as a tool. She was going to the other side. She would free the people inside.

  She knew it was breaking Oliver’s trust to do it, but she didn’t care. There was no real trust between them anyhow.

  There was a shovel in the corner, but it was built for a larger man and far too heavy for her. Just touching it reminded her of the strength in Oliver’s hands.

  She turned her mind away from that and focused on what needed to be done.

  She had Johnathan’s rucksack. It held supplies for the camp, so it wasn’t truly wrong to open it. She found a small shovel that was perfect and started to dig against the wall. It came loose rather easily, to her surprise. Rocks tumbled to the ground around her.

  At the first hole, she felt a cool wind touch her and she shivered. The cave was cold. How could Oliver think to keep people in there? She imagined some of them sick and frozen to death.

  Belle began to dig faster. When she finally made a hole big enough for her to fit inside, she grabbed her lantern and tentatively stepped in. Darkness greeted her along with squeaking. Another chill went through her when she realized what was making that sound. Bats.

  She hadn’t feared the dark in years, but this was different. It was consuming and chilling. But there was no turning back. She would go and find the people and take them to freedom.

  She’d faced worse things than this. She’d lived through Gregory. This would be nothing in comparison. She looked around for a bag so she could take the dried meat, flint, and other things that would be necessary. Johnathan had another sack inside his bag. It was empty so she took it and filled it up.

  There was a coat in the chest and though Belle didn’t want the scent of Oliver clinging to her during her journey, she knew she had no choice. The moment she put it on, her body all but rejoiced. The comfort the material gave her went beyond the heavy material. Oliver’s scent was like an added layer of protection.

  Checking the oil in the lantern, she set out.

  ∫ ∫ ∫

  5 3

  * * *

  Belle kept the lantern close to the ground so she could see her steps. The walking path was wide but then began to narrow until she was on a cliff. At her side was a drop that seemed endless. She slowed her steps to make sure the ground was steady before she moved.

  Moisture filled the air and other noises accompanied the shrilling of the bats. Wing flutters made her heart race, and she feared them attacking her.

  The darkness seemed to go on forever.

  Then the path opened again, and she breathed easier. When she heard water, she stopped to look around. She held out her lamp and saw a waterfall.

  Her skirts felt wet, and she realized she was standing in water. She looked around and couldn’t see a way back to dry land besides going back in the direction she’d come from.

  And that wasn’t an option.

  As her stockings and boots began to soak, she made up her mind. She would simply have to walk through the water. She took a step and then screamed when a hand grabbed her and yanked her back.

  She dropped the lamp, but Oliver caught that as well.

  “Tell me you’re not this stupid,” he hissed in her ear. He had a strong arm around her waist now. “Tell me I’m mistaken. Tell me you did not venture into a cave and have no idea what you’re doing.”

  She feared moving. He sounded very angry. “How did you…?”

  He tightened his arm around her. “You think I couldn’t hear you chipping away at the wall? I knew your plan.” His voice was heavy with disappointment. “I woke Noel to watch the boys so I could follow you.” He turned her around roughly. “What was your plan? To set them free, little Moses?”

  She saw his anger and matched him with her own. “You think I betrayed you by coming here, but you betrayed me first. You kept this from me!”

  He lowered his face to hers. “Actually, you betrayed me first. Five years ago.”

  “Oh, let it go! You didn’t even kill anyone you didn’t want dead.”

  “That’s not the point.”

  She shoved him. “Go away. I don’t need you.”

  “You almost stepped to your death. The water is deep over there. In your skirts and with this coat on, you’d have drowned.” He cupped her cheek then and his words softened. “And I’d have lost you forever.” He placed his other hand on her cheek, trapping her. Then his voice grew hard. “You think I went through all this, bore this shame and guilt, sacrificed myself, looked death in the face over and over again, just to have you drown?”

  “I…” She didn’t know what to say. She was confused by the emotion in his eyes.

  His gaze narrowed. “I won’t allow it. Do you hear me?”

  She nodded, hoping he would stop touching her if she agreed to everything he said.

  But he didn’t. His tone softened. His fingers began to caress. His eyes bore into hers and there was visible shine to them. “I almost lost you.”

  She covered his mouth with one of her hands just before his lips could touch hers.

  They stood there in silence. His shock turned to confusion.

  “You don’t get to
do that,” Belle whispered. “Not anymore.”

  The confusion in his brows deepened, and Belle could only attribute that look to the fact that she usually always gave in to their emotions and heightened feelings.

  But the crash back to reality had taken its toll. She loved him, but she couldn’t love enough for both of them. “I know what is wrong now.” She realized as she said the words aloud. She removed her hand and settled it on his shoulder. “I’m sorry.”

  “Why are you sorry?” His expression became guarded. “And why does it sound more like pity?”

  “Perhaps I do pity you. I say I love you and you don’t even understand it.” She knew there had been no women before her. His grandmother was a recent addition to his life, having come only a few years before Belle herself and his mother who’d always been there never stood up for him. Perhaps, she’d said she loved him, but then she’d left him to be devoured by his wolfish father.

  He could not blame Oliver’s mother for her choices. Perhaps she feared acting would only make her husband worse, but Belle’s love was different. It was more than just words. It led her to act on the behalf of those around her.

  “You never had a chance to learn it.”

  He stiffened. “And I suppose you intend to teach me this love?” He was crowding her again. He took the lantern from her hands and placed it somewhere above them. A hook. Then his hands settled on her hips.

  Belle gasped. Just because she wasn’t kissing him didn’t mean she didn’t want to. Their desire for one another burned like a wildfire and frequently got out of control.

  He bent his head to her cheek. “I asked you a question,” he whispered at her ear.

  She stroked his hair. “I will try to show you... with a few new rules.”

  He pulled back and glared. “You think you control me?”

  She was about to say no when suddenly her feet were off the ground and he pinned her against the wall. His eyes were hard. “Or perhaps, you already know you do.”

  Belle stared at him. Her feet were soaked. The cold had been starting to get to her, yet when Oliver backed her into the wall, she knew there was nowhere else she’d rather be.