It's Not Your Money

by Tosha Silver

  In fact, the more you offer, the more you start to trust . . . you. I’ll give you guidelines, but your own authority led by the inner Divine will blossom. By the end of this process, that quiet Knowing will hopefully be stronger than ever.

  ENDING THE INNER WAR

  My friend Carlotta is so nervous about everything she eats, she trots through the health food store with her wooden pendulum, testing each cauliflower head or carob bar with a vengeance. As someone with a sensitive body, I understand that. On the other hand, Carlotta constantly tells herself the most tragic and belittling things, beating herself with a mental bat from morning to night.

  To me, the terrible things we tell ourselves can have a toxicity far beyond what we consume. Over time, through offering and clearing, the war inside can cease.

  This is a regime change that can only happen from within. The inner despot of harshness and self-blame is slowly deposed, forever freeing you from its reign of terror. A softer, more forgiving way is en route.

  CORDS AND CHAKRAS

  Ironically, many of the financial beliefs that tyrannize us are not even our own. For example, we might hold some that our mom felt while we were in utero. We absorb these through a kind of osmosis, and they form psychic cords that hold us captive. These “ties that bind” can leave us feeling entangled and powerless.

  These truly can feel like psychic lassos. Certain attitudes about money, such as I’ll never have enough, may simply be cords to a spouse or parent. For example, if your father had one financial crisis after another, you might expect your own pattern will be the same. But taking off his cord might restore you to sanity, or at least to your own destiny, so you don’t feel you must relive his.

  Usually cords have not been attached with diabolical intentions, though, of course, occasionally they have. Often it was just the other person’s limiting belief or wound that got stored within you like a parasite.

  The great news is that these sticky ropes can be removed! We’ll be clearing them in the same way you would a messy room, and then we’ll ground you back in the present, in your own sacred relationship to Divine Source.

  But first we need to talk about chakras, the energy centers located along the spine, since that’s where the cords attach. We have (at least) seven of them, with the first at the base of the spine and the last at the crown. For the purposes of our process, we’ll focus mostly on the lower three centers, all of which relate to security. In general, I’ve found that’s where the most virulent cords fasten.

  You might have someone hooked into the grounding chakra at the base of the spine, or the second chakra, the survival and creativity center right below your navel. Or attached to the power chakra at your solar plexus. Or perhaps to all three. With a little practice, you’ll be able to sense which chakras are hooked to someone else’s wounds and fears, or even to a past life.

  Alix was corded to the horrible trauma of her father’s suicide, which happened when she was 10. Although she’d had years of therapy, she still often felt as if she were frozen in that event. After a few repetitions of the meditation we’re about to do, she was able to cut the cord to her father at her second chakra and finally stand on her own feet. The release freed her to fully be in the present.

  Now, you needn’t be paranoid about cords, because once you’re aware of them, they’re actually not hard to remove. Though clearing can be done around any type of issue, we’ll focus here specifically on finances. This meditation will guide you.

  Cord Meditation

  I hope you’ll do this a number of times during the remaining weeks. You’ll probably have more than one person or event come up, but notice what central one presents itself first:

  Focus on your breath and allow your energy to drop inside. Feel as if the earth is supporting you and your mind quieting.

  Allow yourself to sense, bubbling up into your being, somebody that you’re corded to about money. It could be a partner, or a parent; it could be someone from your past—anyone whose views about money you’ve been storing in your body.

  You may even notice where you’ve been storing this. You may see the rope attaching below your belly button or to the base of your spine. You may see it attaching to your power center, in your solar plexus. Trust what you’re getting. Just take the first person that comes.

  Then say to them, “We’re complete now. I’m reowning my connection to God’s money. I have my own holy connection to it, and I reown this fully, because I deserve to live from a state of abundance. I deserve to trust that I will have enough. I deserve the good. I deserve to be a vehicle for abundance.

  “I’m now removing this cord. I’m removing this rope to you from my own body.”

  Take it off in a way that’s easiest for you. You might pull, burn, or cut it off.

  You can thank that person; you can even wish them all the highest blessings. You can say, “We are complete. This cord is no longer running my system. I will now have my own relationship to God’s largesse. I am free to be a vehicle for God’s good.”

  Whoever you found on this first round is central. That’s why they came up. Just taking off that one attachment may make you feel more present in your own body. You’ll be starting your own relationship to the Divine’s money rather than living theirs.

  Now, let yourself drop in again. You’re just going to see one image. It could be an event from this lifetime, or it could be from a past life. Your psyche will show you one event from the past that you’re corded to—one that’s keeping you in a place of fear or scarcity. If you’re getting many pictures, that’s fine; just take the first one that comes and then return to the others later, using this same technique.

  This primary image could be something that happened, or something you’re scared of, or even a memory. Let it come up and play out, whatever it is. Once again, just feel the rope of energy that attaches you to that image. It will dissolve when you finally cut that cord or burn it away and say, “This memory is no longer my reality. The power of God is stronger than this dream.” Just feel yourself releasing it, as if you’re watching a balloon fly away in the sky. See it leave. It no longer determines what’s possible. It’s no longer your story. You’ve cut the cord and made space for Love to bring what’s needed.

  Feel the release of the cord to that central person and image. If they ever try to reattach, you can swat them away. You’re no longer available.

  And then, take a final moment back in your own body to say, “It’s easy for me to receive. It’s easy to receive the highest Divine plan and become a vehicle for the good.”

  Then, when you’re ready, slowly come back out, remembering all that occurred.

  RECLAIMING THE POWER

  For some of you, one cord meditation might be enough to clear the dominant person blocking the way. But others may find a veritable crowd in the lower three chakras—several people whose beliefs about money still trap you. It doesn’t matter. Just go back each day and continue to clear for as long as you need. After you do this, it can help to drink plentiful water and rest, if needed.

  Keep in mind that no cord can stay attached without your permission. The first step is simply to become aware. Once you get in the practice of detecting them, they become much more obvious. You won’t even necessarily have to be in meditation.

  For example, on a hard day, you might be walking around thinking—yet again—that you’ll never, ever have enough. Then suddenly you sense a tugging at your second chakra. Maybe you even see a fleeting image of your sister. Out of the blue, you have the awareness: Wow, I’ve always been carrying her fear here. We were so close I picked it all up!

  And you pluck it off.

  Please be gentle as you remove these, especially in the beginning. While it’s a straightforward process, you may feel a little tired or spaced out at first. After all, someone’s psychic energy may have hooked you forever, and now you’re saying, “No more! Party over!” But don’t forget, cords are a natural phenomenon, and you’re simply reclaiming yo
ur own energy. You can even send the other people love, blessings, or appreciation while you make the separation.

  As you become increasingly aware and present, you address each cord with patience and love. You pluck them off as you find them. With a little practice, it just becomes second nature. No big deal. They may occasionally return, but don’t fret. For example, one day, you might find yourself in a wave of financial fear, but then quickly realize, Wow, I’m hooked again. I retapped my family’s terror, but since it’s not mine, I gratefully release it.

  With these tools, you’re no longer at the mercy of scarcity thoughts. Over time, you’ll make the decision to align with truth instead of falsehoods. Lies like “I’ll never get what I need. I can never receive. I’ll always be envious” will lose their power. You’ll simply notice when you slip into old patterns, and you’ll gratefully return to the truth.

  The Full Abundance Change Me Prayer says it all.

  Change me into one who can fully love, forgive, and accept myself so I may carry Your Light without restriction. Let everything that needs to go, go. Let everything that needs to come, come.

  I am utterly Your own.

  Some Examples

  Cords may affect you physically in surprising ways you never could have imagined. Cutting them can sometimes bring intense relief.

  This is so powerful! I’ve cut cords many times before, but never like this.

  My uncle came to live with us when I was about nine, and soon after I began to have terrible lower-back pain. No medical test could explain why. So today, when I saw who was corded to me, of course it was my uncle. The rope ran from the front of my pelvis, through my perineum, and onto my lower back. The pain was fiery hot.

  I cut it, releasing my uncle’s deep sense of scarcity, and lo and behold, away went my pain! I never would’ve put the two together if I hadn’t experienced this firsthand.

  De-cording can also help release fear coming through generations of suffering. It’s common to hold someone from your childhood in one of the lower three centers and then re-create their anxieties in your own life.

  My Chinese mother grew up the youngest of eight, with four kids in one bed and another four scattered throughout the apartment. Her father died when she was little, and my grandmother, who spoke no English, was left to care for them all. They all grew up hungry and scared. Yet I’m finding as I release these cords to both my mother and grandmother, I’m regaining my own sense of power in all areas, including money. I feel enormous compassion for what they experienced, but know I’m learning a different way to be that grows stronger each day.

  Some of this cord removal is just downright funny. This makes me laugh.

  I just did the cord-cutting meditation for the first time. The person I released was my ex-husband, who’s actually still a good friend. I had a long-standing debt to him that I’d been paying back since our divorce four years ago, but your course convinced me to clean up the rest. So it seemed fitting to cut the cord.

  But check this out. Right after I finished, I opened Facebook to see that he had changed his cover photo. There had been a picture of the two of us, but now he’d cropped me out! At first I was insulted, until I saw he’d done it precisely during the meditation. Whoa!

  Yes indeed, someone intuitive may sense you’ve uncorded them. You may still adore them and be close, but you won’t be tied in a way that limits your freedom and clarity.

  Knowing how to remove cords is like possessing a sacred sword in your bag of tricks. Even so, you may occasionally find you need help getting the “stickiest” ones to stay off. When that happens, you can always call in a form like Archangel Michael with his saber of light to do the dirty work. Lord Ganesh, the remover of obstacles, or Kali, the Goddess of Death and Rebirth, can equally pulverize these ropes. If you need the help, feel free to invite it.

  PAST LIVES

  Maybe you grew up in a family where there was enough, yet you still freak out often about money. I was puzzled by this myself until I began to ponder past lives. When you extend the range of influence beyond the current incarnation, many things make sense, including questions like, “How could Mozart have composed a complete piano concerto at age five?” or “How could Joan of Arc have led that army as a mere teenager?”

  So, it’s not only talent and abilities that get carried over; many fears and phobias, including those about money, can emanate from the memories and impressions of these past lifetimes. Perhaps in another era you died in the bubonic plague in Europe or lost everything in an earthquake in Tibet. You never know.

  Or maybe you do.

  Someone once led me on a past-life regression where I saw with crystalline clarity a lifetime during the Edo period in Kyoto, Japan, where I’d been a struggling geisha. The vision was so vivid, I felt the fear as if it were yesterday. While some Westerners might imagine a rarified life of exquisite food and kimonos, I felt constant financial desperation amidst the beauty. To survive, I was totally at the mercy of finding a generous danna, or patron, who would subsidize my food and clothing.

  I realized that the financial worries that had dogged me the first half of this life came in part from those Edo days. It also explained why I’d always felt profoundly at home around Japanese aesthetics and culture.

  ABOUT SACRIFICE AND LOSS

  In a sense, you could say you learn how to offer through disappointment and loss. True offering is a passionate and direct invitation for Love to take over and bring Her own plan instead of the ego’s.

  And sometimes, here’s the truth, it’s just unbearably painful. You feel as if She’s cutting away all that needs to go: illusions, obsessions, addictions . . . often without an anesthetic.

  This is why I adore viewing everything as a sacrifice to Love.

  In India, Vedic priests do gorgeous yagnas, or holy fire ceremonies, where they make prayers to the presiding deities, such as Lakshmi, Kali, and Ganesh. At different junctures, ghee, milk, rice, turmeric, and colorful flowers are fed to the fire. Rather than only casting your problem to the Divine, you’re giving something back as well.

  Life can be seen the same way.

  My good friend Chris Northrup was in Argentina a few years ago when someone walked up and yanked a cherished diamond necklace off her neck. Understandably she was badly shaken. But when she told me, I couldn’t help saying, “Chris, you’re at such a massive turning point. You know you’re leaving behind so much that you no longer need. Maybe Kali just took a sacrifice for the new time and it’s all one crazy blessing. Who knows what She may bring instead?”

  I didn’t know how Chris might answer. But she shuddered in recognition and became immediately relieved about the “loss.”

  Even in the greatest catastrophes, these ideas of offering and sacrifice can bring enormous consolation and help.

  I’m one of the many who lost a home in the Northern California fires. I’m also one of the businesspeople here who lost most of our income because our clients were affected as well. Yet somehow, I’ve been financially carried. It was a miracle we got FEMA and a couple of grants. Then our friends started a benefit page and we got a low-interest business loan to help us rebuild.

  But even with all these gifts, I’ve felt terrified and bewildered. Now I realize it’s more about losing an ego construct . . . who I thought I was.

  So I thank you for the concept of sacrifice. If I can view the devastation as that and bless it, I feel full instead of empty. If the catastrophe can be a sacrifice, then I know I’m part of Something Bigger. Having gone through all of this, I love the reminder to let Divine abundance to come through me as opposed to thinking everything is mine.

  RELEASING MONEY FEARS

  For this last section on releasing money fears, let me share a few letters from people going through this particular week of the process. You may find comparable issues happening for you.

  THE COMPUTER DEBACLE

  My son spilled water on my brand-new MacBook, and the next morning, when I turned it on, it w
ouldn’t turn off. Total panic.

  When I took it to Apple, they said it was probably the motherboard and they’d let me know. It could cost nothing . . . or $800.

  For the first time in my life, I decided to totally offer it to God, and whatever the outcome, I’d be fine. Every time worry arrived, I reminded myself that it was God’s. Imagine my excitement when four days later they said it would cost nothing. Thank you so much for helping us think this way!

  This next one is about offering even while you’re waiting for things to line up.

  RESTING IN THE MIDDLE

  Here’s what’s nuts. I’ve done all the steps every day, and though I keep running out of money, new opportunities keep appearing! I feel more peaceful than I have in years.

  I’ve never in my life experienced ease with money. For me to currently have little and yet still feel relaxed is unbelievable. I’m learning how to just be “in the middle,” when the shift is occurring, but I’m not yet on the other side.

  You may be experiencing something similar. You may get tested at times, when money has to keep flowing out no matter what you do. It may come in and go straight back out. Don’t panic. The Universe could simply be getting you comfortable with being a conduit. Later, the money can accumulate.

  Okay, one more about financial fears.

  MISTAKES WERE MADE

  Recently, the accounting for my home business got screwed up, and I prayed for help, knowing this could finally heal my money anxieties. I found myself asking for protection so this wouldn’t be discovered.

  But I love your approach where we don’t regard money as our own. If the money isn’t mine, why would I need to pray for protection? Is it only important to forgive myself for the mistake?