Love, All (Camp Firefly Falls Book 19)

by Tamsen Parker

  “Hey, I can wait with the Chlo-ster while you run the check in. No need to wake her up.”

  Nate was looking at her, handsome face a bit drawn because he could probably tell she wasn’t okay but didn’t understand why. And therein lay the problem.

  “Cool, thanks.”

  She let herself out and closed the door quietly so as to not wake Chloe. The main office was closed and locked, which made sense for a Sunday evening, but there was a mail slot with a basket on the inside. So even though her stomach dropped at not putting so much sweat and scrimping and sleepless nights and sacrifice into another human’s hands, Ruby forced herself to drop the carefully made-out envelope through the slot and satisfied herself by checking the basket from a window. Yep, it was in there, hadn’t by some mystery of physics flown out and into a trash can or under a bookshelf. That would just have to be good enough.

  A few deep breaths, and repeating in her head that all of this was okay, she made her way back to the car and climbed in as quietly as she’d climbed out. After she buckled herself in, she sat facing forward and waited for Nate to back out of the space he’d parked in so they could get on their merry way.

  But instead of the familiar whirring of a car going in reverse, she was met with Nate’s hand on her thigh again. She took a long blink, but eventually turned to face Nate, whose face was crumpled like a confused puppy’s.

  “I…I know I said something that upset you. And I’m sorry. I wasn’t trying to be an ass, I was just thinking of Chloe, and wow does that kid love riding. Like a lot. And watching her this morning when we went over to the Kendalls’… She’s awesome. And I know you know that better than I do and you know how important this is to her, so I’m guessing you didn’t send in the final payment before now because you didn’t have it. I didn’t mean to make you feel like I was calling you irresponsible. You’re anything but, and I know you’re doing everything in your power to get that kid to horse camp.”

  If he’d said she should’ve asked him for the money or asked to borrow it from him, she would’ve punched him as hard as she could. She’d even curled her fingers into her palm, thumb tucked on the outside because the last thing she needed were ER bills from breaking her hand on his annoyingly shapely biceps.

  Thankfully, he didn’t. He reached for her hand and laid his over it. Squeezed again and looked her in the eyes, sincerity practically oozing from his pores.

  “I’m sorry. I hope you can forgive me for being a thoughtless asshat. I’ll try to keep my stupid mouth shut in the future.”

  His face. His ridiculously handsome and earnest face. She was still kind of mad at him and that would take a while to wear off, but in the meantime, he’d apologized, for real, and he’d been thinking of her kid and she couldn’t be mad about that.

  “I forgive you. And I appreciate you thinking about Chloe’s happiness. That means a lot that you put her first, because I do, too.”

  “I know you do.”

  Okay, if they didn’t start driving, she was totally going to cry. She didn’t want to cry. “All right, then, that’s settled. Can we motor? I don’t want to be late dropping Chloe off at Amanda’s.”

  Nate studied her for a second, checking to see if her forgiveness was as sincere as his apology had been. And while it wasn’t, quite, she offered the best smile she could. It seemed to be good enough because he picked up her hand, kissed the inside of her wrist, and put her hand above his knee before putting the SUV into reverse.

  She left it there the rest of the way home.

  ***

  “I’ve got a problem.”

  “I’ve got an answer. Let’s hope they match.”

  Nate rolled his eyes and was miffed Van wasn’t looking at the screen he was on. At least his huff was loud enough that it couldn’t be ignored. Good thing he was in his cabin, away from Birk and Michael and Heather and the campers who’d give him a hard time for being whiny. Sometimes a guy just needed a good sulk, and Van was always good for taking him down a peg or six. That’s not what he needed from her today, though.

  It had been a week since he’d taken Ruby and Chloe down to his parents’ place, and he couldn’t stop thinking about it. About them—as in him and Ruby—but also about all three of them, maybe as some kind of team or something. What the hell kind of sport would that be, with three people on a team? He couldn’t think of any, and Van definitely wouldn’t be any help there.

  “You’re so irritating, did you know that?”

  “I learned from the best, Nathansburger Friedrich Carter.”

  Van didn’t even look up at him, but kept her eyes on a different screen and her hands on the keyboard. Usually, he’d let her get away with it. She could probably talk to him, do whatever it was she was doing, and day trade on another screen without missing a beat. But this was serious. It was a situation that demanded the big guns.

  “Maybe I should call Willa instead.”

  Van’s fluttering fingers stilled, and she turned her gaze and her body to the screen their chat was running on. “Is that how it is? Maybe you should call Willa. Especially if this is what I think it’s about.”

  “What do you think it’s about?” Why was he hedging? He’d called to talk to Van, so now he fucking should.

  “I’m guessing it’s an issue with Ruby and not some problem you’re having at work. Or it’s a tennis thing. But if it were a tennis thing, you wouldn’t have even bothered to call me since I still barely know anything about the sport you Carters love so well. Hence, I’m betting on Ruby. What’s up?”

  Ugh. Van and her logic. She was right. But also the worst. And he was out of excuses. He should just spill the beans. All of them, all over the place.

  “I like her, Van. Like, really like her. She’s smart and funny and works really hard and she turns me on. I think about her all the time, and I arrange my schedule so I can spend as much time with her and Chloe as possible. We’re coming up on the end of summer, and I don’t want this to just be over.”

  There was a pause as Van studied him, and frankly, he didn’t like it. But just before he snapped at her for trying to mind-meld him or use the Force to drag the thoughts out of his head, she spoke up. “Let me get this straight. Ruby is basically perfect for you, and you like her kid. You’re realizing there’s an expiration date on your relationship and that’s making you unhappy?”

  Nate nodded, because yes, Van had the right of it. In response, Van tilted her head and widened her eyes as if she were waiting for Nate to say something more. But what more was there to say? He’d laid his cards on the table, and he needed her help to figure out what to do next.

  Without anything forthcoming, Van clearly got tired of waiting. “So do you maybe love her?”

  Whoa. Love Ruby? Did he? It was a surprising thought, but not outlandish. The more he turned it over in his head, the more he thought it might be true. Ruby was gorgeous, industrious, a great mom, and had exacting standards for everyone around her. She was clever and curious, and she rocked his damn world in bed. He played the words over in his mind, the soundtrack to the times they’d spent together and, yeah, that seemed to fit. But the only way to be certain would probably be to say it out loud. It was scary, but not as scary as he thought it’d be. “Yes, I love her.”

  Van’s eyebrows kicked up and for good reason. Nate didn’t think he’d ever said that about someone before. Maybe not even thought it. And if it were true, which it did indeed seem to be, then he’d definitely need to do something about that.

  “Then I’m not sure what the problem is?”

  If only everything were so simple. Not that things had been entirely straightforward for Van and Willa, but their problems had been eminently solvable. If he thought it’d make a damn bit of difference, he’d shut his laptop and go to Ruby’s house and tell her that he loved her. Of course, she was at work right now so he couldn’t, but even if he could, she’d probably give him one of those tight-lipped glares and say something along the lines of, “If wishes bought
fishes…” and then he’d get the urge to go out and buy her a whole sturgeon or some other giant fish. To prove to her that if she wished for something and it was within his power to give to her, then he would.

  “The problem is that I’m leaving camp in a couple of weeks. I have to go back to Boston, and she’ll be here. We could try to do the long-distance thing, but I don’t think that’d last long. I mean, I wouldn’t mind coming down to see her all the time since my schedule’s more flexible than hers, but she’d feel bad and try to come up to see me, but then she’d be even more exhausted and overextended than she already is, and—” He shoved his fingers into his hair and pressed against his eye sockets with the heels of his hands.

  “No, that’s not going to work. Not just for her either, but because of you, too. You’d miss her like hell and drive down there all the time to be with her.”

  Nate made a sound kind of like a frustrated penguin. At least, he’d wager that he did; he’d never heard what sound a frustrated penguin would make. Van was right.

  “Is there any chance she’d move?”

  Was there? Ruby had mentioned she wasn’t excited about the middle school Chloe would be going to in the fall—it had a reputation for being kind of a crap school. Chloe would miss her barn, but he’d find her one just as good to ride at. And if she didn’t like that one, he’d find her another. Ruby did like her house, though…except for the parts of it that were broken that she couldn’t afford to fix, even if she did teach herself how from YouTube videos. He could find her a house like it, though, with the all the good stuff and none of the bad. And hell, if he could only find a bad one, he could damn well afford to fix it. Or hold back the wall of panic over money he knew threatened Ruby every second of every day and let her fix it to her standards.

  “I don’t know if she’d do it. I mean, she has a life here and who the fuck am I? Some guy she’s been hanging out with who’s managed to not totally fuck up for most of a summer. I wouldn’t blame her if she wouldn’t.”

  The more he thought about it, the less he thought Ruby’d go for it. She was practical and protective of Chloe, and this would be the equivalent of throwing both of them off a cliff and expecting him to catch them. Of course, then Ruby would get down and stand on her own and yank Chloe back, but…that was a lot to ask. Too much.

  Van looked at him, narrowing her eyes. “Well, you aren’t gonna know until you ask, are you?”

  “No.” Fucking A, Van was annoying sometimes. Shouldn’t she be the one speculating and overanalyzing and, and, and… He should be the one coming up with solutions. He was an engineer for god’s sake. That’s what he did. But sometimes his solutions could be too practical. This one would definitely require some finesse. Maybe he should’ve called Willa.

  “You’re scowling a little there.”

  “Yes, I am.” And Van looked like she was about to crack up, mouth bunched up and eyes twinkling. Jerk.

  “Shoulda called Willa, huh?”

  “Yep.” He signed off to the sounds of Van cackling as he rolled his eyes.

  Chapter Sixteen

  Sweat dripped into his eyes as he bashed the ball hard over the net. Birk swung and missed, but it didn’t fucking matter.

  “Out,” Nate called. It was so close, and it’s not like Birk would’ve seen it because he’d practically been diving to return the shot, but Nate wouldn’t lie. He wouldn’t lie because he prided himself on his honesty and sportsmanship and being a stand-up guy, but he gritted his teeth because apparently none of that fucking mattered.

  Nate rubbed his wristband over his forehead, trying to sop up the sweat. One thing he liked about playing with Birk was that, despite being easygoing basically everywhere else, dude was a monster on the tennis court. He wasn’t as good as Nate, but he was good enough that Nate didn’t feel guilty about playing his best when they went head to head. Not like Birk took it easy on him when he’d talked Nate into sunrise yoga. Never fucking again. He’d rather do sprints for hours than suffer through another pretzel session.

  Birk trotted back with the ball after retrieving it from where it had rolled into the fence. “Got something on your mind? That line hasn’t left your forehead since we got here.”

  Perceptive menace. Why had he befriended the psychologist of all people?

  That wasn’t fair. Birk was a good dude, and he liked having someone to hang out with in person, not just through an internet connection.

  “Just serve already.”

  Birk’s brows went up at Nate’s growled response—did they teach that expression in psychology PhD programs or something? “Okay.”

  And of course, Nate totally whiffed the return. For fuck’s sake.

  Another thing they must teach in psychologist school was how to get people to talk when they didn’t want to. Birk didn’t ask him anything, didn’t say a goddamn word. No, he pulled a ball from his pocket and lined up his next serve. It was a good one, but this time Nate managed a return and they had a decent volley until Nate landed a sweet shot at the baseline that Birk couldn’t get his racquet to.

  That was more like it.

  He was feeling pretty good about Birk having shut his pie hole, until he made another serve just shy of the service line.

  Right when Nate had gotten into position for a textbook backhand, Birk spoke. “This doesn’t happen to have anything to do with why you’ve had Heather block out a few hours from your lesson schedule almost every day, does it?”

  Grace wasn’t exactly his middle name—although he was sure Van had called him that at some point—and Willa teased him for using strength more than finesse on the court, but he’d never describe himself as a klutz. Until he tripped over his own two feet and ate some serious hardcourt, missing the return in the process.

  As he rolled over, he heard Birk cursing from the other side of the court and the shuffle of running footsteps. He could’ve gotten up; he wasn’t actually hurt, aside from scraped knees and elbows, which was a hazard of the game on any day. But he lay there, letting the sundrenched warmth of the court soak into his back and allowing the sun to half-blind him as he looked up into the clear blue sky. Yep, he was a mess and a danger to himself and others. Apparently, he shouldn’t be allowed out in public when he was in love.

  Birk’s face and outstretched hand appeared in his vision, blocking out some of the sun, and while Nate could’ve stayed there for hours, he figured Birk would have more to say about that than if he got up. Guy clearly didn’t need any encouragement to dig into people’s affairs.

  He hopped to his feet with an assist from his friend and dusted off his ass before leveling a glare at Birk. “As a matter of fact it does.”

  “And does this reason have a name?”

  Sure, sure, play innocent. It was annoying that Birk could still look like a professional while bouncing a ball on the head of his racquet.

  Normally he’d shrug it off and tell Birk to get back to his side of the court. They had a match to finish. But he was struggling, hard, and Van had not been any goddamn help. “Ruby. Her name’s Ruby.”

  The corner of Birk’s mouth curled up in a smug smile, and he dribbled the ball a few times. “I know Ruby.”

  He hadn’t said it in a lascivious or provoking way, but nonetheless, Nate found himself wanting to punch Birk in the face. He’d heard other guys say that, so maybe it was just Birk’s face. Punchable. Clearly Birk had gotten used to people looking at him like that too, because he backpedaled, physically and verbally.

  “Not well. I just know her because she’s one of Anya’s servers when Ginger needs help for big events like Willa and Van’s wedding, and because I ran into her at Landry’s. I needed some new sneakers last season. I was all ready to take you on, and you had to go and break your leg.” Satisfied Nate probably wasn’t going to punch him anymore, Birk went on. “So are you dating, or…?”

  “As much as she’ll let me. I mean, yeah, I guess so. You know she has a kid?”

  As Birk shook his head and ambled b
ack toward the baseline on his own side of the court, Nate felt a little warmth in his belly. Ruby was really private and cautious. She hadn’t been forced to disclose Chloe to Birk the way she had been with him, but even after that, she’d been willing to have him around.

  “Well, she does. And they spent the weekend at my parents’ house with me.”

  When he put it like that, it sounded like they were pretty serious. And he kinda thought they were, but it was hard to tell with Ruby. Sometimes she let him in all the way and sometimes he felt like she was doing her best to keep him out.

  “So what’s the problem?”

  “She lives here, and I don’t. I don’t think she takes me seriously enough to change either of those things.”

  Which made him twitchy. Hadn’t he shown up? Hadn’t he done everything she’d asked? He’d proved himself, hadn’t he? What else did she need to know he was for real?

  At the baseline, Birk bounced the ball as he set up for his serve. “Well, I’m sure you’ll be able to work it out between the two of you.”

  Nate shook his head on his way to his own baseline. What could he do? How could he make Ruby see that he wasn’t going to flake, he wasn’t going to leave? How could he fix this? His engineer’s brain whirred to life at that thought. He was good at fixing problems. Very good. It’s why he got paid as much as he did, and it was why people called him in crises. He was a problem solver, and dammit, he could solve Ruby’s problems, too. And he’d solve them so good she wouldn’t even argue with him. Yep, that’s what he would do.

  He rocked on the balls of his feet, bent his knees a bit, and shifted his weight back and forth to prepare for Birk’s serve.

  ***

  Now that she was seeing Nate play tennis, she had to wonder why she’d resisted so damn hard coming to camp. So okay, it was less than awesome to see all these people milling around, all relaxed and happy and looking like they were taking this place for granted. Especially when most of her memories consisted of serving rich people expensive food.