Written in the Sand

by Marie , J

  How could I not be?

  I wondered at that moment if she would be the death of me. I felt like I was standing on the edge of the cliff, looking over, begging to fall into heavenly bliss. Hell, even if I fell to my gruesome death it would be worth it. I knew I’d still see an angel in my dreams.

  “I’m gonna need you to stop making those sexy noises over there, darlin’.”

  “Oh, I’m sorry. Is it making you want other things?” She giggled at me and I laughed because for the first time she was free to be herself with me and I loved every fucking second of it.

  “You keep doing it and you’ll see what happens. There’s plenty of places around here I could sneak you off to do sinfully naughty things. Do not tempt me. I’m trying to be a gentleman, but I only have so much self-control when it comes to you, sweetheart.”

  She picked up another churro and although she didn’t make a noise, this time, she rolled her eyes into the back of her head like she’d just had the best mouth orgasm of her life. I was so jealous, but if things pan out the way I wanted. I’d have her open for me later, spread out of my bed while I feasted on her like a starving man.

  “Hey, are you going to have one?” She looked at me questioningly and the corner of my lip quirked into a smile.

  “Only if you feed it to me.” And she did just that.

  Everything about this date had been like a fairy tale. Beau had been the perfect gentleman. He was kind, gentle, giving, funny, and naughty in the best possible way. It felt like a dream date, one you only thought about as a young woman. What woman doesn’t want to go to the county fair on a date with the man she’s been crushing on?

  The way he kisses makes my toes curl in my boots and the way he works my body like a string instrument, playing the sweetest symphony is something I’ve only ever read about in trashy romance books. Yet, he’s real and he’s doing everything right.

  I wondered what the rest of the night held for us as I looked into his dark brown eyes.

  “So, what’s up next for tonight, darlin’?”

  “Well, Reagan invited us to go sing karaoke and drink with them later…”

  He quirked an eyebrow. “Do you really want to hang out with my sister and Rhett?”

  I shook my head. The answer was no. I wanted to spend the night with Beau. To do all the things that normal couples in relationships did with each other. To feel his rough hand against my own as he held it. To feel the warmth of his body pressed against me. To feel his lips on my skin, burning good memories into my soul.

  “There’s an opening concert tonight. I can’t remember who the band is, but I’ve heard they’re good. I know we’re coming back next Friday to see Chris Lane. It could be fun… dancing, music, drinks…”

  “I’d love to go with you.”

  “That’s my girl…” He looked up at me in shock as the words escaped his lips. Almost as though he hadn’t really expected to say them and was nervous about how I would react to the fact that he did.

  I smiled over at him.

  He chuckled at me. “Hey, lean over here… you’ve got some stuff on your…”

  I leaned over and his fingers brushed the sides of my lips as if a lightning bolt charged up and ran down my veins. “Lips. There, I got it.”

  He smiled that devilish, heaven-help-me-smile and I almost melted. How one touch could send electricity shooting through me was still incredible.

  How could one single look make me feel like the most cherished woman in the whole entire world? Before I came home, I was beginning to think that my life was over. That there was no way up from here, but month by month Beau was changing my view on life, making me a true believer that anything is possible. That maybe not every bad thing is coming my way and just maybe I can have a tiny shred of joy. Of peace. To have the love that I watch my mother and father share with each other.

  I want it.

  I want it all and I want it with Beau. The man who’s showing me that love isn’t scary. I don’t have to be scared of the person that tells me they love me. I don’t have to fear that every ‘I love you’ is going to come with something expected or a bad consequence. I don’t have to keep looking over my shoulder at the past wondering what happens next and if it will kill me.

  “So… more games so I can impress you with my manly strength or the concert? You decide.”

  “Concert. I already know you’re manly, Beau. You’re one of the best men I’ve ever met.”

  He raised up from the picnic table, extending his hand to me. “Well, we’ve got a concert to get to then.”

  I placed my small hand in his larger calloused one. This is a man who has worked for a living. Has seen the earth at its best and worst and still continues to make a profit from her. Beau was so unlike Andrew that I didn’t know why my brain even thought about comparing them. I rose from my seat and he pulled me around the picnic table so we were standing side by side. He lifted up my hand gently and kissed it. His lips against my skin yet again sent tingles shivering down my body. I was in deep and if this was hell then let me perish in the flames forever.

  We made our way zigging and zagging through the fairgrounds. A thrill of excitement coursed through my body. The bright lights. The crowd. The sounds. The dust kicked up from running barrels. The wind flapped through my hair as we went sixteen seconds flat in a barrel pattern. Being atop a twelve-hundred-pound animal with the grace and agility to run such a course. We passed the arena where the barrels were already set up for tomorrow and I could see every detail in my mind’s eye.

  The banner for Trea Landon lit up the stage, indicating he was the headliner for tonight. The field was lit up in bright colors of green and blue, spotlighting the stage. A drum set sat in the middle towards the back of the stage, while everything else surrounded it, just how I’d pictured it. It would be the first concert I’d ever been to and I was finding it another favorite to add to my ever-growing list of firsts with Beau. Favorite first kiss, first orgasm, first Beau official date, and hopefully later would be the first time he’d ask me to come to bed with him.

  A current coursed through my body, my veins feeling electric and jittery, as though I’d burst into flames at any moment. I was a good kind of nervous. I was excited about the unexpected. A vast difference from the last several years of my life where I felt like a spinning top—never moving forward, never growing, never changing… forever stuck in the same spin.

  I felt alive. I was living on my own accord without having to answer to anyone. I wasn’t looking over my shoulder at the past, waiting for the other shoe to drop. I gained so much confidence in myself over the last couple of months of living with Beau and Reagan. Being around a man like him solidified the fact that good men still existed in this crazy world. Andrew was just evil incarnate to the very core of his existence. I knew that whatever came next we would face together, Beau and I. He would protect me. Keep me safe, like always. I trusted him.

  I’m starting to see the girl I used to be—the fearless, confident one that wasn’t afraid to do whatever she wanted. Homecoming queen. Reigning barrel champ at the county fair. The popular girl in high school. I was happy again. Not in love, not yet, but I could tell that’s where it was heading. Beau hadn’t pressured me to say those words or said them to me again, but I could tell he felt it. He respected the fact that I wanted to take this slow. To go at my own pace. Problem is, I didn’t know if I really wanted to go slow anymore. He was crashing through every single wall I’d barricaded against my heart, while I stood on the sidelines watching piece by piece crumble and fall to the ground in shatters. The emotions left me exposed and vulnerable, scared, but also excited about the new possibilities of there being an “us.”

  The crowd flowed in around us as the music started to play. A soft medley of drums and guitar kicked up and the crowd went wild. The song told of a girl who had never known the love of a country boy. “You don’t know love, ‘til you’ve been loved by a country boy,” he crooned into the microphone. I listened to
every single lyric intently and swayed along, back and forth like a gentle breeze. Beau slid up behind me, hands placed gently on my hips and rocked to the music with me. My eyes trailed the crowd, noticing how many cell phones were lighting up the night sky like tiny fairies flying around surrounded by the brightest of stars. My heart felt full like lightning bugs in a mason jar.

  “Do you have any idea how beautiful you look tonight, Cassidy Mae?” He leaned in, whispering in my ear. His hot breath was magnetic against my skin.

  “Mmm…What?” Was the only thing I could murmur out. I was so lost in this moment with him, completely consumed by the night sky, the music, and swaying with the man of my dreams. I felt his lips against me as he pressed a tender kiss to the nape of my neck. One perfect moment. One single second where the world completely fell away and I was left swaying to a love song in the middle of a cell phone lit field with the man who was stealing my heart.

  My man.

  It felt weird calling him that, but it also felt right. Our moment of silence was broken by the sound of clapping as the song came to an end.

  The song that followed was upbeat and my body flowed with the music. I lifted my hands in praise to the sky and danced like I was the only one in the middle of the crowd. Beau pulled me into him and I did the one thing I’d always wanted to try. I rubbed against him. My hips and ass pressed up tightly to the ever-growing bulge in the front of his pants. I could tell he liked it by the way his breath caught and then got heavy. This was no longer sweet and simple swaying, no… this was foreplay in the best way. I was giving him just a taste of what I wanted him to do to me later on.

  I wanted him to feel my body pressed against him and know that I wanted this just as badly as he did. My skin crawled with need for him. Desire was lurking right under the surface, waiting to be let out.

  His arms snaked around my body and I enjoyed the feeling of being cradled against this big, strong masculine masterpiece. I could feel his muscles ripple as he held me tightly against him. My back pressed firmly against his chest and I could feel every time he flexed or moved with me. It was a turn on and I could honestly say that I’d ever felt that way about a man before now. Not even with Andrew and I was married to him.

  “Do you have any idea how good you feel wrapped up in me, darlin’? It’s giving me so many dirty thoughts about what I’m planning to do to you later…” A blush ran up my face, heating my cheeks and my core clenched at the thought of it. I was heated and heavy, left wanting more. I wished we were the only ones on this dimly lit make-shift dance floor. I closed my eyes and got lost in the moment. Me and him.

  I wanted to kiss him, but as I started to turn around to face him, he tsked at me.

  “Don’t move, unless you want everyone in here to see exactly what you’re doing to me and how I’m feeling about you right now.”

  A single giggle escaped my lips. “Oh.” I slipped my hand behind my back and ran my fingers along the bulge of his Levi’s. He growled, pulling my hair away to nip at my neck. His arousal evident. Again, I smiled, liking that he let me in. He always had a way of showing me exactly what he liked or how he felt about me. He didn’t just expect me to guess what he was thinking or wanted like Andrew always had. I had never been good at the mind games.

  Damn it. I mentally reprimanded myself. I really needed to stop comparing them, it wasn’t fair to Beau. He would never be scum like Andrew.

  He must’ve felt me flinch when I realized that I’d done it again. Something I told myself and promised Beau I wouldn’t do again.

  “You okay, Cass?” He asked softly.

  I nodded. “Oh…um, yeah, I’m good.”

  “You sure? You can tell me if I’m making you feel uncomfortable at all. That’s the last thing I want.” He said, turning me around to fully face him.

  I grinned up at him. “Yep, never been better, actually. This is perfect.”

  “That’s my girl.” He leaned in and kissed my lips briefly, and just like always, it turned into a frantic rush of tongues, carving paths alongside one another. Lust filled and heated; I wanted it to consume me.

  I moaned as he kissed me deeper, more fervently. His tongue caressing every inch of my own.

  “You want to get out of here, sweetheart?” He looked into my eyes like he was reading my soul. Looking for any sign that I would deny his wish.

  I nodded. “Desperately.”

  “You absolutely sure? We can go have drinks and meet up with Reagan if you want to…”

  “No, I want to be alone…with you.”

  A groan permeated the air around us. “You’re killing me here, baby. You one hundred percent sure you’re ready for all of this?” He waved at himself and I couldn’t help but smile.

  “Positive.”

  He kissed me again and then pulled away. Reaching out for my hand, I placed it in his as we snuck out through the crowd. I hugged the unicorn to my chest as we ran, a starlit sky lighting the path before us into the night. Moonlight streamed down as we made our way through the tree line of the fairgrounds, hues of silver bathing us in light. By the time we reached his truck, our breathing was heavy and labored but we laughed anyhow. We needed each other in a way I hadn’t felt a need before or at least one not this strong. I wanted to be wrapped up in him as he was in me.

  He opened my truck door and I hopped in.

  “Ever the gentleman, Beau Montgomery,” I said with a coy smile.

  “Only for you, my darlin’. Only for you.” He winked before kissing me and then closed the door. His feet took him quickly around the car and I watched as muscles bunched under his shirt as he hopped in the seat beside me. I was sitting in the middle of the truck because I couldn’t bear to be that far away from him right now. This ride seemed like the longest ride of our lives, overridden with lust and desire to have what we’d been denying ourselves for the past couple of months.

  Need coursed through me.

  I reached for his hand to place it where I wanted him most and he shook his head.

  “No, Cass. If I do that now, we aren’t going anywhere and as much as I want to have you naked and panting below me in the bed of this truck, our first time needs to be special for you. I want to do things right by you. So… raincheck on all the dirty truck sex thoughts you’re having right now?”

  “For now, but just because you won’t bang me here doesn’t mean we can’t do other things.” I giggled.

  He raised an eyebrow at me. “What are you thinking, Cass?”

  I put my finger to my lips, “Shhhh… you let me worry about that.” I had never felt this confident when it came to sex, but I’d found this new found freedom and I wanted to indulge in it, if only for a while.

  “Alright, Cass. You do what you want to.” Turning the key to start the truck, he looked over and winked at me.

  I moved my hand over to the belt of his pants, making my intentions known. I wanted to touch him, but not distract him too much. If only just to give him a little preview of what was to come when we got home.

  “Whoa, let me pull over for a minute. So, I can get you more access, my greedy girl.”

  “Well, what are you waiting for, sexy?”

  He pulled the truck to the side of the path and stopped. I watched his fingers quickly wrestle the belt buckle and button undone on his pants. I heard the hiss of his zipper as he pulled it down.

  “There, sweetheart, that better?”

  “Uh-huh. No boxers?” I said, sliding my hand inside his pants and feeling the warmth of him already pulsing, hot, and standing at attention for me. I wrapped my hand around him and a groan erupted from his lips.

  “Not tonight. Truth is, I was in such a rush to get ready I forgot. I don’t mind it now though. God, I’d almost forgotten how good I feel in your hand, Cass. It’s so hot.” His eyes were fixed on my hand as I worked him up and down. I wondered what it felt like for a guy. Was it the same feeling I had when I’ve pleasured myself? I didn’t think so, but I wasn’t sure.

  “Wha
t does it feel like when I do this?” I whispered.

  Another groan erupted from his throat. His breath heavy, he responded, “Like damn heaven.”

  His dark brown eyes met mine. “Not.. gonna last too long, Cass. Feels way… way too good. I don’t even care if I embarrass myself right now. I’ve lost control. You have magical hands, woman.”

  I watched his head fall back against the seat; his mouth open in silent praise. His Adam’s apple bobbed up and down as he swallowed and it was one of the sexiest things I’d ever seen.

  “Cass… gonna…” He didn’t even get the words out before my hand was covered in warmth. “Sorry…I tried to warn you.”

  I shrugged, “Beau, it’s a normal thing. I’m not the least grossed out by it…but do you have any napkins in here?” My eyes scanned the truck briefly as he pointed to the glovebox.

  “Yeah, in here.” He leaned across me, opening the glovebox, and handing me a napkin.

  I wiped off my hands and felt his lips against my cheek. My eyes found his immediately. “That was incredible, darlin’. Now, let’s get you home so I can enjoy you all to myself.”

  “Wait, what about Reagan?” I said suddenly remembering that Beau didn’t live alone.

  “She won’t be home tonight.”

  “Why do you say that?”

  “She texted me earlier, said not to wait up. She’s going to stay with Rhett tonight. I don’t like it, but I like the idea of you in my bed naked even more so I’m letting it slide.”

  “Oh really, naked in your bed, huh?” I was being naughty and I knew it.

  “You keep it up over there and I won’t let you come until I’m ready for you too.”

  “You wouldn’t…”

  “You wanna try me, sweetheart?” He gave me the most devilish smile. Liar.