Stay Mad, Sweetheart

by Heleen Kist

  The director, who’d kept quiet until then, said, ‘This strikes me as something you should have resolved with Justin. I find the way you’ve called this meeting without him quite inappropriate. And however much I believe in equal pay for equal work, being a solicitor by trade, I know that you would be on shaky ground with a claim.’

  I sighed. He’d gone there; litigation.

  My decision on that was already made: I would never file a suit. It would put the deal at risk. Justin might have cheated me, but I wasn’t about to cheat all our employees out of their hard-earned financial windfall.

  It was also too late to threaten to resign, like Justin had done, because that would need to be declared to the acquirers. Even though PeopleForce would have tens of super-talented data scientists in California who could do my job, the fact that half of Empisoft’s new technology sat inside the head of a founder who might resign could easily spook them away.

  I had only one card left. ‘I disagree with my claim for equality being on shaky ground. If anything...’ I couldn’t believe I was about to say this. It felt so big headed. So masculine. Suki had pressed onto me I’d just be doing what any man would do; bluster. ‘If anything, I am the most important person in this company.’

  ‘How so?’ he snarled.

  ‘Are you familiar yet with our newest Network Impact model?’

  ‘Yes, I saw it listed in the product roadmap. It looks very interesting, this ability to identify the so-called heroes and villains in a company on the basis of their influence on others. It’s good work.’

  I bit my lip and went for it. ‘I ran the data on Empisoft... The hero here is me.’

  There was a moment of silence.

  ‘That may be the case, Ms Flett.’ My heart sank: Ms Flett again. ‘But that model has not been validated. Either way, I think it’s time to let it lie, don’t you? You stand to make a double-digit million-pound return for a few years of your life. This seems like fair recompense. Surely it’s not worth rocking the boat for a measly million more?’

  I wanted to scream, ‘That’s not the point. That’s not the frigging point.’ I composed myself. The last thing I needed was to be accused of being a shrieking woman.

  ‘I could ask you the same thing, Mr Chair. Why not do the honourable thing? It’s only a few growth options. They would only dilute the other shareholders by a measly one percent.’

  This was language that Suki coached me on. She’d explained that the value of the company remained the same no matter how many shares were handed out. Like the size of a pie remained the same no matter how many slices you cut it into. If one person’s slice got bigger, everybody else’s slice would shrink a little. In finance terms, they would be ‘diluted’.

  But it seemed their pie slices were too attractive. They didn’t cave.

  ‘It’s too late, Laura,’ said the other director gently, perhaps trying to play good cop. ‘I’m sure that I speak on behalf of all of us when I say that it would only be right and proper to reward you in some way. Perhaps we can give you a pay rise? But we are on the final stretch with the PeopleForce acquisition and the share structures have already been distributed at the highest level in their management. We can’t change them at this stage. And say what? That we made a mistake in the numbers? They might start to wonder where else we’ve made mistakes. That risks prolonging the due diligence even more, them wanting to go through everything with a fine-tooth comb again. Surely you don’t want that any more than we do?’

  ‘That’s it? Justin threatened to resign and gets a reward, whereas I never complained and get nothing?’ I asked.

  ‘Maybe you should have paid more attention at the time,’ said the Chair.

  My heart sank. My battle was lost.

  At least Claire got what she wanted. And hopefully Suki would fare as well.

  38

  SUKI

  ‘Good night, Suki,’ said the Aussie temp from reception ending his usual round of turning off unnecessary lights. He loosened his tie and collected a few abandoned cups. ‘Is it going to be a late one?’

  ‘No, it should be fine, thanks. Is that everyone?’ She’d seen a number of her colleagues come and go during the day, but ever since she started to look at the place through a new lens, she’d distanced herself.

  It helped that most of them were in London half the time, given that’s where the clients and the work tended to be. She was delighted the tech scene in Scotland was strong enough that she didn’t have to be a ‘Willie.’ She smiled. It was Pam who’d first introduced her to the expression: Work In London, Live In Edinburgh. Suki reckoned that, being single, she wasn’t in a position to judge; but she was still surprised at this ever-increasing breed of Monday-morning, latte-sipping, trolley-hauling, blue-suited airport dwellers in financial services who chose to be apart from their family rather than sacrifice the wife and kids’ standard of living.

  ‘Only you and Diane left,’ the temp said as he left.

  Perfect.

  Suki slid her stockinged feet into the shoes she’d kicked off for comfort earlier and wriggled her toes to pump-prime the blood circulation. She took a deep breath, the dry cardboard air of a not-yet-paperless office filling her lungs.

  Lying awake in bed the night before, she’d rehearsed the conversation ten different ways. She was hoping to appeal to Diane’s professionalism and sense of fair play.

  Sadly, that hadn’t worked out too well for Laura. Poor Laura. Too trusting, wanting to believe logic and decency would win the day. Look where that got her.

  Turning her mind back to her own needs, Suki wondered where Diane’s loyalties would lie. She suspected it would probably all boil down to ego again, ambition. Why did that have to cloud everything in business?

  Diane’s office was next to Angus’s at the end of the corridor. Suki figured his was slightly larger to reflect his status as managing partner; but Diane had the benefit of longer stretches of natural light.

  Suki knocked on the door and entered when summoned.

  ‘Hello, Suki. What can I do for you? I was about to pack up.’ Diane stood by her cabinet, placing manila folders neatly into its drawers. Somehow, her shoulder-padded power suit had survived the day without a single wrinkle and her bob flicked into a perfect curl at her chin.

  ‘I was hoping to have a chat,’ Suki said.

  ‘Is it about PeopleForce?’

  ‘No, it’s more to do with the firm.’

  Diane stopped filing and searched Suki’s face. ‘Oh?’

  ‘May I?’ Suki gestured towards the two armchairs that surrounded a coffee table littered with tombstones. She cast her eye over a few of these engraved crystal trophies, checking which of the firm’s successful conclusions of a merger, acquisition or substantial investment they represented.

  ‘Sure.’ Diane pointed at her desk. ‘Will I need to take notes?’

  ‘I don’t think so. I wanted to have a word... Woman to woman.’

  As they sat, Diane asked, ‘What’s this all about? Have you got a complaint?’

  ‘More of an observation... and a question.’

  ‘Shoot,’ Diane said. She tucked her hair behind her ear, which Suki recognised as a no doubt well-practised subtle signal to convey to clients she was listening.

  Suki gathered her own hair with a rapid scoop and pulled it forward over one shoulder, her neck exposed to Diane, the two women sitting bare ear to bare ear. ‘I’m wondering what your view is on the firm from a gender equality point of view.’ She detected a small twitch in Diane’s eyebrow. ‘When you hired me, I assumed that, with a female partner, this would be a good place to work. You’re such an amazing role model. The deals you’ve done...’ Suki gestured towards the crystal tombstones.

  Diane frowned. ‘You’re leading the Empisoft acquisition — our biggest project at the moment. I don’t understand what more you want.’

  ‘This isn’t about status or responsibility,’ Suki said. ‘It’s about the culture. I find the firm... backward. You kn
ow, boys being boys. Inappropriate jokes. Sexist, homophobic undertones. Angus’s patronising attitude and bullying ways. I would have thought this would be something you cared about.’

  ‘I see. Well, what can I say?’ Diane shrugged. ‘Welcome the world of finance. The young ones will grow out of it and dinosaurs like Angus will retire soon enough. Trust me, it used to be a lot worse when I started out.’

  Did she really just dismiss it all out of hand? Suki sat up straight. ‘That doesn’t make it right.’

  ‘No, it doesn’t. I’m remarking on the journey that we women have already undertaken. I may have reached senior partner, but it’s through hard graft and putting up with a lot of crap. There were no female role models at all in my day. There was no feminist movement — not even laws that guaranteed equal pay or fair treatment. You wanted to reach the top? You had to work like the men and play like the men.’ Without any sense of irony, she reached for the whisky and poured them both a drink. ‘The less you looked and sounded like a woman, the better you did. You either shut up and uncrossed your legs to get ahead or made knob jokes with the rest of them.’

  The whisky burned in Suki’s throat.

  ‘So no, we’re not fully there yet,’ Diane continued. ‘We can’t rock the boat too quickly. We’re making such great progress. Slowly but surely. Look at you! And to be honest, I can’t say I’ve noticed it at Madainn all that much.’

  Suki nearly spat her drink out. ‘Well, you wouldn’t, would you? This is not the kind of behaviour that is targeted at the boss. Or at one’s mother...’

  Diana lost all the pink from her cheeks. ‘What are you accusing Robert of? What has he done to you?’

  Had Suki hit a working mother nerve? Criticise a woman at work, fine, but criticise her mothering at your peril.

  ‘God, Diane. I’ve not been raped or anything,’ Suki said. ‘It didn’t even bother me that much at first. Like you said, it’s endemic to finance, what’s to be expected. But come on, you must know the culture in here is toxic. And that’s something that either comes from the top or is condoned by the top — or in this case, both.’ Suki breathed deeply while the accusation hung in the air.

  Diane rubbed the rim of her glass with her thumb and forefinger.

  ‘I know about the payoffs,’ Suki said. ‘About Pam, and before. There are hardly any women left — how can you let Angus get away with this?’

  For an instant, Diane looked confused. She quickly collected herself. ‘What would you have me do?’

  ‘You said so yourself, he’s a dinosaur. And he’s a bad example. You’ve managed to keep his payoff secret — to an extent. But it is bound to come out. If you deal with him firmly, the others will be shaken enough to fall into line.’

  Diane listened with a cocked head and squeezed eyes that suggested her brain was thinking it though.

  Suki reached for Diane’s arm. ‘Angus won’t change just because we ask him to. You have to make him change... or maybe even leave?’

  Diane’s lips curled at the sides and a fire shone in her eyes. ‘Let’s explore this a little further — hypothetically, of course. If I were interested in your suggestion, what did you have in mind?’

  ‘Angus has a mistress. Hypothetically, we could hit him with that.’

  Diane burst out laughing.

  Suki’s cheeks tingled.

  ‘My dear girl, you want to blackmail Angus about his mistress? Everybody knows about his mistress — even his wife knows about his mistress.’ Diane drowned the chuckles with some more booze. She turned serious. ‘It’s also a personal matter. One that really doesn’t affect me. If we want to do this, we need to use something better.’

  We.

  Suki had her. A partner in crime — or in this case in justice.

  ‘But it does affect you,’ Suki said. ‘As I understand it, his extramarital activities are billed to the firm,’ said Suki.

  ‘Yes, well... I’m not in favour of inviting an examination of our books.’

  Damn. Back to square one.

  Diane drummed her fingers on her knee and gave Suki a sideways glance. ‘I do know another way that we could bring him down. I’d need your help.’

  Suki’s smile stretched as wide as it could. ‘I’m in.’

  ‘Good,’ said Diane. ‘Because once the girls are in charge, we’ll all be better off, won’t we?’

  39

  ME

  No matter how much I cleared my inbox every day, it would fill up again overnight as the USA woke up. Today was no different: my inbox was teeming with emails from salespeople eager to give me a demo of their latest technology solution. Their tactics were more brazen the higher the value of a contract with Empisoft might be to them.

  On the edge of my desk lay a cheap phone one guy had sent to me with a note asking me to turn it on and he’d call, any time day or night. It was impossible for him to know if or when I would comply, and I imagined this desperate chap dialling the number every hour on the hour in the faint bonus-fuelled hope that I would pick up. I felt some kinship with him today; it was as futile an exercise as my attempt to reason with the board had been.

  Mid-morning, Claire summoned Suki and me via WhatsApp to A New Leaf at noon. I asked what was so urgent. She wouldn’t say.

  I thought of possible reasons for having the Avengers regroup. One scenario that wouldn’t happen was Claire somehow discovering a clever solution to the Justin problem I had failed to resolve. Even though our fun brainstorming sessions had shown her to have a rapid, wicked mind, Claire’s knowledge of finance or technology wouldn’t stretch that far.

  Perhaps, like with Darren, the trick was to play with Justin’s ego. Lord knows it was big enough. And it wasn’t an act anymore, like it had been when we’d started Empisoft; two snot-nosed young graduates trying to convince investors and big, serious potential customers that they knew what they were doing. A bit like the emails in front of me. To this day, I could still feel the blushes I’d been unable to keep at bay when presenting. Justin had done drama at school and was able to better contain his nerves, so it made sense to make him take care of that side.

  I remembered how we’d practised his pitches over and over until they came so easily that he eventually exuded a natural confidence. It worked, and the business grew. As did his public profile, which he loved. He was now well-known across the technology scene, gathering geeky — and female — admirers. I smirked. Little Scotland’s answer to Elon Musk.

  I replied to Claire’s message with a thumbs-up.

  What could she have in mind?

  The whole thing was terribly distracting, and I struggled to focus on the newest due diligence requests from PeopleForce that Suki had sheepishly shared that morning. Until then, Suki had believed we were on the home stretch.

  Where was she, anyway? She was due to come and help.

  I adjusted the headings in one of my databases. The other side’s team hadn’t been able to make sense of what I sent across before. It was tedious, albeit necessary work.

  As Suki never showed, I left for the bistro alone at the required time.

  I wished we’d chosen somewhere else for our team base. The crowds were getting tedious, as was the crap on the way. By the end of the festival each year, the colourful celebration of all things cultural grew into a messy, flyer-strewn, poster-plastered extravaganza of bad taste. And the giant, inflatable purple cow-shaped venue that occupied the best part of Teviot Place was the worst culprit.

  Thankfully, it was still quite early for lunch, and the tourists were only starting to show their faces, after late nights of shouty comedy.

  There were a few empty tables in the restaurant. Suki was sitting in their usual booth, tapping away at her phone.

  ‘Hi. I was expecting you in the office,’ I said.

  ‘Yes, sorry. It’s all getting a little hectic. PeopleForce are seriously starting to put the pressure on, and for some reason are asking for all sorts of new information. They’re not even hiding the fact that they’r
e talking to your competitor anymore. It’s a worry. I’m hoping it’s just posturing.’ She put her phone down and ran her fingers through her hair to keep it out of her coffee. ‘How are you? Heard any more from Claire?’

  ‘No. She should be here any minute.’ I grabbed the menu.

  Suki waved her hand in the air. A new waitress stood by the display that held the various pre-made salads to take away.

  As our orders were being taken, Claire stormed in. She unwrapped her oversized knit scarf from around her neck and dumped it next to me together with a shopping bag. She shooed Suki to make room, sat and barked at the innocent waitress who’d asked if she wanted a drink. ‘I won’t be staying.’

  ‘Bloody hell, Claire. What’s up with you?’ Suki asked.

  ‘It’s all gone to pot. And it’s all your fault,’ she said, jutting her chin out at me.

  ‘What did I do?’ My throat constricted. I’d never been good with being yelled at — not that it had ever happened much outside of gym class.

  Claire’s eyes were ablaze. ‘Why did you send the picture of the trespasser at Adam Mooney’s party to his people?’

  ‘What? That was ages ago,’ I replied.

  ‘What are you talking about?’ Suki asked.

  ‘Miss Genius here seems to have given Adam Mooney’s publicist a photo from the opening party for his play that shows there was a trespasser hiding away, taking pictures of all the guests.’

  ‘I’m confused,’ Suki said. ‘What is this photo, Laura?’

  ‘It’s nothing. I was trying to find who had released the photo of Emily with Adam Mooney that got onto the Internet and led to all the personal abuse. And the official photographer, Craig, found there had been a trespasser. We had no way to identify him. I gave it to the police, who were completely unhelpful, saying this was a private security matter. Then I sent it to Adam’s people, thinking maybe they could do something with it. Also, I thought the guy might be stalking Adam and they could keep an eye out. What does this have to do with anything?’