Until You're Mine (Fighting for Her)

by Cindi Madsen

  My laugh wasn’t forced this time, but Liam’s glare made me clamp it down.

  “Talk later,” Shane said, giving me a nod before heading across the gym.

  I rounded my desk and tugged on the back of Liam’s shirt before he could escape. “Please don’t be too hard on him. Everyone makes mistakes. Except for maybe you, but since you won’t tell me what happened with the person I can’t mention, I can’t be sure.”

  He gritted his teeth. “She left for a job, and I wished her good luck, which I meant and still do. People move. Things change—that’s the only thing that stays the same.”

  “Wow. If things don’t work out here, you’ve got a future in writing cards for Hallmark.”

  He gave a short, humorless laugh, so obviously none of my jokes ever lightened the mood. “If things don’t change, we’re all going to be looking for new jobs. Sometimes I regret letting Finn and Dad talk me into getting you back here for the summer to help. You got out, and now we’re just pulling you into a mess. This life, this job… In order to make it, it requires being selfish, not to mention sacrifice after sacrifice.” His eyes met mine. “Nothing’s guaranteed, Brooklyn. So make sure you’re doing what makes you happy.”

  I opened my mouth, and he quickly said, “And don’t say Knox, or I might seriously blow a gasket.”

  I laughed, so at least one of us was. “I so wouldn’t go there. Mostly because I’m already afraid you’ll kill him.”

  “Yeah, me, too.” He shook his head and took a step away before abruptly turning around. “The fact of the matter is, I like the guy. And I want you to be happy.”

  Something about his words made the hairs on my arm rise. All good, yet there was an underlying but.

  He stepped closer and the way he dropped his voice only made a sense of foreboding crawl over my skin. “I’m not just being the grouchy, overprotective big brother. This is more than that. I didn’t step in when you threw away everything you wanted to be with that prick who—”

  I flinched, and he left it hanging, because we both knew what the guy did.

  “I’m not going to stand by this time. Whether it’s Dad pushing you for what he wants you to do, or if it’s Shane. If you stepped back from the situation and really looked at it, you’d see that you’re risking too much on a temporary situation. Only it’s not just you and your feelings at risk. The future of the gym and Knox’s career are thrown into the mix, too. If you were staying, then maybe I could see you both taking that risk. But last I heard, you’re leaving us here pretty quick…”

  Maybe even sooner than I originally thought, depending on a lot of variables that I hadn’t had time to fully think through.

  “Has that changed?” Liam challenged.

  I shook my head, even though a tiny, weak part of me wanted to say maybe. Which in turn, made me wonder if I was losing myself again. How could I even be considering staying? Giving up everything I’d worked for the past four years…?

  “So, you’re taking a chance on a guy for a couple of weeks, and he’s taking a chance on you that could determine his whole career. Brooklyn, if Knox goes all in, I know he can go far, even farther than he climbed the first time. The question is, are you going to help him, or hold him back?”

  Chapter Forty-Two

  Shane

  The knock on my door Sunday afternoon surprised me because the person I’d been expecting today was already at my apartment.

  After the last few days of craziness, I was almost scared to hope it’d be who I wanted it to be. When I opened my door and saw Brooklyn standing on the other side, beautiful as ever, I fought back the urge to haul her into my place and lock her in, and went for grabbing and kissing her breathless instead.

  The dazed look on her face sent satisfaction through my veins, and I tried to convince myself the weird tension that’d been hanging over us since Tuesday didn’t exist. “God, I’ve missed you.”

  She curled her hands into my shirt, my Brooklyn there in my arms for a couple of awesome seconds before the serious version that’d ruled the past few days took over. She opened her mouth, but the loud throat-clearing that reminded me we weren’t alone made her whip her head toward the kitchen, and she quickly dropped her hands to her sides. “Sorry, I should’ve called.”

  I wrapped my arm around her shoulders and guided her to my side so she wouldn’t act on her obvious urge to flee. “Brooklyn, I want you to meet my mom, Tammy Oliver. Mom, this is Brooklyn. The girl I was telling you about.”

  Brooklyn blinked at me as if she was surprised I’d talk about her. Clearly she didn’t understand what a big role she currently played in my life. What a big role I wanted her to play, for longer than a summer. Which meant I needed to tell her, and I planned to as soon as we got a chance to be alone.

  She shook off her surprise and extended her hand to my mom. “Nice to meet you.”

  Mom sandwiched Brooklyn’s hand in both of hers, squeezing affectionately instead of shaking. The woman fell for people right on the spot, and thanks to my going on and on about my girl, Mom had already been a fan before the official meeting. “I was hoping I’d get a chance to meet you soon. Shane’s told me so much about you. About meeting you at the gym and how you helped him land this fight, something I’d also like to thank you for. He told me how pretty and smart and funny you are, and his entire face lit up when he told me how lucky he feels to have found you.”

  If embarrassment meant lighting up, my face would be a neon billboard now. “I also mentioned that I was trying to play it cool so I didn’t scare her off, but evidently you have selective hearing.”

  “Guilty as charged,” Mom said with a laugh, and Brooklyn smiled, then immediately appeared conflicted about it. Or about me. Shit, I didn’t know, and it was driving me crazy. She’d insisted on giving me space so that she “didn’t get in the way of my training.” Something else was going on, though, and I intended to find out by the end of the day. Maybe then I could actually focus on something besides how everything seemed off with us the past few days, all her thinly veiled excuses leaving me confused and frustrated.

  “Dinner’s in the oven, and I’d love if you joined us.” Mom ruffled my hair like I was a kid, the fact that I’d been far past that when I’d come to live with her notwithstanding. “I worry that Shane doesn’t get enough good meals. I don’t care how much protein his shakes have, growing boys need real food.”

  “Pretty sure I stopped growing years ago, and if I’m not careful, I’ll be too heavy at weigh-in.”

  Mom swiped a hand through the air. “Poppycock.”

  Brooklyn smiled at my mom, then aimed that thought-destroying smile my way. “Poppycock, indeed. I’m going to have to start using that word more. It’s totally underutilized.”

  I moved my lips to her ear and whispered, “Half of the word’s been underutilized lately.”

  She didn’t miss a beat. “Yes, poppies really should make up more bouquets. And there are also almond poppy-seed muffins, which are my very favorite muffin.”

  I hooked my hand on her hip and pulled her back against me. “Oh, you want to talk favorite muffins?”

  A grunt escaped me as she elbowed me in the gut.

  Mom raised her eyebrows. “Are you being the gentleman I halfway raised you to be?”

  “No, ma’am,” I said. “But fortunately for me, Brooklyn likes her guys a little rough around the edges.”

  My girlfriend shook her head. “Oh my gosh, your cockiness knows no bounds.” She moved to help my mom grab the dishes out of the cupboard. “I’ve tried to teach him some humility, but it didn’t stick.”

  Mom sighed, nice and loud. “I tried, too, but alas…” Her happy demeanor filled up the room and infected me as well. She loved fussing over me, and worried far too much, despite my repeated assurances that I was good. I could tell she was already seeing visions of Brooklyn and me as a couple, playing house and doing all of the domestic things I never thought I’d do. Mom deserved to be happy, and I’d do whatever it
took to not burst her bubble, even though I feared we’d both be disappointed in the end.

  We piled food onto plates and then sat in the living room to eat. I used to go over to Mom’s place for these dinners, but for a big part of last year she’d hardly left the house, so she insisted on coming over here to help with her “cabin fever.” I think she also wanted to check on me, make sure I had enough groceries and that I was truly doing as well as I told her I was.

  “So, obviously you’ve seen Shane in action,” Mom said.

  Brooklyn nodded and then flashed me a teasing grin. “He was a little rusty at first, but we’ve been getting him in fighting shape.”

  “Oh, good. I was so glad when he landed a position on Team Domination, with the chance to be trained by Blake Roth. I told him over and over that he shouldn’t take a break from his career on my account. I almost didn’t tell him when I got the cancer diagnosis because I feared it would affect his fights, and when I was going through the worst of it, he dropped everything to be there for me.”

  A lump rose in my throat as I thought of those awful days when she’d been so pale, dark circles under her eyes, hair falling out in clumps. I’d taken care of her the best way I’d known how, and the entire time she worried about me, and what I was giving up to help her out, when she’d given up so much just so I’d have a home and a family, even if a non-conventional one.

  Brooklyn’s heavy gaze bored into me, and I was afraid I wouldn’t be able to hold back if I looked at her, but then she squeezed my hand, and I couldn’t not look at her. “I didn’t know,” she said, then returned her attention to my mom. “Are you…?”

  “Cancer-free for four months now. I have to take a pill every day, but I got a boob job out of the deal—something I’m sure Shane would love for me to never mention again—so in the end, it all worked out.”

  How did she always remain so damned optimistic? Her shitty husband was gone more than he was home, their marriage in name only. Instead of sticking by her side through the hard times, he’d left her alone to deal, and the only reason I hadn’t confronted him was that she’d made me promise I wouldn’t. It was damn near impossible to refuse a sick woman’s wish—especially when that woman was my mom—but sometimes I regretted making and keeping it. When you cared about someone, you stuck around, end of story.

  “I’m so looking forward to his first big fight on his way back to the top.” Mom patted my cheek, again with the kid gestures that I secretly loved. “You bet your ass I’ll be as close as I can get to that cage, cheering just as loud as I possibly can.”

  Were those tears gathering in Brooklyn’s eyes? If I wasn’t afraid she’d clock me for it, I might tease her for getting teary over a sappy story. This time I squeezed her hand, and she leaned her head on my shoulder, and all was right with the world.

  “It’s going to be an exciting fight, and I have no doubt he’s going to win,” Brooklyn said. All positive, so I’m not sure why my first thought was wondering why she didn’t tell Mom that she’d be cheering right along with her.

  Chapter Forty-Three

  Brooklyn

  It was too much. I should’ve fled while I had the chance, not dug myself deeper and fallen a little harder for Shane Knox. Like me, he’d given up his dream for a while, for a far more valiant reason than I had, and it was just another reason to not get in his way.

  It was like every time I thought there was a lot at stake, the ante got upped. I couldn’t afford to play this hand, not if it meant standing by and watching people I loved lose everything while I tried to have my career and my fighter, and have sex with him, too.

  And yes, I loved Shane. I’d been tiptoeing around the realization for the past week, telling myself it was too soon. Love didn’t care about logic, though. I’d gone and fallen for a cocky, sexy fighter who could break my heart so easily, the very thing I’d sworn to never do again. The way my heart swelled and my soul turned to liquid fire whenever I was around him made me question if I’d ever truly loved any other guy. Not in this same intense way, I knew that much.

  And if the love was this intense already, and I let it grow even more… I’ll never survive the crash.

  Ever since Liam pointed out everything that was at stake and asked me if I was going to help Shane or hold him back, I’d tried to figure out a way to be with Shane without risking so much. The evidence stacked up quickly, from all the ways I served as a distraction to the fact that it took me two days to reply to the email that offered up one of my dreams on a silver platter.

  If I stayed in this world, fighting would always come first, which meant my stuff would always be last. I couldn’t put off my dreams and watch Shane soar through the ranks until the day he decided he’d outgrown me. Or that the rules didn’t apply to him or “he just slipped and it didn’t mean anything.”

  A tiny voice in the back of my head spoke up, that maybe argument it wanted to make so tempting.

  You’re not the exception to the rule… I wouldn’t turn into my mom, giving chance after chance until she ended up broken; wouldn’t make the same mistakes I’d made in the past. You know it’s going to end badly, and the longer you drag it out, the worse it’s going to be.

  For the past few days I’d worked twelve-hour shifts, slashing the budget to the bare-bones minimum and implementing new software that’d help whoever took over the books at the gym keep better track. It would also generate a report and send it to Liam at the end of the week. That way he could see problems as they arose, not after it was too late to do much about them.

  I’d set up a self-defense class that Liam and Finn were set to teach and put out a call for aerobics instructors who specialized in kickboxing type classes, plus asked the guys at the gym who’d be up for helping with that or doing some personal training. Dad might be too stubborn to follow through, but it was there if they needed it.

  Still, if Shane didn’t win his fight, the gym would drift that much closer to possible foreclosure. Team Domination needed him way more than they needed me, regardless of what magic I could work with the admin stuff.

  “Baby?”

  I jerked out of my thoughts, back to the living room where my perfectly imperfect boyfriend sat talking to the woman who’d taken him in and believed in him when no one else would. “Sorry, what?”

  “We were talking about dessert.”

  “My answer is yes, please.”

  “Is your vote for ice cream or brownies?”

  “I have to choose?” I asked, going overboard with the dramatics to hide my sad thoughts and ensure he and Tammy knew I was kidding. “Are you trying to make me have an emotional breakdown?”

  Shane took my hand and kissed the top of it, and I found myself fighting off tears for the second time that night. “Whatever my baby wants, my baby gets.”

  His eyebrows scrunched together, so clearly I was shit at hiding my sorrow, so I bolted up from the couch. “I’ll help.”

  A few minutes later, Tammy and I ate dessert while Shane allowed himself one bite from my bowl and a handful of almonds. Afterward we used our teamwork skills to tackle the dishes, and then Tammy announced it was time for her to go home.

  “It was so nice meeting you,” I said, and she threw her arms around me and hugged me so tightly that I feared I’d never survive the night without crying.

  Shane put his hand on the small of my back. “I’m going to walk her to her car.” His eyes locked on mine. “Promise me you’ll still be here when I get back.”

  Obviously he knew something was up, and I fought the panicky urge to claim I needed to go, too. But it wasn’t like this would get any easier, and I refused to go the coward’s route. We were adults, so we’d talk like adults. “I’ll be here.”

  He arched an eyebrow, and a little sunshine broke through my cloudy mood.

  “I promise,” I said.

  Satisfied, he gave me a quick kiss, and then I was alone in his apartment, my lungs bound, my rapid pulse pounding through my head.

  My f
eet felt like they weighed a thousand pounds as I made my way to the couch. The seconds fell from the clock one by one, no way to stop them. Our time was always meant to run out, I just thought we’d have a little while longer.

  The door swung open, and the breeze carried in rain-scented air. Droplets speckled Shane’s blue shirt and peppered his face and hair. It reminded me of the first night I’d shown up at his place, drenched and done with fighting the chemistry between us.

  The slam of the door reverberated through the quiet, and then Shane made long, steady strides toward me. My heart beat faster and harder, and then his mouth came down on mine. His hands framed my head as he angled it back to deepen the kiss, his movements tender but sure.

  His fingers circled my wrist and he tugged me to my feet. He drew me flush against him, his hard body a wall of pleasure-fulfilling resistance, his arousal pressing into me and making me want to forget everything I’d decided. No thanks to being an adult as well.

  “Shane…” Each breath only left me shorter on oxygen; every thought drifted farther away before I could catch hold. Summoning every ounce of restraint I had at my disposal, I choked out, “We need to talk.”

  It was one of those lame, cliché sentences that lay waste to relationships, and I wished I’d put it a different way, although it wouldn’t change anything.

  “Later, baby.” Shane rested his forehead on mine and implored me with his green eyes. “Let’s talk later.”

  One second ground out in the air, then two and three. I closed my eyes and dove back in, kissing his lips and giving in to the desire searing its way through my body. We deserved one more time.

  His hands gripped my ass, and as he lifted me into his arms, I wrapped my legs around his waist. Impatient and needy after four days without, I rubbed myself against his gloriously hard length, satisfaction coursing through me at his throaty groan.

  He stumbled into his bedroom and then we fell to the bed, a tangle of groping limbs. He stripped me bare, in every possible way, and after we’d shed our clothes, he crawled over me, his delicious weight pinning me to the mattress. Our eyes locked as we moved together, a perfectly choreographed routine ensuring maximum pleasure. Sweat slicked our bodies, our ragged breaths came faster and faster, and still we dragged it out as long as we could, clinging to the here and now because we both knew things were about to change.