Follow Your Bliss (Bliss Series Book 2)

by Marji Spicer

He pulled her arms away from him. “Honey, you mean a lot to me. More than anyone ever has before. I want more than this. This—us—it means more to me than just sex. I don’t want to get any more involved since this means nothing to you.”

  “That’s not true. You do mean something to me.”

  “I love you,” he said.

  She stiffened. “This is supposed to be about fun. Let’s keep our feelings out of it. Why complicate things?”

  He knew she could be cold, but until that moment, he hadn’t realized how cold. She didn’t feel anything at all for him, and it hurt. “Love is complicating things for you?”

  “I never promised you anything.”

  “You’re right—you didn’t. I’m sorry for ruining your good time. You should have laid out the fucking rules for me. I’m just a dumb ass for assuming you felt the same way for me. I should thank you,” he said.

  “Thank me for what?”

  “For showing me how it feels to get your fucking heart ripped out. I’ll be more careful next time around.”

  Next time around? What did he mean by that? She didn’t want him to find someone else. He would move on. She would remain alone—just like she wanted.

  Denver waited for her to say something. But she just stood there looking at him. “I should be the one with the damn drinking problem.”

  “I don’t have a drinking problem. The only problem I have is you.”

  “I can fix that real fast sweetheart,” he said. “I hope you find what you’re looking for. I did. But I guess I’m not enough for you. Take care of yourself, babe.” Denver never looked back as he walked out of her life.

  Joy was heartbroken. She finally did it; she pushed him away. I've lost him. Tears slid down her face. She went inside and cried herself to sleep.

  Joy felt like she hadn’t slept in weeks. She was making herself sick. She had ruined the best thing to ever happen to her. All over a stupid bottle of alcohol. She didn’t even like the way it made her feel half of the time. Denver had been so upset. Then to top it off, she tried to make light of his feelings. She blew it this time. She wanted to call him and beg him to give her another chance.

  Chapter Forty One

  Joy called Krista. “Things are over between Denver and me. I screwed up in a really bad way.”

  “I’m sure it’s not that bad,” Krista said. “Why don’t you go over to his house tonight and talk to him?”

  “I doubt he’d answer the door. I hurt him. He’ll never forgive me or believe me if I try to explain things.”

  “I doubt that. Why don’t you try?”

  “He’s been home all week, and he hasn’t called or come over. He told me it was over. I could tell by the look on his face he meant it.”

  “At least think about it. It can’t hurt,” Krista said.

  Joy laughed bitterly. “Trust me; I could find a way to make things even worse.”

  “I’ll call you tomorrow and see how you’re doing. Just give it some thought.”

  “Ok, I will,” Joy lied. There was no way she could face him.

  Krista called her the next day. “Let’s go out on Friday night.”

  “Sorry I can’t. I miss Denver so much. It would just be a reminder of how much I screwed everything up.

  “Call him and tell him.”

  “I can’t. I pretty much told Denver our relationship was only about sex. Which it was supposed to be before I stupidly fell for him. I acted like screwing would make our problems go away. He told me he loved me, and I said we should keep our feelings out of it. I dismissed his feelings. How’s that for being cruel? I’m such a bitch. Anyway, he could be seeing someone else already.”

  “I doubt that. I’ve never seen Denver act this way before. He loves you. Mark told me he’s miserable too. I know you guys will end up together. You’re good for each other. You have some things to get past. Mark and I had our problems too. But we worked it out. I know you can get through this.”

  Joy stayed home for almost two weeks. She hadn’t wanted to risk running into Denver. She was going stir-crazy and needed to get out. She was seated at the counter when Denver walked into the diner. Denver hadn’t seen her in almost two weeks. He expected her to get up and leave. She forced herself to finish her coffee. It hurt seeing Denver, but she refused to be a coward. Now she was glad that she had taken the time to dress nicely. She was falling apart inside, but she was trying her darnest to keep it together on the outside. He glanced her way as he sat down. She ignored him.

  Joy waited for him to place his order. As soon as he did, she stood up and walked to the register. Now she could make her escape.She wore a tight, low-cut, purple dress that hugged her curves and showed off her assets. Her breasts were temptingly displayed.

  Denver’s gaze slid over her body. He didn’t like this new look of hers. He rolled his shoulders, trying to release some of the tension building there. His temper started to rise, causing his jaw to tighten. Joy looked like a juicy piece of fruit. She was ripe for the picking. He had no say in how she dressed. She wasn’t his anymore. He needed to get over her. Joy appeared to be doing fine. She hadn’t acknowledged him in any way.

  “Thank you for breakfast, Pearl. It was delicious as always.”

  “You’re welcome, sweetie. It’s always nice to get compliments on my cooking.”

  She ran her hands down the sides of her body. Denver’s eyes followed the path her hands took. He couldn’t stop himself from watching her every move.

  “I love to eat. It shows, doesn’t it?”

  “Nothing wrong with curves, honey,” Pearl said.

  “I’ve got a busy day ahead of me. I better get going.” She still hadn’t looked at Denver.

  “You’re certainly dolled up,” Pearl said.

  “I have plans,” she lied.

  Denver paused as he was about to take a drink of his coffee. Was it a date?

  Joy wanted him to see that she could survive their break-up. She looked at her watch. “I’ll talk to you later. I have to get going.” She walked out of the diner without looking at him.

  “Didn’t she look pretty?” Pearl asked.

  “I didn’t notice,” he said.

  Pearl smiled. To hell, he hadn’t. Denver wouldn’t be clenching his jaw so tightly if he hadn’t noticed her.

  A week later, Joy still complained about missing Denver.

  “He still wants you. Go buy something sexy, get your butt over there and seduce the man,” Krista said.

  “Will you come shopping with me?” Joy asked.

  “Of course, I love to shop.” They drove to a mall two hours away that had a Victoria’s Secret in it. “Look at this.” Krista held up a lacy red demi-cup bra with matching boy shorts. “That ought to short circuit his brain,” she laughed.

  “I don’t know about this,” Joy said while biting her lip.

  “Come on; you can’t chicken out now. What’s the worst that can happen? If he asks you to leave, then leave. This way you’ll know for sure it’s over. Then you can move on.”

  The problem was she didn’t want to move on. What had happened to her independence?

  “I have a feeling it’s over now.”

  “Give it one more shot.”

  “Ok, I’ll do it. But only because I’m a fool who never learns.”

  “He told you that he loved you. You don’t fall out of love that fast.”

  Chapter Forty Two

  Denver told his friend Kurt to stop over for a beer. Maybe some company would take his mind off Joy. He still sat on his balcony at night hoping to catch a glimpse of her. He hadn’t seen her since he’d run into her at the diner. Is she seeing someone else now? He needed to stop obsessing over her.

  They were discussing a job when Kurt choked on his beer.

  “You ok?” he asked.

  Kurt glanced towards the hall. He stood up and sat his half-finished beer down. “I’ll see you tomorrow, boss. I need to get some sleep. You’re a lucky guy.”

  Lucky guy? />
  “That tired, huh? You’re not even going to finish your beer?” Denver laughed. “I didn’t know I worked you that hard.”

  Denver got up and took the beer bottles into the kitchen. It was getting late, and he had to get up early. He might as well go to bed. It was that or sit out on the balcony like a damn stalker watching for a glimpse of Joy. He walked down the hall and stopped short. Joy stood in front of him with a look of shock on her face. She was wearing a lacy red bra and a pair of matching boy shorts. She’d kind of froze when she saw another man looking at her.

  So, this was why Kurt was so choked up.

  “What the fuck is this?” he growled. “I thought your flashing days were over.”

  “I came here to surprise you. How was I to know you were having a friend come over?”

  She turned and started down the hall.

  “Damn you!” He pulled her against his body, backed her against the wall, and kissed her. She could tell he wanted her, if only sexually. God, he’d missed her. “You drive me so fucking crazy.” He pushed her underwear off her. “Why do you do this shit to me?” Denver unzipped his jeans and pushed them down. He was making a big mistake, but he couldn’t stop himself. He had to be inside her now. “I missed you,” she said. He picked her up, and she wrapped her legs around his waist. She was ready for him. “God, baby.” She missed me. He thrust into her and fucked her hard against the wall. It felt so right. They belonged together. He couldn’t hold back. It was over too quick. He shuddered as he came. “Prove to me that this is more than just sex. Marry me.”

  “I…,” she hesitated. Was she ready for that?

  Denver released her, she slid down his body, and he stepped back. He angrily pulled up his jeans. “Why the hell did you come here?”

  “I wanted—,"

  “To fuck—is that it? Sorry I didn’t get you off.”

  Joy stared at the floor, embarrassed that she had come over. “I’m glad you think so highly of me.”

  He had his answer. Things were still just a game to Joy. “Forget, I asked. Just get the fuck out.” He turned and stormed down the hall. He didn’t want to hear the reasons why she didn’t want him or how she didn’t love him. Damn her and her games!

  She’d made a big mistake. Denver had shocked her, and she hesitated too long. She hurried into the bathroom and pulled on her jeans and t-shirt. She forced herself to leave the bathroom and slowly walked to the living room. He sat on the couch with his head in his hands. “Denver…”

  He looked up, and she saw the pain in his eyes.

  “I’m sorry. I should never have come here.”

  “You’re right. How did you get in?”

  “I still have your key.”

  “I want it back.” He held his hand out. “I know you get off on pissing me off. I’m done with your games.”

  Joy pulled his key out of her pocket and dropped it into his hand. A tear slipped down her cheek. “Why are you doing this?”

  “Honey, if all I need is a fuck, I can get one a lot of other places without all the complications.”

  Her back stiffened. “I won’t bother you again.”

  Joy walked out of his life for the final time, berating herself all the way home. She should never have given in to her feelings of desperation. Sex hadn’t solved things before, and now it was even worse. She had wanted to explain, to say yes.

  And, she thought Mike had hurt her. But that pain was nothing compared to hearing what Denver just said. She had no one to blame but herself. She was where she was because of the choices she’d made.

  Denver ran his hand down his face. The last part had been cruel, but he had to make her understand. Damn it! It was all or nothing.

  Joy called Emma after she left Denver’s. “You were right. I should never have hooked up with him,” she cried.

  “What happened?”

  “I let my heart get involved. I fell in love with him. He said he loved me, and I screwed it up. I threw everything away.”

  “I thought he was your prince charming.”

  “I thought he was too,” she whispered.

  “Maybe it’s not over.”

  “Trust me; it’s over. I made an even bigger mess of things by trying to get Denver back. At least I’ll have some great memories. The sex with him was hot and amazing.” She cried even harder into the phone.

  “Aww, honey, I’m so sorry. I wish I would never have suggested you have a fling,” Emma said. “I’m so sorry everything turned out this way. You’ll get through this sweetie. I’ll be here to help you.”

  “Thank you. I know I can count on you,” Joy said. “The best thing to do is to keep my distance from Denver.”

  “Won’t that be hard since he lives across the street?” Emma asked. “If you want him, fight for him.”

  “I already tried. Denver asked me to marry him, and I was so shocked. I didn’t say anything. He took it as a no and told me to leave.”

  “Why don’t you come to visit me. I have some vacation time coming up.”

  “That sounds like what I need.”

  “Let me know when you’re ready, and I’ll take some time off.”

  “I’ll let you know when I’m on my way. I have to take care of some things here first.”

  “Ok, honey, take care.”

  Chapter Forty Three

  Denver was glad he had a job lined up. He needed to think. Everything was so fucked up. Joy had ruined him. He didn’t want anyone but her. They would only destroy each other, though. He thought going to work and pushing himself would help with the pain. But he couldn't stop thinking about her. God, he loved her so much.

  His cell phone rang. He didn’t recognize the number. He took the call. It was just what he needed— another six-week job to keep himself busy. His crew would start bitching soon if he didn’t give them some time off. If he went home, he would sit on his balcony and watch for Joy. The less he saw of her, the better. Maybe in time, he’d get over her. He went to a bar after work with the guys. Women tried to flirt with him. In the past, he would have flirted back, but now it felt wrong.

  Joy originally thought she had eaten something bad. When she didn’t feel better, she blamed their break-up for making her sick. After five weeks, she had to face the facts.

  She bought a pregnancy test. Just as she thought. She was pregnant. It wasn’t how she had planned things to happen.

  Joy thought it might take months of trying. As it turned out, she was wrong. One quick screw, and it happened. She wanted the baby but not like this. How would Denver react? Should she even tell him?

  Joy called Krista. “What am I going to do? I’m pregnant now.”

  “Are you going to have the baby?”

  “Of course, I am. It’s not how I wanted things to happen. When I went to seduce Denver, it worked. Well, the sex part but not getting back together. I screwed that up too. That had to have been when it happened.”

  “You have to tell Denver. He deserves to know. He's going to make a great dad.”

  “Promise me you won't say anything. At least for right now. I need time to figure out what I’m going to do.”

  Denver stopped at the bar on his way home from work. Going back to Bliss just reminded him of what he’d lost. He would end up sitting on his balcony, watching her house like some kind of creep. Why couldn’t he get over her? He’d never had a problem getting over a woman before. Joy haunted his dreams. Why couldn’t she love him?

  Denver walked up to the counter, sat down, and ordered a beer. He hadn’t noticed Joy and Krista when he walked into the bar. Joy watched Denver from her seat. He drank his beer while he watched a baseball game on the TV behind the bar. She didn’t realize it was possible to miss someone so much.

  “You have to tell him about the baby,” Krista said.

  Joy sipped her juice. “I know I do, but how should I tell him?”

  “Walk up to the bar and tell him you need to talk to him. I wouldn’t blurt it out here. Do it privately.”


  “He probably won’t even speak to me.”

  “Go do it. The longer you put it off, the harder it’s going to be.”

  Joy took a deep breath. “Ok, I’m going to do it.”

  “Good, you’ll feel a lot better after you talk to him.”

  “I doubt it. But I’ll be glad once it’s over. I’ve been a nervous wreck for weeks.”

  Joy walked towards the bar. I can do this. What’s the worst that can happen? He gets mad and doesn’t want any part of it. Well, then I’ll do it alone like I’d planned.

  The closer she got to the bar, the more nervous she became. She was dreading this. Her stomach was in knots, and she felt nauseous. How was he going to react? They hadn’t talked or even seen each other in months. She hesitated when she saw a pretty blonde make a beeline for Denver.

  “Denver? Is that you?” the blonde asked.

  When he heard his name, he glanced at the woman. “Susan?” He stood up and gave her a big hug. “Sit down,” he said as he pulled out a barstool. “Damn, how have you been?”

  Joy stopped and turned abruptly. Her face felt like it was on fire. At least he’d been so absorbed in the woman he hadn’t seen her. She felt her heartbreak all over again when he took the woman into his arms. She sat down with tears in her eyes.

  “I’m so sorry,” Krista said.

  “Do you know who she is?”

  “I’ve never seen her before.”

  She’s beautiful and thin. “They obviously know each other. Denver is certainly happy to see her.”

  Chapter Forty Four

  Susan couldn’t believe her good luck in running into Denver. He’d gotten more attractive over the years. It was perfect timing. “How have you been?” she asked. “It’s been what three years now? Are you dating anyone?”

  “No, there was someone, but it’s over.”

  A group of young guys entered the bar and sat down. The noise level spiked when they came in. From the sounds of it, they’d already been drinking for some time. Denver placed his hand on Susan’s back and leaned over so that he could hear her. He glanced up and saw Joy.