Baby Daddies: Puck Buddies Series

by Tara Brown

  Mrs. Banks presses her lips together and nods once. “Yes, jewels might help.” She’s frosty and I want to tell her to stop being such a bitch.

  Nat’s eyes meet mine in the mirror and I wink. She smiles but the expression freezes as she realizes something. She turns and gasps, “No, Mom! They’re not in there!”

  But it’s too late.

  Her mom’s standing at her purse, holding the pregnancy test.

  “What is this? Surely, you’re joking. Is this a shotgun wedding, Natalie?”

  Before I think, I stand and shout, “It’s mine!”

  Her mother’s eyes narrow as she turns to me.

  “Nat was holding it for me. So Lori wouldn’t find it. I wasn’t feeling well, and I got her to grab me a test. It’s positive and I didn’t want to tell him before the wedding. I’m three weeks pregnant.” And rambling.

  “What?” Sami snaps. “Is that a pregnancy test? But you found out at—”

  “Right,” I whisper and walk to the test, taking it from her. “I peed on a new one and asked Nat to hold it. I didn’t want Lori doing this exact thing.” My lies aren’t making sense and I’m contradicting myself. “When I tell him tomorrow I wanted to have the test—” I’m so close to throwing up I can’t breathe. “I’m so sorry. I’ll get rid of it.” I run from the room and down the hall for the bedroom Lori and I are sharing.

  But the wings are so far apart that I don’t hear them before I round the corner to the grand staircase where the guys are all standing.

  Everything moves in slow motion.

  They’re all wearing the same clothes and sexy smiles seeing me.

  Brady adds a cheesy frat boy nod.

  Everyone’s eyes lower to the stick in my hand.

  Matt winces, recognizing it immediately.

  Brady scowls, confused.

  Carson and Rich don’t seem concerned at all. They likely think it’s a vape or something equally stupid.

  Andy cringes.

  Mike’s jaw drops and his eyes land on Lori.

  Lori’s face is the only one I don’t look at. I say nothing, scared of what’s happening.

  Andy’s lifting his hand to pat Lori on the arm when I run by, sprinting in my dress and heels.

  “Jenny?” Lori calls after me but someone else says, “Congratulations, dude!”

  “Congratulations for what?” Carson asks.

  My heart’s racing.

  There’s a cramp in my chest I can’t explain.

  Is it a heart attack?

  I close the bedroom door and lock it, sliding down to the floor and hyperventilating.

  My mind whispers things, traitorous lies like always.

  Maybe Matt will lie and cover for me.

  But the truth of the matter is confirmed a moment later when a quiet knock at the door interrupts my sweaty panic attack.

  “Can you let me in?” Lori speaks through the frame.

  I want to say no but it’s his room in his house. My fingers are shaking, my mouth is dry, and the room is spinning, but eventually I reach the lock and click it. He opens the free door that I’m not leaning on and closes it.

  The guilt and anxiety settles in my stomach, reminding me of the dread I felt when my dad came and told me and Josh that he was marrying Judith.

  The echoey sound of his footsteps on the wood floor matches.

  My breath becomes so loud I’m sure he’ll have to shout to get over it. He reaches down and takes Nat’s pregnancy test. He stares at it, hovering over me.

  “Are you pregnant?”

  I wish he’d asked if it was mine.

  I could have answered that differently.

  But there’s only one answer now. If I lie and then try to tell the truth later it will implode on me. I nod once, stuck staring at the wall as my stomach twists in knots.

  “Is this what you were so upset about the other night at your apartment?” His voice is weird. Detached.

  I nod again. I can’t speak.

  “You were going to leave?”

  Lowering my gaze to the floor is confession enough for him.

  “Oh my God, I’m such an idiot. It’s not my kid, is it? Oh fuck. It’s Ben’s. Of course.”

  I close my eyes and wait for the accusations that I’ve tried to trap him with a baby like a money-grubby whore.

  “This is why you’ve been so distant and pulling away and you were leaving me.” He sighs and walks to me, offering me his hand. “So the stress about your dad’s birthday wasn’t what this was really about?”

  “Lori, we gotta go!” Carson shouts as he knocks on the door, making me jump.

  “Yup,” Lori calls back. “Give me one minute.”

  With trembling fingers, I take his hand to help me stand. He grips me, making me unsure if it’s anger or upset or both.

  When I’m steady on my feet, he lets go and says the worst thing I imagined he would, “Were you going to trick me into thinking it’s mine or were you going to tell me?”

  I flinch but say nothing. The question is legit but also incredibly offensive and cruel. It isn’t the response I was promised. It’s the one I feared.

  All my nightmares are coming true.

  I should have gotten on the plane.

  I’m not in the right head space to deal with his rejection.

  “Holy shit. I can’t do this right now. I’ve got to go. We have to talk about this after.” He moves like he might step closer, but he doesn’t. He opens the door and walks out, carrying Nat’s stick.

  My poor battered heart feels like it might fall out again.

  Desperately needing to be away from this, I spin and rush for my bag to pack.

  Sukii comes running in a moment later. “Are you okay?”

  “I have to go. But you should stay.”

  “No, I’m coming. I told Cap you wouldn’t want to stay if Lori didn’t handle the news well. Was he a dick?”

  “I just want to go,” I say as I grab my toiletries and stuff them into the bag.

  “I’ll get my things and meet you downstairs in five?”

  “Okay.” I do a quick scour of the room, not sure what I’m doing or where I’m going or how I’m getting off this island.

  My fingers shake when I pull my phone from my bag and press my brother’s contact.

  “Hey!” he answers loudly. “Where are you?”

  “Martha’s Vineyard.”

  “You talk to Lori?”

  “Yeah, I need your help.” It’s the hardest sentence to say, but he’s the only person I can ask.

  “What do you need?”

  I close my eyes and whisper as the tears begin to choke me up, “Off this friggin’ island.”

  “Okay, go to the airport on the island and I’ll figure it out.”

  “Thanks.” I tap the phone off before he says anything else. I’m way too close to sobbing and I can’t do that. Not here. Not like this.

  16

  Always be my idiot

  Lori

  The drive to the wedding is a haze.

  The small stick with the two blue lines feels as if it weighs a hundred pounds in my pocket.

  Brady shouts, “You stallion!” and hits me on the arm as we roll up to the resort where he’s getting married.

  I laugh like everything’s fine, and I don’t have a stick my girlfriend pissed on in my pocket. It takes every ounce of strength I have in me to paste on the mask I usually wear for my parents and their friends.

  As the limo stops, Brady gives us all a look. “I love you guys. Thanks for being here today for me.”

  We hug and hit each other and Brady plants juicy kisses on all our cheeks.

  I tell myself to turn off.

  No feelings.

  I’ve faked my way through dozens of events like this one. I can do it again.

  No ruining Nat and Brady’s day.

  I focus hard on that.

  It helps that the wedding venue is perfect. Sandy beach with rolling waves and a bank of seagrass. The oc
ean is so blue that it makes the square four-beam arch of rough wood and silky white cloth pop. The fabric is tied at the bottoms of the posts so it billows in the middle.

  Sami’s lined the top of the arch with bunches of white flowers and the entire base is filled with huge black hurricane lanterns with wide candles lit inside, adding a glow to complement the sunset.

  Matt, Andy, Mike, and I walk to the arch and line up.

  My body is tingling and numb.

  “Congratulations,” Mike whispers.

  “Yeah.” I nod and smile politely.

  My eyes scan the crowd as I search for Jenny. I don’t know what to say to her, but we have to talk. And as angry and terrified as I am, the face she made, visibly devastated, when she came around the corner and we were all there, is killing me.

  But she’s not here.

  Maybe she didn’t come.

  “You know that chat I wanted to have with you tonight after the wedding?” Matt asks in a whisper as the crowd is taking their seats. He doesn’t wait for me to answer. “I wanted to tell you about the baby and warn you that she was going to tell you tomorrow. I had a bad feeling you would mess this up after last night when you said you didn’t want kids. Since I don’t see her, I’m assuming you have blown it.”

  “You knew?” My blood is instantly boiling.

  “Her brother, Josh, phoned and asked me to stop her from leaving you and going back to Canada and taking that job. Sami and I went to the airport and convinced her to give you a chance to do the right thing. That’s why she came back and agreed to come to the wedding.” He sighs, sounding disappointed. “I figured after how you were with Sami, you’d do better than me when you found out.”

  “Well, I didn’t,” I whisper back.

  “There’s only one question you need to ask yourself.” Matt leans in closer so his breath hits my ear. “Pregnant or not, if she leaves and you don’t see her anymore, can you live with that?”

  The answer in my heart is a resounding no but I don’t say anything.

  I don’t have time.

  The music starts, an acoustic of “Make You Feel My Love” with guitars, a girl singing, and ukuleles that ride the wind to us.

  Brady’s and Nat’s moms find their way to their seats with Rich and Carson escorting them.

  Andy’s wife comes down the aisle of white petals the wind is lifting lightly. Her hair lifts and she smiles, trying not to struggle with it.

  Liz comes next. The tiniest of bumps on her stomach is obvious in the dress when the wind presses it against her. She’s glowing. Not normally someone I’d find attractive; she’s a bit meek but as I have often heard people say to girls, pregnancy suits her.

  Bev makes her way along, seeming relaxed and enjoying herself for a second time. I wish I had that same carefree feeling.

  Sami waltzes down the aisle next. She’s magnificent in her dress. They called it jewel-tone blue at the dress shop, but I think it’s sapphire, maybe a touch greener. The color is outstanding against Sami’s tanned skin and silvery blonde hair.

  She winks at us before taking her place.

  Everyone stands and Mr. Banks and Nat begin their walk to us, coming up over the sand dune and grassy hill. Everyone gasps in delight.

  Brady whispers, “Holy fuck.”

  We all nod in unison as the most beautiful girl in the world starts on the petal and sandy path. Her dress is lifting with the wind. If anything, it adds to the remarkable experience of seeing this.

  My heart is seized with fear, and I’m certain I’m about to stroke out any second, but Nat manages to bring a smile to my face. She’s so beautiful when she beams at Brady.

  He swallows a lump and definitely won’t make the ceremony dry eyed.

  She kisses her father in a way only girls like Nat and probably Jenny do. It’s real. They squish in and press skin against each other and it’s authentic love and affection.

  Her dad’s eyes are shiny when he hands Nat to Brady whose fingers are trembling.

  Sami’s already glossy eyed and Brady’s mom is crying happily.

  They take each other’s hands and the ceremony begins.

  The lady minister is warm and welcoming. She has a soothing voice which lies to me that everything will be okay. And I believe her.

  Nat sniffles a bit through her vows which I helped her write.

  Brady’s voice sounds like his balls are in a vice when he calls her Banks.

  “You may kiss your wife,” the minister says.

  Brady and Nat kiss and there is not a dry eye on the beach. My tears stay inside my eyes, burning them.

  “May I introduce Mr. and Mrs. Coldwell.”

  The crowd erupts.

  Petals fill the air like it’s snowing as we walk the lantern-lit path back. For a second time, Bev takes my arm and walks down the aisle.

  “You’re an idiot.”

  “We have to stop meeting like this,” I say.

  “Maybe if you stop being an idiot, we will. Moron.” She sighs but somehow she does it with a smile while waving and nodding as we march all the way to the first photo op. “Lori, when I put Jenny in the cabin next to you, I figured maybe you two could bang it out and you’d have fun.”

  “Well, that worked. Believe me, Bev. So thanks for that.” I don’t bother to sugarcoat the bitterness in my tone.

  “I didn’t think you’d fall for the girl. And I certainly didn’t think she’d fall for your dumb ass. Especially, after we got to know her and realized how amazing she is. She is way out of your league, buddy. But here we are. She’s pregnant with your kid.” Bev steers us because I’ve gone on autopilot.

  I swallow the lump forming in my throat. My kid.

  “I know you’re upset—if Geoff came to me next week and said he was pregnant, I’d be crushed. That’s not the plan. That’s not what I want. But try to step out of your privileged boots and imagine for one second how hard this has been on her and what she’s going through and how you just reacted to a problem you helped create. You left her alone with a mess you made. One hundred percent of pregnancies are caused by men, my dude.” She pats me on the arm as we get to the long grass on top of the sand dune where the setting sun has turned the sky slightly orange, tinting the ocean behind us.

  “You guys ready?” Geoff asks, his smile lingering on Bev.

  She leans in, her whispers touching my cheek, “And just so ya know, that pregnancy test you saw came out of Nat’s purse, not Jenny’s. Nat’s mom found it and lost her damn mind. Jenny saved the day by claiming it, saying Nat was holding it for her.”

  That means I’m carrying the pee stick that belongs to Nat and Brady in my pocket. Knowing that makes it weigh less but feel nastier.

  Overwhelmed, I paste a smile on my face because the alternative is stress pacing, which Nat and Brady don’t want pictures of.

  Pictures last an hour, mostly because Brady’s done, but also because Sami has an oceanic photo shoot in mind for tomorrow after breakfast.

  We eat, they eat, I push food around my plate.

  The toasts at this wedding crush my soul.

  Brady’s father missing the event is a theme and Andy’s speech pushes more rusty tears to my eyes though I fight them back. Brady doesn’t. He cries freely, making the crowd of people love him a little more.

  His mother’s soft and sweet words, spoken with a lack of confidence and experience in public speaking, is a destroyer. We’re all dying until the end when she smiles and says, “We’ve made a decision, if you blow this, BJ, Nat stays in the family and you have to find new relatives.” She winks, fully aware she just said, “blow this BJ.”

  Brady’s dying and nodding, muttering, “Fair, that’s fair.”

  Nat doesn’t drink from her champagne glass. Brady drinks way too much.

  And, eventually, the evening ends with everyone dancing like pagans around fires on the beach to a live band.

  I find a comfortable seat and watch, my mind whirling and counting down the seconds before I ca
n reasonably go home and see Jenny without being the person who ruined my best friend’s wedding.

  Sami finds her way to me, stumbling and crazy. Since having the baby, she hasn’t drank so the effects on her are heavy. She plops down in the chair and points. “I love this. This pauper wedding is way better. Less nonsense! I’m adding that to the blog about it all.”

  “You do seem lighter here.”

  “I am.” She’s breathy. “I feel so free. Ya know?”

  “No.” I laugh bitterly. Freedom is the last thing I feel at this moment.

  “Stop being a bitch, Lori. Go find Jenny and make this better.”

  “I don’t know if I’m ready for a kid, Sami,” I admit the worst part of this. The part I’m ashamed of.

  “Listen to me, no one is ready. You think I was ready when Matt’s dad and brother were dying and he wasn’t speaking to me?” she slurs slightly. “‘Cause I wasn’t. But you were there. And you saved me. So now you go and you save her too.” She points at the ocean as if Jenny’s the Little Mermaid. “Because I know what it’s like to have you on my side, Lori. It’s everything. And with you there, I knew I’d be okay.”

  I don’t say anything. Her words are too big for how drunk she is, but they hit with full effect.

  She reaches over and squeezes my hand. “Gross, why are your hands so sweaty?” She wipes them on my pants. “I’m gonna go dance more. If you’re still here when I get back, you’re dead.” She struggles out of the chair and staggers down the beach to the party.

  Her words mix with Bev’s and Matt’s and start to create a picture in my head.

  A terrible realization hammers at me. Since I saw the pregnancy test, I’ve felt like the victim of this. But the truth is we all learned how it works in grade school. Sex leads to kids. We did this. I’m no victim. And I’m also not a coward. But I left the girl I love alone and accused her of trying to trick me. Jesus, she must hate me. She’ll never forgive me for this. And I’ve realized I need her too. I need to buck up and pretend I’m completely fine with this baby, be strong for her. The same way I was with Sami.

  I jump from the chair and sprint for the limo, not waiting for the drivers. I take one with keys in it, not even sure it’s one of mine, and race home the short distance along the winding road to the house.