Penny Legend

by Lucy English

  “Toryn works at the district attorney’s office,” I said, hoping to redirect him before anyone saw his face. “He also knows the public defenders in the county and he did some research for us.”

  “You swore you wouldn’t tell!”

  “I swore I’d do my best to help you and I think you should hear Toryn out because he’s our best bet for knowing what the hell to do!” I was snappish. It was the instant coffee. Like bad crack.

  Desiree was taken aback by my tone. I pride myself on staying even-keeled in professional matters, but three sips of that coffee, hunger, and sleep deprivation were not my friends.

  Toryn smiled a charming smile and put on a bit of gay affect. Very disarming. “I’m really not here to interfere,” he began, “and I appreciate your hospitality, Aunt Granny.” He’d kept the only spoon and was stirring his coffee enthusiastically rather than drinking it. “I do know who the best public defenders are and I’ve done some research on how sentencing occurs in these situations.”

  “You mean murders?” Desiree asked.

  “Well, let’s not call it that. The best term we can use is self-defense.” Toryn was warming up to the subject. He was armed with information and ready to help. It occurred to me that if anything could win Desiree over it was Toryn. “Justifiable homicide is what I think we’ll want the public defender to go for. That’s when you kill someone to prevent greater harm to innocents.”

  “That’s what I did,” Desiree said and shifted in her chair. She pushed her coffee toward the center of the table and leaned in a little toward Toryn.

  He took the encouragement. “I’m not going to ask you what happened. I’m only going to tell you some things that might have happened that would be good things to have happened to show that it was justifiable homicide. When you talk to the defender, you can tell him or her what happened, okay?”

  “Okay.” She nodded and blinked the bat-wing eyelashes.

  “It is lawful for a citizen to repel violence with violence to protect his or her own or another’s life and limb, or to prevent sexual assault. A non-criminal homicide ruling, usually committed in self-defense or in defense of another, exists under United States law. A homicide may be considered justified if it is done to prevent a very serious crime, such as rape, armed robbery, manslaughter, or murder. The victim must reasonably believe that the assailant intended to commit a serious crime.”

  Sharma Lou, Desiree, and I watched in silence as Toryn recited what he’d learned.

  “So you have to have believed that you were in the way of serious harm, or that someone else was. You have to have done whatever you could to get out of the situation, or get the other person out of the situation, which is the ‘duty to retreat.’ It’s easiest to avoid the duty to retreat if you’re in your own home, because where would you go? If you were out on the street, then you would probably need to show that you tried to retreat but were pursued and could not.”

  Toryn stirred his coffee. Tink tink tink. He looked at each of our rapt faces and smiled. This was an extrovert—energized by others rather than exhausted by us. He continued.

  “The defense should not be out of proportion to the crime. So that means if you use a gun and he’s unarmed, well, it’s awkward. But if the potential crime was really bad, then it would still work. These things aren’t cut-and-dried, you know.”

  “Uh-huh,” Desiree said. Her gaze was fixed on him. Sharma Lou was looking back and forth between Toryn and Desiree, her coffee long gone.

  I looked down at my coffee and forced myself to take a sip.

  “The Castle Doctrine,” Toryn continued, “allows you to protect your home. So to the degree that you were doing that, it’s helpful. Given that James was shot on the street, it’s a bit tougher, but if you believed he was threatening you in your home and threatening Legend in your home, that would be helpful. Have I given my disclaimer that I’m not a lawyer and this is my interpretation and subject to imperfection? Well, now I have, but I’m right, so let me continue.”

  He was manic. I looked at his coffee. All there. He was pulling all this energy from the universe without even having the help of the amphetamines-disguised-as-coffee.

  I was hungry. Very hungry. I wanted him to wrap it up.

  “So we have some complication of circumstances here, and of course I can’t speak to specifics since I don’t know, but let’s just say that James was advancing on Legend to do harm. It would be best if you had some way to show a history of harm, and the graze wound was a result of you firing on James as he approached Legend. Just saying.”

  I was uncomfortable from instant coffee, hunger, and well, uncertainty about the ethics of all this. But I was sort of okay if Desiree really was just defending herself and Legend, and she needed to understand the most important points in her story. Part of me wished she’d tell us the whole true story, but I guessed she didn’t trust us quite enough.

  “To summarize,” Toryn said, but my phone rang and interrupted. It was sitting on the table and everyone saw the incoming call.

  Conner.

  I sent him to voicemail as quickly as I could.

  “You teamin’ up with the narc tryin’ to put me away!” Desiree yelled.

  “I’m not! I’m trying to get him to back off so we can solve this!”

  “Why should I believe that?” she demanded.

  A text came in and I held it so nobody could see.

  Conner: Tasha ran. Call me.

  “Because he’s not here?” I said, the coffee-induced irritation showing. “Because I haven’t told him you killed James?” I stood up. “Because I dragged my best friend and drove all the way here in the middle of the night and I won’t even get back in time for work with no sleep and I’m on probation and will probably get fired? Pick your reason! Maybe it’s just because I care about Legend and I don’t want him abandoned in a foster home. Huh? Do you think that could be it? Because right now it isn’t because I just adore you so much!”

  They were all looking up at me with their mouths hanging open. I grabbed my bag and pulled some cash out of my wallet. I tossed four twenties on the table.

  “This is all the cash I have. I’m sorry it’s not more. I don’t know what’s the best thing for you, and I’m not going to pretend to. So if money is making you feel forced into something, well, I’m trying to say I wish that wasn’t the case, and this is a tiny bit I can do to support your best decision, whatever it is. I do know it’s best for Legend to have a stable loving parent and I believe you are that. Toryn’s given you the facts to consider. You can think about what happened and how it fits with your ideal defense. You can also think about Tasha, who is innocent, if obnoxious and chromatically freakish, going to prison for a crime you committed. We’re going home.”

  “What?” she said, standing.

  “The cops are going after Tasha,” I said. “She’s gonna get charged for a murder you committed. Do you really want that to happen?”

  “That bitch is my arch-est enemy!” she yelled.

  “Well, I think she might have realized they’re after her because she ran,” I said. “Where would she go?”

  “Hell if I know! That slut’s no doubt welcome in the home of a lot of skanky men!”

  “Would you stand by while she goes to prison for you?”

  “She wouldn’t go to prison for me.”

  “Okay, because of you.”

  She stilled, silent. One of her eyelashes was giving her trouble and she fiddled with it.

  “She’s a little stressed,” Toryn said, “but only because she really cares. I think you’ll see that when you take some time.”

  Toryn thanked Sharma Lou for the coffee and I did too.

  “Please come home,” I said to Desiree in parting. “Legend needs you, and you have people on your side.”

  CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

  I returned Conner’s call as soon as we pulled out of the driveway. It was four in the morning.

  “Where are you?” he answered.

>   “On my way home. I was out with Toryn,” I said.

  “Did you listen to my voicemail?” he asked.

  “No.” I was too tired to apologize. “But I saw your text.”

  “Tasha took off.”

  “I got that.”

  “Where would she go?”

  “I have no idea! Why are you asking me? I thought you had her under surveillance!”

  “We did, but we ran out of budget and we had what we need to bring her in. We took the tail off her and next thing you know she split.”

  “How much evidence do you have?”

  “Enough to charge her.”

  “Enough to convict her?”

  “I don’t know. There are a lot of variables there.”

  We were barely out of town and I wanted to decompress and rest a little so I could offer to drive. Toryn would probably take the day off, but I needed to go in to work.

  “Can we talk about this in the morning? I mean, at a more reasonable hour in the morning?”

  “Talk to your contacts. Find out where she may have gone.”

  “It’s four in the morning. I’m not talking to anyone.”

  “You’re talking to me! What are you and Toryn doing out so late anyway?”

  “Long story. I’ve gotta go. I’ll talk to you tomorrow—I mean today.”

  I disconnected and let my head fall back against the headrest.

  Toryn drove.

  I don’t remember much about getting home other than that I was late for work. I called in sick because there was just no way I could pull it off. I sounded so bad when I talked to Lynnie that I wasn’t worried that she would doubt my deathbed status.

  I closed the blinds in my room, stripped, and hit the bed.

  I got a few hours’ sleep and woke up thinking about Legend. I wanted to see him. I called Maggie and asked if it would be okay if I picked him up from school and took him for ice cream or something. She was fine with that, so I showered and at three I headed to his school. The summer was so hot and the school year, which normally goes into mid-June in Boston, was extended due to a lot of snow days the previous winter.

  He looked happy to see me.

  “I saw your Aunt Desiree last night. She went to visit Sharma Lou. Do you know her? Desiree calls her Aunt Granny?”

  Legend nodded and smiled a crooked smile, and I knew he knew her.

  “Well, I’m sure she’ll be back soon, but she said she wanted me to take you out to ice cream for her and tell you she loves you.”

  He cocked his head. Maybe I was laying it on too thick but I didn’t care.

  “Really! She said to get you a double scoop or a sundae or whatever you want!”

  We were walking from his school to the ice cream shop. Legend looked to the sky and put his hand out as if to feel rain. The sky was mostly clear but I knew then that rain was coming.

  “Do we have a little while before the rain?”

  He smiled and nodded. He tapped his wrist.

  “Okay, well, we won’t waste time but if we get wet we get wet!”

  I was encouraged that he was using so much nonverbal communication. He was doing a lot more to interact than he had a week before. Having the truth out about who shot James must have been a relief.

  “Things going okay at Maggie’s?”

  He shrugged but smiled and nodded.

  “Do you like the other boys there?”

  He nodded again.

  We arrived at the ice cream shop and I asked if he wanted peanut butter cup. He did. So did I.

  He got a cone, I got a cup. We sat. I told him about the invention of the rotating ice cream cone. He smiled and tried to turn his cone at a steady pace like a machine might do.

  “Is it too much work?” I asked. “Do you need a battery-powered one?”

  He smiled wryly and nodded, then frowned like he was burdened by his manual cone.

  I was dying to know what he’d be like if he talked. He was clearly smart and engaged and sensitive. He had a sense of humor and was an astute observer. I wondered if he’d been as great an observer before his silence, or whether the silence had contributed.

  My plan was go to back to bed after I walked Legend home, but Conner had other ideas. He was waiting outside my apartment.

  “Come on in,” I said, trying to sound more annoyed than happy to see him. Why should I be happy to see him? He was the enemy. Well, not exactly the enemy, but doing some enemy things for lack of accurate information which I could supply him but wouldn’t.

  He looked tired and rumpled and darling. We were both a little wet from the rain. He flopped on my couch and I flopped next to him. We stared at each other for a while, then he shifted, reached for me, and we were kissing. As the kiss become more passionate I tried to scramble in my mind to figure out what I wanted from him. A good friend once taught me about the right time to get what you want from a man, and we were on our way there.

  I pulled back and looked at him. Vacant signs hung in his eyes and I knew that desire had taken over.

  “Can you leave the Tasha thing alone for a while?” I asked.

  “No,” he answered and pulled me in closer.

  I ran my hands across his chest, shoulders, and down his arms. I was losing my train of thought.

  “Maybe the whole story isn’t out yet,” I said when we pulled our mouths apart to breathe.

  “I came to talk about that,” he said, and kissed me some more. He tightened his grip around my back, lifted me a little, and laid me on my back on the couch. He found his position on top of me.

  I tried to think but failed. I was tired and confused and filled with lust. A feminist in my head said he was taking advantage but I banished her. He wasn’t. I wanted him and I was reveling in his strong attention. He pulled my shirt up, then off, pausing to admire my breasts before kissing me again. If I’d known this was gonna happen I would have worn a sexier bra. But I forgot that quickly and pulled his T-shirt up so I could feel his skin on mine. He sat up and shed the shirt. He looked at me again and reached for my zipper. Then he thought better of it and stood up. He leaned over and scooped me from the couch and carried me to my bed.

  I woke to voices. Conner and Gloria in the kitchen. Shit.

  I got up and washed my face. I wet my hands and tried to get my hair to calm down.

  Useless.

  I smelled coffee and gave up on my appearance but I did brush my teeth before heading out. What I’d learned about Conner the night before was enough to encourage me to put in a little effort.

  Conner was at the breakfast bar and Gloria was fawning. Gloria would never steal a boyfriend from me, but she would position herself in case things didn’t work out. And she would enjoy the handsome guy at the breakfast bar when available.

  When I came out Gloria went to shower for work. I poured some coffee and sat on the other stool. Conner reached for my hand, then let go, scooched his stool closer, and put his arm around my waist. He gave me a long, sweet good morning kiss.

  The coffee helped—or maybe it hurt—because when my brain fog cleared I realized that I still had a huge problem on my hands and I was now literally in bed with the enemy.

  Conner broke into my thoughts. “So why were you in Hartown, Pennsylvania?”

  I stiffened. “How did you know that?”

  “Tracker in your bag. Remember?”

  “Oh. Um. Toryn and I went to see Aunt Granny.” I stood and went into the kitchen. I opened the freezer and rummaged for bagels. I found them too soon. A few breaths later I realized I couldn’t keep my head in the freezer all day. I took the bagels to the counter, pulled one out of the bag, and started prying at the split with a knife.

  “Whose aunt—uh, or granny, is she?”

  “Oh, people just call her that, you know. Her name is Sharma Lou. Isn’t that an interesting name?”

  “Uh-huh. But you didn’t really answer my question. Why did you go see some Granny Lou in Hartown, Pennsylvania, in the middle of the night?”

/>   “We were trying figure out what support system Desiree and Legend have to get back on their feet.”

  “In the middle of the night.” It wasn’t a question. He knew exactly when I was there.

  “I didn’t want to miss work. But now I missed it anyway so I have to be on time today. Wow. Yeah. I need to jump in the shower!”

  I hopped up from the stool, kissed him on the cheek, and headed to my room to grab clothes. He followed me.

  “You need to tell me.”

  “Okay, but maybe it can wait? There’s nothing urgent.”

  “I don’t believe you drove all night to Hartown, Pennsylvania, and came back the same night over nothing urgent.”

  I sat on my bed and took a couple of deep breaths, looking at him. I told myself he was my friend, a good person. How could I get us on the same side? I believed we both wanted the best outcome for everyone. “I don’t know what to say right now. You can’t tell me everything about your work, and I can’t tell you everything about mine. I have confidentiality requirements too.”

  I was looking in his eyes and I saw him soften.

  “Okay,” he said. “For now. But if there’s something important, you need to tell me.”

  “We both want this solved and everyone safe.” I got up, kissed him, and started for the bathroom.

  He grabbed my arm and turned me toward him. “This isn’t how this morning should have gone. I had such a great time last night and I really, really like you.” He took my face between his hands and kissed me, taking his time and melting the tight spot in my tummy.

  When he pulled back I said, “I really, really like you too.” I put my head on his shoulder and we stood in a hug for a few beats.

  “I’m gonna go get ready for work, baby,” he said. “I’ll check in with you later, okay?”

  “Okay.” My brain had slowed with the kiss. I hoped the shower would bring it back online so I could come up with a plan, but instead I tortured myself with questions about Conner. He’d been simultaneously sensual and almost coldly interrogatory. Every time I thought I was starting to really know him, I realized I didn’t.