Stained Minds

by Helen Scott

  “You never thought to turn her?” Cade inquired, sounding oddly thoughtful for my more brutish mate.

  “Of course we thought to turn her.” Drake snorted.

  “She never wanted to be turned,” Alexander ground out, his face taut with emotion.

  Well, that shut us all up, didn’t it?

  “Does she know who she is?” I asked tentatively.

  “Not at first no, it takes a while and some magic to bring the memories of her past lives back. Some of which I wish we could spare her from, but it’s an all-or-nothing kind of thing.” Jasper sighed before draining the last of his mimosa.

  “Do you need our help?” The question was out of my mouth before I could process it or wonder if they would take offense to it.

  A round of chuckles went up, and though their amusement riled me, before I could get too angry, Rhys replied, “Honest and caring, so rare in our world. You’ve got yourself a diamond in this one, Darius.”

  “I know,” the Enforcer said smoothly, as his eyes caught mine and his gaze heated. I felt my Vampire respond to her mate’s need and struggled to keep myself in check.

  “You need to complete your bond before your pursangs do it for you,” Alexander stated. His tone was bland and his face was as blank as it could possibly be, so I knew he was trying to tell us without offending us, but at the same time, my Vampire was enraged. I was fighting so hard to stay in my seat that I couldn’t prevent the way my teeth were bared at him. Darius could barely control himself either, lunging out of his seat and barely catching himself before he reached Alexander.

  “My brother is being truthful. This rage, this uncontrollable behavior, it will only get worse the longer you deny finalizing the bond. We have seen it before.” Drake finished his mimosa as he looked me square in the eye, as though he knew I was the one holding back.

  “We have seen two pursangs tear each other apart because they waited so long to finalize their bonding, that they had driven their Vampires insane with need. That is not something we wish to see happen to one so promising, or to you, Darius,” Rhys explained, his tone lightening at the end as he tried to turn it into a joke.

  The truth was there though, I could sense it as clearly as I could sense my mates through our bonds.

  And now Gideon was awake, his health restored, there was nothing stopping me from claiming Darius as my own.

  My pursang was ready, but was I? That was the only question.

  Barclay

  The soft tinkle of laughter had me jerking in place. I peered at Marcella, but she wasn’t laughing, she was frowning, and this sound? It was definitely female.

  There was another female on the premises, but she was locked underground in the basement—probably time we did something with the prisoners, to be fair. They stank in a way that went beyond my sensitive olfactory senses, and that never boded well for survival rates.

  But Elizabeth wasn’t laughing. And if she wasn’t, and neither was Marcella…

  I frowned as I tried to figure out where the laughter came from, and then it sounded again, and I realized it was internal.

  Yep, I knew that sounded fucking crazy. I also knew I wasn’t nuts. I might have been stuck in my wolf form, but I wasn’t losing my mind here.

  I also knew that most crazy people shouted their lack of craziness to the world at large, but I wasn’t. Seriously. But this laughter? I could hear it as though Marcella was chuckling at a joke, but it was as intrinsic to me as the wolf. Like my wolf could hear it even if I couldn’t—

  There you go, little wolf.

  I frowned. Okay, so I frowned inwardly. Wolves don’t really possess the correct facial muscles for that—my eyebrows stuck where they were unless I was snarling.

  Little wolf? I retorted, more pissed by that than the fact some chick was talking to me telepathically. #priorities

  To me, you are indeed little. Not the youngest of my kind, but one of the most important.

  A scowl. Inwardly, yes. What are you talking about? Who the hell are you?

  I sleep until the world trembles beneath my feet. Or begins to.

  Tension filled me. There’s an earthquake coming? Did Las Vegas even have quakes? Fuck, I wasn’t a walking talking Wikipedia app.

  No, child. Another gentle tinkle of laughter. The sound was a cacophony that made my body hum in response. It was beautiful, one of the most beautiful things I’ve ever heard. Thank you. More amusement.

  And what the fuck?

  She’d known what I was thinking even if we weren’t talking?

  I’d have looked around, but it would have been too meme-worthy to live. Who are you?

  My name has died out, but once, the old world quivered at its mention. A sigh, like the dusting of raindrops down my back. Morgause. I am a sister to Arthur, and I am the Mother of your kind.

  Say what? It was a true derp moment, but what. The. Fuck?

  Starting to readjust the whole ‘I’m not crazy’ thing, I began to move toward my mate. She was a whole buttheap of crazy going down in one sexy package, so maybe she’d immunize me or something.

  A snort sounded in my head, and it made my ears turn this way and that as I processed it. Any and all sounds could trigger a physical response. A cringe when you heard nails down a chalkboard. A smile at the gentle twang of an acoustic guitar. But I’d never responded in this way before. My responses were bone deep.

  You are not crazy, and there is no immunization to craziness. Although they did try with those lobotomies. A disapproving grunt. Humans truly are too stupid to live sometimes.

  If I’d had lips to curve, they’d have curved. They are young.

  No, they are not, she retorted. They are ancient, and yet they are toddlers still. That makes them fools.

  I wasn’t sure why, but a Mark Twain quote popped into my head. We learn from history that we learn nothing from history.

  A purring sound had my fur sticking up on edge. Exactly. Not just a wolf, but a clever one at that.

  When you say Arthur’s sister, you don’t mean like— Shit, what was I asking? If I’d had opposable thumbs, I’d have dug them into my eyes to rub them. I mean, the most I know about Arthur is that Dudley Moore played him back in the, what, seventies? And also, that I preferred Charlie Hunnam playing him to Clive Owen—

  I was a fan of Charlie’s too. The story was all wrong, of course. All wrong. A sigh. But that was how we wished it. No one was to know the truth, and that we managed.

  What truth? I gulped. And why are you telling me?

  Because I am Awakening and you are my child.

  I have no parents—

  Speak not of those who birthed you. The tone was like a crack of a whip in my head, one that had me jolting in place. They are as foolhardy as the humans. We have seen what happens at institutes such as Westbrook and Eastbrook, and We. Do. Not. Approve.

  The words were like the aforementioned nails down a chalkboard. They had me cringing. Had everything inside me shuddering with acute pain. Her displeasure, her anger, was a visceral thing.

  Apologies, child, were the next purred words. You are a sensitive one, but that makes sense. Do you know how long it has been since I’ve spoken to one of my children? And you, but a half-blood. So strong. A hum.

  Who are you? You may be Morgause, and you may be—Gulp—King Arthur’s sister, but…

  You are asking what I have already answered. A sigh. I am Morgause, Mother of the Shifters. My brother is Arthur, Father of the Walkers. I am kin to two further sisters. Morgana, Mother of the Pursangs, and Elayne, Mother of the Druids—

  How have I never heard any of this before? I demanded, my suspicion at an all-time high.

  Because we willed it so, of course. Now, however, there are stirrings, and I am in need of your aid.

  Aid? How—

  Worry not, little one. I will be in touch. I apologize for holding you hostage, but until I was Awakened, I didn’t have the ability to speak with you in your human skin.

  You’re the re
ason I’m still a wolf?

  You’re slow on the uptake for one so smart, aren’t you? Another laugh, and had I been in my skin, I’d have blushed. Worry not. The time for fear approaches, but you are still safe. Ensure your brotherhood is united, and say hello to Rhys for me. Tell him he fills out a pair of jeans better than he does a suit of armor…

  Before I could say another goddamn word, a sharp jolt of pain whirled inside me. It was like sticking a firework in an open wound. The agony blistered inside before tearing me up, ripping me out of this form with a distressed howl, and shoving me into my skin.

  My body jerked as I landed flat on my back. My spine arching as someone other than myself controlled a response as natural to me as breathing. The pain was still there, and I released a scream as my nerves responded to another’s touch, another’s forcing of the shift.

  I knew my brotherhood scattered around me, felt Marcella’s touch as my body reverted from one form to another, but even that was of little comfort.

  “Why does he keep shifting back and forth?” was Marcella’s cry.

  What? I was shifting back and forth? How did I not know that? Was that why it hurt so fucking much?

  I released another scream, and it sounded like a howl. I was wolf again. Then, I felt a hand, a ghostly one, caress my brow. Relax, little one, relax. Do not fight me. It will only cause you pain. So strong for one so young.

  I didn’t have much choice but to relax.

  Morgause, or whoever the fuck she was, made my muscles turn to jelly and even as I felt like I could puddle into a big vat of goo, I felt the agony disappear, and when I stared up into my mate’s concerned features, I released a sigh—she was in color. Full color. No gray or sepia.

  “What is it, Barc?”

  Someone behind her snickered. “Barc? Seriously?” I knew it was one of the newcomers, so I took no offense.

  I grunted. “My parents—” I paused. “Sires, must have been having a joke the day they named me.”

  Marcella’s hand stilled its gentle caress on my shoulder. She squeezed me gently, and her gem-like eyes glittered with concern as she asked, “Barclay, are you okay?”

  Gulping, I shrugged. “I don’t know what the fuck just happened.”

  “I’ve never seen you do that before.” Gideon.

  I sighed. “Maker, it’s good to see you up and about, bro.”

  Gideon grinned, but his face was strained with worry. For me. Fuck, I loved this dude. The feelings were so much more when I was in this form.

  I always forgot how narrowly the wolf viewed the world. To the beast, these people were my pack. I’d kill for them. Die for them. Would do anything for them, but love? It was strange. It was a mixture of loyalty and a need to stalk. To protect. A wolf loved, but not like a human did.

  He reached forward and grabbed my hand, hauling me into a sitting position, I slouched over and tried not to feel the way my nerves were spitting and hissing at whatever Morgause had done to me. My body truly didn’t appreciate it.

  Another grunt as my bones resettled in the sand, and I peered over at the newcomers who hadn’t moved from their earlier positions—pre-Morgause’s mind fuck conversation with me.

  They were seated under the pergola, slouched back watching me as though I was better than a series on TV.

  Darius was the only one not crouched at my side, but he stood watching me, close, protective.

  When had that happened?

  When had we gone from being a brotherhood with a Sixth plus one to just being a brotherhood?

  I swallowed, and the two halves of my soul whispered in delight—Pack.

  Yes. The wolf had called it mere moments ago, but now the human accepted it.

  We were more than just a brotherhood, connected through our Alpha female. We were Pack.

  Reaching up, I ran my fingers through my hair. The minute I did, I scented myself and grimaced. “Need a shower.”

  “Wasn’t about to say anything, dude, but yeah, you stink like wet dog.”

  I flipped Cade the bird, but grinned his way. “Fuck off.”

  Raven slipped into my mind. You truly okay?

  His presence in my head felt natural, right. Morgause’s? Not so much.

  I didn’t answer him mentally, because this wasn’t something I needed to keep bottled up. Morgause had contacted me for a reason…

  “Rhys?” I shot the Cavalry member a look. “Why would Morgause tell me to pass on her appreciation of your ass in jeans rather than a suit of armor?”

  The look of cool disdain on the Ancient’s face was washed away by starkness. His features tensed, the coves and angles of his face standing out in stark relief under the brightness of the sun. “Morgause?” he whispered, his voice a rasp.

  At his side, his brothers shifted into a stillness that could only be considered preternatural.

  I nodded, then reached up and tapped my temple. “She and I just had a little chat.” I blew out a breath. “I’d think I was going crazy, but she was the one who kept me in wolf form.”

  “She Awakens.” It was a statement, not a question, from Drake, the bringer of mimosas and fuck, I needed something that wasn’t water but not the bubbly orange juice.

  Bleugh.

  Where was an IPA when you needed it?

  The Ancients shot each other glances that told me they were communicating telepathically, which was all well and good but, “Speak aloud,” I growled out, my muscles no longer like Play-Doh as my body came back on board. “She came to me for a reason. Keeping us out of the loop is beyond stupid.”

  “The question is why she came to you,” Jasper retorted, stacking his elbows on his knees and dropping his fists between the space he made with his thighs.

  “She said I’m important.” And having always been considered the antithesis of vital in the scheme of things—be it a belief imbued by my sires or by the masters at Eastbrook—it was a novel feeling.

  “You must be if she speaks to you,” Alexander mused.

  “Who the hell is Morgause?” Marcella ground out between clenched teeth. I could sense her jealousy sweeping over her like a red wave. The bond, Morgause was correct, needed to be set in stone.

  “You are unsettled, Mate,” I told her in a whisper. “No more waiting.”

  “Who is she?” she spat, not processing my words, only what I wasn’t saying.

  “She is someone who has been dead for a good three thousand years—”

  “Not dead, Darius, Sleeping. With a capital ‘S,’” Rhys corrected. “But if what the pup says is true, and is she is Awakening…” He released an irritated hiss. “This does not bode well for my trip to the Seychelles.”

  Chapter Six

  Marcella

  When Barclay had shifted back to human for the first time in over a week, and had almost immediately begun talking about another woman, my jealousy ran out of control. I felt split in two. One side just happy he was human and not locked in his wolf form for the rest of his life, while the other side felt unworthy of this group of men if they were all as important as Barclay. Morgause certainly seemed to see the same strength and value that I did in Barclay, which I supposed was a good thing.

  I wasn’t sure where we were supposed to go from here. I mean, we had barely been handling this drug issue that Darius had wanted us to work on, and now mythical beings were waking up, and the members of the Cavalry that were present had wandered off to have private discussions about what Morgause’s message could mean.

  My eyes traveled from one to the other of my brotherhood, and yes, I included Darius in that statement now. I was so happy that they were all back with me and mostly healthy, although I was still worried about how much Cade was sleeping.

  The group had slowly dispersed, each of us lost in our own thoughts as the Ancients decided how much to share with us. Yeah, that was irritating, but of us all, Darius was the calmest. Maybe because he understood more of the situation, or maybe because he knew the importance of sharing only so much information
with the masses.

  With them out of the way and us simply waiting for the scraps of info they deigned to present us with, Barclay had gone to shower, and Cade was napping on one of the loungers, while Gid, Rav, and Keir were cooking something up in the kitchen that smelled amazing. The only one still sitting with me was Darius. His dark eyes were watching me, I could feel them dancing over my skin, but I didn’t want to meet them, didn’t want to be caught in the swirling depths of the mate bond.

  I didn’t know why I was resisting it so much. Maybe part of me was scared that it would end up being like my mother and father’s? Or maybe it was because it was so unexpected? I wasn’t sure. Either way, I knew we needed to finalize the bond, I just hated that everyone was telling us what to do when it wasn’t like we could get down and dirty in the pool, was it?

  There was a meeting of Ancients going on behind us, and down in the basement, we had prisoners we’d been torturing just lolling around. Gideon had almost died, Cade was still ill, and Barclay had had a fucking conversation with some bitch called Morgause!

  Yeah, this was the perfect time for a fuck-a-thon.

  “You know we don’t have to do anything we don’t want to, right?” Darius’s smooth, silky voice drifted into my angry thoughts.

  I looked up at him and saw the intensity in his eyes, which made my heart thud in response. My body echoed his own need, which shone in the depths of his eyes, but I knew once this bond was sealed nothing in my life would ever be the same. I mean, hell, look at what had happened to my power with the original brotherhood. Darius wasn’t just my Vampire’s mate, he was the true final member of the brotherhood as well, something which I was only just realizing as I got them all back and conscious again.

  “I know,” I answered quietly, pausing and trying to put my emotions into words. Instead of continuing though, my mouth just hung open, the words all stuck in my throat in a jumbled mess.