Granted by the Beast: A Steamy Paranormal Romance Spin on Beauty and the Beast (Conduit Series Book 4)

by Rebecca Hamilton

  A rush of guilt ran through me when I saw how tortured he was, putting me in this position. In my heart, I knew Ramsey was just trying to do this for the benefit of all of us. Finding the genie and figuring this out meant finding a way to save Huntsman. Saving Huntsman apparently also might mean finding a way to save the world, and that was more important than my momentarily discomfort.

  I hung my head in my hands, unsure of what to say or do. Things had gotten so complicated. So hard. I had already given so much of myself in the last few months. Part of my soul that I would never be able to get back. The idea that I was going to have to give more—that even after doing it, all of this might still fail spectacularly—weighed on my mind.

  That wasn’t the only thing weighing on my mind, though. Satina’s words were playing on repeat in my brain, digging into me like the pointed edge of a rusty fork. She told me there was a traitor in the group, among my most trusted allies and friends.

  The very notion was setting my teeth on edge and giving me a migraine the size of which I’d never experienced before. It was making me doubt—not only the people around me, but myself and my abilities as well. Doubt, that I knew for an absolute fact, would be all of our downfall.

  A traiter that had wormed their way into my inner circle, with the people I was closest to, that meant I was blind. I allowed it to happen. I let them in.

  What kind of idiot would do that? What kind of person would let her guard down that much?

  I let the doubt eat away at me, because I was that stupid. I let someone into my circle, and they were standing in front of me, no doubt thinking they had the upper hand. And I had no way of knowing who it was. Obviously, I wasn’t capable of saving the world. That was about the only thing that I was sure of.

  “Can we just stop for a minute?” I asked, forcing myself to take a deep breath, turning on my heels, and heading back to the living room before I broke down completely. Ramsey’s footsteps followed. “You know I didn’t mean that I don’t trust you or that I don’t know you,” I said, plopping myself on the couch. “But this is a lot. You expect me to go in there, strip naked, watch him strip naked, and then hold hands as we tell each other our feelings. You have to understand how hard that’s going to be for me. How easy it’s going to be for me to slip back into thinking that the man with me belongs to me.”

  I started to get choked up, so I stopped talking. Instead, I focused on my fingers, twining them together and trying not to show how frustrated and nervous I was about the whole situation.

  “Of course I understand that,” Ramsey said. He sat down, the weight of what he was asking driving him down into the couch as though he was carrying a boulder. “But I’m not the one asking for you to do it. This is about what’s necessary for the magic to take effect, Char. The fact that you can even do it is a miracle.”

  “Doesn’t feel very miraculous,” I muttered petulantly and tapped my fingers impatiently on the table.

  When he stared at me with the same look in his eyes that he’d used every time I pushed back when he was trying to teach me something, I decided maybe it was time for me to shut up and listen to him. At least for a few minutes.

  “Well, it is,” Ramsey shot back, after what felt like forever. “The specifics of this spell are insane, to say the least. It can’t be spread over more than two people at one time, and it needs both Supplicant and Conduit energy signatures to work.”

  Ramsey ticked everything he said off on his fingers, like he was making a list, and continues. “As well as a deep, profound connection with the host you’re trying to exploit while using the spell.”

  He took a deep breath, and shook his head at the look on my face. There was no mistaking the fact that I was in shock, especially with all of the very specific items he was identifying.

  “Make no mistake,” he went on, “all of this means that you are, very likely, the only being in the world who can perform this spell, and that Abram is the only being in the world you can perform it on.”

  What Ramsey was saying didn’t make any sense, and I told him so. “Why would someone create a spell only one person can use? That only I could use, and only on Abram, for that matter? He’s been gone for a year. How would they know we’d cross paths again?”

  “Maybe they saw you coming,” Stacey interjected as she walked into the room, digging a spoon into a giant bowl of vanilla ice cream and smiling widely. “Maybe they created the spell because they knew you’d need it one day, but they wanted to keep that sort of power away from those who might use it to do harm or destroy the world. Maybe they forged it with a specific set of hoops that they knew only you could jump through.” She licked the spoon, smiling even wider and looking like an absolute maniac. “Of course, that’s just a guess.”

  I groaned, realizing what was going on here. “You’re not serious,” I said, indignation flooding me as I leapt to my feet. “This is your people? The Wandering Watchers or whatever?”

  “That’s not even close to our name.” Stacey set the bowl on the counter next to the sink with a soft thud. “Although I suppose that you already know that, and that it’s not important. The fact is, you have what you need, and you can do this.”

  “What I need,” I said, “is a way to get this spell to work without having to deal with the thing that took over Abram’s body.” Although, if Stacey really were all-knowing, she would already know that.

  “That’s what you want,” Stacey corrected. “And, as your future best friend and godmother to any possible children that you may or may not be having, I want you to have what you want, but I’m also here to inform you that the things you want and the things you need aren’t always the same. They’re just not, regardless of how much we might want them to be.”

  “Are you saying that I need to go in there and do this with Abram?” I didn’t even bother touching her comment about her being my best friend. Or the one about any future children. “Are you saying I’m going to get something out of it? That it’s more than just about saving the world.”

  Stacey shrugged. “I’m saying my people don’t do anything for no reason. If they’re the ones who created this spell, they did it knowing that it was going to get you naked in the room with the man you love, ready and willing to open your heart. That means that there’s a damn good explanation for their actions, and you shouldn’t spit in the way of that.” She plugged her hands on her hips and glare at me. “And you can sure as hell bet it has nothing to do with some twisted idea of cruel embarrassment.”

  With that, I thought she was done talking. She leaned forward on the counter again, and picked up the remainder of her ice cream, before turning a cheeky smile on me. “Come on, it’s not the end of the world,” Stacey said before brandishing her spoon almost like a weapon and pointing it at me. “Your guy is hot, and if the stories you’re going to tell me in the future are to be believed, he’s insanely good in bed. There are definitely worse things in the world than being emotionally, physically, and sexually gratified.” She grabbed my arm and squeezed. “I guess what I’m saying is that you should have fun while you have the chance. Even if it’s not what you’re expecting, or what you think you want.”

  Before I thought better of myself, I let the magic flow from my mind, and her hand was yanked from my arm.

  I marched past her and Ramsey, ignoring the chuckle that came from her and the surprised grunt that came from him. I walked into the room and closed the door behind me before I could overthink it like I wanted to.

  Abram, having already been told what was supposed to happen here, was shirtless and fiddling with the button on his jeans.

  “Wait,” I said, twisting the knob on the handle to lock it and holding my hand out in front of me to stop him in his tracks.

  The man looked up at me, a devilish grin spreading across his face. “You’d rather if I went slow?” he practically purred at me.

  He was enjoying this. More than that, he was enjoying the idea that I might be enjoying it. That’s why he wa
s going along with it without a fuss. Worse than that, he was doing it with a smile on his face and an obvious bulge in his pants.

  If I was being honest, the truth was that somewhere in the darkest part of my brain, I knew that he was right. Who could blame me? The man standing in front of me was the love of my life. At least, physically he was. As much as I’d missed Abram’s mind, I missed the physical contact of our bodies, too. The idea of having it back, even for a tiny little moment in time, was enough to send a shiver of unwanted anticipation down my spine.

  Still, I had to make sure this man knew what was going on, and that he had as much of the truth as I could give him. I owed the Abram trapped inside his head that much. If he knew what was happening, he had to know that I was only doing this to get him back.

  “I want to make one thing clear,” I said, walking toward him as I began to strip off my clothes. “This is about necessity only. Nothing else. This is what has to happen in order for us to save Huntsman, in order for us to save the world. If I could do it any other way, and I do mean any other way, that’s how I would be doing it.” I dropped my shirt to the floor. “As it stands, I can’t. But don’t get it twisted. This—” I motioned between the two of us in an attempt to get his eyes off my chest. “—isn’t something I want to do, and it’s not something that we will ever be repeating.”

  “Whatever you say, sweetheart,” Abram chuckled before he pulled his jeans down and freeing himself from the last of his clothing.

  His body was as perfect and amazing as I remembered it, minus the scars and the brand. The golden glow of his deep tanned skin, the dark curls of hair on his chest, even his chiseled abs were just like I remembered. Damnit if he wasn’t like a male model, minus the creepy body shaving they did. God, he had me close to moaning, just by stripping down.

  I watched his body, unashamed at the desire that coursed through my veins. If I had to be this close to a man I wasn’t in love with, at least it was a good view. This Abram liked to be watched, if the way his body shifted was any indication. That and the cocky smile that graced his lips while his eyes roved over my body.

  Taking a deep breath, I walked over to him, not even caring that I wasn’t wearing a shirt. His breath caught as I stepped up to his chest and placed my hand over his heart. The moment that our skin touched, I felt the familiar jolt of electricity that came with our contact. It was so intense that I almost went to my knees.

  A year. I’d gone a year without his touch, and an entire year’s worth of desire that coursed through me all at once.

  Abram’s hands wound their way around my almost naked abdomen. One hand wrapped around my waist, and the other crept up until he was cupping my neck. His fingers were rough, abrading as they grazed over the sensitive skin on my body. He didn’t touch my breasts, or try and remove my pants. No, Abram took his time and seduced me with his touch in a way I wasn’t prepared for.

  It was a touch I thought I’d never have again. Abram, the only man who knew that my skin needed that tenderness. That caress without the rush. It didn’t matter that Abram wasn’t here, that the man touching me didn’t know my body. The muscle memory was still there—it was the only explanation. His hands grasped me and held on, giving me what I needed from him.

  I needed more. More than I had right now. Instinctively, I leaned forward, reaching for his lips with my own. But as much as I wanted it, I couldn’t do this. I took his wrists in my hands and held them between us, breaking the contact between our bodies except for the barest of touches.

  “Say it,” I said with a ragged breath that I wasn’t able to control. My chest heaved, and I forced the words out. “Tell me what your deepest, darkest truth is.”

  That’s what this spell was meant for. It had to work this way. I had to have it, and I needed to get it over with as quickly as possible. As soon as it was done, I wouldn’t have the opportunity to give in, to touch him again. Unfortunately for me, Abram wasn’t playing along.

  “No,” he said gruffly and reached for me again. “You go first. I don’t even know what my truth is, let alone how to express it.” When my body was pressed up against his, he growled. Literally growled. His hard cock pressed into my stomach, and I couldn’t help it. I leaned into him, craving the way it felt.

  “You’re useless,” I muttered against his chest. Taking a deep breath, I searched myself until I found the thing that hurt the most. The truth that destroyed me every single time I thought about it. The truth I couldn’t face even on the brightest day. I closed my eyes, because I couldn’t bare to look in his eyes and not see the emotions that Abram was supposed to have when he looked at me. I muttered, “I’d give up everything in this world, let it burn down to the ground, if I could have Abram back. The real Abram.”

  Abram’s heart started to race; I could feel it pounding even though my eyes were closed.

  “Wow,” he said quietly.

  “It’s your turn” I said, still not looking at him. “Tell the truth that you don’t want anyone to know.”

  “The truth is,” he said before stopping suddenly.

  I listened to his heart beating, not able to concentrate on anything but the steady rhythm as it lulled me into a false sense of comfort. I was afraid, too. Horrified to hear whatever truth he was about to spout.

  “The real truth, the truth I don’t want to tell anyone, and that I’ll deny the second this is over…is that I wish I was that man. The one you want back in your life.” He coughed, and I felt his arousal start to fade. “I wish I could be that man for you. I wish I could give him back to you.”

  I don’t know what I expected to happen next, but the soft kiss that he pressed to my forehead wasn’t it. That touch, though...it did something. As soon as his lips touched my skin, I felt a flash of clarity that I couldn’t deny.

  I jerked back, out of his touch and gasped as it hit me. Once I felt like I could breathe again, I finally looked up at Abram, who had somehow put his pants back on without me noticing.

  “I know,” I said breathlessly as I saw the same look on his face. “I know where the genie is.”

  Chapter 19

  “This can’t be right,” Huntsman said as we stepped into the suddenly appearing rural area. He crossed his arms over his chest and peered off into the distance.

  I wasn’t expecting this. I most definitely wasn’t prepared for it. Of all the places I expected to find the genie when the spell was cast, I never in a million years imagined it would be here. I never thought I’d come back to where life with magic had really started. To the place that almost killed me more times than I cared to admit. It was the same place, though, that had brought me to the greatest love of my life.

  Huntsman looked at the rickety old bridge that held so many of my memories. “Where exactly is this place?”

  “New Haven,” I said, then swallowed hard as I remembered just how much this place meant to me. It was the place I met Abram for the first time. It was where Lulu and I spent the best days of our lives. It was where I last saw my father and where my mother was buried. My whole life was here, and now it seemed this genie was too. I took another deep breath, blinking back hot tears and trying to keep myself together. “This is home.”

  “This is where you’re from?” Abram asked, looking over at me with narrowed eyes and a look on his face that made it seem like he’d bit into a lemon. “This is where you grew up?”

  “It’s where you’re from, too, in a way,” I answered.

  Remembering that Abram had spent many of his years in this place before we met, before I was even born, rocked me to my core. I shook my head, sighing. That didn’t matter. Abram wasn’t here, and explaining all of this to the man standing in his place was a mountain I didn’t feel like climbing at this particular moment.

  “It’s a long story,” was all I said to the question on his face.

  “We need to get off the road and out of sight,” Ramsey said, striding over to stand beside me and running a hand through his hair the way he always did
when he was stressed. “This is your home, which means you’ll be recognized.” His gaze darted from me to Abram and back again. “Both of you. Seeing you here will only lead to questions we can’t answer and serve to split our focus at a time when we certainly don’t need that happening.”

  “There’s a bomb shelter on the far side of town,” Stacey said, matter-of-factly from where she stood on the other side of Huntsman.

  I tried to ignore that she had a bag of chips and was crunching away on them, but I couldn’t. Not when my stomach started to grumble.

  She laughed and held it out, so I stuck my hand in the bag and grabbed as many chips as I could hold. I grunted in appreciation while I proceeded to stuff my face. That didn’t stop me from enjoying the way the salt from the chips tasted, though. When Ramsey tried to take one of them, I slapped his hand away.

  “It was built during that whole ‘Russian bomb fever’ thing last century,” Stacey continued. “Anyway, it’s filled with dried food and bottled water. There’s a code, but you find it carved into the side of the building and then you tell me about it. So, I already know.” She shrugged. “If we go there, we won’t be disturbed.”

  Stacey was really starting to piss me off. She had these interesting little tidbits like that, sometimes helpful. Sure, she was more useful than she was annoying. But I still had to wonder: if she knew these things, why did we bother going through all of this crap? If she knew we were going to end up here, why not just tell us that in the first place? Why would she make me go through the process of casting the spell, of being in that room with Abram? If she knew this was the direction we needed to go, then why not just give us everything we needed from the start and save us all the trouble?