Only the Beginning: Only You, #4

by Thorpe, Elle

  Riley knelt by my side, pulling back my hair while I tried to wave him off. “Go. Nobody wants to see this,” I moaned.

  “Stop. You’re sick. Let me help you.”

  I shook my head, but then his big hand was rubbing warm, slow circles on my back, and it felt so nice I stopped protesting. When my stomach seemed to have settled, I sat back on the cool bathroom tiles and slumped against the basin. Riley left but then came back with a glass of water and some ibuprofen. He smiled sympathetically while brushing limp strands of hair from my eyes.

  My eyes watered, but I tried to smile. “Thank you. Sorry.”

  “No, I’m sorry. I didn’t even realise how much we drank last night. I hate that you’re sick.”

  He frowned, and I fought through the fuzzy memories. Winning the gold. Riley and I going all the way on the beach, in what had to be one of the most romantic experiences of my life. Going back to his place, where we’d cracked open a bottle of wine and toasted my win. We’d sat up until the sun rose, talking like we hadn’t talked in years. We’d finished that bottle, and another, in between talking and kissing and touching. We’d gone to bed in the early hours of the morning, and I’d fallen asleep, curled into his body. His home was so quiet. It was warm and comfortable and lived-in in a way my place, with its sleek lines and cold metal, wasn’t. It had been a night where everything felt right and easy.

  I hadn’t even noticed how drunk I was. But I was feeling it now.

  “Come on, let’s put you back to bed. In a few hours, you’ll be feeling a whole lot better.”

  He put one arm around my back, the other beneath my knees, and lifted me off the bathroom floor as if I weighed nothing. I rested my head on his shoulder, loving the way his arms felt around me.

  He padded down the hallway to his room, but the open door of the bedroom next to his caught my eye. It was painted a bright purple, and the walls were covered with photos of teenage girls smiling at the camera, and posters of actors and singers. I spotted a few of one of the young guys on my show. A single bed sat in the middle of the space, neatly made with a white bedspread with tiny purple flowers on it.

  My eyes widened. “You weren’t supposed to have Sadie today, were you?” I tried to scramble out of his arms. “I can go.” Jesus, I hadn’t even considered his daughter. That would be just my luck, to be standing here with my hair a mess, mascara smudged everywhere, and wearing nothing but one of Riley’s t-shirts when his daughter came home for the weekend.

  But Riley’s arm tightened around me. “Relax. She’s at her mum’s this weekend.”

  I stopped squirming. Because I didn’t even know how I’d manage to make it home in this state.

  Riley walked us back to his bedroom and deposited me gently on the bed, pulling up the clean white sheets and climbing in beside me. I rolled to face him. The space between his eyebrows wrinkled, and I reached out to smooth it with my thumb.

  “What’s the matter?”

  He sighed. “There’s something I need to tell you.”

  “Okay,” I said slowly, a hint of worry creeping through me. I didn’t like the look on his face, and I had a feeling I wasn’t going to like what he said next.

  “It’s about Sadie.” He propped an elbow underneath his head. “She’s moving in with me. Full time.”

  “Oh,” I said, my eyebrows raising. “That’s…nice. Right?”

  Riley’s frown deepened. “It’s more than nice, B. It’s something I’ve wanted from the minute I found out she existed.”

  “Of course.” I nodded, trying to sort his words through my foggy brain. “Why didn’t you tell me she was moving in?”

  What did that mean for him and me? I hadn’t seen Sadie in years, not since she was a little girl. I knew Riley only saw her every second weekend, so she hadn’t really been on my radar. Which I realised now, was incredibly self-centred of me. But I was used to being alone. I hadn’t had to consider a partner in a very long time.

  Riley pushed off the bed and pulled on a t-shirt. I wanted to pout as his abs disappeared beneath the material. Though the opportunity to look at his ass was a nice consolation prize. But when he turned around, his face was tight.

  “Hey,” I said, reaching out a hand to him, careful not to move too fast in fear of setting off my stomach again. “What’s wrong?”

  He shook his head and went to leave the room, but then he stopped. “She’s not a baby, you know, Bianca. It’s not like you’d have to change her nappies or give her bottles. She’s fifteen.”

  “I know?” I wasn’t sure where he was going with all this.

  “I didn’t tell you because every time we talk about her, you get that look on your face.”

  “What look?” I asked, confused, and a little annoyed myself. I didn’t like his accusatory tone.

  “That look that says you’d rather be talking about anything in the world apart from my daughter.”

  My prickle of irritation grew. He was being unfair. “That’s not true.”

  He sighed and came back to sit on the bed. “I don’t want to fight about this. Not after last night.”

  My mind flashed back to making love with him on the beach. Something we hadn’t done in years. We fucked a lot, but we hadn’t made love since we were twenty. I softened. I didn’t want to fight either.

  “I do want to hear about your daughter. The two of you are a package deal, I know that.”

  He nodded. “Even more so now. Her mum is moving, and she wants to live with me. This is huge, Bianca. I’ve tried so hard to form a relationship with her. I want her here with me more than I want anything in the world.”

  I nodded.

  “But I want you, too. I don’t want Sadie being around more to be a dealbreaker for you. And I’m scared it is. I know you don’t like kids.”

  I ran my fingers along the edges of the sheet. “That’s not true. I like them. I just don’t have any experience with them.”

  I didn’t say it out loud, but the real problem was that Sadie made me nervous. I knew how much Riley adored her. If I was going to be with him, she would become a big part of my life, too. And that meant I’d be bringing a child into my world. A world that was full of people trying to take advantage of you. Paparazzi taking your photo without your permission. Reporters chasing you while you drove. People watching your every move. My sister had been a casualty of this life, and it scared me to bring another child into it.

  But I wanted Riley so much. It was selfish.

  I so desperately wanted to be selfish.

  Riley reached out and took my hand. “Look, this is all a bit premature anyway. We’ve been a couple less than twenty-four hours. We have time to deal with all this. Sadie is moving in next weekend, but that doesn’t mean you need to meet her right away. We can hang out at your place until you’re more comfortable with the idea of her.”

  I shook my head, not happy that he was babying me. He completely had the wrong idea. I wasn’t worried about her hating me. I was an actress on a pretty popular TV show. And she was a fifteen-year-old girl. She’d love me. I needed to tell him about what had happened to my sister, but when I opened my mouth to try, a new worry occurred to me. Riley seemed to be protesting an awful lot.

  “Are you saying that because you don’t want me meeting her?”

  “No! Of course not.”

  I nodded. We were both overreacting. Sadie wasn’t my daughter. The media probably wouldn’t even care if Riley had a kid. Not unless we got married, but lord, that wasn’t even on the horizon. Definitely not something I needed to consider now. I couldn’t date Riley without meeting his daughter. Especially not if she was going to live here. So I pushed all my worries aside and smiled at him reassuringly. “Good. Because I want to meet her. I really do.”

  I pulled his hand to my mouth and kissed his palm, deciding to keep my family secrets quiet for a little longer.

  24

  Riley

  Cloud nine felt pretty damn good. Bianca and I were together. We were offici
al, and even though I still sensed some hesitation on her part, she was adamant that she wanted to meet Sadie tonight. I’d tried to talk her out of it, considering she was hungover enough to be vomiting, but she’d waved my concern away, curled up in my bed, and gone back to sleep. I tucked a blanket around her still form before picking up my phone and scrolling through to Sadie’s number.

  The photo I’d added to her contact information made me smile. She was sitting in front of a cake covered in chocolate frosting. The two of us had baked it together, for no reason other than we both felt like chocolate, and a packet mix was all I had in the cupboard. Moments after the photo had been taken, I’d shoved her face right in the cake, making her squeal. But she was such a good-natured kid. After the initial shock, she’d picked up the remains of the smushed chocolate mess and hurled them straight at me, starting an epic food fight. It had taken us hours to clean the kitchen afterwards, but it had been worth it. The memory of that day was more important than any amount of cleaning.

  I shot off a text message, suggesting that we go to La Mer for dinner. It was one of the swankiest restaurants in the city, and I knew Sadie would love it. I was already imagining the ten minutes we’d have to wait while she Instagrammed each course. Bianca’s phone rang in shrill tones from the lounge room, and I winced, the noise cutting through my head. Bianca wasn’t the only one sporting a hangover this morning. Though at least I wasn’t vomiting. Bianca didn’t stir, even when the phone rang again. I pushed off the bed and tiptoed out to where she’d left the offending device, just wanting to be sure it wasn’t her parents. I didn’t want to wake her. She’d looked practically green in the few minutes she’d been conscious earlier. But if her parents were calling with an emergency, that would be different altogether. I squinted at the screen. Tangie. Her manager. I put it back down. Nope. She could wait until Bianca had at least slept for a few hours.

  I crawled back across the bed to where Bianca lay on her side, the gentle rise and fall of her chest assuring me she was still asleep. Good. She needed it. I fitted my chest to her back, tucked my knees in behind hers, and buried my nose into her hair, feeling completely content. My daughter was happy and excited and only days away from moving in with me full time. And I had the woman I’d wanted ever since I’d lost her. I relaxed into the mattress and let Bianca’s soft, warm body lull me to sleep.

  When I woke up, it was to Bianca tugging off my sleep shorts. The sun outside the window seemed low, dark shadows stretching out across the ceiling. We had to have slept most of the day away. My arm was still locked around Bianca’s waist, forcing her to reach behind to touch me. She stilled, realising I was awake, then glanced over her shoulder.

  “I was going to wake you up in the best way possible. But your shorts won’t budge.”

  “Drawstring,” I whispered before nibbling at her ear. “How are you feeling?”

  She turned away from me again, wiggling her ass against my erection. “Much better. You?”

  Even if I’d felt sick enough to curl up and die, I wouldn’t have told her that when her fingertips were slipping beneath the waistband of my shorts. She twisted so she was facing me, then pushed me flat to my back, her eyes hooded as she straddled me, shifting down my body, taking my clothes with her. My balls clenched as the air hit them, and my cock stood tall, a drop of liquid shining at the tip, just waiting for her.

  “Take your shirt off,” I commanded. I was pretty sure she was naked beneath that thin material and I wanted to see.

  Her fingers clenched in the hem of the oversized shirt I’d given her from my drawer last night. She dragged it up her thighs and then higher, across her belly, revealing that she was indeed, completely bare beneath. I reached out a hand to touch her, but she stopped me.

  “This is just about you. You can look, but right now, I just want to touch you.”

  I frowned and began to shake my head, but then she pulled the shirt off the rest of the way, and my brain short-circuited. She leant over me, her hardened nipples brushing my chest, and made her way down my body, kissing, licking, and nipping as she went. My cock throbbed at the sight of her naked body, and her warm, wet, mouth dipping closer to where I really wanted it.

  She’d said no touching, but when her tongue shot out and licked the drop of liquid from my tip, I couldn’t stop myself. I ran my fingers through her hair. She lifted her gaze to meet mine and gave me a sly smile. Then, without breaking eye contact for a moment, she closed her mouth over my cock and sucked me deep.

  By sheer force of will, I kept my hips chained to the mattress beneath me. What I really wanted to do was jerk so my cock would plunge even farther into her warmth. But I fought that urge and watched while she controlled the show. She ran her tongue along the underside, flicking it over the head, each time taking me a little deeper into her mouth. Her pretty pink lips ran up and down my length, shining in the late afternoon light and completely capturing my imagination. My breathing increased as the feel of her wrapped around me stole my oxygen. She cupped my balls and tugged at them gently until the head of my cock hit the back of her throat. I groaned. God, she felt good, her practiced tongue swirling around me in the way she knew I loved. She increased her pace, and I dared to let my hips move a little, thrusting into her mouth, testing how much she could take. But the gleam in her eye and the small moans of pleasure she let out told me she was more than just okay.

  “Let go,” she murmured between sucks.

  I closed my eyes, letting the sensation building in the base of my spine and my balls take over. I gripped her hair harder and thrust into her wet, soft mouth, until I couldn’t hold on another moment. My release ripped through me, emptying into her throat. She moaned her satisfaction but didn’t let up with her sucking and licking. When I couldn’t take any more, I moved her away from my cock and up to my lips. I cupped her face between my hands, then kissed her hard on the mouth. She was smiling coyly when she pulled away, and I dropped my head back on the pillow, completely boneless and spent.

  I flung an arm over my face but grinned when she started laughing. My breath caught again with how stunning she was. Her hair was tousled, last night’s mascara still smudged around her eyes, but she’d never looked more beautiful. I found her lips, kissing her, slow and soft this time.

  We kissed until words I wasn’t ready to say, and she wasn’t ready to hear, fought to break free.

  “My turn now,” I whispered. Better to steer the conversation back to sex. Something safe and familiar for us. I’d scare her off if I voiced any of the feelings coursing through me.

  But she pushed off the bed and moved around the room towards the door.

  I scrunched my face up in disgust.

  She threw a pillow at me. “It’s late. If we’re going out for dinner, we need to have a shower.”

  Right. Dinner. I supposed we had to leave this bed. I consoled myself with the fact I could bring her back in here in just a few hours. I nodded, grabbed my phone, and checked for a text message from Sadie, but the battery had died.

  “It needs to charge, but go get ready, and we’ll just swing by her house. If she’s not up for it, the two of us can at least go get some food. I’m starving.”

  “Me, too,” Bianca said as she walked backwards towards my bathroom door. She paused in the doorway. “Riley. I said we need a shower…”

  I was up, across the room and kissing her before she could change her mind.

  25

  Bianca

  My fingers shook as I attempted to swipe on my mascara, and after three unsuccessful attempts, I admitted defeat and put the wand down. I stared into my reflection in Riley’s bathroom mirror.

  “You’ve got this. She’s going to love you.”

  I nodded firmly and picked up the mascara again, ignoring the fact my hand hadn’t stopped shaking. Why the hell was I so nervous? This was ridiculous. I had a nation full of teenage girls who loved me. Why would this one be any different?

  Because she was different. I knew exactly h
ow important she was to Riley. Which meant that tonight had to go well.

  “You ready?” Riley asked, leaning on the bathroom doorframe. I capped my mascara wand and closed the gap between us, finding his hand with my own.

  “Absolutely,” I said with a confidence I had to fake. I didn’t want to give him any sign of how nervous I was. But of course, he saw right through me.

  He grasped my face between his palms and stared deep into my eyes. “Stop stressing. It’s going to be fine. I promise.”

  A handful of the butterflies swirling around my stomach flew off. “Do you think she’d accept bribes in the form of Tate Jennings signed posters? Maybe an introduction?”

  Riley’s lips quirked up at the side. “Isn’t Tate Jennings at least twenty-one?”

  “Something like that.”

  He shrugged. “I suppose he’s better than Chris Hemsworth.”

  I laughed and kissed his cheek. “Babe, no one is better than Chris Hemsworth.”

  Riley rolled his eyes so hard I was surprised they didn’t fall right out of his head.

  “Come on, Hemsworth hater. Let’s do this.” I linked my fingers through his, and he let me lead him down the hall to the front door. I was still laughing when I stepped aside so he could open it wide. We stepped out onto his porch, the door swinging shut behind us with a crack.

  A wall of noise hit us like a punch to the face.

  Swarms of people who had been waiting out on the footpath rushed across Riley’s lawn, circling around us. Within seconds we were completely surrounded. My fingers tightened around Riley’s. I was used to the paparazzi, but this was like nothing I’d ever seen before. At worst, I had one or two guys with cameras outside my place each day. They were generally respectful, and from time to time I even used them to my advantage, letting them take shots of me when I had a movie coming up or I had a new brand promotion going on. But this was next level. I was too shocked to even move. How had they even found out where I was? Or where Riley lived?