Confessions of an Alli Cat

by Courtney Cole

  I inhale shakily and try to get a hold of myself as I grip the edges of the table so tightly that my knuckles turn white.

  As the buzzing threatens to send me over the edge this time and I struggle to look normal, I waver between hating Shade and loving him. This is an excruciating pain/pleasure. And it’s exciting as hell because everyone around me is going on with dinner as usual because they have no idea that I’m on the verge of having an orgasm in my seat.

  Shade releases the button and I release the edge of the table.

  Oh my Lord.

  I breathe out slowly.

  I glance at Shade, with a tiny glare, and he smiles beatifically again.

  Freaking punk.

  As if he read my mind, Shade pushes the button again immediately.

  And I arch against the table. My uterus is screaming as it threatens to contract me right into an orgasm. I’m practically panting as Brian continues to talk in his boring monotone.

  And then the waiter comes to take our main dish order.

  I expect Shade to relent, to release the button.

  But he doesn’t.

  In fact, as I’m getting ready to bite out my order, he increases the speed.

  I cry out and both the waiter and Brian stare at me in concern.

  “Are you alright?” Brian asks again. I nod, unable to speak.

  I take a deep breath and try again.

  “Fine. I’d. Like. Pasta Alfredo.” I’m speaking stiltedly, but I can’t help it. They’re just lucky that I’m not screaming right now. Holy shit. I’m going to come with both of them staring at me.

  I grip the table as the waiter takes Brian’s order.

  “I’ll. Be right. Back,” I manage to eke out.

  I spring from the table and practically sprint for the ladies room.

  The entire way, the egg is buzzing along nicely, doing its job to drive me to the brink of madness. As I’m closing the door, it is pushed open and Shade stands there. The remote control is dangling from his hand. He releases the button, and the agonizing/amazing vibrations stop. He locks the door.

  Then drops the remote.

  He falls to his knees and shoves up my skirt, nuzzling my inner thigh. I bury my hands in his hair.

  “You’re a devil,” I tell him raggedly as he licks my freaking clit. Then he pulls out my egg and drops it with the remote.

  “I wanted to feel you come rather than watch it,” he tells me as pushes me against the wall. I hear the rustling of foil again and then Shade is sliding into me, long and thick and full.

  Holy Freaking Hell.

  I’m ready for him because of the egg. No further foreplay is necessary.

  And I’m having sex in a public bathroom.

  It’s a very clean and fancy public bathroom, but still.

  And it doesn’t matter.

  “Do you know how sexy you are?” Shade murmurs in my ear as he nibbles at it.

  He is surging against me, the muscles of his torso pushing me into the wall and it is an exquisite, sensual feeling. His hands curve around until they are cupping my ass, pulling me to him.

  Because of the egg, I come in two minutes flat.

  I fall limply against Shade as he tenses, then relaxes.

  He just came.

  I stare at him.

  “Do you come with all of your clients?”

  The question is out before I even know it. Because honestly, I don’t want to know about his other clients.

  He grins down at me as he peels off the condom and drops it into the trash. His thighs might as well be chiseled from marble. That is how muscled he is. My eyes are glued to them as he pulls up his trousers and fastens them.

  “I’m a guy, Alli Cat,” he answers. “I can pretty much come anytime, anywhere.”

  For now, I think silently, remembering how Rick the Dick started having problems with that as he got older. But I don’t tell Shade. He’ll figure it out in about fifteen years.

  “Now, part two of your mission is to go back out there and have dinner like nothing ever happened,” Shade tells me. “You can do it. You are daring and fun.”

  “I am daring and fun,” I repeat firmly as I pull my skirt down and straighten my hair.

  “Then, you will join me at Utopia after dinner. I have a surprise planned for you tonight.”

  He grins wickedly and I am instantly apprehensive.

  “Another surprise? I’m old, Shade. I don’t know that my heart can take two surprises in one day.”

  I’m only half-joking.

  Shade laughs. “You’re not old. You’re in your sexual prime. And so am I. Let’s use that to our advantage, shall we?”

  Well, hell. If he wants to put it that way.

  I return to Brian’s table and apologize. I explain that I had a sudden headache onset, but that I took some aspirin in the bathroom and that I’m feeling better already. I eat the entire bowl of pasta, feeling certain that I’m going to need the carbs as fuel for the rest of my evening with Shade.

  ********

  It turns out that I was oh-so-very correct. I needed those carbs.

  Shade meets me at the curb of Utopia. Under the neon signs of the street, I am stricken once again by how very handsome he is. Holy hell. He is strong and tall and confident. His face is absolutely, perfectly chiseled. Once again, he leads me through the back hallways of the club to a quiet room.

  After we enter, Shade pulls me into his arms, kissing me roughly.

  “I’ve been thinking about you for the past hour,” he admits to me. “That was sexy as hell, Alli Cat.”

  And it was, I have to admit. My knees actually still feel a little weak from our little escapade in the restaurant.

  I let his tongue explore my mouth, my neck, my breasts, as he pulls the straps of my dress down and licks at my nipples. I bury my hands in his hair once again. He’s got thick dark hair. It’s every bit as soft as it looks, too.

  He pulls away.

  “Tonight, I’m going to do you a favor,” he tells me. “I know you’ll be dating again soon. A sexy woman like you isn’t going to sit at home alone for long.”

  I start to say something, but he puts a finger to my lips.

  “And I want you to be prepared. I already know that you like to be good at everything you do. It’s in your nature. So, tonight, I’m going to show you exactly what will drive a man wild. And you’re going to enjoy the lesson.”

  My lips curve into a smile. He’s very perceptive, this one. He’s already got me pegged.

  “So, you’re going to turn me into a sex goddess?” I ask with a grin.

  He smiles back as he pulls me to him.

  “You already are a sex goddess,” he tells me. “I’m going to turn you into a very skilled sex goddess who can bring a man to his knees in five minutes flat.”

  I smile wider. “I’m going to enjoy tonight,” I answer.

  “Oh, me too,” he says confidently, winking before he continues.

  “Okay. First, to set the scenario. You’re going to pretend that I’m a guy who you have been dating and you are very into me. This is ‘the night’. The first night that you have sex. And you’re going to take total and complete charge because that’s sexy as hell. And I’m going to tell you what to do. I don’t want you to argue—just do everything I say and commit it to memory. Can you do that?”

  I nod, a slow grin forming again. “Of course. I have an excellent memory.”

  “I’ll bet you do,” Shade grins back. “You are at your date’s house…my house. You are sitting in the living room, having a glass of wine. Tell me that you’re going to change into something more comfortable. Then walk into his bedroom and find one of his dress shirts in his closet. Take off your bra and leave on your panties. Take off your stockings and leave on your heels. Unbutton the shirt until the curve of your breast is visible. Then walk back out here very confidently and stand in front of me.”

  “Done.” I turn on my heel and start to walk away.

  “Wait,”
Shade calls. “You didn’t tell me anything.”

  Crap. I turn around.

  “I’m going to change into something a little more comfortable,” I tell him. I smile what I hope is a sexy grin. Shade nods.

  “Make yourself at home,” he answers, grinning back.

  I slip into the bathroom and look around. The bathroom is incredibly nice, filled with marble and granite and pewter fixtures. There is also a closet. I open it and lo and behold, there is a dress shirt hanging there.

  I smile and slip it from the hanger.

  I do exactly what Shade told me. I unbutton the shirt until I can see the curve of my breast in the mirror. I tousle my hair so that I look sexy. I peel off my stockings and leave on my underwear, but put my heels back on.

  Shade has moved to the couch in the sitting area of the room. He is sitting with his legs crossed and is sipping a glass of wine. He’s perfectly in character.

  He stares at me as I emerge from the bathroom.

  “You look beautiful,” he tells me quietly. “Come here.”

  I walk toward him, expecting him to want me on his lap. But when I get a few feet in front of him, he says, “Stop.”

  I stop.

  “Now stand there for a moment. Look me in the eye.”

  I do.

  He stares at me.

  “Be confident,” he instructs.

  My chin comes up and I jut my hips out.

  A grin slowly spreads over Shade’s face.

  “That’s perfect. Men like to look,” he explains. “And women don’t usually like to be looked at. They feel vulnerable, exposed. They are self-conscious about their perceived flaws. What they don’t understand is that men don’t see them the same way they see themselves. We see curves and we love those curves. Confidence is sexy as hell, Alli Cat. It’s the sexiest possible thing that you can wear.”

  Holy shit. I remember when Sara told me that very same thing. Was she actually right about something?

  “Now, walk straight over here, maintaining eye contact. Straddle me and kiss me thoroughly.”

  So, I do. His mouth tastes like vodka, tonic and lime. His large hands cup my ass and pull me into him so that I’m grinding against his muscle. I can feel the dampness of my panties as I straddle his crotch.

  “Now, flip around.”

  I stare at him, confused.

  “Throw one leg over and turn around on my lap,” he tells me. “And grind for just a moment more.”

  I am still confused, but I do what he says.

  His breathing is a little labored when he says, “Now, stand up.”

  I stand up, directly in front of him.

  “Bend over.”

  Without hesitation, I bend over.

  I feel slightly ridiculous, but I can hear Shade breathing. He likes this. He’s looking at my ass, I can tell. So, I cross one knee over the over and stick it out just a little further.

  “Men love the way a woman’s ass is framed by her panties,” he tells me. “It’s always nice to see it. Women are usually so fast to throw their panties off and dive under the covers.”

  He reaches up and grabs my ass. “And you’ve got a fine ass.”

  I smile.

  “Now, step away from me, turn and take off your panties. Toss them into my lap. Maintain eye contact with me the entire time.”

  I follow his instructions word for word. And oddly, even though he is directing me, I feel solidly in control. Shade’s eyes are glued to my every movement. Everything that I am doing is something that I know he is enjoying. The evidence is in the way his pants are straining at his crotch and the way he is breathing so harshly.

  I like it.

  My panties are now in his lap.

  “Sit on my lap again.”

  So I do. Shade’s hands run over my back, down my hips and grab my bare ass as he kisses me. His tongue explores every inch of my mouth before he sucks on the base of my neck.

  I am grinding into his hardness and his hands pull me ever closer.

  He whispers into my ear, “Now stand up and slowly unbutton your shirt. Slip it off, but tease me for a second- hold it to your breasts, as if you’re unsure whether to reveal yourself. Then drop it to the ground. Stand there without moving, with your shoulders back and your chin out. Be confident and let me look at you.”

  “Yes,” I say simply. I stand up and do what he says.

  As I stand and let him look at me, my skin is on fire. I’m not sure who is more turned on, him or me.

  After he looks at me for a couple of minutes and I see the desire in his eyes, he speaks again. His voice is husky and rich.

  “Most women think that in order for them to take charge in the bedroom, they need to be on top. I personally don’t prefer women on top. I think most men would agree. I’m always a little nervous that you’re going to miscalculate and crush my dick. Instead, you can be in control, but still let me feel in control and that is sexy as hell.”

  “How?” I ask softly, licking my lips.

  “Walk over here and bend down. Whisper into my ear that you want me to fuck you now.”

  I walk over, even with my knees weakening by the moment, and bend. I flick my tongue out and lick him lightly at the base of his ear, inhaling his delicious scent.

  “I want you to fuck me now,” I tell him. I am so happy that I have already practiced saying that word at home. It makes it much easier to say now in front of him.

  “Men like naughty words,” he says simply. “Grab my hand and lead me to the bed. When we get there, you can kick off your shoes.”

  We make our way to the bed.

  I kick off my shoes as directed.

  “Now tell me to fuck you.”

  “Fuck me,” I breathe into his ear, before I kiss him heatedly again. He inhales my tongue and bends me back onto the bed. He strips his clothes off in thirty-seconds flat and quickly rolls a condom on. Before I know it, his warm skin is sliding against me. I wrap my legs around him and pull him close.”

  “Tell me you love my cock.”

  “I love your cock,” I whisper into his neck.

  He quickens his pace and slides in and out; hard, then harder. Then he slows.

  “Tell me to fuck you harder.”

  “Fuck me harder,” I murmur.

  So he does. The muscles of his back ripple and strain as he bucks against me. His skin is damp and his dick is hard. I grasp at his shoulders, holding on.

  “Now, tell me to stop.”

  “What??” I look at him wildly. “I don’t want you to stop.”

  Shade grins lazily as he hovers above me. “I don’t particularly want to stop. But I know that if you do this next thing, it will make this sex mind-blowing and that’s what you want, right?”

  I nod.

  “So, tell me to stop.”

  “Stop.”

  “Now, I want you to roll me to the side and suck me. I know that women’s magazines like to tell women to take men to the brink, to almost make them come and then stop because it will make the orgasm more intense. But that’s not true. Usually, it’s only frustrating. Unless you are doing it this way. This way is amazing.”

  I follow his instructions. I feel kinky as hell, because let’s face it, it is kinky as hell. But I suck him. And yes, I taste myself.

  He moves with me, pushing into me. It only takes a couple of minutes before he says, “I’m ready to come. Stop. Come up here and kiss me. Then tell me to bend you over and fuck you.”

  I wipe my mouth and straighten.

  I kiss him. “Bend me over and fuck me,” I tell him softly, against his lips.

  “With pleasure,” he says. He bends me over the bed and easily slides in, then out. Hard, harder, harder.

  “Tell me to come in you.”

  “You’re wearing a condom,” I point out raggedly.

  “It doesn’t matter. It’s just sexy as hell to hear.” He sounds equally ragged.

  “Come in me,” I say.

  “Done,” he answers harshly.
And he leans into my ass, pushing against me, grasping my hips.

  Holy effing shit.

  He shudders for a moment, then he’s still.

  “That was hot as hell,” I tell him as I collapse onto the bed.

  Shade looks at me knowingly as he collapses next to me, his handsome face smug.

  “Yep. And now you are the master of mind-blowing sex. You’re welcome.”

  “Thank you,” I laugh, snuggling into his side. His arm wraps around me and pulls me close and suddenly, it doesn’t feel like we’re client and clientele. I feel like we just had an amazing sexual experience. It was mutually amazing and he enjoyed it as much as I did.

  He’s very, very good at his job.

  Chapter Thirteen

  (Or: I am Cougar, Hear me roar while I do a jello shot)

  The sun is out, the Las Vegas sky is blue and Shade has his hands all over my daughter.

  Okay, not in that way, but still.

  I am lying poolside in a bright yellow bikini top and cut-off denim shorts watching Colby and Sophie’s lesson. He’s currently showing her how to make her butterfly more efficient. And as he does, every muscle in his chest is flexing. If Sophie weren’t here, I would jump into my pool fully clothed and lick each ripple.

  But she is here.

  And so I’m in mom mode. And Shade is Colby.

  And I’m not really liking the fact that his hands are balancing her in the water right now as she practices.

  Does that make me jealous of my own daughter?

  Have I fallen down a freaking rabbit hole?

  I sigh and take a sip of lemonade. Which is sans vodka, by the way, and that is a true tragedy considering the circumstances.

  Since it’s only 3:15 p.m. on a Saturday, I decided to hold off on the alcohol for a bit. Particularly since Rick the Dick will be coming to pick Sophie up for the night here in a bit. I should probably be stone-cold sober for that.

  I really do have amazing fortitude.

  “Sophie, pick up your chin!” Colby calls as Sophie butterflies across the pool. From here, she looks like a very skinny porpoise. Colby glances at me, and his gaze turns wicked. He actually winks as his gaze slides down over my chest, then back up to my eyes.