A Broom Too Far

by Mara Webb

  “I’ll make pasta, bring an appetite!” He smiled and then turned towards his car and lifted bike number one up to the rack.

  I was leaving him to reattach the bikes by himself. I am the worst.

  I closed the front door again, reached over my shoulder and grabbed my wand out of my bag. I held it up defensively as I took cautious steps along the entryway, listening carefully for sounds that might suggest the location of an intruder.

  The lounge had been ransacked. The drawers of the unit by the fireplace were pulled open and the contents sprawled across the carpet. Someone was looking for something specific.

  Where is Quin?

  The couch cushions had been slashed open, the stuffing protruding. I turned and walked towards the kitchen. This room looked less interfered with but there was evidence that someone had been here. The stools at the breakfast bar had been moved away from the counter. Dirt on the seat of one of them suggested that feet had stood on top a stool to reach a higher cupboard. Still no sign of Quin.

  My pulse was racing now, and my hands were trembling. Where were the kittens? There are seven cats in this house and not one of them was making a noise, that is a terrifying sound, silence in a house filled with voices.

  I stepped towards the back door through the laundry room. That’s when I saw it.

  The kittens had fallen asleep in a pile next to a large, black, velvet bag. The soft sound of my sock covered feet had still been loud enough to wake them. They each burst to life in loud, overlapping conversation.

  “Someone was here, a bad someone!”

  “Quin is gone, they gave us meat! I liked the bad someone!”

  “Eggs! Eggs, eggs waffles!”

  “They were looking for books Nora, and special trinkets,” Delphi said. The only helpful remark among that babble. She instantly became my favorite kitten of the day.

  “Delphi, are you guys hurt? Where is Quin?” I asked, almost not wanted to know the answer. Delphi seemed to have a gift for decision making, as if she had access to information the rest of us didn’t. She also had potent protection magic, so again, favorite kitten.

  Delphi gestured towards the stationary velvet bag. It had a drawstring fastening and appeared to have been placed down carefully in front of the washing machine. Quin was in there? Why wasn’t it moving?

  No!

  I shuffled over to the bag, carefully avoiding any kitten paws that were dashing along the ground. My wand now between my teeth, I used both hands to pry open the bag. I heard a yawn, a groan, and then a sudden sharp gasp for air.

  Quin!

  I reached in and pulled out my familiar and held him close to my chest, kissing his furry head. He tolerated it for a few seconds then squirmed free.

  “Nora! Oh Nora, how long have you been gone? A few days? A week? I lost all sense of time in there. The horror. I tried my best to fight them off, I did everything I could. We should probably all have a can of tuna and calm our nerves. I’ve been so alone in there, frightened, panicked. You could never imagine—” He was interrupted by Delphi.

  “The bad someone put you into that enchanted bag within a minute of breaking in. You were asleep the entire time. The magic on the velvet means that anything inside is asleep and silent, it is useful for transporting anxious pets on flights. Even more useful to neutralize a familiar guarding a house full of things to steal,” Delphi concluded.

  She was then pounced on by Jinx, who had started another frantic game of chase that would last at least twenty minutes. Quin and I stood in the laundry room by ourselves as the kittens all bolted off to play their game. I had so many questions I could barely organize them into a priority order, and I knew Quin would need a recovery snack after his ordeal, so we walked towards the kitchen in silence. I could sense him again now that he was free from the velvet.

  I opened the top cupboard next to the refrigerator and pulled out a can of tuna. I peeled back the metal lid using the ring pull and broke the tuna apart with a fork so that separated flakes fell into Quin’s dish. Truly a waste of my time, he would eat the tuna like a vacuum cleaner anyway. Inhaling fish until the plate was clean.

  “You are okay? I mean, I can sense that you aren’t hurt, but tell me anyway.” I needed to diplomatically work my way around the questions so that I could get to ask about what was taken, and who was here.

  Quin jumped up onto the counter and I pulled up a stool to sit next to him. His tongue was now lapping at his front paws as he cleaned behind his ears. That had never made sense to me. Why would behind the ears be dirty when a cat had finished eating? I patiently waited for him to wrap it up, but I had to push him as this cleaning ceremony could take hours.

  “Quin? Hey Quin. Hey, look at me! Come on, you can wash yourself in a minute. I need to know what happened.” I seemed to have caught his attention.

  “Well we were playing with a scarf I had found. I was showing the kittens how to hold it with their front paws and kick at it really fast with their back legs. You should have seen me Nora. My back legs were going so fast. Everyone was really impressed. They all said, ‘Wow that is the coolest thing I have ever seen!’ and—”

  “Quin, get to the relevant bit quicker.”

  “Okay yeah. So, I heard a noise in the laundry room. I left the kittens playing with the scarf and then I walked towards the back door. As I got into the laundry room something moved behind me. They had been hiding behind something, so I hadn’t seen them. They swooped me up off the ground and put me into that bag!

  It was so dark, like the blackest, darkest, most nighty-est night. I felt all drowsy, but I wanted to stay awake and protect the house. I heard another sound, like footsteps moving away from me. The next thing I remember is you opening the bag and pulling me out.”

  I thought he was done. I always made this mistake.

  “I was asleep! I had a dream that I was swimming in the ocean with a big, scary tuna and it was trying to eat ME! Can you imagine? I can laugh about it now, of course, but I was terrified. The water was so wet, and the tuna was so mean, and you were there, and Jinx was there, and Echo was there and—”

  “Quin, did you see them at all? Do you have any idea who came in here? What did they take?” I was getting frustrated now. As wonderful as it was that I lived with a cat that had so much to say, all the time, every day, I needed answers.

  “I didn’t see a face; they were behind me. The kittens said they ate something that the stranger gave to them and then they all fell asleep, they might have been drugged. I don’t know, I think we should all have a big saucer of milk and just try to forget about it.” Quin launched back into his cleaning routine.

  “No, Quin. We need to find out what they took, they might have left a clue. Where should we look first?” I asked. I thought he would know where the most valuable items were. I hadn’t fully explored the house and all its hidden features.

  “Attic, let’s go there first.” Quin jumped off the counter and headed for the stairs, I followed. There was a hatch for the attic in the ceiling of the corridor outside my bedroom. I had never gone up there. I would occasionally hear this creaking, like a heavy body was walking about on the beams. Or a shuffling like a creature with many legs moving something. I didn’t want to go up there, but I had to.

  I pulled the cord to drop the step ladder down. Quin bounced up through the hatch without hesitation. I paused.

  It can’t be that scary. If something was living up there, Quin would have told me. He never stops talking, he would have mentioned it by now. Right?

  I held my wand tightly and began to climb. When my head was high enough to see into the attic I was greeted with darkness.

  “There is a light switch in here somewhere, I haven’t been up in a while. Give me a minute,” Quin said. With a quiet clicking sound, the room was flooded with light. I couldn’t believe my eyes.

  3

  I climbed higher up the step ladder and was surprised with how spacious the attic was, it had such a high ceiling. The room was
beautiful. Walls of white were covered with different colored fabrics that made the room feel softer and more comfortable. Giant pastel blue and pale purple scarves hung from a central point above me that created a tent-like feel. Bookshelves surrounded me on all sides. The attic door had brought me up into the center of the room and I was slowly turning around in circles trying to drink it all in.

  “It’s nice, right? Edith made a library up here because she had so many books. Your family has been collecting ancient texts, special magic books and enchanted bread recipes for centuries.

  “Most of the super rare stuff you would need to borrow from O.W.L. but you have an impressive collection up here. The envy of many witch families. Edith used to get poison pen letters all the time about it. We had a few break ins actually, but then she put a more powerful protection charm over the house, and it stopped.”

  Quin walked over to a large armchair, stretched his front paws up onto the fabric arm elongating his body, then leaped up to sit.

  “So, this is all worth stealing then?” I gestured around the room.

  “Oh yeah, you could steal this and sell it to some other family for big money. They are valuable. There are some spells written in these books that haven’t been used for an age. Some of the stuff is forbidden now actually, new laws made some magic illegal for safety and fairness. We live in a human world; we must be kind.

  “Really it all boils down to this one old guy who wanted to be the world’s greatest trumpet player, for some reason. He used a bunch of magic to make his music flawless, he wrote symphonies and won awards and money. He was taken to a wizard’s court by another trumpet playing wizard. Magic folk were really into brass instruments at one point.

  “Anyway, there are now restrictions on using magic for personal gain. All because of a trumpet. Silly really. The only thing the courts could do was outlaw certain books, start to destroy them and hope that people forgot the spells. It took three generations to phase it out!” Quin finally stopped talking. He was kneading at the chair cushion over and over. He lay down.

  “Before I forget, we do have a lot of the forbidden books here. No one knows about them really. I’m so tired, aren’t you? Well you had that big bike ride, but I have PTSD from the bag incident, stress can make you sleepy can’t it.” He closed his eyes and a smile was just about visible on his fuzzy face.

  “Quin!” I yelled. “Has someone stolen a forbidden book? Why are they still here if they are illegal? Can you see what is missing?” I had no idea that this library was up here, so I didn’t have a clue as to the inventory. There is a library of forbidden literature twenty feet above my bed, can I get in trouble for this if I didn’t know it was here?

  One cat eye slowly opened. Then both, he looked around the room.

  “Well your family never used the bad spells, but it seems a bit harsh to destroy any kind of book. That and your great-grandmother got really into organizing books by height on the shelves. It probably took her about five weeks to get it right and so having the justice department come in and raid the attic would have got it all messy. Not worth the hassle,” he said matter-of-factly.

  My family had knowingly hoarded illegal books just so that no one had to re-shuffle them back into an aesthetically pleasing height order. Is it too late to be adopted by some normal people?

  Quin walked around the room surveying the shelves. He was muttering to himself as he went.

  “Well that’s there, so that’s good. Phew, good job we didn’t lose that one. I haven’t read that one in years. Has that book always been fuchsia?”

  After a few minutes he walked back into the center of the room. He had something small and shiny dangling from his mouth, he dropped it on the floor near his feet.

  “Do you want the good news or the bad news?” he asked.

  “How bad is the bad news?”

  “Well, the good news is, none of the recipe books are missing. I was really scared for a minute, you know. I thought ‘What if all those fish pie recipes are gone?’ There are some mind-blowing ones for a pan roasted cod. Nora if you could smell what I am thinking right now…” he trailed off, lost in thought. Saliva was gathering at the edges of his mouth, the fur glistened with moisture.

  “The bad news though?” I pushed.

  “Oh, all the forbidden books are gone. We have totally been robbed. It’s a real problem, we can’t even call anyone because we shouldn’t have them in the first place. Ha, it’s kinda funny right? Like we have to go on a secret mission to retrieve them. Isn’t that a bit exciting? I think it will really shake up the week, because I truly had nothing else planned until next Wednesday.”

  I was overwhelmed. I had woken up this morning ready for a day of cycling with a gorgeous man and I had eaten dreamy cookies in a meadow with him. Now I stood in an attic library I hadn’t known existed until five minutes ago, surrounded by books I didn’t know I owned and was responsible for locating illegal books that I had never seen before. I couldn’t ask anyone for help.

  “I did find this though,” Quin said. He nudged the shiny object he had brought over. I crouched down to inspect it. My knees pressed into my chest as I squinted to see the detail on the earring. It was a silver color with lettering and a logo. It was a French ear wire style with a circular, ring pendant bearing the initials ‘AA’ following the curve at the top, and ‘Awa Antelopes’ at the bottom.

  The center of the pendant was a separately fixed circle that rotated within the ring. It was engraved with a cheerleader’s megaphone.

  “Quin, have you heard of ‘Awa Antelopes’ before?” I asked, hopefully.

  “No, but I have heard of the University of Awa. It’s about a thirty-minute drive from here. They’ve got a mix of wealthy witches and wizards with a few scholarships available for poorer kids that’ve just inherited magic young. The rich families have more money in their bloodline, more magic too. They acquire powers and fortune each generation. I think it all goes back to the thing I was telling you earlier. They used magic for personal gain before it was illegal and will reap the rewards for a very long time.” He looked at me knowingly, sensing my disgust with that idea.

  “So, do you think someone from the University broke in and stole the books?” I was now stood up with the earring held tightly. “We should go over there, speak with the teachers or something, right?”

  “Nora, I can’t stress enough, we should not have had these books in the first place. We can head over to the campus, sure. But we can’t go and report the situation to any type of authority. Some of the staff have connections within the justice department, you would be turned into a lizard faster than you can blink. Should we take some snacks for the ride?” He was already heading towards the attic hatch.

  I followed him down the steps as he listed off items that should be packed into my bag.

  “Quin, you only just ate, I’m not hungry and it will take us half an hour to get there. You will hardly starve. They will be back by now and we should hurry, I don’t know what they might do with all my family's stuff and they could tell someone what they found. We could get in real trouble. Yeah, you too. If I’m going down, you’re coming with me fur face.”

  He turned to me to feign shock, but I was taunting him with my tongue stuck out. He caved on the snack issue. We shouted to the kittens that we were leaving for the rest of the afternoon, but they were running about crashing into the walls so probably didn’t hear.

  I opened the front for Quin, grabbed my car keys from the table in the entry and closed the door behind me.

  “You want to go to a college full of young, cool people in sweaty cycling gear? That’s fine I guess but just don’t speak to me when we get there. I don’t want people thinking we know each other.” Quin was feeling sassy after all the adrenaline and snacks of his day so far.

  “I will change then, if that pleases you sir. Wait by the car, I won’t be long.”

  I ran back into the house, took off all my clothes in the closet upstairs and threw them into t
he hamper. I redressed in regular underwear; I didn’t need my butt to be padded for this adventure. On the bike however, the more padding the better.

  A white t-shirt with horizontal navy stripes and a pair of jeans later and I was good to go.

  My hair.

  I yanked the hair tie away from my head. I planned to have my ponytail cascade my luscious long hair down to just above my waist, but that didn’t happen. Sweat had glued my hair to my head. It was fixed in the ponytail position even without the hair tie. Urgh. In the bathroom I found myself spraying my roots with ‘dry shampoo for brunettes’ and roughing up my hair. Massaging the powder randomly through the hair hoping it would look semi-clean.

  After a few minutes of this my hair was passable. It didn’t look freshly washed by any means, but it was less disgusting. I washed the brown residue from my fingers, the dry shampoo was all over them, but luckily not on my shirt.

  I grabbed a plush winter coat from the coat stand on the way back out of the house. I made eye contact with Quin from the porch and pointed at myself, then raised both palms to the sky in a ‘Will this do?’ way. He nodded. How lucky I am to live with my very own Tim Gunn.

  The car heater had always blown cold air for the first five minutes of any winter drives. My stepdad had tried to explain that until the engine warmed up, or until I bought a nicer car, this would always be the case.

  Along with my powers, I had also inherited some money from my aunt Edith. It wasn’t a lottery win level of wealth, but I could comfortably live off it for a year or two if I kept up my frugal lifestyle. That meant not buying a new car.

  Fortunately, I had packed my wand. Since gaining my powers I had developed the ability to ‘assist’ my car with its struggles. When I had been run off the road by a murderous wizard, I was able to prize my car away from the tree it was wrapped around and get the engine started again, all without leaving the driver's seat.