"You'd do the same for me," he interrupted and grinned.
I could not help but smile at his attempt at humour.
"I suppose I would. Who would try to rape you, though? I mean, look at you."
He frowned at me, his expression affronted. "What do you mean? I'm God's gift to women and men, Skye."
I snorted. "I just meant you're...big. And kind of dangerous looking."
"Dangerously handsome, you mean," he responded arrogantly, making me giggle like a schoolgirl.
A beat of silence followed. I sighed and settled deeper in the sofa.
"I missed you," I told him softly. "I missed this."
He looked at me thoughtfully for some time. Then he grimaced and turned his back on me abruptly.
"What the fuck is Cole playing at?" he growled into the mattress. "I'm going to redden his ass for this."
His words sent a thrilling sensation throughout my body. "You...you'll spank him?" I asked. "Like a punishment?"
Jasper did not answer me at first and then his shoulders started shaking with laughter.
"God, Madison, you're really into this Daddy shit, aren't you? Get your mind off those dirty fantasies. I'm not into the whole dominant submissive thing. Cole and I...we just wing it. We do what feels good and sometimes it's fun, other times really intense. We don't have a label for our sex life or relationship."
"Oh." I furrowed my brow in thought. "But he said you pounded his ass when he pissed you off too much so I just thought..."
Jasper sat up and looked at me curiously. "How many lovers have you had?"
Suspicion tickled through me at his question. "What's that got to do with anything?"
He shook his head slightly, still with that curious expression. "No. I don't mean to be rude or anything. Just tell me. How many?"
I shifted uncomfortably on the couch. "Um...two," I offered hesitantly.
He raised his eyebrows. "Alright. So...did you ever have angry sex with your ex because I know Cole would never have sex when he's mad. His method of dealing with anger equals no sex. Unlike mine."
I shrugged. "I...it was just one time with my ex. When...when I...lost my virginity," I confessed in a whisper.
He stared at me. "You're kidding me, right?"
I grew indignant at his words. "Cole is extremely good in bed, as you very well know," I declared. "He more than makes up for what I have lacked all these years."
Jasper licked his lips and conceded my point with a nod. "I know, sweetheart but Cole is...well, you two are so much alike. There's more to sex than just sweet lovemaking. The thing is, Cole gets that extra push from me to be more...adventurous. Dirty. But...you're too sweet to ask for more," he told me frankly.
God, I needed a drink. Unfortunately, I knew exactly what he meant. Cole was amazing. He never failed to satisfy me and the sex was great. But it was all a little too sweet. Cole never got mad at me. He never treated me like a bad girl. He talked dirty and was into some occasional role playing but even then it was always moderated because I felt like he was too worried that I would break or something if he got too rough. And I did not have enough experience to push my boundaries. I liked what he did and refrained from asking for anything more. Jasper had a point but there was nothing I could do about it.
"Sex isn't everything, you know," I said because there was nothing else to say.
Jasper slowly laid back down on the bed. "I started to have fantasies about the three of us," he informed me calmly. "Right after the night you first shared our bed. Whenever Cole and I got it on, I started to wish you were there too. I had to stay away from you, Skye. I couldn't be your friend and maintain my control as well."
His confession floored me. So I was not the only one? With the threesome fantasies. What a relief! But then again, not so much.
"Do you think Cole ever has those kind of thoughts?"
He sighed heavily. "I don't know, honey. I'm afraid to ask. He's a sensitive little thing."
I laughed softly. "Yeah. He is. But I think he's onto us, Jasper." I paused and thought about it. "Or maybe he really does just want to be free of us for a night. I mean, poor guy has been going back and forth for a month. It must be hard sometimes when you simply need some alone time. We never really consider that, do we? That it must be challenging for him as well. But he loves us so much and does the best he can. Shit, now I want to apologise to him."
Jasper did not reply. Taking out his phone, he tapped at the screen, then held it to his ear.
"What're you doing?" I heard him ask.
He listened for a while and then said, "No, I was just calling to say goodnight. I love you. Sleep well."
He hung up and was startled when he saw me standing over him with a mutinous expression on my face. "How am I supposed to top that?" I glared at him and he smiled at me arrogantly.
"It's not a competition, you know," he drawled.
"Stop throwing my words back at me, Wells. And now that we've decided to give him the night off, where am I supposed to sleep?"
"On top of me," he replied flirtatiously. "You just said yourself I'm big. There's so much room for you over here." He patted his chest and I shook my head.
"I can't." Both my tone and expression were tortured and regretful.
He noted my struggle and probably felt sorry for me.
"I won't touch you," he said softly. "We'll put a pillow between us. I don't roll around much so you should be safe. Come on. We can do this. For Cole."
Grumbling, I climbed into the space he left for me and stiffly laid my head down on the one pillow. He wedged the other one between us and turned his back on me with his forearm tucked under his head.
This was not fair. It felt wretched. I couldn't touch him but was forced to sleep with him. At that moment, I wanted to redden Cole's ass myself for putting us in this horrible situation.
****
I woke up the next morning curled around Jasper's big body with his hand resting on the rump of my ass.
For a moment, I panicked thinking we had actually crossed some line in the slumber of sleep last night but I breathed a sigh of relief upon noting that we were both still fully dressed. To save me from temptation, Jasper had not even taken off his shirt in order to sleep comfortably.
I raised my head to look at his face and a wave of tenderness enveloped me. He did not look like an arrogant asshole in his sleep. And the way he held me, I felt so small and protected in his arms.
Looking at his firm lips made me want to kiss him so I rolled away, over the pillow barrier which I had breached and onto my side of the bed. I realised I was kind of wet. Probably because I had been subconsciously rubbing myself against Jasper's tree trunk of a thigh.
Cole. I needed Cole. I got out of bed and turned the door knob without remembering he had locked us in. But when it opened easily, something clicked in my brain.
Worry engulfed me at this discovery. It meant that sometime during the night, Cole had come to our room to unlock this door and he must have peeked inside. He must have seen me draped all over Jasper. Oh, Cole. Oh God, no.
How could I face him now? There was the evidence between my legs that I had been turned on by another man. How could I go to him now to satisfy the desire that Jasper had aroused in me?
I started to cry. I hated this so much. Crying came so easily to me and I had no idea what to do except let those tears fall as I stood in the doorway.
A hand clamped on my shoulder and then Jasper was there holding my head against his chest, wrapping his strong arms around me, whispering something comforting.
I pushed against him. "No," I whimpered. "No. I need Cole," I sobbed. "Please. I'm not...we can't-"
"Skye?"
I lifted my head when I heard Cole's voice. He was standing right next to us and instinctively, I pushed away from Jasper and threw my arms around my lover's neck.
"I'm sorry," I cried softly into his neck. "I didn't mean for it to happen, Cole. I love you! I love you so much and I would never hurt
you like that but...I...I love Jasper too. I can't stop feeling this way. I'm sorry. I know I don't deserve you. Please, please don't hate me."
I don't know how long I babbled on like that and he just stood there, still listening to me with his arms around me. After a long moment, I had to pull away and face him though.
That was when I saw his tears and everything crumbled.
"Cole?"
He smiled at me tightly even through the pain and then his gaze shifted to Jasper who had not moved away from us all this time.
Then he laughed a little, except it sounded so bitter.
"I fucked everything up, huh?" I whispered into the awkward silence.
Cole was still looking at Jasper with a shrewd gaze.
"At least she was brave enough and honest enough to tell me what she felt," Cole finally spoke up. "What about you, Wells? Is this just a one-sided thing or you have feelings for Skye too?"
Jasper's fists were clenched, his jaw tight and his eyes so turbulent. For a moment, I thought he would deny that he felt attracted to me but then his words shook my world.
"I never would have acted on my feelings," he said determinedly. "Even if it killed me a little every day knowing I couldn't have her. I would have died that little death happily for you, Cole." He blinked back tears and buried his fingers in his hair, looking frustrated. "I would never hurt you and neither would she. For God's sake, we spent the entire night alone and we never touched each other."
Cole sucked his bottom lip through his teeth and then blew out a breath. Then he turned to me and said, "I can't blame either of you. Hell, I fell for you when I thought I could never want anyone else after Jasper. This is probably karma."
I was horrified by his words. "Please don't say that."
He shook his head. "I suspected you two had something going on but I didn't realise it was this serious. Fuck. I can't just ignore this, Skye. We're all living together."
More tears fell down my cheeks and I nodded, looking at my feet. "I'll leave," I told him quietly, my heart being crushed within the confines of my chest.
"No!" Jasper and Cole snapped at the same time and then we all looked at each other in shock.
"She's not leaving," Jasper stated again in a firm, no-nonsense tone.
"Jasper," I said in exasperation. He was not helping the situation at all with his possessive Daddy vibes.
"Of course she isn't," Cole said with a frown.
I inhaled sharply. "You can't make Jasper leave."
Cole raised an eyebrow at me. "I have an idea. Why don't I leave and the two of you can stay together?" he suggested glibly.
Jasper shoved him in the chest once, his expression angry. "What the fuck did you say? You want to leave? You just try it, buddy. Try it and see what I do to you."
A strange thing happened then. Cole's lips curved into a small smile. He rubbed a hand over his face and shook his head at Jasper in amusement.
"This is weird. Skye, what do you think about all this? Can you handle the fact that two men want to be with you?"
I stared at him in shock. Was he for real right now? He wanted to know what I thought about a throuple relationship? Frankly, it scared the hell out of me. Cole laughed at my expression. Was he going mad? Breaking down from all the information dump which had just occurred?
"God, she barely knows what to do with me sometimes," Cole said to Jasper. "You're just going to scare the shit out of her."
Jasper frowned at Cole, searching his partner's face for clues before his gaze shifted to me. We looked at each other as if we were entranced. Under some kind of dark, forbidden spell. What is Cole talking about? I can totally handle Jasper.
The thought made me blush guiltily and I averted my eyes.
"You're being ridiculous, Cole," I mumbled. "This won't work. I don't want to make things worse."
"Skye, there is no other way," Cole said in a pained voice. "Believe it or not, by some miracle we all love each other. None of us want to leave. We can't control our emotions. What do you suggest? I know you're not experienced enough and I never wanted this to happen. I never imagined this asshole over here could actually grow to care for you. But he does and yet, neither of you cheated on me." He sighed and took my hand. "Maybe I won't be able to come to terms with this ever when I watch the two people I'm most possessive about grow close to each other but...I have to try. I will try because you both learned to share me. I can't be selfish anymore. But I don't want to force you into this. It's up to you. We'll leave you alone to think about it."
He placed his finger under my chin and made me look him in the eyes. "Stop crying for fuck's sake. You didn't do anything wrong. If you want to be with Jasper too, we'll make it work. You said you trusted me, right? Trust me now. I'm with you."
~~~
Chapter 26
Cole
I was lying in bed an hour later, unable to bring myself to go down and eat breakfast even though Skye's friend, Olivia had hollered about a dozen times now.
I felt so depressed. Attraction and some feelings were totally understandable between two hot people who lived together but they went and fell in fucking love??? I left them alone to sort out their issues and they had a revelation instead?
That was kind of funny and devastating at the same time. Jasper. I had never expected it from Jasper. He had seemed to hate her even if he tried to hide it from me at first. Skye got emotional more easily and she had never resented Jasper from the beginning since he was there first and she understood that. My sweet Skye. And my Jasper.
Now I had to share them.
Jesus, why was I such a selfish bastard? They did the same for me, right? They watched me be with the other person on a daily basis. Jasper sacrificed so much for me. Compromised so much. Skye gave me everything I wished for in a woman. The thought of losing her killed me and losing Jasper was completely out of the question.
So I had to make the best out of a bad situation. I had to learn to give more and take less. It was time for me to sacrifice something for those two. They spoiled me too much, anyway. I had to learn to grow up now. A tear rolled down my cheek. Old insecurities sprang up from never having had a family of my own. Giving up something that belonged only to me was hard for me. It had always been my weakest point.
I thought about the way Skye had cried in my arms because she felt so bad about her conflicting emotions and the whole time my eyes had stayed on Jasper who looked as though he wanted to snatch her from me and protect her from her own pain but for my sake, he stayed his arms.
Fuck.
I had never felt this kind of raw emotion in my life like I felt for the two of them.
"Damn it, Cole, I can't see you like this," Jasper's gruff voice intruded upon my thoughts. "I'm so fucking sorry about Skye. I didn't even realise when I started to-"
"Been there. Done that," I told him carelessly. "Welcome to my world, baby."
He exhaled roughly and moved to sit beside me on the bed, burying his face in his hands.
I glanced over at him. So close. So tortured. My love.
My hand crept out to caress his broad back. "Tell me it gets better. That you get used to seeing the person you love be with somebody else," I begged him softly because I did not trust myself to be able to do this without losing my shit. Was I even strong enough? Selfless enough?
Jasper let out another breath and straightened. "It only got better for me when I started to care for her too. The day before I left for London. I didn't resent her anymore or feel angry when I saw you with her. In fact, I started to want that," he finished in a whisper.
I sighed. "Okay. That helps. But I swear to God, Jasper, if you scare her away-"
"Why do you keep saying that?" he erupted suddenly.
"Because she isn't very experienced and she's...Jasper she's just so fucking honest and emotional, I don't know if she can handle your brand of sex."
He choked upon hearing my words and got to his feet. "You coddle her too much," he snapped at me. "She's n
ot fragile, Cole. And it's not like I'm some kind of savage. You're just being a jealous prick. And there's no need to be because you're just as important to me."
I fell quiet after that, pondering upon his words. I did feel jealous. And kind of sick. Shit, is this what I caused Jasper to go through when I told him about Skye? It felt like hell.
"I need an asprin," I moaned and turned to bury my face into the pillow.
Jasper huffed. "Drama queen," he muttered but I heard him go into the bathroom to look for some anyway.
Three's A Crowd Page 14
