Holding Mia

by Terri Anne Browning

  We were both quiet for a minute before I realized what I had to do. “I have to tell her.”

  A cocktail of fear and hope mixed in his eyes. “She won’t want to know me.”

  “Yes, I’m very sure she will. This is going to be a huge shock to her, though. I don’t even know if she remembers you. My dad met her when she was only five. Before that, if she has any memories of that time, she never speaks of them. I think it’s too much for her. Remembering the abuse her mother would inflict on her.”

  Pain flashed over his wrinkled face. “My poor Emmie.”

  “Mia!”

  I went still at the sound of Barrick roaring my name. Groaning, I backed away from Eddie. “I have to go. But… She will be here Monday. May I bring her to see you?”

  He nodded eagerly, even as the fear won out in his eyes. “I would like that.”

  I gave him a small smile and opened the door. Making sure to close it behind me, I rushed down the hall. Barrick stood half inside the ladies’ room. “Mia?”

  “I’m here,” I called out to him, out of breath because my heart was still pounding after what had just happened.

  He snapped his head around, and relief washed over his face before he was scooping me up and holding me against him. “Are you okay?” he rasped out, half crushing me against him. “You’re so pale.”

  “I…” Tears spilled over my lashes. “I want to go home.”

  Touching his lips to my forehead, he started walking out of the bar. “What happened?” he demanded once we were outside.

  “The craziest thing,” I told him, feeling emotionally drained all of a sudden.

  Putting me in the passenger seat of his Jeep, he bent so he could see me. “You’re scaring me.”

  Gulping, I told him everything that had happened in a rush, and his eyes widened more and more with every word out of my mouth. A couple times, he glanced back at the bar, but only for a second before his eyes were back on me, scanning over me from head to toe, as if he were looking for any signs I’d been physically harmed.

  “Jameson’s has been here since before I was born,” he muttered when I was finished. “It’s an icon. My parents met here, for Christ’s sake. How did you end up here, of all places?”

  “I-I don’t know.” I shivered, and he pulled off his jacket. Wrapping it around me even though I was already double-layered, he rubbed my arms to keep me warm. “Maybe it was just meant to be?”

  Maybe one of those gods had finally listened.

  Chapter 24

  Mia

  I didn’t call my mother as soon as I got home with what I’d learned. Instinctively, I knew it would freak her out and send her into a tailspin. Momma’s younger years were so nightmarish that once she’d created a better life, changes of large magnitude terrified her.

  What I had to share with her was as life-changing as it came.

  For the rest of the weekend, I worried about how she would react once I did tell her, and I tried to plan out how I would break the news to her. When Monday, my birthday, dawned, I was so stressed over it that I only wanted to hide in bed with Barrick all day and skip dinner with my family.

  Their flight was delayed, so Momma called and told us just to meet them at the restaurant. Braxton and Lyla—whom I’d made up with the day before—tagged along, but they could tell I wasn’t completely in the present as Barrick drove us to dinner.

  Barrick kept his hand linked with mine, feeding me his strength as we walked into what had become my favorite place to eat since starting college.

  I was so consumed with how to handle the whole Eddie thing, I’d forgotten about not wanting to see my own dad. When I spotted him in the back of the restaurant, my heart clenched, and I ached to have our old relationship back. Maybe if things were better between us, I could have called him and asked for his help telling Momma I’d met her long-lost father.

  My mom jumped to her feet as soon as she caught sight of us and practically skipped through the tables in her happiness to see me. As soon as she was within touching distance, I wrapped my arms around her in a tight hug. Closing my eyes, I inhaled deeply, and I felt her doing the same.

  “I know it’s only been a little over a week since I last saw you,” she said with a shaky little laugh. “But I’ve missed you so much.”

  “I missed you too,” I whispered.

  When the hug continued longer than it should have, Barrick nudged me, letting me know I needed to release my mom so she could breathe. Stepping back, I gave her a smile that trembled. “How was your flight?”

  “Bumpy. There were storms all across the Midwest,” she complained. She greeted my friends and Barrick, then linked her arm through mine. “Are you ready to face your dad? He’s practically shaking in his boots because he’s so worried about how this is going to go.”

  “Yeah,” I muttered hesitantly. “Can’t wait.”

  “Please, try to be nice.”

  Walking beside her, I promised I would try.

  Dad stood as we approached, and I wanted to drag my feet and make him wait. Or better yet, turn and walk away. But then I saw tears fill his eyes, and my heart started to sob. With a whimper, I threw myself into his arms.

  Daddy trembled as he enfolded me in a hug. “I’m sorry, baby girl. So damn sorry.”

  Clenching my eyes shut, I nodded. “I know.”

  “Can you forgive me?” he asked hopefully.

  “I’m really trying,” I told him honestly. But I didn’t know if the unwavering trust I’d once had in him would ever be the same again.

  His sigh sounded pained when it hit my ears. “I’ll take that for now, I guess.” Releasing me, he stepped back and gave me a grim smile. “You look beautiful, sweetheart. Happy birthday.”

  “Thanks, Daddy.” Turning, I waved my arm at my friends. “You know Braxton. And this is Lyla. She was my roommate at the dorm.”

  Lyla stepped forward, shaking Daddy’s hand. “Nice to meet you, sir.”

  “So, you were the other security operative.” He gave her a quick, clinical appraisal from head to toe. “Somehow, I thought you would have more muscles.”

  “You were expecting a Ronda Rousey look-alike,” she amended for him, not the least bit offended. “I get that all the time. But trust me, Mr. Armstrong, I’m more than capable of protecting myself and anyone else.”

  Remembering what she’d done to Gwen, I didn’t doubt her even for a second.

  Barrick put his arm around my waist, pulling Daddy’s attention to him, and he grinned. “Good to see you, Barrick,” he greeted, shaking my boyfriend’s hand.

  “Sir.”

  “Let’s sit down,” Momma suggested, pulling me into the chair right beside hers.

  Barrick took the one on the other side of me, while Lyla sat closest to my dad, leaving Braxton between his cousins.

  “I’m starving,” Daddy said, glancing around for the waiter. “The food on the plane left a lot to be desired.”

  “I hate airplane food,” Lyla agreed. “I got food poisoning from it once, and I refuse to eat it now.”

  While the two of them talked about the evils of plane food, I went over what I wanted to say to Momma again in my head. It was the feel of Barrick’s fingers skimming down my jaw that pulled me back to the present.

  “It’s going to be okay, firecracker,” he murmured softly against my ear. “I’m right here. You can tell her.”

  “You two are just too cute for words,” Momma said with a happy sigh. “I’m so glad you’re happy, Mia.”

  Then her gaze went to Barrick, and her eyes got a dangerous glint in them. “Now I don’t have to destroy you, boy.”

  I bit my lip, fighting a grin despite my anxiety over Eddie.

  “Yes, ma’am.”

  I waited until after we’d ordered food before I finally forced myself to say what needed to be said. Barrick had already told Braxton and Lyla to make themselves scarce for a little while so I could talk to m
y parents about something. When he gave them a look, the two mumbled something about making phone calls and needing the bathroom.

  When Barrick started to stand too, I grabbed his hand. Our gazes locked, and I begged him with my eyes not to leave me. He gave me an encouraging smile and kissed my lips, staying by my side where I needed him the most.

  “Momma.” My voice squeaked when I spoke, and I hurriedly cleared it before continuing. “Remember I told you I was at Jameson’s the other night?”

  Her shoulders stiffened, and she gave me a tight smile. “Did you get drunk after all?”

  “No. I met your father.”

  Daddy was just taking a drink of his Coke when I said it, and it sprayed across the table between us in his surprise. “What did you say?” he wheezed, before coughing.

  Momma just sat there, staring at me without a single flicker of surprise across her beautiful face.

  “Momma?”

  “Eddie Jameson…” She said his name, then shook her head. “I hadn’t heard his name since I was a little girl until Saturday night.”

  “Then you do remember him?” I asked carefully.

  “My mother would sometimes curse someone named Eddie when she coming down off something strong, and a few times, she would tell me I looked so much like Eddie Jameson, she couldn’t stand to look at me.” She shrugged, as if remembering her mother and her fucked-up childhood was no big deal. But I could see that the past haunted her in those eyes that mirrored her father’s.

  “Em.” Daddy covered her hand where it was clenched on the table between them. “You never told me you had a dad. I thought maybe your mom didn’t know who he was.”

  “No, they were married. I found their marriage certificate after she died. I thought about looking for him a few times over the years, but…”

  But she was afraid.

  Scared he would take her away from the Demons.

  Afraid he would be just like her mother.

  Momma didn’t have to voice those fears for me to understand what she must have been thinking.

  “Do you want to meet him now?” I asked slowly. “When your mom ran off with you, he looked everywhere for you. He even called the police, but no one would help find you. It was only when you went to live with Daddy and the other Demons that he knew you were okay because you were suddenly everywhere in entertainment news.”

  “He didn’t want to take me away from them?” she asked, and her face was unreadable. I hated when she did that. Closed herself off so no one, not even Daddy, could tell what she was thinking.

  “He said he did, but he saw how happy you were. Actually, he was afraid you would hate him if he tried to take you away from Uncle Jesse since he was your guardian. And he thought your mom had turned you against him. He—”

  She lifted her hand, cutting me off before I could tell her more. “Mia, baby, do you mind if we table this conversation until later? I… It’s a lot to take in. Give me a little time to digest it all.”

  “I’m sorry.” I rushed to apologize, blinking back a tide of tears. “I didn’t know how to tell you, and I know I’m handling this all wrong. But I couldn’t not tell you, Momma.”

  She gave me a tiny smile. “I know, sweetheart. And I appreciate you being so forthcoming. I just need a little bit to wrap my head around this.”

  Daddy cleared his throat. “Just give her a few days, Mia. We’re going to be here for a couple days anyway. If Nevaeh is coming here in the spring, we figured you two would like to share an apartment instead of having to deal with dorm life.”

  Barrick tensed beside me, letting me know really quickly he didn’t like that idea at all. My parents didn’t know I was living with Barrick. Not the first time I’d been staying at his place, and not this time now that it was official.

  “We have an extra room,” Braxton announced as he retook his seat. He must have been watching and waiting to rejoin us. “Wouldn’t you feel better, sir, if the girls lived with us? We could watch out for them, and the house is only a few blocks from campus.”

  I gaped at him. Only the week before, he’d told me to convince Nevaeh not to enroll. Now he was doing a complete 180 and was suggesting she live under the same roof with him? Something was definitely going on with him, and I had no idea how to get it out of him.

  Momma and Daddy shared a look that was an entire unspoken conversation. After a minute, Daddy nodded. “I’ll speak to Drake and Lana about it. I’m sure it wouldn’t be a problem. That is, if you two don’t mind having two teenage girls under the same roof with you?”

  Barrick was already shaking his head. “I don’t mind at all. Actually, I would prefer it. Mia and her cousin would be safer with us than in an apartment or at the dorms.”

  “Yeah, but Nev is a little…” Daddy pressed his lips together, searching for the right word to describe his niece. “She’s different.”

  “I like her different,” Braxton told him, his jaw clenching. “I promise to watch over her and make sure she’s safe and happy.”

  That seemed to soothe whatever fears my dad had, but Momma was watching Braxton closer all of a sudden. Lyla returned to the table, taking her seat and finally pulling Momma’s gaze from him.

  Smiling, Momma gave in. “I’ll arrange it, then. After her whole New York debacle last weekend, I know Drake will rest a little easier knowing you boys will be around to keep Nevaeh out of trouble.”

  “What debacle?” I asked.

  “What happened? Is she okay?” Braxton demanded at the same time.

  Momma held up her hands, trying to calm us both, but even from where I was sitting, I could feel how tense my friend was. “It’s fine. Nev had a little run-in at the event she went to with Cole last Saturday night. I’m not completely sure what happened, and Nev isn’t talking about it. Cole punched out some guy, though, and Neveah was crying when she called her mom. Lana called me, and I flew back to New York to take care of her, but by then, she was tight-lipped. She hasn’t talked much at all since then, actually.”

  “Mia, give me your phone.” The desperation in Braxton’s voice had me shoving it into his hand.

  Unsteadily, he got to his feet, already trying to unlock my phone. “Mia,” he growled, and I quickly unlocked it for him.

  The waiter was just arriving with our food, and Braxton bumped into him as he limped quickly toward the door. Putting the phone to his ear with one hand, he thrust his other through his hair.

  “What was that about?” Daddy asked, frowning after him.

  “He’s just worried,” I excused, watching my friend with concerned eyes. “He’s got a soft spot for Nevaeh.”

  But I had a feeling it was a lot more than that.

  Epilogue

  Barrick

  The front door opened, and Mia walked in, tossing her bag onto the coffee table and kicking off her shoes before cuddling up beside me on the couch. I turned down the TV, holding her against me, and savored the moment.

  Lyla had started giving Mia a ride home from work every Tuesday since she was picking up Josie anyway, but I’d still been on edge all evening while she was at the dance studio. It was like that whenever she wasn’t with me. This burning in my chest and gut only ever eased when she was close enough for me to touch.

  “How was work?” I asked, kissing her forehead.

  She melted against me, closing her eyes. “Good. Recital practice is going better than I anticipated with all those littles so easily distracted. And Josie is becoming my little star.”

  “That’s good, babe. Glad you’re enjoying your job so much.”

  “Me too,” she said, fighting back a yawn.

  “Ready for bed?”

  She shook her head, complaining it was too early. I hid a grin, knowing she would be asleep on me within ten minutes. I settled back, getting comfortable, because I wasn’t about to move her once she did.

  Before the end of the show I was watching, she was already out for the count, and I k
issed the top of her head before texting Braxton to bring me her throw off the chair in our room. A minute later, he walked into the living room and draped the soft blanket over her before sitting on the other end of the couch to watch the basketball game with me that came on after the show.

  “Next week is Thanksgiving,” he commented during a commercial.

  “I’m aware,” I said quietly, trying not to disturb Mia.

  “Is she going home to spend it with her family?” he asked, and I gritted my teeth.

  “This is her home,” I muttered, trying my best not to growl and wake her up.

  “You know what I mean,” Braxton said with a sigh. “Is she going to California for the holiday or not?”

  “Not,” Mia surprised us both by answering him. Lifting her head, she yawned and stretched. “And before you ask, yes, I’m going home for a few days for Christmas, but I was hoping you two bozos would come home with me for that. Unless you already have plans.”

  “I’m coming,” I told her without hesitation. “Where you go, I follow.”

  She gave me that happy little smile I always wanted to grace those lips.

  “I’d rather be with you guys than deal with my parents anyway,” Braxton told her casually, but he wasn’t fooling me.

  I knew he’d rather be with Mia than anyone. It should have made me jealous as fuck, and there were times it did. But mostly, I was just happy that my cousin had someone he could rely on and wanted to spend time with, rather than locked in his room brooding about the loss of his leg and letting the memories torture him.

  “Yay! I’ll let Momma know to get an extra room ready.” She kissed my cheek then hugged Braxton.

  With a growl, I scooped her up and dropped her into my lap. Laughing, she stroked her fingers through my beard, pausing only long enough to poke at my dimples. “Be good,” she gently scolded me.

  Braxton’s phone rang, and he picked it up off the arm of the couch. Whoever it was had him standing, calling a goodnight over his shoulder before lifting the phone to his ear.