Win Some, Lose Some

by Shay Savage

  “Cake goes with anything,” I said with a shrug. Mayra smiled and glanced up at me through her lashes. I looked away quickly, feeling heat in my neck and cheeks. “I mean, cake is so good, it doesn’t matter what else you have with it.”

  We finished dinner, cleaned up, and then Mayra let me have a piece of the chocolate cake she had made, which was elaborately decorated with all kinds of frosting and read Congratulations, Graduate on it.

  “I felt bad you didn’t get your diploma with the rest of us,” Mayra told me, “and the party was kind of a disaster. I thought we could finally celebrate our graduation a little.”

  In all honesty, it hadn’t been important to me in the slightest. I didn’t care about walking across a stage with everyone else or even that I got my diploma in the mail instead of having it handed to me by Principal Monroe. I almost told her this, but then I realized she had gone to a lot of trouble to decorate the cake to celebrate with me. When I looked up at her face, I could see the smallest amount of worry there.

  Celebrating is important to Mayra.

  This realization, and the subsequent realization that Mayra wanted to celebrate my graduation, not just her own, shocked me and nearly made me have to sit down on the couch for a few minutes. It was as if something inside my head suddenly switched to the on position, and it sent a shiver of electricity down my backbone.

  Even when my mother and father were alive and would do things for me, I never grasped the concept of wanting something on behalf of another person. I didn’t have the kinds of thoughts where you forgot about what was important to you and only focused on what was important to someone else. My doctors in the past had talked about it, but I never really understood what they meant. How could I feel like that about someone else?

  But I did now. Now I understood. With wide eyes, I reached out and pulled Mayra against me, my mouth covering hers and molding against her lips softly.

  “Thank you,” I whispered. “Thank you so much, Mayra…you have no idea what this means.”

  “Matthew”—Mayra snickered and wound her fingers into my hair—“it’s just a cake.”

  The sparkle in her eyes told me differently.

  “No,” I said with a shake of my head, “it’s not. It’s not the cake. It’s you. It’s all you. You are everything to me and more. That doesn’t even make sense, but it’s true.”

  The cascade of emotions that poured over me all at once wasn’t overwhelming like I might have expected. It was invigorating. Revitalizing. Exciting. Captivating.

  Erotic.

  They were the purest feelings I had ever experienced.

  I reached down and lifted Mayra up into my arms, cradling her against my chest. I looked into her eyes and watched her look back at me. For once, there was no anxiety—no strangeness as our souls connected through our gaze. When she reached up and trailed her hand over my cheek, I didn’t move, tense, or flinch. I just stared into her eyes, wanting to figure out how I could possibly express to her what she meant to me.

  “I love you,” I told her.

  “I love you, too,” she replied.

  Words weren’t enough. They weren’t even close. I shook my head slowly, still keeping my eyes on hers.

  “I want to show you.”

  “Show me?”

  My mouth pressed to hers, and I used the tip of my tongue to reach out and touch her lip.

  “I want to show you,” I said again. “I want to show you how much I love you.”

  I couldn’t wait another second, so I carried her up to my room.

  Mayra, lying down on her back in my bed, was the most beautiful sight I had ever seen. Her eyes were bright, and they never left mine as I leaned back long enough to pull my shirt over my head. Mayra reached up and ran the tips of her fingers over my chest and stomach before quickly unbuttoning her blouse and pulling it from her shoulders.

  I knelt, straddling her with each of my knees lined up with her waist as Mayra reached behind her back and released the clasp of her bra. Before she could remove it completely, I touched the shoulder straps with my fingers. I trailed down her shoulders and brushed my fingertip over her fish-shaped birthmark and then leaned down to place my lips over it.

  “Why do you do that?” Mayra asked quietly.

  I looked at her and saw nothing but curiosity in her eyes. I blinked a couple of times as I tried to figure it out myself.

  “It’s part of you,” I said, “a mark of your birth, which makes it important.”

  Mayra raised an eyebrow.

  “Also,” I said as I smiled sheepishly, “it is very, very distracting until I touch it.”

  “And it looks like a fish.” Mayra snickered.

  I nodded.

  Mayra’s hands cupped the side of my face, and she brought our lips together for a moment.

  “You’re adorable.”

  I shrugged, felt my face heat up a little, but was then distracted by the exposure of the tops of her breasts and forgot to be embarrassed by any of it. Instead, I kissed them both as I pulled her bra away.

  The feelings I experienced in the kitchen hadn’t dissipated. If anything, the emotions increased as Mayra’s clothing began to disappear. I knelt above her again as she shifted under me to unbutton and unzip her shorts. I watched her thumbs hook into the sides as she pushed them down over her hips and felt my cock respond to the sight.

  Would she also get excited from watching me?

  Again, I knelt over her. I watched her eyes follow my hand as I moved it over my stomach and to the buttons of my jeans. I popped the first one open, then the second, and immediately saw Mayra’s eyes widen as she ran her tongue across her lips.

  “Do you like that?” I asked her. My voice had taken on a strange, husky tone. I swallowed once, and then opened another button. “Do you like watching me?”

  “Shit, Matthew…”

  Her chest rose and fell, and she didn’t have to say any more. I pulled the final button through the loop and pushed my jeans slightly off my hips—just enough to reach in and pull my cock out of my boxers. Mayra let out a long breath as she reached for me. I took her hand in mine and wrapped her fingers around my shaft.

  She stroked me as I pushed my jeans and boxers off, only letting go so I could shift them the rest of the way down my legs. We finished by removing her panties together and then spent a moment just looking at each other.

  “You’re so beautiful,” I told her as I reached out and ran my fingers over her neck and chest and then down to her stomach. My hand dropped lower, cupping her and using my thumb to stroke over her clit, just like she had taught me.

  “And you are incredible,” she replied. “Everything about you just…surprises me.”

  “Is that good?”

  “Definitely.”

  “Are you, uh…”—I had to stop and swallow hard to keep speaking—“…are you ready?”

  “Yes,” she said, her voice dropping in tone as her cheeks darkened. “Please.”

  I reached over and opened the top nightstand drawer, pulling out the string of condoms and wondering why I hadn’t detached them all beforehand.

  “Prepared for a long night?” Mayra chuckled.

  “Most definitely,” I replied. I pulled one of the little squares away from the rest and held it up for Mayra to see the wording on the package.

  “I hope these are okay,” I said softly. Mayra just nodded.

  “Do you know how to put one on?” she asked.

  “I think so,” I said. “I did a little…um…internet research on it this afternoon.”

  I decided not to tell her about practicing on the bananas.

  Holding the tipped end of the condom, I placed it over the head and then rolled it down. It got kind of caught up at one point but otherwise seemed to go on without much trouble. It felt a little strange and kind of confining, but I was a little too preoccupied with what was coming next to care too much.

  “Are you ready?” I asked. “I mean…really ready?”

&
nbsp; “I’m ready,” Mayra responded. “Are you?”

  “Yes.” I meant it, too. I didn’t have the slightest doubt.

  Mayra nodded, and I saw her bottom lip disappear beneath her teeth as I positioned myself between her legs, took a deep breath, and shifted my hips forward.

  Not much happened.

  “Here…” Mayra reached down and repositioned me a bit, and I moved forward again with about the same amount of luck.

  I closed my eyes, trying to stop my mind from spinning into the terrifying circles of self-fulfilling prophecy.

  Mayra moved around a little under me, pulling her legs up and bending her knees so they were right up against my hips.

  “Try again,” she said. Her fingers were still wrapped around me, and I moved with her guidance. Once the head was pressed against her opening, Mayra released me and reached up to grip my shoulders. This time when I moved forward, I felt her body spread and give in to the pressure.

  For the briefest moment, it felt like there wasn’t enough room for me to get inside of her, but when I pushed just a little harder, that pressure was gone, and my cock sank into her partway as Mayra gasped and dug her fingernails into my skin.

  “Are you okay?” I asked through panting breaths. My mind warred between the feeling of her tight body gripping half my dick and the pain of her nails in my flesh.

  “Yes.” She was panting, and her eyes squeezed shut for a minute.

  “Are you sure?”

  “Just…give me a second.”

  I held completely still, watching Mayra’s face as she moved slowly under me, adjusting her position for a moment before lying back against the bed and sighing.

  “I hurt you,” I said softly.

  “No,” she said, “you didn’t. It feels…strange…but it doesn’t hurt now. Just for a second.”

  “You’re okay?”

  “Yes,” she said. Her hips shifted, which sent some pretty interesting feelings up my cock, into my balls, and then right up my spine. I groaned, arching my back a little, as she moved again.

  “You like that?” she asked. Her expression was one of awe and amusement combined.

  “Yes,” I answered. “It’s different…I like it. I like it a lot.”

  “Are you”—she paused a minute, her face tingeing red again—“all the way in?”

  I looked down and shook my head.

  “Not yet.”

  “Keep going.”

  “Okay.”

  I pulled out a short way and then pushed forward again. She tightened her fingers on my shoulders but didn’t dig in. Another nod from her, and I pushed a little harder, feeling myself become flush with her, all the way in.

  All the way.

  Much like when her hand was around me the first time, I couldn’t think of anything else but the sensation, no matter how hard I tried. I wanted to think about website design, past school projects, the weather—anything but this feeling of her warm, tight, wet flesh encompassing the most sensitive part of my body. I couldn’t, and I had to pull out.

  “What’s wrong?” Mayra asked.

  “Too much,” I said. “Feels too good. I don’t want to…not too soon. Just give me a sec.”

  Mayra stayed still, patiently waiting for me, which was one of the best things about her. It only took a minute before I could breathe easily again and was ready for another try. I didn’t need help lining up this time, and when I pushed inside of her, my cock slid in easily.

  “Oh, wow.” Mayra sighed.

  “Okay?”

  “More than,” she replied. “Really good. I think that little break was good for us both...oh wow…”

  I moved again, pulling a little less than halfway out before pushing back in. Mayra’s legs gripped my hips and she pushed up to meet me.

  “Is that good?” I asked.

  “Perfect,” she whispered. She closed her eyes and tilted her head back as I pulled back and thrust forward again. She wrapped her feet around my legs and steadied me. One of my hands went to her head, stroking through her hair as I stroked into her body lower down.

  We moved together, slowly and rhythmically, with the tempo set by nothing more than the beating of our hearts. I gasped each time I drove down inside of her—feeling the warmth and tightness of her body surrounding, enveloping, and holding me closely…safely. Her arms were wrapped around my shoulders, and her fingers dug into my skin. My hand gripped her hip.

  In my fingers, I could feel the gentle push of her hips off the mattress, and I used my hand to pull her against me at the same speed. It perfected our motions, and I could feel the slight quivering in her thighs as she panted against my neck.

  “Matthew…I’m…I’m…”

  I could feel it.

  Her heels dug into the back of my thighs, and it probably should have been painful but wasn’t. I felt her body shudder from the inside out, and it was the most incredible sensation I had ever experienced. My hand cupped the back of her neck as I held her up to me to kiss her jaw, her mouth, her cheek.

  There was wetness there just below her eye, and when I looked at her, I didn’t have to wonder or ask why she had tears—I knew. They were mirrored on my own cheeks.

  I didn’t look away when our eyes met, and I didn’t turn from her when her hand brushed the moisture away from my cheekbone. Our gaze remained connected. I should have felt uncomfortable, but I couldn’t bring myself to look away at all. My heart beat faster, and I moved inside of her quickly and with more urgency than before. I could feel every part of her muscles constricting around me as I thrust deeper, listening to her muted grunts each time I was completely buried inside.

  The buildup was more gradual than it had been when her hand was wrapped around me but a thousand times more intense, too. I dropped my cheek to Mayra’s neck, and her arms coiled around my head. My body seemed to be on autopilot as the pace increased along with the beat of my heart and the breath from my lungs. I was fully aware of the tingling shudder that came up from my thighs and down from my stomach, reaching a point in the center before exploding outwards.

  I cried out against the skin of her throat, my final thrust held tightly against her until my body stopped quaking inside of her. Twice more I move inside her flesh, my sanctuary, before reaching down and gripping the edge of the condom and pulling out of her. I discarded it in the basket beside the nightstand and then wrapped her up in my arms. With the scent and warmth of her surrounding me again, I closed my eyes and held her against my chest.

  “I love you,” Mayra whispered into my ear. I moved my mouth to her lips though I didn’t open my eyes. I just kissed her, murmuring the words back into her mouth as she did the same into mine. I pressed every inch of my body against hers, both hungry for more and completely sated at the same time.

  “I love you…I love you…” we repeated in unison between kisses.

  I couldn’t imagine anything else could be closer to bliss, so I gave in to the warmth of her love.

  Best win ever.

  Chapter 19—You Have What in Your Kitchen Drawer?

  Still warm and dazed from sleep, I opened my eyes to the dim light coming through my bedroom window. There were no thoughts of having dreamed the experiences of the night before—they were far too extraordinary to be passed off as nothing more than a dream.

  Mayra was in my arms, and I was in hers.

  When I turned my head slightly, I could see her closed eyes and peaceful look. I was immediately reminded of the first time we fell asleep in each other’s arms, right after I had told her everything about what was wrong with me and about my parents’ deaths. Even then, when I barely knew her, I knew how right it felt to be lying with her, our bodies twined together like the cover of some cheesy romance novel. I didn’t understand it then, but I did now.

  Shifting a little, I realized the arm tucked underneath Mayra’s torso was pretty much numb. I tightened my fingers into a fist a couple of times to get the tingling sensation to go away but didn’t bother letting go of h
er. I’d take the pins and needles. They weren’t all that bad as long as I could stay like this and look at her.

  I watched her sleep, completely fascinated by the slight flutter of her eyelids, her slow, rhythmic breathing, and the tiny murmured words I couldn’t quite make out. The sun brightened the room, and when her eyes opened, they met mine. She smiled immediately, and I felt my heart begin to pound.

  “Hi,” Mayra said, and then she giggled and blushed.

  I glanced away, feeling my own cheeks heat up. Flashes from the previous night scurried through my head—the feeling of being inside of her, the look on her face during orgasm, and the glory of falling asleep afterwards with her in my bed.

  “Hi,” I finally repeated. I couldn’t bring myself to look back into her eyes again. Even when I tried, I had to look away pretty quickly. Apparently, whatever had happened last night didn’t actually fix me.

  Maybe it was a lovemaking thing.

  Mayra’s fingers traced over my jaw and up into my hair. Her touch was light and warm, and it reminded me of other ways she had touched me only a few hours ago. Closing my eyes for a moment, I could almost feel her hand on my chest…my stomach…my…

  “What are you thinking?”

  “Huh?” I sputtered, brought out of my fantasy. “Um…nothing?”

  “Oh, really?” Mayra smirked.

  “No.” I blushed at the confession.

  She shook her head a little and pulled my head against her chest. I felt her lips press into my hair.

  “I want you again,” I told her.

  “Well, maybe you should do something about that.”

  I felt my face heat up, and my cock began to make its own way toward her thigh. I licked my lips and cringed a bit.

  “I need to…um…not yet,” I said.

  “What’s wrong?” she asked.

  “I need to brush my teeth.”

  “Me, too.” Mayra laughed again.

  We shared the sink, both of us still completely naked and standing in front of the mirror, ready to brush. It was weird, and I didn’t like it too much. For some reason, brushing my teeth in front of her made me feel far more naked than just lacking clothing. Thankfully, her toothbrushing made her boobs shake up and down a little, which I could watch stealthily in the mirror.