Sanctum (Blackwater Pack Book 1)

by Hannah McBride

  Her brows raised suggestively, her eyes flickering to where Remy stood talking with his father and Michael. "Just Larkin and Katy?"

  I couldn't help the smile that started to pull at my lips, my eyes following her gaze. "Okay, maybe not just them."

  Zoe hummed under her breath, green eyes gleaming. She nudged her shoulder into mine. "You seem happier than when you left here."

  "I do?"

  "There was such a sadness in your eyes," she said, a sad smile on her face. "You always looked like you were waiting for something bad to happen. You are too young to have that look in your eyes, to look so exhausted. Now ... you look lighter. Like maybe you found someone to help shoulder the burden a bit?"

  Suddenly emotion clogged my throat. I coughed, trying to clear the lump as I blinked away tears. "I never knew that being in a pack could feel this way. That I could feel safe."

  Sniffing, Zoe pressed her hands to my cheeks. "You are incredible, Skye. And you're going to do great things, I know it."

  "Now you're clairvoyant?" I teased, trying to lighten the mood.

  Her hand settled over her stomach. "Call it mother's intuition."

  "I'm so happy for you and Michael. You're going to be great parents." Whoever that kid was, he or she was going to have an amazing life full of love and support.

  "Time to eat!" Mallory called, lifting the serving platter of pot roast. Gabe snatched the heavy plate from her hands with a wry grin, stealing a kiss on the way as he carried it into the dining room.

  Dax and Sam were already in their seats, and I noticed that the table had been extended out from the first time I was there to accommodate more people.

  Everyone found a seat and, without thinking, I slipped into the seat next to Remy.

  My mom glanced up at me across the table, surprise flitting across her face when she noticed I wasn't in the vacant seat to her left. Katy claimed it immediately, flashing me a knowing smile.

  Under the table, Remy's hand found my thigh and rested there. I could feel the heat of his hand through the denim of my skinny jeans.

  During the meal, we talked about everything except Granite Peak and the pack tensions. It was like the adults all had an unspoken agreement not to bring it up in front of us.

  But I saw Gabe's jaw tighten when Katy struggled to get up from her chair, the way Mallory caught herself from asking us about our upcoming finals.

  By the time dinner was over, I was exhausted. The week of stress at GPA, the long drive, and a belly full of hot food made me ready to sleep for a week.

  Across from me, Katy barely stifled a yawn behind her hand.

  "It's getting late," Mallory said, smiling softly at her daughter, but there were small worry lines around her dark eyes as she noticed Katy was getting more and more tired.

  It was barely seven o'clock.

  My mom stood and started to gather the plates around her when Mallory waved her off.

  "Don't worry about that, Addie," she said. "We'll take care of it. Why don't you and Skye head for home? I'm sure she's exhausted, too."

  "I can help," I protested.

  Remy turned teasing eyes to me. "Are you questioning my mother?"

  "She gave you a get out of dishes free card," Dax said, taking a bite of his fifth dinner roll. Everyone had finished eating almost fifteen minutes earlier, except the twins. "Use it while you can. Odds are she'll be treating you like one of us soon enough since you're basically part of the family."

  There was a scuffling noise and Dax hissed, glaring at his twin. "Why did you kick me? It's true. She and Remy are practically married since they're bonded and all."

  "Dax!" Gabe snapped sharply. I wasn't sure if that was a dad tone or an Alpha tone, but it had Dax blanching.

  "Dammit, Dax," Remy muttered, shooting his brother an exasperated look.

  Dax held up his hands innocently. "What? It's not like it's a secret. Besides, Skye seems cool. She can be part of the family."

  Katy groaned, dropping her head into her open palm. "Shut up, Dax."

  The table was completely silent and I was having a hard time looking anywhere except my plate.

  "What do you mean bonded?" my mom asked calmly, setting her glass down.

  My eyes lifted to hers, and I flinched.

  She might have sounded calm when she spoke, but her emerald eyes were a turbulent riot of emotions right now.

  Shit.

  37

  "Skye? What's going on?" my mom demanded, her eyes narrowed across the table from me.

  How did I even start to answer that question?

  I had a whole speech planned out to tell her about Remy and me and the bond. A speech that was best delivered after she was on cloud nine having shown off our new apartment, and we curled up on the couch together.

  It definitely wasn't a speech I planned to tell a room full of people, and even if I had wanted to, the words I planned to say vanished like smoke in the wind when I felt all eyes turn to me.

  "Addie, maybe we should-" Zoe started softly.

  "I need to know what's going on, Zoe," my mom said, her tone quiet but firm. Her eyes never left mine. She arched a single brow. "Skye?"

  Remy leaned his shoulder against mine, silently offering support.

  I took a deep breath. "Remy and I are mates. Bonded mates."

  She blinked once. Twice. Three times.

  And then laughed.

  Not just a little chuckle, but a full blown belly laugh that had her gasping and everyone glancing around at each other.

  "Very funny," Mom said, wiping her eyes. “You almost had me, kiddo.”

  "I'm not kidding," I said carefully.

  She snorted. "Of course you are. I mean ... you're only seventeen. You can't have a mate."

  "Adalynne," Gabe said softly. "I know it's hard to believe since they're so young, but they are bonded."

  Mom's gaze swung down the table to the Alpha. His words seemed to slowly be penetrating her brain. "Bonded?" Her gaze jerked back to me.

  I shrugged, helpless. "The bond snapped into place the first time we were shifted together."

  Her eyes narrowed as confusion set in. "Are you sure?"

  I felt my eyebrows raise. "Do you honestly think I would make up something like this?"

  "When exactly did this happen?" she demanded, her eyes flickering to Remy.

  "A couple weeks ago," I admitted.

  Her face went ashen. "A couple of weeks ago? And you're just now mentioning this?" She looked so sad in that moment it broke my heart. She was sad because I kept this from her.

  Because I didn't trust her with this.

  Without thinking, my hand found Remy's under the table. I needed some sort of physical anchor to him right now.

  "I was going to tell you tonight," I said gently, needing her to understand. "I wanted to wait until we were alone so I could explain in person."

  Her wide eyes swung back to Gabe and then Mallory. "You knew about this? You all knew?"

  "Remy told me when it happened," Gabe admitted, "and I told Mallory."

  "We only figured it out right before dinner," Dax added softly, his head ducked. "I'm sorry - I didn't mean to mess anything up." He looked imploringly at me and then Remy, trying to convey how sorry he was.

  I gave him a small smile. It wasn't his fault. This was all on me.

  Closing her eyes, my mom dropped her chin to the chest, taking several deep breaths. After a heavy pause, she lifted her eyes to me. "Thank you all for dinner. If you don't mind, I need to be excused."

  I swallowed, my heart sinking. "We're going home?"

  Her jaw tensed and she looked down the table at me, her expression sad. "I need a minute, Skye."

  Zoe sighed softly, her hand covering her mouth. "Addie-"

  My mom's gaze stayed glued to the table as she stood. She slowly got to her feet, the move fluid and graceful even as her hands shook visibly. "Zo, I need some time to process this. Alone, please."

  My hand covered Remy’s under the tab
le, my nails digging into the back of his hand as I swallowed my emotions. Katy's eyes were huge across from me.

  "Adalynne," Gabe said quietly, his voice patient, "they didn't have a choice in this."

  "Believe me, I understand that better than most," my mom whispered, stepping around her chair.

  "Mom." I looked at her desperately. No matter what had ever happened, it was always Mom and me. Her leaving me behind, even for a minute, felt like I was being abandoned.

  Her gaze snapped to me. "I need a few minutes, honey. It's going to be fine."

  Panic swelled up in me. I had made the wrong choice. I had chosen Remy, and it was going to cost me my mother.

  I slowly stood up, hearing Remy's low growl as I got to my feet.

  "I can come with you."

  Her chest heaved as she breathed, nostrils flaring. "Skye-"

  "Mom," I cut her off, trying to be as kind as possible despite the storm of emotions brewing in me. "Mom, you need to understand. I'm okay with this. I want to be with Remy."

  "You're my child," she said, her eyes starting to fill with tears. "All I want is for you to be happy. But this is ... a lot for me to take in right now."

  "Let me come with you." I threw my napkin on my plate. “We need to talk about this!”

  "Skye ..." Her voice shook as she tried to stay calm for both of us. "Baby, you have to know this isn’t the life I wanted for you."

  My hand landed on Remy's shoulder, touching the rock hard muscles tensed there. "Mom, please listen to me. No one is making me do anything. This is my choice. I'm so sorry I didn't tell you before - that's on me. But I was going to tell you tonight that I choose Remy." I sucked in a shaky breath, biting my lower lip. "Please don't be upset I didn't tell you. I wasn't trying to hide anything from you, I swear."

  I drew in a ragged breath. “Can’t you be happy for me?”

  With an anguished cry, the dam broke in my mom and she started crying. With a sob, she shoved away from the table and all but ran from the room. The front door slammed a second later.

  Zoe immediately got to her feet. "I'll go after her."

  "No, I will," I said, shaking my head, feeling completely gutted.

  Remy lifted his eyes to mine. He knew how much I was hurting, and I could see it was killing him that there was nothing he could do. "Babe."

  I raised the hand on his shoulder to his face, cradling his jaw and smiling when he leaned into my touch. "I know. I'll be back in a minute."

  He turned his head, kissing the palm of my hand.

  I turned to Gabe. "I'm sorry-"

  Mallory sighed. "Honey, you don't have to explain anything to us. We all knew this would be an adjustment. I think something else is going on here. Give her time to sort out her emotions, love."

  I nodded and hurried out of the house to catch up to Mom.

  I didn't have to go far - she was sitting on the bench in the far corner of the porch. One hand was resting on her neck, absently rubbing across the scar that had been there as long as I could remember.

  She always rubbed that same spot whenever she was nervous, anxious, or a combination of the two.

  Silently I walked over to her, sitting down and pulling my knees up to my chest before leaning my body against hers. Her arm came around me immediately.

  "I mean it," she said softly. "I'll be all right. I need some time to … adjust to this."

  "Mom, talk to me," I replied, begging her to understand. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you. I know you probably feel like I was lying to you the whole time I was with Remy."

  She stiffened beside me as I confirmed her worst fears.

  I plowed ahead. "Trust me, I know how crazy this sounds. A couple months ago we were still in Long Mesa and ... Jesus, we both know how messed up that was. Then we run away, find a new pack, and I leave for school? Then I bond with my mate after only knowing him for less than two weeks? Trust me - I was seriously losing it."

  She turned to me. “Then why didn’t you come to me? Why am I just now hearing about this, Skye?”

  I squeezed her fingers in mine. “Because I knew you would think this was somehow your fault. I knew you would think the same thing I did at first - that, once again, my life is being controlled by something other than me.”

  She sighed. "Honey-"

  "But then I talked to Remy," I continued, making sure I had her eyes on mine. "Mom, he's amazing. I mean, I knew he was a great guy before we bonded, but now? He lets me set the pace. He knows Long Mesa was a bad situation."

  "You told him?"

  I hesitated. "Not everything." Looking down I picked at the toe of my shoe. "He knows about being an omega in the pack and what it meant. I didn't tell him ... the other stuff."

  "Are you going to?" she pressed gently.

  I shrugged. "I know I will eventually. It's just... embarrassing."

  A pained noise escaped her. "Baby, you have done nothing to be ashamed of. And if he's truly your mate, it won't matter to him what happened to you before."

  "I know that in my head," I agreed. "But it's hard to get my heart on the same page, you know?"

  With a snort, she rolled her eyes. "Oh, I absolutely get that."

  My throat worked around the lump of emotion lodged there. “Mom, I’m falling in love with him.”

  Her eyes flared wide.

  “And I’m scared, Mom. I’m scared that for the first time in my life because I’m happy, and I’m so afraid I’m going to mess it up.”

  I choked on a sob as she pulled me into her arms fiercely. “Oh, my girl,” she whispered, rocking us.

  After a second, she pulled back and framed my wet cheeks with her hands, meeting my gaze.

  “Skye, look at me. I need you to hear this, honey.” She sniffled and shook her hair out of her eyes. “You are not going to mess this up. You are worthy of love, and you are destined for great things.”

  A strangled laugh escaped me. “Great things, huh?”

  “The best,” she swore, pulling me against her side and cuddling me close the way she had when I was little.

  “You've been through so much," she whispered, stroking my hair. "If Remy makes you even a little happy, then I'm okay with this. It just ... caught me by surprise. All I will ever want is for you to be safe and happy."

  "He does make me happy," I told her. "He also makes me feel safe. I know he won't let anything happen to me."

  "Yeah?"

  I rolled my eyes and smiled. “I can’t explain it. He's the person that calms me down when I feel like I'm going crazy. When I’m on the verge of a panic attack, everything in me knows I’ll be okay if he’s with me.“

  I realized what I was saying and stopped, blushing. “Probably sounds ridiculous, huh?”

  “No,” she replied softly, touching my hand supportively, “it sounds like you … found your mate.”

  I ignored all the hurt in her voice when she whispered that last word.

  "He's going to be Alpha one day," she reminded me, her tone brighter. "Are you ready to be Mrs. Alpha?"

  I wrinkled my nose. "Seriously?"

  With a chuckle, she shrugged. "Hey, I'm just pointing out the obvious."

  I looked out into the darkness, peace settling on me and something else that felt a lot like pride. "Remy's going to be an amazing Alpha. I'll do whatever it takes to support him."

  Mom looked down at me with a soft smile. "Who are you, and what have you done with my baby girl?"

  I smirked. "Ha ha."

  "I guess we should get inside so I can apologize to Gabe and Mallory for running out like that," she said, then winced. "And I need to apologize to Remy."

  "Mom." I hesitated but then pushed on. "Is something else going on here I need to know about? Something you aren't telling me?"

  A dark look shuttered her eyes. "Of course not, honey. It's just been a long, exciting day. I'm tired. Why don't we go say goodnight, and I can show you the new apartment?" She stood up and held a hand out to me.

  Grabbing her hand, I pulled
her into a fierce hug as I rose to my feet.

  "I love you, Mom," I whispered into her neck, locking my arms tight around her.

  Her hands came up around me just as hard. "I love you more."

  Laughing, I shook my head as I pulled away and looked at her. "I love you most."

  She smoothed a hand across my cheek. "Not even possible." Smiling, she dropped her forehead to rest against mine.

  The peace of the moment was shattered a second later when a car came careening around the bend, the engine revving as the tires caught on gravel and started to spin.

  My mom shoved me behind her as the front door flew open. Gabe and Remy stormed through the door. Remy's eyes went to me, checking quickly to make sure I was okay. His eyes narrowed when he saw I had been crying, but the car sliding to a stop in front of the stairs had everyone’s attention.

  Mallory and Michael came outside, flanking Gabe and Remy as they watched with wide eyes.

  The driver's side door opened, and a tall figure tumbled out, landing hard on their hands and knees. Sniffing, I caught the scent of blood in the air.

  Gabe came down two stairs, Remy at his back. Both were tense and poised for a fight.

  I gasped as the person literally crawled around the front of the car, into the beam of the headlights.

  "Oh, God," mom whispered, her voice breaking as she stumbled forward.

  Gabe and Remy were already thundering down the last of the stairs as the person at the foot of them collapsed.

  Gabe managed to drop to his knees and catch Zara's head right before she hit the ground.

  38

  Chaos exploded around us.

  Mallory and Michael raced down the front steps, followed closely by Mom and I. Mallory dropped down to her mate's side, taking over assessing Zara while Remy and Michael immediately took up defensive positions, checking for any threats.

  Mom fell to her hands and knees beside Mallory, checking Zara's pulse and trying to wake her up.

  A strangled cry behind us had me spinning and stepping aside as Zoe ran to her sister. Katy and the twins stood stunned in the doorway.