by Alice Carina
I deleted this book the first time because, honestly, I was attacked for it. While I had many supportive and encouraging readers, there were some people who didn't like it and instead of refraining from reading they took it out on me and I wasn't good at dealing with pressure, so I just took it down and even deleted the entire file so that I never had to look at it again.
I'm still not sure why I brought it back, though. I think it's because this was my first completed story and the first time I got other people's attention as a possible writer... I'm not sure, but here it is. I tried to keep the plot almost exactly as it was; flaws and all. I purposely repeated the same mistakes in characters and cheesiness in some chapters and exaggerations in some situations because I would like to remember one day where I had started from and how I developed my style and awareness in my creation process.
I'll be the first to admit that this story is very lacking and anything but perfect, I don't even think that it's good, but these were the ideas of a girl between the ages of 12 and 14 who wanted to sort of test out the waters in the writing world and somehow got your attention, so... yeah...
That man with scars on his face? He fought for your freedom. That girl with the really short and tight outfits? She grew out of them but can't afford new ones. That pregnant young girl on the bus? She got raped and had too much heart to kill an innocent soul. That kid everybody makes fun of? He already has people telling him how worthless he is at home. That tough-looking guy with street-fights' bruises and wounds? He got them at home from the people who are supposed to love him.
We tend to look at people and instantly make an unvoiced judgment – that's if they're lucky, for we often voice our hurtful disapprovals. Everybody has a story that they may not feel like sharing, everybody wants to be heard, everybody wants to be accepted, and everybody has weaknesses and things that they are ashamed of. Just because yours aren't as visible to others, doesn't give you or anyone the right to point out their flaws and judge them for them.
That was the whole point of writing 'Pregnant By My Sister's Boyfriend' or 'Second Chances' (I changed the title to Second Chances because it feels more inclusive for all the other characters and all of our daily-life mistakes). Katelyn was a young girl who got pregnant by her sister's boyfriend. That is the true, general summary of what had happened. But you read her story, felt her pain, and wanted her to stop being so defenseless and snap out of her guilt and move on. Katelyn did as horrific a social crime as possible, and yet you loved her and shared her journey. If she deserved a second chance after doing such a deed, then doesn't everyone? Don't you?
I hoped to motivate people with Katie's weakness. When people are surrounded by hatred and accusations, they tend to hate themselves and live through an intolerable guilt, but you need to forgive yourself because, sometime, no one else might. The next time you feel weighed down by a past mistake, remember how you had wanted Katie to snap out of it and let it go, remember how you thought that even after what she had done, she didn't deserve all that guilt and that she had every right to stop being weak and alone. The next time someone tells you a juicy rumor about someone, remember that many lies were told about Katie and how you wanted everyone who was mean to her to know the truth. The next time you feel like judging someone, remember how you felt sympathy for her and offer them your human compassion, because we all need that at one point.
Loved
"Katie, are you done yet?" Josslyn walked into my room. She was smiling and speaking softly, but her tone was fake and her eyes were wide with panic, and I knew that Kyle must've arrived.
"Yeah, just a minute,"
Chad's mom had been trying to make amends with her son before he started college and, while she refused to attend Light's birthday party, she did send her a gift with him. She sent her a little dress that was too plain and almost classy, something that I knew from seeing her once that she would've bought for her own daughter had she ever had one. It was a peace offering, and I decided to return it with my own by putting it on Light immediately so that in all of her pictures – which his mom was bound to see some of – there would be at least one thing that she approved of.
"Here we go," I smiled as I finished decorating Light's hair with the new heart-shaped clips Josslyn had bought her.
"Come here, my little light bulb." Josslyn smiled as she picked her up.
"Stop calling her that," I glared at my sister.
"Bub-bub," Light giggled, taking her aunt's side.
I followed Josslyn and the three of us went out to the backyard. Joss was shaking, so she held onto Light tightly. I was shaking too and I instantly held onto Chad tightly when he approached me. It was supposed to be just a small get-together, our normal company but with balloons and cake, except that Kyle and I had decided that it was time for him to see her and that he should be allowed to be there for her first birthday.
Mom and Patty were chatting together and spreading the plates around the table, Chelsea was sitting next to them smiling at my mom but avoiding looking at hers, my dad and Chelsea's were talking to the side, Kyle was standing alone far away from everybody, and Chad had been standing the farthest from him, closest to the door. But, as soon as we came out, everyone seemed naturally drawn to Light as they huddled together closer to her, one family in their love for her.
A part of me hoped that Light would reject Kyle when he reached out for her, but she clearly didn't remember him kidnapping her as she smiled widely at him like she did at everyone and settled in his arms.
We all tensed up when he held her, and we all pretended to be busy with other things while watching him too obviously and waiting for any sign of discomfort from her to take her back.
That afternoon was awkward.
Chelsea hardly used her phone for those few hours, but every time she so much as glanced at it, Patty tensed and glared at her, and I knew that Chelsea must've told her about Seth. Chelsea and Seth had reunited a while back, but she insisted that they were just friends and that she was just helping him as a friend. She convinced him to go to college and get a degree so that he would have future plans distracting him from the past, and he got accepted into the same college as her. I didn't know what was going to happen between them and she didn't either, but she told her mom about him – not everything of course, only the part about him being a bit older, and that was enough for Patty to freak out and take Chelsea's phone away for two months until school ended and college approached and she had no choice but to give it back.
Josslyn, on the other hand, didn't let go of her phone for a single minute. She was constantly texting and smiling at the screen. Josslyn had moved on from Kyle and went back to seeing a new guy every other day a while back, but I didn't know if she was so attached to her phone that day because she was truly interested in the guy on the other end or just to make sure that Kyle – who kept glancing at her – knew that she was over him.
Kyle tried too hard to show that he was only there for Light's sake. He carried her – awkwardly, revealing that he'd never actually carried a baby before, played with her, tried feeding her, and avoided looking directly at anyone else. But, every few minutes, his eyes went to Josslyn then instantly turned away, as if he couldn't believe he no longer had the right to look at her that way. And there was obvious panic in his eyes as he faked smiles at Light, as if he couldn't believe that we were letting him hold her, that she was letting him hold her, that she was real and there and his. She was too much for him, but he pretended to be okay, and we all pretended not to notice.
My dad, who'd been the calmest when I informed everyone that Kyle was coming to Light's birthday, moved as far away from Kyle as possible when he arrived and even went back inside the house to watch TV with Chelsea's dad when he couldn't tolerate being near him any longer without relieving his anger.
Chad didn't even pretend that he wasn't watching Kyle; he didn't take his eyes off him for a single moment, and the second Light began festering, he quickly went over, grabbed her from Kyle,
and brought her back to me. He didn't look at Kyle again after he took Light away from him. Kyle didn't seem annoyed by that. In fact, he looked relieve not to have her and everyone's eyes on him, but there was no longer anything for him to look occupied by so he kept looking at Light going back and forth between the arms of those experienced in holding and caring for her.
That afternoon was very long and very awkward, but we made it through.
I didn't know how long it would take for us to get used to Kyle again, I didn't know if he would stick around long enough for us to get used to him, I didn't know if Light was lucky to have someone like Chad want to be her only dad or if she was going to be even luckier by having two dads who loved her, I didn't know what she was going to be like when she grew up or if we were all still going to be there surrounding her on her second birthday, but I knew that day that she already had so many people who loved her.
It was awkward and uncomfortable and annoying, but we all tolerated it for her. Despite the hate that had brought her into this world and the hate that surrounded her while she was still inside me and the hate that was always going to be there in the back of everyone's heart due to the circumstances, she was loved by everyone who hated her circumstances. Amidst all the hatred between us, her love bounded us forever, whether we loved that fact or not, we all loved her and that was a fact.
And, as she looked up at me with a smile lighting up her face and my whole world, I knew that she would always be the one love everyone held onto no matter how much hatred there was around us. And I knew that whether she had two dads or one, whether we all gathered again for her birthday the next year or if it was just her and me, that she would always be loved very much.
*THE END*
Epilogue
Josslyn's P.O.V
About 10 years after the events of the story
*
"Just a minute," Marna quickly lowered her phone when I walked in. "Gianna from HR said to go see her as soon as you're back from Lunch break."
I groaned as I shrugged off my coat and quickly made my way to the elevators.
"What? What now?" I demanded as I walked into Gianna's office. "What did I do now?"
"I'm the one who should be using that tone with you."
"This is the third time you've asked for me this week," I tried to explain my frustration. "People will start talking."
"I keep asking for you because people are already talking,"
"About what?"
"What was it about the last two times you were in here?" She raised an eyebrow as she folded her arms across her chest.
"A guy," I rolled my eyes.
"Yup, a different guy each time, can you guess what you're here for today?"
"A new, different guy?"
"Would you look at that?" She clapped sarcastically. "You're actually smart. Guess it's not true that you slept your way into this company, but you sure have slept your way through it."
"There is nothing in my contract that says I'm not allowed to date a colleague." I defended.
"There also isn't any competition on who can date the most colleagues in a week."
"But it wouldn't be against my contract if I started one," I insisted. "Why am I really here?"
"Well, word has spread fast that it doesn't even take a dinner to get you to bed, and you're distracting the employees. Men are all after you and women are all intimidated by you."
"Well, I highly doubt the men were the ones who filed a complaint."
"Actually, it was a man who did."
"What?!" I shrieked. "A man complained about being too distracted by me?"
"No, a man complained that you're distracting his employees with inappropriate employee behavior."
"What?"
"The boss," she rolled her eyes at me.
"The boss? Dean?"
"That would be his name." She shrugged. "Hey, we're not done here!" She called after me, but I was already half-way down the hall.
He was complaining about me? Six-months and he didn't say a word to my face, then he went behind my back and complained about me?
The first time I met my boss wasn't at my job, it was actually just the night before. I was nervous about my interview the next day, so I decided to crash my friend's new neighbor's house-warming party. There was food and drinks and music and a cute guy that I couldn't stop kissing and agreed to leave the party and go on a date with, but by the time he got his keys I was already kissing another cute guy and I didn't think it really mattered until I showed up for my job interview the second day and realized that I'd kissed, agreed to date, then blew off my future boss.
He was very professional during the interview, didn't even hint that he remembered me, gave me the job, and never talked to me again.
"Hey, Josslyn," a guy smiled at me as I walked by. "Whoa, slow down, babe, you can't go in there." He tried to get in my way, but I'd already opened his door. "You can't just-"
Our boss was on the phone. He only briefly turned his eyes towards us at our commotion but went on ignoring us as he continued his call.
His secretary kept trying to pull at my arm to get me out, but I stubbornly fought back and refused to move until Dean was done with his call.
"What's going on?" He finally turned to us.
"I'm so sorry, sir," the man next to me apologized. "She just-"
"Do you have a problem with me?" I interrupted. "Do I show up late? Do I leave early? Am I not good at my job?"
"No, you're actually quite punctual and productive."
"I'll just leave..." His secretary made to leave awkwardly, but Dean stopped him.
"No, I'd prefer it if you stayed."
"What? You don't trust me? I scuffed. "Don't worry, if something happens between us, you'll be the first to complain."
"If you have a complaint about my complaint, put it in a box or talk to HR." He finalized and turned his attention to a file on his desk.
"Are you kidding me right now?" I demanded, but he didn't even look at me. "Is this because I didn't sleep with you?" His eyes flashed to mine with horror.
"Excuse me?"
"Are you like jealous of your employees? If so, everybody knows it's not that hard to get me, just ask him." I pointed at his secretary who looked just as equally horrified.
"I think you should get back to work,"
"Oh, come on," I rolled my eyes. "If you're interested in sleeping with me, you could've just asked, you didn't have to go around complaining about me."
"Well, from all the times I heard my employees talking about you, it feels like I've already slept with you; apparently it's very common, easy, and not that interesting." He snapped as he stood up. "My complaint was about your misconduct at a work environment."
"There's nothing in my contract-"
"You're on a trial contract," he retorted. "A contract that clearly states you can be fired at any moment without benefits for inappropriate behavior. If I have any reason to believe that you're mitigating the productivity of my staff, then be assured that your sleepover invitation will be the main factor of your unemployment."
I slept with his secretary that night.
I came home late one night after a horrible day at work to find a particular date circled in red on my calendar. I looked around my empty, small apartment and my empty-but-for-the-next-day calendar and I just wanted to run.
I put on my running shoes and plugged in my earphones and just ran.
Why was I here? Why wasn't I the one still back home, married and having children and happy? Why did I still think of them even after I forgave them and moved so far away from them?
I was running too fast, looking at my shoes and trying to run over my memories when I suddenly looked up and realized that I was only a few steps away from running into a man tying his shoes on the sidewalk. I didn't know why I panicked so much, I felt like I was in my car and would severely injure him if we collided, but it was too late to slow down so I tried to swerve my body away from him and ended up slipping
full speed onto the street with a scream.
"Are you okay?" The man – who I managed not to even brush against - only had to take one step to get to me.
"No," I whimpered, feeling the pain pulse in my ankle. "You!" My eyes widened as I looked up and saw my boss. "This is all your fault!"
"What did I do?" He pulled away from me incredulously. "You're the one who slid across the sidewalk."
"Because you were tying your shoe in the middle of the sidewalk!"
"Who runs on the sidewalk without looking ahead at the sidewalk to see if there are – oh, I don't know, other people also using the sidewalk?"
"If you want to tie your shoe, you move to the side; you don't just block people's way."
"And if you want to run, you look ahead; you don't just expect the street to be empty." He fought back.
"I didn't, I just – ouch!" I screamed as I tried to get up on my feet and quickly fell.
"Are you okay?" He neared me again.
"Of course not," I sighed with pain. "Would I be yelling at my boss in the middle of the street while I'm sitting on the sidewalk and people are staring at us if I was okay?"
"I don't know, I never got to date you to know what your okay is," he replied wittily.
"That was six months ago," I glared at him.
"I know, I was just joking,"
"What's funny about that?"
"I don't know," he shrugged.
I stared at him for a long moment. I was sitting on the sidewalk unable to move with the pain and my boss was sitting in front of me and we were discussing my 'okay' state and his sense of humor and I could hear the faint music coming out of my fallen earphones and it was just so weird and uncomfortable I decided to take my chances with my aching ankle.
"Here," he quickly tried to steady me when I was about to fall again and pulled me closer so that I could lean my weight against his body. "Do you want to go to the hospital or something?"
"No, no," I sighed. "I don't think it's that serious. I think I should just go home and rest."
