Counting Down with You

by Tashie Bhuiyan

  Then his words register.

  “So you’ll be skipping our lesson every Friday?” I ask in disbelief.

  I’ve been following Miss Cannon’s outline as a base for our sessions. If I turn five weekly meetings into four, every single lesson will have to be adjusted in order to accommodate the change.

  Ace grimaces. “Listen, I know but... I can’t not attend.”

  The reluctant look on his face is one that I understand all too well. Sometimes our parents don’t give us a choice.

  I frown. “I get it. I really do. But that’s so many days unaccounted for...”

  Before Ace can reply, Miss Cannon appears in front of our desks, beaming. “I assume your study sessions are going well?”

  I hesitate and look at Ace. He looks back at me with his lips pressed together harshly, and I’m reminded that when he showed up at our first session together, he was shocked that I hadn’t complained to Miss Cannon about him.

  “Great,” I say, turning my attention back to Miss Cannon. “Alistair has shown a lot of initiative.”

  “Do you feel you’re learning a lot from Karina?” Miss Cannon asks Ace, still grinning. Her happiness is infectious and, despite my concerns, I smile in return.

  “More than I expected,” Ace says. He’s staring at me instead of Miss Cannon. “I hope to continue learning more.”

  The weight overlaying his words makes me squirm, heat rushing to my cheeks. “I hope so, too.”

  Miss Cannon sighs happily, folding her hands together and clutching them to her chest. “I’m so glad this is working out.”

  Ace doesn’t look away as he says, “Me too.”

  Without much left to contribute, I start packing up my things and head for the door. Miss Cannon lets me slip past her with a small smile. As soon as I pass through the doors and into the hallway, fingers wrap gently around my wrist and pull me back beside a row of yellow lockers.

  I look up at Ace in surprise. His rings are cold against my skin. “What?”

  “I thought you were going to tell her about me bailing today,” he says. He doesn’t phrase it as a question, but his gaze is imploring as he looks at me.

  I shrug. “I thought we could figure it out between us first.”

  Ace is quiet as he reaches up, taking a lock of my hair between his fingers. I’m hyperaware of the fact that we’re only inches apart, and I almost wish we were closer.

  “Come to my house. We can study before dinner as long as my dad knows I’m at home and not skipping out.”

  I must be hallucinating. “You want me to go to your...house.”

  He nods, apparently unaware of the existential crisis I’m having. He wants me to come to the Clyde residence?

  “You can leave before the dinner, but at least we’ll have some time to study.”

  I shake my head, trying not to let the shock show on my face. There are a million reasons to say no, the first of which is: “My parents would kill me.”

  Ace furrows his brows. “Aren’t they out of the country?”

  “I mean, yes, but... I can’t go to your house. They’d know somehow.”

  “How?” he asks, seeming genuinely confused. “Are you going to tell them?”

  I’d sooner die than tell my parents that I’m going to a boy’s house unsupervised. “Of course not.”

  “Then what’s the harm?” He tugs on my lock of hair, causing me to take an uneven step forward. “Live a little, Ahmed.”

  “By going to your house to study,” I say dubiously. Does Ace hear himself when he speaks? I can’t imagine what it’s like to glide through life like this.

  He nods and, this time, I know I have to say something, before this goes further. “You know we’re from two different worlds, right? I can’t just do the things you do, and I’m not going to suddenly turn my life upside down to work around your schedule. My family...” I trail off, unsure how to finish that sentence.

  Ace makes a face, the twist of his mouth rueful. “Sorry. I didn’t mean—I did it again, didn’t I? I overstepped.” He sighs, shifting backward, running a hand over his face. “I only meant that I’d like to study with you today, especially since I missed Monday already. Will you be in trouble if you come to my house?”

  I bite my lip. I guess it’s not like I’d really be doing anything wrong by going to his house. “No, I suppose not.”

  He nods, eyes scanning my face. “So then...what do you have to lose?”

  My dignity, probably. Definitely my eardrums when Cora and Nandini hear about it. My life, if my parents ever find out against all odds.

  He must see the answer on my face, because he changes tactics. “You don’t have to if you don’t want to. But I’d really like you to come if you can.”

  I open my mouth, but I’m stumped. I don’t have a response to that.

  “If you’re up for it, meet me by my car after ninth. It’s parked in spot 28,” he says, finally stepping away. “See you later, Ahmed.”

  He walks off, leaving me to stare after him and wonder how my school life turned upside down within the span of a week.

  13

  T-MINUS 23 DAYS

  The main reason I end up in front of Ace’s car after gym is because Cora and Nandini both threaten to brutally murder me if I don’t go. I have a few regrets, the biggest one being telling them at all. But if I didn’t, I’d probably start screaming incoherently into the void and never stop.

  I call my grandma first, nervously pacing in the parking lot while waiting for her to pick up. My anxiety is returning in anticipation of the conversation, and I have to repeatedly wipe my hands on my jeans to get rid of excess sweat.

  I think if I tried to write my thoughts down right now, I’d break my pencil.

  “Myra?” Dadu says, after our customary greetings. “What’s wrong?”

  “Nothing,” I say quickly. Ten, nine, eight, seven, six, five, four, three, two, one. “I might get home a little later than usual today. I have to finish up something for school. Is that okay?”

  I brace myself for the blowback, expecting to be reprimanded. There’s silence and then, “That’s fine. Do you want me to leave your food in the fridge, sweetheart?”

  For some reason, I keep waiting. Surely that can’t be it.

  There has to be more. There’s always more.

  “Myra, did you hear me?” Dadu asks. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

  I shake my head and lean against Ace’s car, trying to gain a hold of myself. “Yeah, I’m fine, Dadu. I’d love if you left my food in the fridge. I’ll call you when I’m on my way home, if that’s okay?”

  “Of course, Myra,” Dadu says, her voice warm. “Thank you for letting me know. I’ll see you later.”

  “See you later,” I echo.

  I stare at my phone after we disconnect, more shocked than I should be. My grandma has never reprimanded me, but I still thought there would be some resistance. Easy acceptance is the last thing I expected.

  Then again, maybe I should have. It’s Dadu, after all.

  I inhale. Ten, nine, eight, seven, six, five, four, three, two, one. I exhale.

  Better. Not perfect, but better.

  I look down at the hand not holding my phone, then immediately jump away from Ace’s car, realizing I’m leaving smudge marks on the exterior.

  The car is far too ostentatious. It’s some sort of Mercedes, black and sleek. It probably cost as much as my future student loans.

  I try to wipe away the smudges but only make it worse, so I give up and resign myself to apologizing when he shows up.

  As I’m waiting, Xander walks up to the car beside the Mercedes. It’s fancy, too, but I don’t look at the logo, mostly because I’m ducking my head and hoping not to make eye contact.

  Does Ace’s family even know I’m coming home with him? This is a disaster
waiting to happen.

  As fate would have it, Xander stops in front of Ace’s car and stares at me as he toys with his keys. “Are you waiting for my brother?”

  Oh shit. I open my mouth...and nothing comes out.

  He looks me over in a way that sets my hair on end. As if he’s dissecting me for weaknesses. “No... You’re Cora Zhang-Agreste’s friend, aren’t you?”

  My back straightens at his tone. “Yeah. So?”

  Xander smiles. “Then you wouldn’t associate with the likes of my brother. Sorry for bothering you.”

  He disappears into his car and drives away, and I watch with narrowed eyes. I’m still looking into the distance when Ace appears five minutes later, a girl with thick, beautiful hair and dark skin following him and speaking animatedly.

  There’s a gentle expression on his face as he answers her. I’ve never seen him look at anyone that way before. I wonder who she is, racking my brain for whether anyone has been mentioned in relation to Ace in the last few months.

  “Ahmed.” Ace cocks his head and offers me a small smile. “You made it.”

  I bite my lip, shrugging. “You only live once and all that, right?”

  The girl next to him smiles at me but turns an accusing look on Ace. “She’s really pretty, Ace. You didn’t tell me she was pretty.”

  I tuck a curl of dark hair behind my ear, averting my gaze. Compliments given by girls always feel a hundred times more special. “You don’t have to say that. Thank you.”

  “Don’t thank her, Ahmed,” Ace says, his smile slipping off his face as he narrows his eyes at the girl. “Stop looking at her.”

  “I was just saying!” the girl says, raising her hands in defeat, but she’s laughing. “You’re so annoying, Ace.”

  Well. She’s not wrong.

  “She’s too old for you,” Ace says back, unlocking the car. To me, he says, “Ignore Mia.”

  “Don’t ignore me, I’m awesome,” the girl—Mia—says. “And I have access to Ace’s baby photos. I’m the better friend to have.”

  I blink, unsure what to make of this situation. “I’ll take your word for it.”

  “Also I have a girlfriend, you asshole,” she says to Ace, pulling a face. “I’m not hitting on your tutoring buddy. I just wanted to tell her she’s pretty.”

  That clears up a lot but also so little. She’s not romantically involved with Ace, but they must have some kind of personal relationship. I don’t think I’ve seen her before, so she’s probably not in our grade, but that leaves me at a loss as to how Ace knows her.

  Ace opens the door to the passenger side, gesturing for me to get inside. I hesitate, glancing at Mia but she’s already slipping into the back seat.

  I slide into the seat slowly, my skin prickling. Did Ace invite someone else to his family dinner?

  Once Ace is inside, he double-checks his mirrors and pulls the car out in one easy glide.

  “He’s a good driver, don’t worry,” Mia says from over my shoulder. I jump in my seat, not expecting her to be so close.

  “Jeez, you came out of nowhere,” I say, rubbing my chest as I try to calm down. “So, uh, how do you and Ace know each other?”

  “Ace is my stepbrother,” Mia says, which is news to me. I didn’t realize there was another Clyde sibling at our school. As if she can read my mind, Mia adds, “I’m a freshman and my last name is Jackson instead of Clyde, so it makes sense you didn’t know.”

  “It’s nice to meet you,” I say, offering my hand. “I would say I’ve heard so much about you, but Ace hasn’t said anything. He is annoying.”

  Mia snickers and takes my hand. “I like her.”

  Ace shakes his head and fiddles with the console. Instrumental music starts playing through the speakers.

  Mia leans back in her seat and hums along. Ace smiles, his gaze flickering to his rearview mirror to look at his stepsister before turning to me.

  “Ready to rumble?” he asks.

  “Ready to study.”

  He grins. “Same thing. My stepmom is going to love you.”

  “I’m not talking to your family,” I say, rolling my eyes. “I’m leaving as soon as we’re done studying.”

  Ace laughs and changes the gear from Reverse to Drive. “Whatever you say, Ahmed.”

  I wrinkle my nose as a sense of foreboding rushes through me. I watch him tap his fingers against the steering wheel and try to push the strange feeling away.

  It’s just a study session. What’s the worst that could happen?

  14

  T-MINUS 23 DAYS

  The Clyde estate is huge. I knew Ace’s father was rich, but seeing it is an entirely different thing. There are actual gates in the front of the house and a keypad that Ace has to pull up to so he can type in a lengthy code.

  We drive past a beautiful garden, a huge fountain, and a perfectly trimmed lawn, elegantly designed hedges scattered every few feet. There are even marble statues littered across the estate. I try not to gape.

  His “house” is an honest-to-God mansion. It’s designed in a Roman architectural fashion, with a large porch and grand arches and stone columns. I wouldn’t be surprised to find the Obamas taking a casual stroll down the lawn.

  Mia runs off almost immediately, after jumping up to kiss Ace’s cheek and promising to catch up with us before she disappears into the house.

  Ace is slower, listening to the last notes of the song playing on the stereo, before shutting down the car and following me out. “Mia can be a lot.”

  “She seems sweet,” I say, slowly walking down the stone path until I reach the porch. “I didn’t know you had stepsiblings.”

  “Just the one,” he says, before nodding toward the front door. “Ladies first.”

  “What a gentleman.” I step inside and I can’t contain the way my jaw drops. The inside of the house is just as beautiful as the outside, with exquisite paintings in the foyer and lavish furniture extending into the hallway. There’s a diamond chandelier in the entryway, and I pause to stare at it in disbelief.

  “How much money do you have?” I ask, because I apparently don’t have a shred of decency or any sense of tact. Ace doesn’t seem to mind. He’s watching me in amusement.

  “Enough,” he says. “I can’t touch most of it, since it’s in a trust fund, but my dad gives me and my siblings a monthly allowance.”

  I know Cora also gets an allowance, but I think my parents would sooner kick me out of the house than hand me a lump sum every month. Instead, I have to rely on birthday and Eidi money to last me through the year.

  I want to ask Ace more, because all of this is a lot, but he starts walking down the hall. I immediately follow. The house is so big, I’m afraid I might get lost otherwise.

  As we walk, my jaw nearly unhinges. Who has paintings on their walls? There’s even an uncanny amount of vases. I’ve seen the Bollywood film Kabhi Khushi Kabhie Gham enough times to steer clear of those. If I broke one, I’d probably die on the spot.

  Ace leads me up a spiraling marble staircase, and we’re walking down the hallway when I hear a loud bark behind me and freeze. I turn slowly and see a large golden retriever bounding toward us.

  “Down, boy!” Ace says, but the dog comes at us full speed anyway.

  I squeak in terror and hide behind Ace, clutching his leather jacket.

  Dogs are adorable. Objectively, I know this. However, my parents heavily warned me off them because they’re basically haram, so I’m at an impasse. I wish my body didn’t lock up the second that I see one, especially because they look so cuddly and fun to be around.

  “Ahmed, he’s not gonna hurt you,” Ace says, his voice heavy with amusement as he pets his dog.

  “Dogs scare me,” I whisper, too embarrassed to say it any louder than that.

  Ace turns to look at me, eyebrows furrowed. “Seriousl
y?”

  I nod, still clutching on to him. “It’s a whole thing. My parents taught me to be afraid of them.”

  “They what?”

  I sigh and explain how my parents projected their view of dogs onto me, going as far as telling me I was allergic when I was younger so I would stay away from them. When I’m done, he’s frowning deeply. “Why did they do that?”

  “Some conservative Muslims don’t like dogs because they’re seen as impure,” I say, eyeing the golden retriever, who’s wagging his tail happily. “Personally, I think dogs are cute, but my parents freaked me out about it really bad when I was younger, so I’m kind of...hesitant now.”

  “Spade won’t hurt you,” Ace says, before holding out a hand toward me. “I’ll show you if you want.”

  I shake my head. It’s not like I’ve never petted a dog before. I have. But it’s always so intimidating, and I have to work up the nerve to do it.

  Then I have a different thought. “Your name is Ace and you named your dog Spade?”

  “I was ten,” Ace says, shrugging. “Spade seemed fitting. Isn’t that right, boy?”

  Ace leans down and nuzzles Spade, running his hands through the dog’s fur coat. “You like the name Spade, don’t you?”

  The dog barks happily, licking Ace’s face.

  Ace laughs, pushing Spade away with a light touch. “See, Ahmed? He’s gentle.” He offers me his hand again. “Are you sure you don’t want to pet him? It’s up to you, but I’ll be with you the whole time.”

  I bite my lip, considering my options. Ace and the dog are giving me puppy dog eyes now, which should be illegal. Despite my nerves, I slowly put my hand forward and Ace takes it.

  Spade is quiet and patient as he waits for me to near him. Ace places my hand between his ears, and his fur is soft and fluffy beneath my palm. “See?”

  I waver before giving the dog a careful rub. Spade’s mouth opens into a wide grin, his tail wagging again.