by Leesa Bow
I’m too scared to move knowing there are girls out there, and they witnessed my plus-size bra on the floor. My gut is tight realising what the giggles were about.
Reef shuts the door and locks it placing my clothes at the end of the bed. “You have no option but to stay the night with me.” He kisses my cheek.
“They already know it’s me.” I nod to my bra. “Besides, I can’t.”
He strokes my face. “Can’t or won’t?”
I want to say both. “Can’t. I have to get home and check on my dad.”
“Oh.” He pulls a face as though it isn’t the answer he expected.
“I… take care of him. I don’t like to be gone long.”
Creases form near his eyes as though he’s thinking.
“So, I’m going to have to brave it.” I jump up and head to the bathroom before dressing. I run my fingers through my hair. I’m not sure why since his friends know what we’ve been doing. I slip on my shoes. Reef walks me out, and one of his friends cheers when they see me. I want to roll my eyes only I don’t because I’m more embarrassed at the way the two other girls are gaping at me. To make it worse, I recognise one of them from the restaurant.
Bloody terrific.
Reef squeezes my hand. “This is Macy. Macy this is everyone.”
I hold up one guilty hand then make my way to the door.
“Sorry for ruining your night, you two,” the tall red-haired guy says.
“It’s fine, I was leaving anyway.”
“You’re slipping, Reef, letting her get away.”
“She’s not getting away,” he spits back. “Mace will be back in a couple of nights, so you dopes better not be here.”
Two days later, I tell Dad, “I’m heading out to the grocery store.” It’s enough to buy me time with Reef and for Dad not to be suspicious. I enter his apartment and head straight to the bedroom and leave thirty minutes later. Then I call past the grocery store to collect a few items before heading home.
The following day, Reef comes into work and after finishing his coffee, waits until my break. We drive to his penthouse and fuck for exactly twenty-two minutes before he drives me back to work.
“Are you coming around after work tonight?” he asks before I race into Lombardi’s.
It’s a Friday, and his friends arranged to head to the local bar, like most Friday nights. We’ll have his apartment to ourselves. It’s enough time for me to enjoy those special minutes with Reef, and keep a schedule to spend time with Dad.
“Sure.” I open up the calendar on my phone and write, Reef at the six o’clock slot.
“Make it for the next four Friday nights,” he says and grins.
Two weeks later, I’m standing in the foyer, and like the previous two Fridays, I intend to stay for an hour.
The time frame is my safety net. It keeps what we’re doing real and all about the sex. Plus, I keep my promise to be home to check on my father in case something happens and I’m not there. The thought jars me out of my dreamy state after an orgasm. My time is almost up, so I roll off the bed. Reef moves to the side of the bed where I stand and reaches for my arm to still me for a moment.
“Please stay, Mace.”
I gaze down into his beautiful eyes. “I can’t,” I croak. Pulling my arm from his grip, I dress quickly.
“Sure you can. I think you’re scared.”
“I’m not scared. I told you I have to get home to my dad.” I tie the straps to my wraparound floral dress.
“It’s after nine. What will he be doing?”
“He’ll be in bed. I need to check he’s okay.” I lean down and slip on my sandals, not wanting to have this conversation with him now.
“So, you check and go to bed. Doesn’t he have a phone to call you on if he needs you?”
“Yeah, but sometimes he can’t.” I shake my head, not wanting to explain our lives and routine.
“Does he tell you to come home?”
“It’s not the point.” I stand and brush my hair into a ponytail.
“It is the point.” He grabs my hand again. “You don’t want to stay because you’re afraid of opening up to me. Admitting you like being with me.”
“Of course, I like being with you. I’m here every chance I get.” I slide my hand from his grip. “I need you to try and understand.”
“How long will it be like this?”
“What?”
Reef pushes a hand through his fringe and looks dead into my eyes. “You taking off. I want you to stay the night so we can wake up together. Is it ever going to happen?”
“If this is about morning sex, then I can come here every lunch break if you want.” I toss my phone and brush into my bag.
“Don’t make it sound like it’s only sex. You know we mean more to each other.”
I spin and glare at him. “It is about the sex. We don’t mean more because face it, even you had said you’re having a good time while you’re playing football.” I don’t want guilt to ruin what we have. And I don’t want him to trick me into believing we have something more. I can’t risk getting my heart broken all over again. And I certainly can’t risk not going home to my father or not checking in on him first.
He stands. Naked. Fists on his hips. “So, why was I going to ask you to come to Melbourne with me at Christmas and meet my family?”
My mouth falls open, but no words come. I shake my head trying to take in what he just said. “You know I couldn’t leave Dad, especially at Christmas,” I rasp. My throat is tight knowing what his words mean.
“No, I don’t know. You’ve told me nothing. Only you have to leave every night, and you can’t stay one night with me.”
“I’m not getting into this with you now.” I love my time with him, but he’s confusing me. I have to be responsible, and I don’t expect Reef to understand. We have great sex together. Isn’t it enough?
I walk out on the verge of tears and fight it the entire ride home. Of course, I want to stay with him. My body hums when I’m with Reef. I promised myself nine years ago I’d look out for Dad. I’m not about to break that promise for sex, even if the thought of lying next to Reef all night stirs excitement like never before.
When I pull up at my house, I park behind a strange car. The lights are on inside. What’s going on? I hope Dad’s okay.
I hear voices along the hallway, and I have no clue who could be here. “Dad,” I say to warn him.
“Love, I want you to meet my friend,” he says, pointing for me to go to the living room.
I step in the room and do a double-take at the woman I met at the pool. “Hi, I’m Macy.”
“Bernadette,” she says and holds out her hand.
Bernadette who had a broken leg?
“I’ll make a tea and head to bed.” I smile at Dad, so happy he has made a friend.
Dad follows me into the kitchen. Leans on his crutch to talk with me. “How was your night?”
“Fine.”
“When I said you didn’t have to come home, I meant it.”
“I know.”
“Because Bernadette is staying the night.”
I pause, kettle halfway to pouring hot water. “What?”
“She’s visited those nights you were out. Only stayed a couple of hours because she didn’t want to offend you. I asked her to stay. We want to have a go at this.”
I blink, willing my brain to catch up. “Okay. Do you mind if I head out then?”
“Of course not, love. I’ll call if I need you.”
Grabbing my keys, I head out the door, relieved not to be in the house tonight. Shit, I’d need to sleep with a pillow over my ears.
Driving to Reef’s, a million things run through my head.
His reaction to me coming back.
How I’ll feel in the morning.
Where do I park the car?
Right now, I don’t care. I park it in a four-hour zone and chance getting a fine. The receptionist recognises me and waves me through. Wow.
“Can I help you?”
Music blares from the speakers in the living room. I can’t believe in the short time I was gone a party is pumping.
“I’m looking for Reef.”
He pushes the door wider and shoves a thumb toward the lounge. I take a step inside and see him on the lounge with two girls either side him, both of them in bloody bikinis. I freeze on the spot. He hasn’t looked up considering the blonde is talking with her hands demanding his attention, and he is laughing with her. He looks so happy and right at home with those girls.
The tall dude’s gaze darts from Reef to me and back to Reef.
“Thanks, but I changed my mind.” I turn and head for the elevator keeping my finger on the button. Come on. Come on.
I glance toward Reef’s door. Please don’t come out.
My gut is in knots. My chest is so tight I can hardly breathe. “Why did I believe him?”
After a quick ride in the elevator, I run toward my car. A few steps from my car, I turn to look over my shoulder and jump when my phone sounds with an incoming call. Fumbling to find it, I pull it out of my bag and read the screen, and tap decline. “Fuck you, Reef,” I mumble.
I let go of all my emotions the entire ride home. My chest aches, and my muscles are taut, constricting any movement I make. I pant each breath as I sob. Tear trails stain my cheeks. I take a moment when I park my car in our driveway, inhale a single deep breath, and wipe my eyes before heading inside to face Dad.
His door is shut. There are soft voices on the other side of it.
Collapsing onto my bed, I curl up into a ball and allow the tears to flow quietly. The knife in my heart twists—the pain of a fool. Everything I ever thought was true.
The joke is on me.
I trusted him.
I allowed him to penetrate my walls believing everything he told me.
Bellas before Fellas.
Why didn’t I listen to Georgia?
I envisaged spending so much time with him this weekend, surprising him with a picnic on Sunday.
A sob escapes my lips as a sharp pain rips down the centre of my gut. I’m sliced open, raw, and hurting. I muffle the tears, not wanting the sound to go beyond my room.
I close my eyes. All I see is him.
I open them again with no clue how to get Reef out of my head.
What a crappy way to start the weekend.
Chapter Fourteen
MACY
Seven missed calls.
Three texts.
One Instagram message from Chance.
I can’t bear to look at the texts from Reef, so I read Chance’s message.
Heading to the airport now. It’s not too late to change your mind for a road trip.
For the past hour, Dad and Bernadette have been in the kitchen. It’s odd to think someone else is here in our space, and I’m not sure if I’m comfortable with it. I thought this was what I wanted. Like Reef and I. Thought the sex was all I wanted. Last night was too much. Too much emotion. What I do know is I don’t want Reef to say it was a misunderstanding and convince me to go to him. Have me believe it was all in my head. I know what I saw. For him to be with semi-naked girls so soon after I left, I—
I’m acting jealous and insecure.
It’s not who I am, and since I’ve been with Reef, I’m recognising myself less.
Water pipes vibrate inside the wall near my room. It’s how I know someone is taking a shower. I get dressed and head out to the kitchen not sure who I’ll find.
Dad looks up from reading the paper at the table. A dirty frying pan sits on the stove. “Morning, love. I didn’t hear you come in last night.”
“Hey.” I lean over and kiss him on the top of his head. “I changed my mind. Decided not to go out.”
He gives me a pointed look as though he knows something’s up. He’s recognised the signs since I was a little girl.
“You sound chirpy. So, I’m guessing last night went well.”
He winks at me, and I don’t want to think about it further.
“I was thinking maybe Bernadette might like to stay tonight as well,” I say, thinking about Chance’s message. I’ve taken the worst risk by opening my heart to trust Reef, so not much else can scare me. A road trip should be a piece of cake.
“We only planned one night. Taking it slow and all. But we really hit it off, and slow is for you young folk because time isn’t on our side. Guess there’s no harm in asking her.”
“Well, if not, it’s fine. I was trying to be spontaneous. And since you’re always telling me to go out, I had an idea. Remember the road trip with Chance Bateman I was telling you about?”
“Vaguely.”
“It’s today. He sent me a message earlier this morning. I thought it might be a good chance for me to get away for a weekend. One night only. But if you don’t want me to go—”
“Go pack your stuff.” Dad takes my hand from his shoulder and squeezes it. “Even if she weren’t here, I’d tell you to go. You don’t have to worry so much now I’m off the beer.”
“Are you sure?” I slide into the chair next to him to gauge if he’s sincere.
“Yes. I’m happy you’re agreeing to do this. Go… have some fun. And don’t worry about whoever put the sad look in your eyes.”
I stand and want to tell him there’s no-one to worry about, but I know better than to lie to him. “I’ll do my best,” I say and head to my room.
“Where’s the furthest you’ve travelled inland?” Chance asks me.
We’re two hours into the road trip, and I’m loving the rolling green hills of farms dotted with windmills and the fields painted yellow with canola in flower.
“Not far. I mean as a young girl, we travelled around since my dad drove trucks, but I barely remember and haven’t travelled much since I was a teenager.”
“You haven’t seen Uluru?” Adele asks.
“Nope.”
“An hour’s drive from here, and the landscape changes reminding you of central Australia. Red dirt, scattered saltbush, and kangaroos.”
I’m sitting in the middle seat in the back. Leaning forward, I place my arm on the back of Adele’s seat, so I can talk to them better. “What are you planning when you arrive in Broken Hill?”
“We’re staying at Zane’s, or we might camp out tonight. He has everything under control. But we’ll head out to Silverton tomorrow. There’s an artist I want to see, and I thought you’d like to meet some of the locals.”
Adele rolls her eyes at Chance. “Don’t get excited,” she says to me. “Mad Max was filmed there and for good reason.”
“Oh, okay. I don’t care what we do. I’m happy to be here and visit somewhere new.”
Chance catches my eye in the review mirror. “I’ve brought an extra case because I hope to pick up some art supplies to take back with me.”
“Art supplies? Why there?”
Adele laughs. “Because he’s weird. I call it a pile of junk he collects to make his so-called sculptures. I’ll get Silverton up on my phone, so you can see some of the local artists and what they do. Then you won’t be so surprised when we take you tomorrow.”
Two more hours pass, and I’m shocked by the vast nothingness. The road barely bends—one straight line heading to nowhere. The times when I checked my phone came up with SOS only. Perfect. Somewhere far away from Reef and with a guy who makes me smile with his voracious enthusiasm for life.
Out of the vast nowhere are rocky hills leading us around blind bends, and Adele points out goats too close to the road.
“Damn, they’re cute,” Chance says. I smile at his reflection in the rear-view mirror at the way his dimples deepen when he’s amused.
“Yeah, but not as much as bunnies,” I add.
“Nope. I’d love one of these.” He points to a kid follow
ing the mother and father on the edge munching the grass. Through the sunny haze, buildings hover in the distance, out in the middle of nowhere.
“Why here?” Looking out both windows, I’m failing to see the appeal with all the red dirt.
Chance shrugs. “As kids, Dad took us camping to different places. We met Zane out on a station one year when they opened up for families to camp and experience life on an outback farm. Zane, Kristen, and Steele made the experience far more fun than I think it would have been otherwise for kids our age. The station was owned by a family friend of Zane’s. What was that guy’s name?”
“Luke,” Adele says. “And the station was Whitehaven.”
“Yep. We saw him a couple of times before he went to boarding school in Adelaide. We met up with Zane on several occasions when his family visited Melbourne on holidays. Another camping trip, and then when we left school, we made the trip back here to the town and stayed with his family. We’d drifted over the years until sis, here, decided to play pen pals with him.”
“Zane and I never drifted,” Adele tells him. “We wrote letters until I was allowed a phone. Unlike you, I was never too busy for friends.”
“I’m glad you said friends.” He glances at her momentarily before looking back to the road where speed signs indicate to slow down before entering the town.
Adele glances over her shoulder to me and rolls her eyes. She frowns after a few seconds. “Hey. Don’t be put off by what you see. The people are the friendliest here than anywhere I’ve been. You won’t feel awkward at all.”
I give a nervous laugh. She seems to have the same intuition as her brother. I settle back in my seat and ignore thoughts of being out of my depth.
We pull up outside an expansive brown brick house. It’s different than the corrugated iron and tin roof houses surrounding it. He beeps the horn, and seconds later, Zane emerges through the wooden front door with Kristen and Steele.
“What took you?” Zane shouts out.
With overnight bags over our shoulders, we step onto a gravel path. I stand back while Zane and Chance hug with a standard three slaps on the back. When Chance moves in to hug Kristen, Zane gives Adele a peck on the cheek and hugs her a few seconds longer than he did his mate.
