Cocky Notes: A Hero Club Novel

by Leesa Bow

  “Did you know Reef before?”

  “No, but—”

  “Bernadette and I knew each other at school. We actually dated years ago. But your mother came on the scene, and I never saw her again.”

  “What? You knew each other?”

  “I didn’t recognise her at first with her hair all wet at the pool. It only took her a week to admit she’d always held a flame for me. She said I was the one who got away.” He chuckles. “I didn’t know I could feel like this again.”

  I sit down ready to listen to him. “Why didn’t you say something to me before?”

  “You’ve been distracted. We both have.”

  “I know, and I’m sorry. Is it why you’re wearing your prosthesis regularly?”

  He nods. “I want to go out with her more. Be the man by her side when we go out for dinner. I don’t want her to assist me.”

  My gut drops. I shouldn’t have doubted her. Now I understand why she was all fluttery around him. “I don’t think Bernadette sees you as a man with one leg. If she still holds a flame, she sees Peter Reynolds, high school heartthrob.”

  “Doesn’t change the fact I have one leg and can’t do the things I want.”

  “But you can do many other things. Modified. And the more you wear your prosthesis, the more capable you’ll be. You made limitations to your life. It’s up to you to break old habits and enjoy life without limits.”

  “You should be a life coach or something. And you need to take on your own advice.”

  “I try when I’m not busy.” I smile at him and top up his water glass.

  “I’m not talking about enjoying life. I’m talking about breaking old habits. No limitations, like the ones you impose for me.”

  “You’re not a limitation. We’re a team, remember?” I walk around and pat his shoulder.

  “A good team. You’ve been by my side long enough. Bernadette has opened my eyes to what I haven’t been doing and what you’ve been doing for me. Even if she weren’t here as much, I know what I need to do, so you can make a life. I want you to go out more with your friends. With Reef. I don’t want you having to be here checking on me.”

  The windows are open, yet it feels like there is no air in the room. My chest is tight. My hand rests on the spot where my heart races.

  “Have a drink,” Dad says. “And sit down. You look like you’re going to pass out.”

  He pushes the jug of water on the table toward me. Taking a glass from the cupboard, I sit opposite him and glug down water, doing what he asks.

  “As much as I’ve appreciated everything you do for me, I know you’ve been hiding away, using me as an excuse. I know because I’ve done it, too. When your mum left, you pushed everyone out of your world and wouldn’t let anyone close. We were both afraid of getting hurt again.”

  I pour another glass of water and chug it down.

  “We can’t live this way anymore. This Reef, he’s the closest I’ve seen any guy get to you. But I know there’s a ticking time bomb inside you. Know you’re waiting, and soon he’ll be sent packing like the others. If he’s not right for you, then it’s fate. But don’t push him away because you’re scared.”

  I drop my head to the table and lean in on my hands under my forehead. Defeated. “I don’t know how to change.” I take in a few deep breaths. “Problem is, he’s only having fun, too. We’re going to both end up hurt, and I have no way of slowing us down. We’re each falling as fast as the other even though we both know it’s temporary.”

  “How do you know?”

  “He told me in so many words.”

  Dad folds his arms over his chest and gives me a look of disapproval. “What does he expect from you?”

  “We’re only hanging out and having fun. We get on well together and are honest with each other. For now, it’s about taking it slow and getting to know each other.”

  “I see.”

  Even without looking at his expression, I know Dad doesn’t believe me.

  “So, when are we having a family meal together?”

  “Soon.”

  “Good. Bernadette is coming for dinner tonight. I meant to tell you earlier. Do we have enough for her as well?”

  I had two pieces of steak thawing on the bench. “Sure. I’ll get another steak out of the freezer. I did want to run something by you, though. Will Bernadette be around this weekend by any chance?”

  Chapter Seventeen

  MACY

  On a sand dune between high grasses I stand beside Reef as he assesses the waves with a surfboard tucked under his arm. Piles of seaweed dot the golden sand. Driftwood is scattered amongst nests of shells. I’ve never thought about art and being creative, but now with Reef, I feel connected to the ocean, and my mind is already thinking what I can do with what I find on the beach.

  “Do you want me to grab a chair from the tent for you to sit on?”

  I shake my head. “I’ll watch you a bit from the shore, then collect a few shells.”

  He takes my hand, and we step and slide together down the dune. The sand is hot and squeaky beneath our feet. Reef places a towel and bag containing water bottles and snacks on the flat sand, kisses my cheek, then runs toward the surf.

  Mesmerised, I take in his physique as he runs. The swing of his arms, the muscles contracting in his back, the lightness in his step, it’s as though running is a superpower. The way his golden locks blow in the wind reminds me of last night when I took a selfie of our heads on the pillow—a contrast to my long, dark hair and my fair skin against his tanned, firm body, our bare legs tangled in the tent.

  The tent.

  I was grateful to wake up to no neighbours this morning. Reef reassured me this portion of the beach was difficult to access and not popular, but after what went down last night, I’m glad no one heard our moans of pleasure and how many times I screamed his name.

  Before breakfast, he brought me down to the beach for a swim. I was glad for the cool saltwater to soothe tender bits because I know tonight will be more of the same.

  Reef dives into a wave, and I watch him disappear for a few seconds before surfacing on his board. He paddles out deeper, and I can’t help the nerves and excitement of watching him surf.

  He sits on his board and waits for the right wave. I witnessed him in action this morning after dawn, the glee in his eyes when connecting with the ocean—a relationship. Part of me wishes I also bonded with something with as much passion as Reef.

  He paddles faster, and I spy an oncoming wave. He decides to take it, springing to his feet, arms wide. I imagine every part of him humming with adrenaline. The ride lasts seconds before he’s dumped. I keep watching until he surfaces, grabs his board, scrambles up on it, and paddles out again.

  I wander closer to the shore and search the piles of shells, scattering pieces with my flip-flop to uncover the prettier ones. I collect a few in my hand along with some driftwood and take it back to our towels and continue to do more of the same for another hour.

  I wave out to Reef, but he doesn’t see me. After stripping off my sarong, I wade into the water. I’m waist-deep before we make eye contact, and he paddles closer.

  “My shoulders are burnt. I think I’ll go up and apply more sunscreen.”

  “Do you want to have a shot at surfing first?”

  “Hardly. I’m wearing a bikini.”

  “Then, take it off.”

  It was difficult enough to get into the black two-piece I purchased years ago and never wore. But Reef makes me feel sexy, and I desired to brave it with no one else around. Surfing, I’d have to have one hand on my breasts to support them.

  “My balance isn’t good.”

  “Give it a try even to kneel.”

  “I wouldn’t be able to get up on it in the water.”

  Reef slides off and steadies the board between us. He shows me where to position my palms. “Now push up, then throw a leg over. I’ll hold it still.”

  I try and fail.

  I try again
and manage to get my breasts in the way.

  I groan and give it one last shot.

  I wait for the next wave to pass and jump up, landing my top half over the board. My boobs are squashed beneath me. I’m nose to nose with Reef, and he decides now is a perfect time to kiss me.

  “You taste good, Mace.” He dives under the board, and I scream at him. “It’s okay, I got you,” he says from behind, both hands on the board to stop me from being flipped off when a wave floats the board up and back down again.

  “What are you doing?”

  “Admiring the view.”

  I want to curl up in a ball and cry at the thought of my rear raised on the board in this pathetic black bikini. He runs his hands along my inner thigh. His touch has me rearing, and at the same time, he pushes on my arse and assists my leg to rise.

  “Shit, Reef,” I scream and lie flat on the board clinging for dear life.

  He chuckles. “Good. You’re almost there.” I detect the strain in his voice as he’s supporting my rear, so I don’t fall off the board. “I’m going to push you up, and I want you to throw your leg over to the other side.” He counts down from three. I use all my strength and manage to straddle the board with my chest flat on it clinging for dear life. He moves around to the front and holds it while another wave threatens to undo all my hard work. “Push yourself up. I’ll keep it steady.”

  I raise myself a little and peep down to check my top.

  “Are you afraid I’ll see your boobs? Because after last night, I think I’ve seen every part of you.”

  “Shut up.”

  He raises a brow. “Look toward the beach. The dunes. Do you see anyone?”

  “No.”

  “Okay, then. It’s just you and me.”

  I push up, and sure enough, my breasts are out on show. I go to adjust myself and quickly grab hold of the board when it rocks. Reef makes his way to the side of the board and reaches up. “I want it off.” He tugs at the ties, and it comes loose. “Do you know how sexy it is to see my girl sitting on my board topless?”

  I’m speechless.

  In seconds, he’s pulled the fabric away from my wet skin. My hair clings to my face and shoulders, and I feel anything but sexy. “I need a moment.”

  Reef is gazing up at me like I’m a goddess, and he’s besotted with me. “Have you ever had sex on the beach? In the middle of the day?”

  “Of course not.”

  He holds onto the front of the board, and his feet drift underneath. He kicks us toward the shore. “Neither have I, but I want to right now.”

  I look around the beach. No sign of another soul. Still, I’m nervous.

  “Just you and me,” he says as though he can read my expression.

  Reef tips the board, and I fall sideways.

  My feet hit the ground, but not before I go under even though it’s thigh deep. “Why did you do that?” I splutter.

  He grins at me. “I like seeing the water trickle over your curves.” Fetching the board, he tucks it under his arm, takes my hand, and leads me to the shore, stopping where the water recedes into the ocean. He places the board on the sand and rolls down his saturated board shorts, his erection springing free.

  I gasp and look around again.

  He takes my chin in his hand and tilts my head, so I’m staring directly into his baby blues. His gaze lowers, taking his fill. “Your curves are perfect.”

  Leaning in, he kisses me once, twice, and it’s all the prompting I need before linking my arms around his neck to align our bodies together. His hands slide under my arms to my waist and out over the curve of my hips, around to my arse. He steps back, drops to his knees to slide my bikini bottoms over my thighs, and kisses my clit as he does.

  I don’t think I can remain upright on the beach while he goes down on me, so I drop to my knees beside him and roll onto my back.

  I hold out my hand and invite him by opening my legs. The sand is scratchy beneath me, yet I barely notice. Hand outstretched, I’m inviting Reef to make love to me, not have sex.

  The moment he hovers over me, our gaze connects before he sinks into me. I moan and adjust my rear before he pulls out and sinks deeper. Carefully at first, so I can accommodate his size, and I’m still a little sore after last night.

  Reef lowers to his elbows, moves in and out of me slowly, and kisses me so gently it’s almost unbearable. The old me desires to slap his naked butt and tell him to go faster and ride me into the sand until we’re sweaty and alternating between pleasure and pain until we can’t take anymore and scream each other’s names.

  The slowness with which our bodies move, caress, and tease is undoing every frail stitch holding the old me together. Every day Reef is transforming me, and I barely recognise who I am. His mouth moves to my neck, and then he kisses every inch of skin to my ear.

  He nibbles and breathes hot air, and I can’t help it. I lift my hips and match his rhythm, urging him to thrust harder until I come calling his name loud on my lips.

  “I love you,” he whispers in my ear before thrusting deep, shuddering, and falling limp on top of me.

  I don’t say it back.

  My heart’s beating hard against my ribs.

  I open my eyes to stare at the blue sky and see a black dot and enjoy the colours of my orgasm.

  The black dot moves.

  “Reef,” I croak. “What’s that?”

  He lifts his head and twists. “A bloody drone.” He spreads out over me. “Don’t lift your head.” His lips are on mine, both hands on the side of my face so I can’t move. I realise he’s protecting me. Covering as much of me as possible while his rear is on show for the drone to capture.

  Slowly, I relax into his kiss, allow my tongue to find his. His dick twitches inside of me, and I sense it growing. He breaks the kiss, lifts his head. “Can you see it now?”

  I peep out from under his blond hair. “No, I think it’s gone.”

  “Probably some teenagers from the next beach taking images of the coast or a guy looking for fishing spots.”

  “If it’s a video, then they’ll get a surprise.”

  He rolls off me and reaches for his shorts.

  “Where’s my top?”

  “I left it in the water.” He bends over and kisses each boob. “I told you I wanted you naked.”

  I want to yell at him, only my body is humming with the love we made together.

  Reef takes my hand and leads me to the water. “Best we get the sand off your beautiful arse.”

  I am naked on the beach for him.

  I am here out of my comfort zone for him.

  I’m changing who I am—for him.

  I might not have said those three little words, but my father always said, actions speak louder than words.

  Chapter Eighteen

  MACY

  The days leading up to Christmas are hot and hectic at Lombardi’s with dinners and work celebrations before people go on break over the festive season. Oliver asked me to work nights as we’re overbooked, and I agreed since Dad now has Bernadette to keep him company.

  He’s safe.

  Reef and I catch up during the mornings. It’s not the same since we came home from our weekend away. Whether it’s him pulling back after he mentioned those three little words and I gave him no response, or it’s me regaining the armour around my heart and not letting him in. But I sense a difference, especially since morning sex is back to the smacking of skin as we go at it for what it is—a craving of lust, not love.

  And in the extreme summer heat, everyone is a little crazy at this time of year. Even Oliver snapped at Dominic, his temper short with the pressure when the power went out for an hour or so yesterday.

  Thursday night, Reef comes in toward the end of my shift.

  “Hey,” I say, my heart picking up a notch. “A nice surprise to see you.”

  He smiles, but it doesn’t reach his eyes. “I thought we might catch up later. Maybe you could stay the night?”

  “To
night?” I croak. I’m so exhausted and sweaty. All I want is a cold shower and to fall into bed. I couldn’t even manage to starfish for him without falling asleep. “I have the day and night off tomorrow.”

  “I’m leaving tomorrow,” he announces, his expression deadpan. “Mum needs me to run some errands on the weekend. So, I changed my flight.” His gaze lowers in sync with my heart, and I know I’m failing to hide my disappointment.

  I swallow hard before speaking. “I understand.”

  Reef’s eyes meet mine, and his brow crinkles. “But we had plans.”

  “I know, but it’s family.” I rub his arm. “They’re probably excited to see you. It’s only over Christmas, and I’ll be here when you get back.”

  “And the New Year,” he adds. “Mum has arranged some surprise party, so I’m staying longer.” He steps forward and takes my hand. “I’m sorry, Mace, because I had plans for us.”

  “It’s fine,” I say again. “It will pass quickly, and it’s probably for the best you’re not here because I’ll be working extra shifts. We don’t close, remember? It’s the busiest time of year.” I’m convincing myself as much as him. Truth is having Reef around would help energise me to get me through the craziest time of year at Lombardi’s.

  “Can you stay tonight?” His eyes plead with mine.

  A lump forms in my throat, knowing my answer before my brain decides. I shake my head. My eyes pool with tears with exhaustion setting in. And knowing what he’s asking, I panic and blurt out, “Bernadette didn’t stay the night. And Dad had a few drinks before she went home. I need to go and check on him.”

  “Then do it, and then come to me.”

  A half-hour drive to my home, then and another half hour to Reef’s, I’ll fall asleep at the wheel. With one finger, I wipe under my eye, my throat burning holding back tears. I shake my head, unable to manage the words.

  “I already knew the answer before coming here,” he whispers. His blue eyes full of hurt. “I’ve built myself up for it all week because you’ve been different. You’re spooked, and you’re pulling away.”

  “I’m not spooked,” I lie.