Better Than Heaven (The Bachelor Brothers Book 1)

by Honey Holloway

  “Willow, you came!” Oliver says, putting down the jug and walking over to greet me with an unexpected hug. I almost drop my wine and I’m too surprised to hug him back, but the warmth of his body and the smell of his earthy cologne is enough to make me feel at home. I feel a strange tug toward him, an unexpercted sexual lurch in my stomach that makes me want to do something stupid like kiss him in front f everyone. When he pulls away, I’m red faced, embarrassed by my sudden rush of feelings for him as though everyone here knows what I’m thinking. He’s smiling and it makes me feel as though he’s actually happy to see me. Like he’s just been waiting for me to get here.

  “We were just about to start the writer’s circle, actually...come and sit with me since it’s your first time. You’re not nervous, are you?”

  The corners of my lips twitch.

  “Nah,” I say, though the cold welcome from the group has made me a little uncertain. I tell myself that I was imagining it. These people are my classmates. They’ll make an effort, I’m sure of it.

  “Good. Let’s sit down…”

  He grabs my wrist to lead me away and my skin tingles at his touch. I can’t remember ever touching him before tonight, but it feels so good to have his skin on mine. I’ve never had good enough friends to be much of a hugger or a toucher, but with his fingers curled around my wrist, I can see the appeal. I wonder if he can feel my heartbeat pulsing against his hand. I wonder if he’ll understand that it’s him that’s making my heart race a little faster. I wonder if he’ll take a hint and thread his fingers through mine…

  He doesn’t, but the room is cramped as people fight for places to sit, and even though he eventually gets us seated on the floor, I don’t mind one bit. I cross my legs, glad to be wearing trousers, and our knees brush against one another. I hold my breath, but he doesn’t move an inch. Our legs remain pressed together.

  “Does everyone have a drink?” Oliver addresses the room, grinning all the while. It’s easy now to see how easily likeable he is. When he’s in a room full of people who adore him, I can see that his friendly exterior isn’t as insincere as it comes across. He’s full of that American charm that has surpassed us Brits entirely, leaving us with a deadly combination of sarcasm and passive-aggressiveness. But then again, I suppose over there, they see us all as overly polite tea drinkers who love the Queen…

  Everyone settles themselves and looks at Oliver for further instruction. I can feel eyes lingering on me, and I wonder why Violet isn’t sitting with Oliver. She glares at me from afar and I duck my head. I’m not interested in confrontation tonight. I just want things to go well.

  “Thanks for coming, everyone! You know how much I love these nights...and since we’re all drinking something or other, let’s count this as pre-drinks…”

  Several of the boys cheer and everyone laughs, including me. It feels good to be a part of something, even if I still feel like I’m on the fringe of it all.

  “Before we get started...we have a new writer with us tonight. I know Willow hasn’t been to many of the social events since we started, so I thought I’d start us off with reading some of her writing. I passed you guys her short story that she wrote for a seminar this week as you came in through the door...so while we all enjoy a nice drink, we can read it over and then maybe give some feedback? Let’s chill out, people. It’s Friday...best night of the week to get our creative juices flowing.”

  Everyone murmurs in agreement and I can’t help blushing. I can’t believe he’s brought my story for everyone to read. When I look his way he leans in to whisper to me as everyone begins their contemplative reading.

  “I thought everyone deserved to be blessed with brilliance tonight,” he murmurs.

  I chuckle. “How long have you been sitting on that compliment?”

  “Oh, only for three years...since I first read your stories.”

  I’m blushing again. Is this flirting? In the case of a writer, there’s no higher compliment than someone praising your work. But this feels personal too...like he’s praising me as well. I watch as his eyes drag over my body and I feel the scorch of his gaze on my skin. He sees that I’m watching him and he gives me a slow, sultry smile before turning his face to the paper in his hand to read the story. Without him watching me so intently, it’s easier to breathe, giving me time to recover from the way he looked at me. Soon enough, though, I’m wishing he’d look at me again.

  I sit sipping my wine from a plastic party cup and watch the rest of the room get lost in my story. The harsh faces I saw around the room before seem to soften, as though my writing has changed their opinions of me. But when I look at Violet, she hasn’t even bothered to look at my writing. She’s chugging wine like it’s no one’s business and scowling to herself. I rake through my memories, trying to recall if I’ve done anything to upset her over the years. Maybe she’s just in a bad mood tonight...it’s none of my business, really. But I can’t get over the nagging feeling that I’ve done something to upset her.

  “Alright!” Oliver says as people begin to finish the story. “Let’s give people a little longer to finish up...but for those who have already finished, have a chat with someone in the room and see what they think!”

  Several people begin chatting and I rise to my feet, moving toward Violet before I can stop myself. I don’t know why I feel the need to go over there. I’d be much more comfortable sitting beside Oliver and chatting like before. But by the time I come to a halt next to her and she looks up at me, I realize there’s no going back.

  “I didn’t read the story,” she says coldly. I sip my wine and force a smile.

  “That’s okay. I wasn’t expecting my story to be on the agenda tonight anyway...I just came to mingle a little,” I reply. She folds her arms.

  “Why have you come up out of the woodwork all of a sudden?” she asks me. There’s no getting around the fact that she’s being rude to me. There’s no other way to interpret what she’s saying. I find myself stepping back defensively which is entirely unlike me.

  “I have a night off for once...I usually work evenings.”

  Violet raises her eyebrows. “Right. Well most people don’t just show up after three years and try to wriggle their way in. It’s kind of rude, you know.”

  I blink several times. I don’t know how I thought this conversation would go, but it certainly wasn’t like this. It’s clear to me now that she doesn’t like me. Maybe she finds something about me offensive...I’ve heard it all before. Girls like me get a lot of stick. I’m plus-sized, blue-haired and plain speaking. Girls like Violet seem to hate those things about me because they’re narrow-minded. I pity her, in a way. It’s like she wants me to tick a bunch of boxes in order to be likeable; skinny, pretty, quiet and...well, ordinary. I look at her and see a beautiful woman with insecurities inbuilt. She’s nothing like me, which is fine. But she’s determined to hate the differences between us...and perhaps that’s why we’ll never get along.

  “Sorry if you find it rude. That wasn’t my intention,” I tell her, managing to uphold my smile. “I’d love to hang out with you guys more...it’s just hard since I have two jobs. My loan doesn’t cover my rent…”

  “So you’re basically saying you’re too busy for us,” Violet says with a sniff. She raises her glass to her lips and takes a long sip, knowing I’m stumped as to what to say. When she swallows, her lips purse once again. “Don’t force yourself, Willow. We’ll all be fine without you here.”

  I wasn’t expecting the comment to hurt so much, but somehow, it does. I’ve never had someone act so bitterly toward me for no reason. Other than my father, that is. I can see hatred in her eyes as she stares me down. She’s waiting for a reaction from me and she might be about to get one. Tears sting my eyes and I hide my emotions by taking a sip of wine.

  “Alright,” I say eventually, too wounded to come up with a quick response. “I’ll leave you to it.”

  I return to Oliver’s side, feeling like a child hiding behind their mother’s
legs. In only a matter of minutes, Violet has taken my mood from high to lower than low. I can’t help looking around the room now and wondering if everyone here feels the same way as she does. No one is paying me much mind - why would they when they’re surrounded by their friends? - but do they despise me being here? Are they secretly wishing they weren’t stuck here, reading my writing, breathing my air? Violet certainly seems to feel that way. In fact, the second I sit down, I watch as she disappears from the room entirely, as though she can’t even bear to be in the room with me anymore.

  “Alright, Willow?” Oliver asks me, his cheery smile stuck in place. “What were you and Vi talking about?”

  I could tell him. I could tell him that his girlfriend has a problem with me and then he might ask me to leave. But I have as much right to be here as anyone else. I was invited by the host. He’s been asking me to come for years, so what’s wrong with me accepting the invitation? I roll my shoulders back and swallow back my tears. I can’t allow her to get to me.

  “Nothing,” I tell him, “Nothing at all.”

  Chapter Four

  Oliver

  The party is in full swing now, and I haven’t seen Willow in some time. I saw her chatting to a few people from our screenwriting class earlier, but now, she’s not visible in my living room or kitchen area. I don’t think she’d go home without telling me...so where is she?

  I’ve been distracted since she arrived. I’ve felt the need to talk to her all night and yet, the first opportunity I’ve had to pin her down, she’s somewhere where I can’t find her. As soon as the writer’s circle meeting finished, she went to top up her wine and she’s been out of my reach ever since.

  I want to get her alone. I want somewhere to talk where it’s just me and her. For once, the hustle and bustle of a great party can’t entice me. Everyone here is having a good time, but me. I’m standing with Violet and our other friends, half listening to their conversation about Sabine’s class while I keep an eye out for Willow.

  “What’s wrong with you?” Violet hisses as she nudges my elbow. “It’s like you’re not even here.”

  “Sorry...I’m just distracted.”

  “You’re not drunk enough,” our friend Hugo says, his scraggly hair covering up the glazed over look in his eyes. He’s probably drunk enough for the both of us. “Have another beer. Hey, where’s your friend? The newbie?”

  “Willow?” I ask, brightening a little. “Hey, wasn’t her story great? She’s so talented. Everyone in our seminar group is obsessed with her work.”

  Hugo snorts. “Are you serious? You’re getting hyped over her? Dude, she’s totally lame.”

  I blink several times. “What? You think so?”

  “Ugh, please,” Alice butts in, rolling her eyes as Hugo swings an arm around her shoulders. “She just came here to show off. Obviously she’s good at writing...big deal. Like, she literally just wanted to sit here and listen to us all praising her.”

  “That’s not true...she didn’t even know we’d be reading her work tonight. She’s just trying to be friendly.”

  “Face it, Oliver, she’s a snob,” Violet says sourly. “She acts like she’s too good for the rest of us. The way she always lords over us because she has a job at the cafe and we’re all just focussing on our studies...it’s so irritating. I don’t know why you like her at all.”

  I scowl. “Now hold on a minute...she’s not like that at all. She has a good work ethic, sure, but-”

  “Hey didn’t she have a go at you the other day for not turning up to class?” Violet points out, taking a smug sip of her wine. Alice groans.

  “Oh God, she’s the worst. Such a suck-up. It’s no wonder she gets such good grades. I bet she’s tight with all the tutors…” Alice says. “Look, it’s no big deal, Oliver. Just don’t ask her here again, yeah? She doesn’t fit in.”

  “You guys haven’t even given her a chance!” I say, raising my voice a little louder than I should, but I can’t help it. This conversation is driving me mad. “She’s been nothing but lovely all evening. Hugo, she was really helpful with feedback for your poetry…”

  “Are you kidding? She thinks she knows better than me...her poetry sucks,” Hugo says defensively. “She had nothing good to say about it.”

  “You’re twisting everything…”

  Violet rolls her eyes. “Get a grip. You can’t force us to like her. She’s never going to be one of us. Just let it go.”

  I turn on my heel and walk away. Hugo’s laughter rings in my ears as I push past my classmates. I can feel anger boiling in my blood. I don’t know what’s happening to me lately. I’ve heard them joking about Willow in the past. Just the occasional comment here and there that I’ve never agreed with, but never argued with either. And now, it makes me so angry to hear them talking about her that way. I need to get out of here. I need to talk to someone sane.

  There’s a balcony adjoining my living area that overlooks the city. There are a few smokers out there, but they disperse when they see me heading out. I close the sliding door behind me and dial my sister’s number. She’ll talk some sense into me.

  She picks up after several rings. “Thank God you called. I’m bored out of my mind over here. It’s late where you are...are you having a party?”

  I breathe in the cool air, trying to calm myself down. “Yeah.”

  “Well what are you ringing me for, then? You need something? Or are you going to drunkenly tell me how much I mean to you?”

  “Tammy, listen...I need some advice.”

  “Alright, straight to the chase then.”

  “It’s about a girl.”

  Tammy falls silent for a moment and then she laughs. “Oh man, you took me by surprise then...you want to talk about girls? What makes you think I can help?”

  “Well...you are one? And you’ve dated more girls than I have.”

  “You’re the one in a long-standing casual relationship with your best friend…”

  “Is that what you’d call it?”

  “Well it depends whose perspective you look at it from...from where she’s standing, she probably thinks you guys are a thing. I mean, she’s probably expecting that you’re official, even if you haven’t confirmed it.”

  I scrunch my eyes closed, running a hand through my hair. “Well...then I might have made a mistake.”

  “Go on.”

  I sigh, leaning against the balcony barrier. “I’ve found someone I like. And she’s great. Which I keep telling Violet...and now it makes sense why she hates this girl so much.”

  “Oh, Oliver...I thought you were meant to be the smooth one in this family? Don’t you understand girls at all?”

  “I don’t need a lecture...I need you to tell me what to do.”

  Tammy sighs. “Tell me about the girl. The one you like.”

  “Willow? Well...she’s gorgeous. And so cool...she’s got blue hair and a great sense of style...she’s a hard-worker and she always says things as they are...she’s fearless. And one of the best writers I’ve met here.”

  Tammy sighs dreamily. “Sounds like you really admire her. Look, I know Violet is your best friend...but I’ve been waiting a long time to hear you say that you’re into someone. Like, for real, and not just that you think someone’s cute or you want to have sex with them.”

  “Have I ever said anything like that?”

  “Man, you were a menace before you went over to England, trust me. Anyway...I know you don’t get feelings. Or at least not that you’ve admitted before. So you’ve got to go for it. And end things with Violet...like, ASAP. She’s only going to get her heart broken. And that means being discreet too...if Willow likes you back, that is.”

  “So...who do I talk to first?”

  “I guess it depends on whether this girl likes you back...just don’t do anything stupid or rash, okay? Think this through...you’ve got a big heart, but you’re not always the most sensitive soul. You care about them both, but Violet’s your best friend. You have to make s
ure not to damage her heart. Because from what you’ve told me she’s kind of mean sometimes...but it’s because she’s protective of you. She wants you for herself, Olly...and she can’t have you. You need to make that clear.”

  I sigh. Tammy’s right. She always is. “Alright...I’ll do that. I’ll speak to both of them. Thanks, Tammy...I owe you one.”

  “Hey, it’s fine...when you come back over to the US, you can make it up to me by getting me out of the house once in a while. I’m going crazy over here.”

  “I know.” I pause. “I miss you, Tammy.”

  I hear her breath catch in her throat. But then she laughs. “Alright, you’re entering soppy territory now. Go find Willow. And don’t mess it up.”

  I chuckle quietly. “I’ll do my best. Thank you, Tammy.”

  “Don’t sweat it. Hey, have a beer for me. And let me know how it goes.”

  She hangs up before I can and I sigh. There’s still things I want to say to Tammy. I want to let her know that she’s not alone out in America with Mom. I’ll always be there for her when she needs me. But she’s right. I need to fix the mess I’ve made on this side of the pond. Tomorrow, I’ll call her and talk properly.

  But right now, I want to speak to Willow.

  I head back inside and there’s still no sign of her. Unless she went home, there’s only one other place she can be. I push through the crowds, hoping not to see Violet on my way. I manage to make it to my bedroom. There’s a light on in the room so I assume it’s safe to enter. I slip into the room as quietly as I can.

  I catch sight of her right away. She’s sitting on my bed with her back to me. I lean against the door with a smile. I must be in deep if just seeing the back of her head can make me smile so much.

  “Hey. What’re you doing sneaking in my room? You’re supposed to wait for an invite,” I say jokingly. Willow turns to look at me and my face falls. Her eyes are filled with tears.

  “I’m sorry...I didn’t mean to be rude...I just wanted a bit of privacy.”