29 Dates

by Melissa de la Cruz

  “Um, what was Austin Velasco talking to you about?” Kaylee had beelined across the cafeteria. The day wasn’t even over yet, and Jisu was ready for a break from Kaylee.

  “He told me that he’s a tutor and can help me out if I need it.”

  “That’s really nice of him. Austin is always so nice to the new kids,” Kaylee said. But the way she said it sounded like she was assuring herself more than Jisu.

  “Hey, Dave! Dave Kang!” Kaylee shouted. A guy standing a few tables down turned around. He was tall like Austin, though not quite as tan, and had dark eyes and jet-black hair with a sharp fade. He was wearing a Wick-Helmering Lacrosse hoodie.

  “Dave, this is Jisu, the new international student in our year. She’s also Korean!”

  The strange uneasiness Jisu had felt in Ms. Hollis’s class returned all over again. Anxiety? Embarrassment? Frustration? It was none of those things, but also a bit of all of those things. Jisu didn’t know where to look, so she stared down at her hands.

  “Kaylee, you’re so embarrassing,” said a student at the table next to them. “Just because they both happen to be Korean doesn’t mean they have to be best friends.”

  Jisu looked over at him and felt relief. There was clarity in what he was saying.

  “Landon! What do you mean?” Kaylee looked embarrassed, but not like she understood for what.

  “This is like when you suggested that Jack and I date just because we happen to be the only two gay people you know.”

  Jisu covered her mouth with her hand and smiled, embarrassed for Kaylee and grateful for Landon. She looked up at Dave and saw he was also trying not to laugh. Landon was speaking the truth, and hearing it chipped away at the uneasiness Jisu had felt since English class.

  “That’s not true! Also, aren’t you guys dating for real now?”

  “That’s beside the point.” Landon waved Kaylee off and turned his attention back to his friends.

  “Well, you’re welcome for introducing you to your high school sweetheart!” Kaylee shouted.

  Jisu and Dave exchanged a look, acknowledging the awkwardness, and both were unsure how to free themselves from it.

  “So, should we do our secret, extra-complicated, very Korean handshake?” Dave sat down at the table. Jisu laughed, and the rest of the uneasiness disappeared instantly. Thank god someone in this school has a sense of humor.

  “So, you’re a fellow hanguk saram,” Jisu said.

  “Sorry, a what?” Dave looked confused.

  Did he not know any Korean? She had wondered what it would be like to grow up Korean American. Which aspects of Koreanness did one hold on to and which aspects did one have less of a grasp on?

  “Hanguk saram. Korean person! Dave, do you not speak any Korean?” Jisu asked.

  “Oh! No, I know a little bit. I just got thrown off. I’m not used to hearing it a lot, especially not at school,” he said.

  “Do your parents speak Korean?” Jisu asked.

  “Sometimes. It’s mostly English. Sometimes Konglish,” he said.

  “Konglish?” Jisu asked, bewildered.

  “Yeah, you know. Korean mixed with English.”

  Here was Dave Kang, one of just a handful of students that looked like Jisu, whose presence was enough to make her feel a bit more comfortable at Wick-Helmering, but he was wildly different from her.

  The students started to get up and herded their way to the next class. It was the end of the lunch period.

  “See you around, hanguk saram,” Dave said as he walked away.

  Jisu smiled. His pronunciation was clunky at best, but he still owned it. Had Dave’s parents immigrated to the States, or had his grandparents made the move one generation before them? Did his family eat Korean food at home? All the time or only sometimes? Did they celebrate chuseok and eat seawood soup on birthdays?

  Jisu’s phone dinged. It was a text from Austin. A jolt of energy shot through her fingers as she swiped the notification open.

  Hey, it’s your new tutor. Want to watch a movie this Friday and go to Bo’s Diner? The movie should be a good English lesson.

  “Who are you texting with?” Kaylee asked, suddenly reappearing and in Jisu’s face again. This girl was taking her job as class buddy a little too seriously. “Oh, my god, did Austin text you?” Kaylee peered at Jisu’s phone.

  “Yeah, I guess he wants to hang out this Friday and watch a movie.” Jisu shrugged. She didn’t want to alienate the one person who was helping her out at school. Kaylee had gushed about plenty of boys within the first ten minutes of their meeting, but she seemed to be crushing particularly hard on Austin.

  “Well, that’s nice of him, I guess,” Kaylee said icily.

  “Maybe he’ll bring his friends—”

  “Bo’s Diner is everyone’s hangout spot. There will definitely be other people there. I’ll probably be there.” Kaylee’s initial warm and bubbly welcome was now unceremoniously snappy and cold. “Why...did you think he was asking you out on a date?”

  The thought hadn’t even occurred to Jisu.

  “Honestly, I didn’t even think it until you—”

  “Austin Velasco does not just go on dates,” Kaylee declared.

  “All right, it’s not a date.” Jisu repeated Kaylee’s words. That seemed to do the trick. Kaylee backed off and scurried away to her next class.

  Not a date. Jisu had said it to get Kaylee off her back, but now she wondered if Austin had meant to ask her on a date. A real seon, set up naturally, without a matchmaker pulling the strings like a marionette master.

  What made a date a date anyway? And if it was so not a date and Austin was so not the type to ask girls on dates, why was Kaylee so bothered by it?

  JULY 16, SUMMER BREAK

  DATE NO. 5

  NAME: Kim Jungho

  * * *

  INTERESTS: Electronics Design, Golf, ’90s Rock

  * * *

  Parent Occupations:

  Housewife and head of various charities;

  Music manager

  * * *

  Jungho: All right, so you have to hear my start-up idea. I have, like, a million, but I’m really confident about this one.

  Jisu: Okay, shoot!

  Jungho: So, you know how everyone is overworked and complaining about how tired they are?

  Jisu: Yeah, I follow.

  Jungho: Have you heard of these super-progressive companies and tech start-ups with a lot of money who install fancy nap pods for their employees?

  Jisu: It sounds familiar. That actually sounds so nice.

  Jungho: Right? Those nap pods are usually like a perk and a way for those companies to attract new employees.

  Jisu: Okay, so what’s your point?

  Jungho: Well, those nap pods are way fancier and more gimmicky than they need to be. So my idea is to introduce a portable and low-maintenance nap pod.

  Jisu: Okay. I don’t think I even really know what a regular nap pod looks like, but what’s the difference? It wouldn’t be less comfortable?

  Jungho: No, not at all. Same cushiony features, except you can bring this pod with you. Or companies can buy the portable versions en masse.

  Jisu: What’s it made of?

  Jungho: I’m thinking cotton, nylon, polyester. It’s affordable.

  Jisu: And how big is it?

  Jungho: Big enough for one person to fit in and recline comfortably.

  Jisu: Can I be honest with you?

  Jungho: Yes, of course! I want to hear your thoughts—good or bad or both. I’m all ears.

  Jisu: It sounds like you’re just describing a tent.

  Jungho: I don’t think you really get the full picture.

  Jisu: But doesn’t it kind of sound like you’re describing a tent?

  Jungho: It would have certain features that would make it more
than “just a tent.” This is just the start of an idea. You don’t have to go poking holes all over it. Besides, what would you know? I’ve interned for the top VCs in Korea, and next summer I’m going to intern at the Twitter campus in San Francisco.

  Jisu: You asked for my opinion—I’m just being honest!

  Jungho: Whatever.

  6

  “Dressing up for your date?” Mandy asked as Jisu checked her reflection in the mirror.

  “It’s not a date. We discussed this,” Jisu said. “We even consulted your magazines and their online quizzes.”

  “Right, but there is one rule that trumps it all,” Mandy said.

  “And what’s that? I didn’t realize you were the authority on dating, Mandy.” Jisu took off her sweater and tried a different one. Did the peach-colored one look better with her skin tone, or was the bright blue better? Why did it even matter? Why did she care?

  “If you’re overthinking it, which you clearly are—this is your third outfit change now—then it’s certainly a date, at least in your mind.” Mandy smiled mischievously. Date or no date, having Mandy around only made Jisu more anxious about seeing Austin.

  “Maybe I should cancel.” Jisu sighed. “I have a lot of homework. I don’t have time and I should be studying anyway.”

  “No!” Mandy put her hands on Jisu’s shoulders. “You’ve been working all week and you deserve a break. Plus I want to hear everything that happens.”

  Jisu twiddled with the hem of her royal blue sweater. It was a striking color that made her feel confident and like her best self. She did want to see Austin, in the sense that she wanted to get to know her peers and make friends. At least she admitted that much to herself.

  Jisu put her DSLR in her bag and walked out of her room. Mandy followed her downstairs and sat on the bottom step.

  “Leaving already? Isn’t your date not for another two hours?” she asked.

  “I’m going to walk around the city with this.” Jisu held up her camera. She snapped a candid photo of Mandy on the staircase.

  “No pictures!” Mandy yelled, and dramatically covered her face as if she were a famous celebrity being chased by the paparazzi. Jisu turned on the flash and snapped some more, and the two of them fell over laughing.

  * * *

  Jisu didn’t expect to work up a sweat from simply walking around the city, but the hills of San Francisco were steeper than she’d realized. Still, she loved the curvature of the streets. It reminded her of the winding streets of Itaewon, where she’d wander around to photograph impressive views of Seoul with the Namsan Tower looming not too far in the distance. Jisu weaved in and out of similarly narrow alleys and major streets, capturing the everyday pedestrians of San Francisco walking from point A to point B: an old bag lady pushing along her cart of belongings, a jogging father who was running with the stroller that held his cooing baby and several adorable dogs being walked by their respective owners.

  She drank in the views from every angle and reached the top of Lombard Street just in time to capture the sun as the final golden rays of the day poured over the city.

  She sent a photo of the view to Euni and Min.

  Wish you guys were here with me. Miss you lots xox

  Jisu checked her notifications. There was an unread text from Kaylee.

  KAYLEE: Are you still seeing Austin today?

  JISU: Yup! On my way to the theater now. Not a date. Lol.

  KAYLEE: Of course it’s not—who said it was?

  Woof. Kaylee was still feeling some type of way about Jisu’s solo time with Austin.

  JISU: Omg, Kaylee. I was just joking! I’ll ask him what he thinks about you.

  KAYLEE: !!! Yes pls. But don’t be too obvious. And let me know what he says.

  JISU: Of course! Okay, on the tram now. Let’s hope I don’t miss my stop.

  Kaylee sent Jisu three prayer hands emojis, and she knew they were all good.

  This is not a date. This isn’t like any of the seons I’ve been on. I’m just hanging out with a new friend, who just happens to be really cute and charming, who’s also Kaylee’s crush. It’s not a big deal. It’s not a date. Not. A. Date.

  “Hey!” Austin walked over to Jisu just as she walked through the theater doors. “What’s this?” He pointed to her camera bag.

  “It’s not a date,” Jisu blurted without even thinking. She immediately covered her mouth, wanting to die. If lightning struck her dead right there, in that moment, she would be more than okay with it.

  Austin looked stunned for a second, but immediately broke into laughter. “Ouch, Jisu. You sure you’re okay being seen in public with me?” He was so gracious and charming. Jisu didn’t know if that made her feel better or worse.

  “Oh, my god, I’m so sorry.” She could feel her face getting red. And the more she thought about how much she was blushing, the warmer her face got. It was mortifying.

  “Girl, you need to chill.” Austin put his hands on Jisu’s shoulders as if to calm her down, but she only became hyperconscious about how close he was to her.

  “I think some of Kaylee’s neuroticism’s rubbing off on you.”

  “Sorry,” Jisu said. “I’m just so new to everything, I’m even nervous about making friends.” Maybe he would buy this excuse.

  “I get it. I get it.” There wasn’t a trace of worry on his face. He carried himself with an air of unbothered confidence.

  Jisu followed Austin as he moved seamlessly from the ticket booth to the concessions to their seats. By the time they sat down, any trace of embarrassment she’d felt had all but disappeared. They were simply two new friends watching a movie together. Jisu visualized her nerves, all jittery and shaky, forming a tidal wave and slowly receding from her mind. The previews started playing, and she leaned back into her seat, finally at ease.

  About halfway through the movie, the tidal wave of nerves appeared again. Every time Jisu laughed at a funny scene, she could sense Austin stealing glances and smiling at her.

  What does it mean? Is that what normal friends do?

  She’d never felt as hyperaware of every movement she made when she’d gone to the movies with Euni or Min. But she hadn’t felt this way on any of her seons either.

  You need to relax, Jisu thought. New country, new city, new friends. Anyone would feel nervous. This isn’t a date. Jisu Kim, you are not on a date!

  When the credits rolled, Jisu let out a deep breath. The rest of her body followed suit—the muscles in her neck, back and shoulders released. She didn’t realize how tense she had been during the entire movie. Sitting next to a cute boy in the dark for two hours while tempering your thoughts was exhausting. All she wanted to do was go home, edit her photos and pass out.

  “That was fun,” Austin said. He stood close to Jisu. She could see the individual threads running through his shirt, and he could probably see the same in hers. Austin had the slightest tan line around his eyes that you could only notice if you were inches away from his face. What details did he notice? Jisu took a step back. Did he always stand so close to whomever he was talking to?

  “You hungry?” he asked. “C’mon, let’s grab a bite at Bo’s.”

  He didn’t even ask if she wanted to go or not, just if she was hungry. It was all so cavalier, so casual. But to her, every stop from the theater out to the parking lot felt significant—like it was all leading to something. Jisu imagined waves of energy undulating from her shoes and onto the concrete with every step she took.

  And then she heard it. The collective jansori from her parents and Linda echoed in her mind. What did you do all day? What progress have you made? Time is running out faster and faster. She should say no, go home and chip away at all the homework she had. You’re already out. By the time you got home, you’d be so tired you’d go straight to bed anyway. It’s rude to say no. How else are you supposed to make friends? H
er thoughts drowned out the jansori. Jisu let Austin take her hand and lead her away.

  In the parking lot, other couples, both young and old, got into their respective cars and drove off into the night. Austin opened the passenger door of his car for Jisu and closed it gently when she got in. He’s being a gentleman, like any good person would, Jisu told herself. But another wave of nerves came crashing back into the folds of her brain. Jisu let herself indulge in the nervous excitement. If this were a seon, it would be the first one she was genuinely thrilled about.

  The tide of excitement pulled away just as quickly as it had come in when Austin and Jisu pulled up to the diner. Austin’s crew of friends were already seated at a booth by the window and waved at them.

  “This is my friend Jisu. She just transferred to Wick.” Austin introduced her to the group. Kaylee was right about Bo’s. The two of them were really just hanging out as friends after all. Jisu wondered if she had been imagining the tension from the last two hours.

  It was true. They were simply two new friends spending time together, Jisu had said so herself. Still, she detected a small sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach. I’m hungry, she thought and focused on the menu.

  “Jisu, right? You’re the new girl!” Jisu had been staring so intently at the menu, she’d hardly noticed the two blond girls in matching cheerleader uniforms sitting across from her.

  “I’m Jamie and this is Tiffany.” Next to Jisu’s petite frame, the two girls looked straight up Amazonian with their broad shoulders and toned arms. Jamie’s hair was up in a high ponytail and Tiffany’s was in braided pigtails. They weren’t sisters, but they could be twins. Their movements were so synced that Jisu wondered how synchronized they looked when they were in cheer squad mode.

  “We just came from practice, so we’re ready to eat everything,” Jamie said just as the waitress showed up with an entire tray of food. There was a plate of pasta, two baked potatoes, an omelet, french fries, a plate of grilled vegetables and a cheesy quesadilla.