Break You

by Jennifer Snyder

  I grinned at him. “Guess I’m not like most chicks then, huh?”

  Tapping to open Slacker, I chose a station I thought he might like—Party Rock. Music filled the apartment, soaking up all the silence and awkwardness that had been festering in the space, and I felt myself relax.

  “Can I help you with anything?” I asked. I leaned against the counter and gazed at everything he’d set out. “What’s this stuff?” I picked up a glass jar that looked like it held some sort of dip inside. It was creamy and tan.

  “Hummus dip,”

  “What the heck is that?” I glanced at the side label, which said it was creamy garbanzo bean dip.

  “You’ve never had it before?”

  I shook my head. “No.”

  “It’s the best. Spread it on some crackers and your mouth will be in heaven.” He winked. “That’s our appetizer tonight.”

  “Hmm, I’ll take your word for it and try a bite, but I’m not making any promises I’ll like it,” I said.

  “Oh you will.” There was a slight edge of cockiness to his tone that made me smile.

  Once Jason finished chopping things up and tossing the salad, he set it in the fridge, claiming it would be best served chilled. He then got to work on spreading some hummus onto a cracker for me.

  “Open,” he insisted.

  I opened my mouth and he slipped a smothered cracker in. The taste was surprising. It had a little kick to it, and the texture was creamy and smooth.

  “What do you think?” he asked.

  “I don’t know.” I took another bite and chewed for a moment before swallowing. “It’s one of those things that I’m not sure of. It’s not horrible, but I need a few more bites to decide if I actually like it.”

  Jason laughed. “I love this stuff. It was my grandma’s favorite. She liked to spread it on whole-wheat crackers like this and sit on her back porch eating it while enjoying the view.”

  There was sadness in his voice that tore at the edges of my heart. I hated he’d lost someone he obviously had loved so dearly. Then I remembered he’d lost his father right after we’d graduated high school, too. Sadness and loss had touched him and his mother so many times it made me glad I was helping to bring a little happiness into both their lives, even though our baby hadn’t been planned and our start had been slightly rocky.

  After eating our appetizer and then our awesome salad, Jason moved on to dessert. I watched as he cut a large bowl of strawberries and rinsed them off. He twisted the lid off a container of chocolate hazelnut spread and began to coat each strawberry slice heavily. A little got on his finger and I stared, captivated, as he brought it to his mouth and sucked it off.

  “Look good?” he asked. He licked along his bottom lip and held my stare.

  “Huh?” I had no clue if he was being arrogant and asking if he looked good licking chocolate hazelnut whatever it was off his finger, or if he was asking if his dessert of choice looked good. So, I played dumb. “Does what look good?”

  He raised an eyebrow at me. “The dessert.”

  “Oh, yeah, it does,” I said. Heat crept across my cheeks and down my neck.

  Jason slid his finished masterpiece between us with a proud smile. I reached out to grab one and pop it in my mouth, but he stopped me.

  “Nope, let me,” he insisted.

  A shiver went through me from his tone, low and demanding. A slow smile built on his face as he reached out and carefully picked up a strawberry. I licked my lips in anticipation, still feeling the lingering sensation of shivers sliding along my spine. Jason leaned in to me. His scent filled my nostrils at the same time the energy between us zinged to life even more. I sank my teeth into the smothered berry and an explosion of sorts happened across my tongue. The creaminess of the chocolate mixed with the hint of hazelnut along with the sweetness of the strawberry awoke each of my taste buds individually. How had I lived so long without tasting this goodness?

  “Good?” Jason asked.

  A little moan escaped me and I felt my cheeks heat from it. “Very good,” I said quickly.

  His finger swiped the corner of my mouth and I froze, praying he wasn’t going to be all creepy-gross like some guys were when they licked stuff off their finger after wiping it off the girl’s face. Thank goodness that wasn’t what Jason did. Instead, he lightly brushed his thumb across the edge of my bottom lip.

  My breath caught in my throat as I waited for him to lean in and kiss me. His blue eyes darkened and I heard him exhale softly. This was it. This was the moment when we would kiss and then things would get out of control. One thing would lead to another, and then we’d end up in my bed together, tangled in the sheets. A tiny prick of fear stabbed at my heart. What if sex felt different now that I had a baby growing inside me? Would Jason be able to feel it? Would I?

  The darkness washed out of Jason’s eyes and his hand dropped to his lap. My heart sank. Why hadn’t he kissed me? That was the moment…and he’d let it pass.

  “Let’s play a game,” he said, breaking the thick silence slowly being crafted between us.

  “What sort of game?” I asked. I reached out and grabbed another strawberry. Popping it in my mouth, I let the bliss on my tongue distract me from my insecure feelings bubbling to the surface of my mind.

  “A question game.” He grabbed himself another berry. “Let’s play Would You Rather.”

  I smirked at him. “I haven’t played that game in forever. Not since high school.”

  “So, let’s play it now.” There was a dare echoing through his words. “I’ll ask first. Would you rather go without Internet or a car for a month?”

  Picking up another berry, I took a bite and thought for a second before answering. “Internet, easy. I don’t think I could handle bumming rides from people for a whole month, I would feel too out of control and like a loser if I had to do that,” I said. “Okay, would you rather be blind or deaf?”

  He leaned against the counter and cocked his head at me. “Deaf. There’s too much I want to see before I die, but loads of shit I wish I didn’t have to hear.” A smirk twisted his features as though he were proud of his clever answer. I laughed at him. “All right, would you rather eat a stick of butter or snort a tablespoon of salt?”

  “What the hell kind of question is that?” I scrunched up my face.

  He shrugged his shoulders. “A question. Answer.”

  “Eat a stick of butter, I guess. Snorting salt seems like it would burn horribly bad.” I shifted on my feet and then decided to hoist myself up on the counter to sit. “Would you rather be strong or super fast?”

  “Strong. I don’t want to be super fast at anything.” A shit-eating grin twisted his lips at his sexual innuendo. My stomach clinched at the sight. “Would you rather have sex on the beach at night or have sex in a park in broad daylight?”

  A tingle stabbed through my stomach. My face felt entirely too hot all the sudden. “Wow, this game just took a turn,” I said.

  “You didn’t expect it to stay clean for long, did you?” he asked. There was a devious glimmer in his eyes that warmed my lower stomach. “Besides, it was your strong or super fast question that put me on this train of thought. So, what’s your answer, Blaire?” He raised an eyebrow at me.

  The way my name slid from his lips, the way he was looking at me mixed with his proximity, kicked my libido into overdrive. “Park, during the day,” I said.

  “You surprised me. Isn’t sex on the beach something every girl wants to try at least once?” he asked.

  “Not me. Sand is too coarse. I wouldn’t want it rubbing against my delicate areas,” I said. I tucked a strand of hair behind my ear and swallowed hard. If he wanted to amp this game up some, then I had to think of something good, something that would shock him. And then one came to me. “Would you rather have sex with the lights on or lights off?”

  He reached out and grabbed a strawberry. I watched him and his unfazed expression as he popped it into his mouth. I’d forgotten the bowl
was even there. “Lights on, I like to see what I’m doing right.” He winked as he chewed.

  Damn it. My question hadn’t fazed him at all. It was like he’d been expecting it.

  “My turn,” he insisted. “Would you rather pay for sex or get paid for sex?”

  I bit my bottom lip, thinking of an answer. Wow. What a question, he was good at this. “Paid for sex.” I locked eyes with him.

  His eyes flashed. “Would you like to elaborate on that further?”

  “Nope.” I reached for another strawberry. “Would you rather give up masturbation or never receive oral sex ever again?” My face flamed as soon as the words fell from my lips, but if he was going to take this game south then so could I. I bit into my strawberry, praying my face wasn’t as red as it felt.

  Jason nodded. There was a large grin on his face when I finally risked a glance at him. “Masturbation and pray like hell I never hit a long dry spell,” he said plain and simple. “Was that an offer?”

  I glared at him. “It was a question. Part of the game.”

  Jesus, he was getting to me. This game was. My heart was racing. Jason hoisted himself up onto the counter beside me. My eyes zeroed in on the muscles in his forearms as he did so, and I felt that warmth in my stomach spread.

  “Would you rather give oral or get oral?” he asked.

  “Give,” I answered right away. Jason’s hand was inches from mine. I could feel the heat emanating off him. The desire to kiss him was nearly overwhelming. I needed to tune this moment down a little or else I was going to jump him right here in my kitchen. “Would you rather have sex in front of your closest friends or have your sex tape posted online with your face blurred out?”

  “This is a good one. Let me think for a minute, I’m still lingering in the land of your last answer.” He rubbed his chin and a satisfied smirk came onto my face, because I’d stumped him. “Closest friends, I guess.”

  “Really? I figured you’d go for the other one.”

  He glanced at me. “I know I look good naked, but I’m not that conceited, geez.”

  “I didn’t mean it that way.” I shook my head and grinned.

  “So…would you rather have amazing oral or have great sex for an entire weekend?” he asked.

  He grabbed onto my hand and pulled it to his lips before kissing my knuckles. The touch of his lips against my skin was swoon-worthy. My teeth sank into my bottom lip. Jason’s eyes met with mine and my stomach clinched at the sight of their smoldering depths.

  “What’s your answer?” he asked.

  Something in his eyes, in his tone, let me know that my answer determined where the night went. This was the final question of the night; it was written all over his face.

  “Great sex for an entire weekend,” I whispered.

  CHAPTER THIRTY-EIGHT

  JASON

  She’d given the exact answer I’d been hoping for when I’d asked. I didn’t want to ruin the mood that had just been set by saying something corny like then let’s start that weekend right now, but I’m not going to lie—that was the first line that came into my mind. Instead, I went with something a little more subtle.

  “I would have given the same answer,” I said. My voice was low and tight from the intense chemistry floating between us. Playing Would You Rather had been the best idea I’d had in a long time. It definitely set the mood and released all the awkward tension from both of us.

  I brushed my lips against the tops of her knuckles in the form of soft kisses and heard Blaire’s breath catch. Flipping her hand over, I kissed her palm and then moved to press my lips to the delicate skin along the inside of her wrist. Closing my eyes, I kissed her there and nearly lost it when I heard a soft moan float from her lips to my ears.

  Blaire brought her other hand up and rubbed along the back of my head, trailing her fingers down my neck. I continued my way up her arm with soft kisses until I reached the thick strap of her tank top. Skipping over it, I planted my next kiss near her collarbone and heard her shudder. Slipping off the countertop, without removing my lips from her, I placed myself between her legs and moved my kisses up her throat. Her head fell back, allowing me better access. Resting my hands along the tops of her thighs, I eased my lips along her jawline.

  Blaire’s fingertips dug into my shoulders a bit and I paused with my lips mere inches away from hers. Her eyes were closed. She was waiting for the contact with an eager look of desire flitting across her features. With my eyes still open, I pressed my lips to hers in a feather-soft touch. Her arms wrapped around me and pulled me closer. Closing my eyes, I gave in to the yearning to intensify the kiss and she responded by opening her mouth further. The taste of strawberries and chocolate met with my tongue and I ran my hands up underneath the edge of her tank top and along her stomach.

  I wanted her so bad I hurt.

  Her hands fisted the back of my shirt and she pulled up. Releasing her for just long enough to slip my shirt over my head and toss it to the floor like she wanted, I realized on the kitchen counter was not where I wanted to do this with her. Cupping her face between my hands, I kissed her and then made my way to her earlobe.

  “Can we take this to your room?” I whispered, knowing my breath was hot and husky against her ear. She nodded, but didn’t speak. I pulled her earlobe into my mouth and scraped my teeth along it gently. “Let’s go, then.”

  Interlocking her fingers with mine, she pulled me along through the hallway and into her room. She flicked the light on and winked at me, her eyes hooded with lust. “You said you liked to do it with the lights on, right?” She cocked an eyebrow at me and her lips twisted into a wicked grin.

  Damn, she was gorgeous. This woman was going to be the end of me.

  I grabbed her hips and crushed my lips to hers. “Definitely.”

  Walking slowly with our lips locked together, we made our way to her bed. Crawling backward across the mattress, Blaire’s fingers found their way to the button on my shorts and began undoing it. Maybe I hadn’t been the only one with built-up sexual tension flooding my veins. She seemed to be suffering from the same.

  Slipping her thumbs through my belt loops, she tugged at my shorts, but didn’t pull them off. I smirked as I continued to kiss her. I knew this move well, it was the one women used to let you know they wanted you to stop and pull off your own damn clothes. Pressing my weight down on her a slight bit more, I did no such thing and slowed down my kisses. I was in no rush. In fact, I planned on taking my sweet time with her tonight.

  Shifting all of my weight onto one arm, I slipped my hand beneath her tank top and stroked along her stomach. Her fingers trailed against the bare skin of my back and her knees spread open to accommodate for my body tucked between them. This pushed us closer together and caused my shorts and boxers to constrict me even more.

  “Can I take this off?” I asked. I tugged at the hem of her tank top and kept my voice low.

  “Yes,” she whispered. It was breathy and sexy as hell.

  I pulled my weight off her as she lifted up and waited for me to do what I’d asked. Tossing the shirt to the side, I swept my eyes along the newly revealed portions of her. She wore a pink lacy bra that seemed to squeeze her voluptuous breasts tightly. Either those beautiful things had grown since I’d last seen them, or else that bra was doing wonderful things and she’d gotten her money’s worth.

  As she lowered herself back down, I slipped my hands up her sides, over her ribs, and around her back to unclasp her lacy bra. With one gentle tug it was undone and her breasts spilled free. Pulling the straps down her arms with my hands while I kissed her softly, I tossed the thing to the side and glanced down at her. She was stunning, staring up at me, those bright eyes wide and eagerly waiting for what I would do next.

  Shifting my body into a position I could move around in, I skimmed my lips down the length of her throat. I paused once I reached her collarbone and let my tongue lightly trail down from there to between her breasts. A moan escaped her and her hips
came up to press against me. The hint of a smile twisted across my face as satisfaction pulsed through me.

  I was going to make love to Blaire Hayes, the way I should have the night our baby was conceived, and she was going to enjoy every second of it.

  Running the pads of my fingers across the delicate, sweet-smelling skin of hers, I savored the sounds she made. I could tell she was struggling to hold them all in, to control how much she revealed to me about the way I was making her feel. This turned me on. I wanted to force her to let loose, to get so involved in how I was touching her and what I was making her feel that she forgot about the noises she made or the expressions that flitted across her face after each one.

  I wanted Blaire to get lost in me.

  Trailing my tongue along the length of her stomach, my hands came up to cup the minute baby bump she had forming. Placing a soft kiss there, I flicked my eyes up to meet with hers.

  “Hold tight, little peanut,” I whispered against her skin.

  Gripping the waistband of her yoga pants and the panties beneath, I tugged them both down in a few motions. She kicked them off and then reached for my shorts again.

  “If I have to be fully naked with the lights on right now, then so do you,” she said.

  Pulling my shorts and boxers off, I wadded them up and tossed them to the floor. Her arms wrapped around me and her fingers splayed across my back as she pressed me closer to her.

  “Better?” I asked.

  “Much.”

  My lips met with hers again and I intertwined my fingers through her hair as I cupped the sides of her face. Pushing her back down onto the mattress, I hovered above her and slowed our kisses to featherlight brushes once more. Brushing the hair away from her face, I stared at her for a moment. “Are you all right with this?” I needed to be sure.

  Blaire nodded and smiled. “Yes.”

  “Okay.” I grinned back at her.

  My lips grazed hers and I felt her thighs tremble against me. The only sound I could hear was the roaring of my heart as I attempted to keep the momentum slow and sensual between us. It took everything I had. I wanted nothing more than to go at it like rabbits, but I also wanted this moment to mean something. This is what the first time should have been like, but wasn’t, and now I was going to make up for that.