Doubting Thomas

by Adam Grinter

  My eyes were firmly fixed on the small screen in my hand and I kept refreshing the view count while staying well clear of the anger and attitude underneath. I flicked through the news websites waiting for the other shoe to drop.

  I didn’t have to wait long. The view count had hit critical mass and predictably it was the Mail Online that picked it up first. They had also got the footage of the priests speaking English. They had linked the two together already and were drawing a conclusion that was inevitable, but didn’t help us.

  ‘Miracle’ shooting survivor linked to religious prophecies

  The headline dominated the page. Big, bold letters at the top of the page almost demanding to be clicked and read. I knew how these things worked; click-bait. They wanted to attract as many eyes to their page so they could justify monetising the page, it was how advertising worked. The headline ticked nearly all the boxes the Mail liked. Miracles, violence, survival, religion and prophecy, if they could have found a way to add a bit of sex then I’m sure an editor would have exploded with excitement.

  Tentatively I clicked the link hoping it was some other shooting survivor, knowing, of course it wasn’t.

  CCTV footage of an attempted armed robbery has gained over ten million views since it was posted by an unknown source in the early hours of Thursday morning.

  The footage shows an innocent bystander getting shot at point blank range and escaping unhurt. The cabinet directly behind him explodes with the full force of the bullet that should have killed him.

  Meanwhile the religious website, www.catholiclife.com has posted footage of numerous priests being overcome with the Holy Spirit and talking in English when they have previously had no understanding of the language. Their proclamations all relate to something or someone coming and the world should ready itself.

  I clicked on the link in the article. The page it opened was full of thumbnail images of priests paused in mid-sentence. Each one could be played and viewed if required. I didn’t need to see them to know they were a repetition of the footage I had seen four hours earlier. I clicked back to the original article.

  Due to the coincidental timing of both bits of footage people are concluding that the message that the priests are talking about is manifest in the man in the robbery.

  Manchester CID who are investigating the incident released a statement, ‘We are aware of the identity of the witness to what could have been a tragic armed robbery but cannot comment about an ongoing investigation.’

  The Catholic church in the UK, through William Webster, Archbishop of London, released a statement about the priests. ‘We have been in close contact with our brothers and sisters in Christ around the world and can confirm that all footage on catholiclife.com is genuine and has not been manipulated in any way. All the priests involved are in good spirits and are as surprised as the rest of the world at their possession and speaking in tongues. None of them has felt any ill effects, rather they feel joyous at their close connection to God and the Holy Spirit.’

  When asked by themailonline.com to comment on the robbery footage the Archbishop would only say ‘we are aware of the footage and will be releasing a statement regarding the young man within it on our website very shortly.’

  themailonline.com can only speculate on the identity of the miracle-man. We will continue to monitor and update over the coming hours and days.

  I read the article for a second time and digested the words carefully. Both the police and the church had confirmed they knew who the person in the video was. That meant speculation would grow. John’s name would eventually leak.

  It always did.

  I passed my phone to Maria but she shook her head and showed me she had the same article up on her device. A look passed between us; the other shoe was dropping.

  John looked blankly on at the TV screen seemingly oblivious to the room around him.

  The screen on my phone changed automatically to display an incoming call. I knew who it was before I looked at the caller ID, I braced myself for the conversation I was about to have.

  I pressed the green phone icon to accept the call, raised it to my ear and said as breezily as I could muster.

  “Hi William.”

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  “Thomas.” William’s voice filled my head. My concentration on the device in my hand had transferred from my visual to my auditory senses. One small machine, so many ways to dominate my life. “The signs are obvious when taken together. We must present John to the world.”

  My heart sunk. John’s life was over. He would never be able to go back to normality.

  “We must do it now while the footage is current, while we are the focus of the media’s glare. Strike while the iron’s hot.” He said the last sentence with a laugh as if it was a joke. The anger at his plan rose in me but technically William was my boss, I had to try to keep my emotions in check. My role was to make sure criteria were met. Unfortunately for me and especially for John I couldn’t explain away the events unfolding around us. I tried a different tack and appealed to William’s humanity.

  “Do you think John’s up to that level of scrutiny?”

  William paused and seemed to give the question some thought, which I was grateful for.

  “God wouldn’t put this tribulation before us if he didn’t know we could cope.” It sounded logical from his perspective. My job was to give the opposite view.

  “John’s life will be over as he knows it. The pressure on him would be immense. The calls for miracles on demand, the pull from the media and the public would be too much for him to cope with.” I was almost literally begging for John’s life.

  “The Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away. Job 1:21.” William responded. His mind was set. This was God’s plan, this was an opportunity to exploit, this was right.

  I wished I had his faith, everything would be alright, God would be enough.

  For the first time in my life I yearned for the blissful certainty of belief.

  I looked across at Maria for inspiration. I hoped two heads would be better than one. She might have an argument that would counter William’s. She looked back at me and shrugged. We were done, we weren’t going to be able to save John from his inevitable fate.

  I’d travelled half-way round the world. I’d tracked down one man in seven billion. I’d presented him to my bosses. I’d fulfilled the mission laid out for me.

  I’d never felt such a failure.

  My shoulders slumped as I resigned myself to John’s fate. I knew I was going to have to prepare him for his ordeal but knew I would struggle with the words needed to reassure him. I hoped Maria would continue to calm him just by her presence in his life.

  “We having a special service on Sunday at the Cathedral so he can meet the public and speak to them.” William continued as if my objection had never been voiced.

  “I assume you’re going to invite the press?” I asked dejectedly.

  “Of course. We want maximum coverage of this.” William answered. “It could be a once in a lifetime event. It could be the moment Catholics have been waiting for. It could be the start of a new era of enlightenment.” Definitely not the word I would have used but he was on a roll and I’d lost the argument. I let it slide, I allowed him his moment of jubilation. “It could be my greatest achievement as leader of the Catholic Church in England.”

  I caught the comment about it being ‘his’ greatest achievement but again I let it go. Hoping he was just getting slightly carried away.

  “What time are you making the announcement?” I said as he paused, hoping to distract him and point him in another direction.

  “Seven tonight, on the website and in a press release.” William answered successfully distracted.

  “OK.” I said looking at my watch. We had an hour and a half and John’s life would change forever.

  Chapter Twenty-Six

  My call with William concluded and I looked at Maria. All she could muster was a smile of moral support. I was loo
king for divine intervention but God seemed to be on William’s side at that moment.

  I decided to procrastinate so I did what I always do, I put the kettle on. It was a moment of normalcy before the lunacy to come.

  I carried the three steaming mugs into the living room and gestured to Maria to move slightly closer to John. She took the hint and sat next to him on the sofa, legs touching. She reached over and held his hand again. John had been engrossed in the TV, or so we thought.

  “Is this about me talking on Sunday?” He asked. There was no fear or excitement in his tone it was more a statement of fact than question.

  “Yes.” I replied matching his monotone. “William wants to present you to the world at the Cathedral on Sunday.”

  John showed no emotion as he digested my explanation for a moment.

  “I’d like that.” He replied again still keeping the emotion out of his voice. His face remained blank, impossible to read.

  The conversation wasn’t progressing as I had envisaged. I’d thought there would’ve been fear and reluctance, but instead I had acceptance.

  “Really?” I let my incredulity out in a word.

  Again, John gave the question some thought.

  “Yes. It would be wonderful to be able to help all those people.” A simple answer to a complex problem. The consequences of this action had not yet occurred to John.

  “Do you really think you’ll be able to help everyone?” Maria questioned quietly.

  “Oh yes.” John was eager now. “Mother told me that I could.”

  “Mother?” Both Maria and I asked the same one word question at the same time.

  “Yes, Mother.” John stated as if it was obvious.

  I looked at Maria quizzically.

  “Who is Mother?” She asked, adopting the gentle tone again.

  “My Mother.” Again, very self-explanatory. John’s features implored us to understand the simple concept he was describing.

  “Your Mother died in childbirth.” Maria said.

  “I know that.” He was almost childlike in his responses. There was a disbelief on his part that he had to explain this to us. “But she talks to me. In my head.”

  “OK.” Maria said calmly. “What does she say?”

  “She tells me to help people. She tells me when I’ve done well. She tells me She loves me.”

  The thought he was hearing voices; a voice, scared me. Was he mentally unwell? Was he schizophrenic? Were there more problems we hadn’t identified yet.

  However, if it was just words of encouragement, the prods to help; that was just a conscience, wasn’t it?

  “Does she tell you anything else?” Maria probed.

  “She told me you were coming, your names and that I could trust you.” John answered matter of factly.

  “So, she tell you our names?” Maria clarified trying to keep the scepticism out of her voice.

  “Yeah.” A simple statement with massive consequences. Although what those were at this moment I couldn’t quite tell.

  “Who else knows about ‘Mother’?” The word felt strange in my mouth.

  John looked at me and thought hard about the question. His answer came slowly as if he was dredging up long forgotten memories.

  “My foster family knew.” He paused and I could see the pain this memory caused him. “They sent me back once they knew. Mother told me to keep Her a secret after that.”

  Mother was more perceptive than John. He didn’t see the ramifications of admitting he was hearing voices.

  “Does Mother tell anything else?” Maria asked. We were trying to temper our reactions to this revelation. This could be a game changer.

  “She helps me all the time.” John’s answer was enthusiastic. “She tells me what I need to know and who needs my help.”

  The naivety of the statement shocked me. On one level he was hearing voices which was a sign of mental problems, alternatively we were looking at an ESP type ability where he could foretell future events and names, or we would have William’s explanation; the voice of the divine. God is in personal contact with John.

  My understanding of the world would only accept one of those explanations and that didn’t help any of us. Maria looked at me, she wanted to speak privately.

  “OK John, give us a minute.” I said as I rose from my chair. Keeping my tone light not wanting to worry John or heighten my own sense of dread.

  I walked into the kitchen, Maria followed close behind, I slumped onto the same chair I had vacated earlier after my talk with Robert.

  “Fuck.” I exhaled quietly, aware my words might carry to the room next door.

  Maria took Robert’s chair and tried to placate both of us with, “I know, I know.”

  “What do we do with this?” I asked her.

  She looked at her watch. “Six-thirty you have twenty minutes to make decision.”

  “Fuck.” I said again. “We have to tell William.”

  “How that help?” Maria asked. It wasn’t an argument it was more of a challenge to find the positives from that decision.

  “It would help John.” I said it simply in the hope it would be the only reason I would need.

  “Help John or save you?” Maria was playing devil’s advocate. “John has accepted he will talk to world and is excited. William is locked to announce John’s arrival to world. What if we wrong about Mother? What if priests’ possession and talking in tongues are work of the Lord and this is all part of plan? What if stopping this is messing with God’s plan for future?”

  I looked at Maria stunned at her words. “Do you believe John is the...” My brain scrabbled for the right phrase. “Chosen one?”

  “No.” She answered but there was a resignation in her next words that betrayed the finality of her denial. “But what if we wrong?”

  I wanted to tell her why she was right there was no God, there was no divine voice. We were correct, they were wrong but the signs kept pointing us in the opposite direction.

  Time was against us, we couldn’t provide the evidence to counter their arguments in fifteen minutes. We had the same decision to make but for a completely different reason.

  “Do we tell William about ‘Mother’?” My resigned tone matched Maria’s.

  “No. It help no-one.” She answered. “Besides, you appeal to humanity before. Unsurprisingly for man of God he show he didn’t have any.”

  We both laughed a little too hard at a statement that wasn’t particularly funny. Instead it was rather worrying when you analysed it. Which neither of us really wanted to do at that moment.

  We both rose from the table and walked back into the living room. We resumed our places, Maria next to John on the couch and me in the chair. John looked at us as we entered the room, we smiled what we hoped would be reassurance towards him and he turned away to resume his blank stare at the flashing box in the corner of the room.

  Ten minutes.

  #

  We sat quietly for about half-an-hour. Neither Maria or I checked our phones, we knew what was coming so there was no point. I quietly ruminated on Maria’s questions and tried to find the counter argument. My logic had escaped me, I had to concede her point, ‘what if I’m wrong’.

  I took out my phone to distract myself from my possible existential crisis and asked, “Pizza?”

  Maria and John roused themselves from their torpors and enthusiastically agreed. I made the phone-call and we all waited eagerly for dinner to arrive. If only for a break in the monotony, a rousing from our stupors.

  As promised, forty-five minutes later the front door-bell rang. I got up and went to open it. I fished in my pockets for a tip for the middle-aged gentleman who handed me two boxes of pizza and numerous bags full of nibbly side dishes. I retrieved a note from a back pocket and thrust it at him with a “Thanks, mate.” The look on his face told me he recognised me but couldn’t quite place where he’d seen me before. I knew, so shut the door quickly before full recognition dawned on him.

  I carr
ied the piping hot meal through to John and Maria and scurried into the kitchen to fetch plates. When I returned neither of my guests had waited for the signs of civility and were gustily tucking into the feast laid out before them. I put the plates on the floor beside the low table full of food and greedily took a slice of pizza. I hadn’t realised how hungry I was until the tomato, cheese and doughy base entered my mouth. Like my companions I ate heartily until the boxes were empty except for smears of sauces and stripped chicken bones.

  Silence had returned with none of us quite sure what to say to break the mood around us. Our stomachs were full. We sat contentedly allowing the moments to pass without having to think of the tribulations to come.

  Chapter Twenty-Seven

  We woke the following morning at around nine AM. We all pottered around the kitchen fetching breakfast for ourselves. Saturdays were a lazy day for me normally. The extra people had ramped up the energy disproportionately. I wasn’t used to the bustle in my own house, this early in the morning.

  I sat in my now customary chair while John and Maria shared the sofa. I sipped my freshly made cup of coffee and felt brave enough to surf the web for last night’s announcement and news.

  Catholic Church will herald Dawn of New Age in address to the world

  Following on from the numerous pieces of footage released this morning the Catholic Church has released a full statement regarding the mystery man who survived a gunshot and the numerous priests around the world who have been speaking English.

  ‘The man in the robbery footage miraculously surviving unhurt after being shot at point blank range was on his way to London to meet the senior Catholic clergy when the incident happened.

  Simultaneously men of God around the world announced that the Lord’s message needed to be heard. We know that what this man has to say cannot be silenced.