Jaded [The Moonlight Breed 9] (Siren Publishing Everlasting Classic ManLove)

by Gabrielle Evans

  Gods, but he was gorgeous, so perfect that it was almost painful to stand in his presence. With shaggy blond hair that floated around his face like a halo, and creamy skin that practically glowed in the moonlight, he looked every bit the angel Spiro knew him to be. There was a wariness in his gaze, though, and his clear blue eyes clouded with unease as he shifted nervously and fumbled his fingers together.

  “Hello, Spiro.”

  “Don’t let him run, Doc. He needs you more than you know.”

  Jacobi’s words played through his mind on a never-ending loop. It was sound advice, and Spiro fancied himself a smart man. Playing it safe required very little from him, but it also garnered no rewards.

  In that moment, he had two choices. He could say nothing, nod his head, and simply leave, protecting himself from rejection. The other option was to take a chance, trust in Jacobi, and possibly gain something many only dreamed of having.

  Lifting his gaze to those bright blue eyes, the answer suddenly seemed very clear, and he didn’t know why he’d ever tried fighting it in the first place.

  “Hello, Zuriel.”

  * * * *

  His skin felt too tight and tingled with electrical currents like a thousand tiny ants crawling across his body. It was impossible to stand so close to Spiro and not feel intimidated. The guy exuded a level of power and sophistication that Zuriel could never hope to imitate.

  Flirting with the other men that roamed the grounds of Haven was easy. He wanted nothing more from them than attention, and they expected nothing from him in return. It was unclear exactly what the resident shrink wanted from him, but Zuriel doubted he’d be able to provide it.

  “So…” He clapped his hands together in front of him as he rocked back on his heels. He had no idea what to say next, and he was going to freaking kill Jacobi for putting him in this position.

  “How are you?” Spiro asked with genuine concern in his dazzling green eyes. “Were you hurt?”

  “No.” He’s been scared out of his mind when those goblins had come crashing into the house, but neither of them had touched him. “I’m not hurt.”

  Watching Spiro lean back against the railing of the porch, Zuriel was momentarily stunned speechless, rendered immobile by the mere sight of the man before him. Pale beams from the moon illuminated his ivory skin, casting the angles of his cheeks and jawline into shadows.

  Silvery-blond strands cascaded over Spiro’s broad shoulders, ending just below his pectorals, and Zuriel wondered silently if the locks were as silky as they looked. His body ached, his chest felt too tight, and some buried instinct inside him screamed for him to cross the short distance and rub against Spiro until he was drenched in Zuriel’s scent.

  He did none of those things of course, didn’t even understand where the urge came from. A voice in his head chanted, growing more agitated the longer Zuriel ignored it. “Mine, mine, mine.” That was ridiculous, though. Spiro didn’t belong to him, and he never would.

  Normally, he tried like hell to keep out of other people’s heads. It was a never-ending battle, and oftentimes he cursed his gift. It would be so easy to slip into Spiro’s mind and ferret out his secrets, but Zuriel wasn’t sure that he really wanted to know.

  When they’d first met, he’d been overwhelmed by Spiro’s thoughts. Never had he heard someone think so loudly. There had been something about a “chosen,” and while he didn’t know what that meant, it sounded rather ominous to him. So when Spiro had attempted to strike up a conversation, Zuriel had flipped his hair, batted his lashes, and informed the good doctor that he was not his type.

  Then he’d run like hell.

  “I think I understand now.” Pushing away from the railing, Spiro took a step closer, tilting his head to the side when Zuriel retreated. “You don’t know, do you?”

  “Don’t know what?”

  “Who you are. Who I am.”

  “You’re not making any sense.” Gods, he was no good at this stuff, and Spiro’s cryptic statement was beginning to make his head hurt. “I know who you are.”

  “Your heart is beating so fast, pounding so hard,” Spiro whispered. “Tell me something. Is it driving you insane that I don’t carry your scent right now?”

  “How? I…don’t…” He took another step back when Spiro came closer.

  “You feel like you’re about to crawl out of your skin. Am I right? There might be a bit of tightness in your chest and stomach. Do your gums itch? Do they ache around your canines, Zuriel?”

  Running his tongue over his teeth, Zuriel frowned. His gums didn’t hurt really, but there was an uncomfortable sensation around his canines, just as Spiro described. It was almost like when he shifted, but not quite. “How do you know this?”

  Spiro came even closer, and Zuriel tried to retreat again, but he’d backed himself into the corner, trapped by the side of the house and the wood railing. “I’m not going to hurt you,” Spiro vowed, but he didn’t stop his forward progress until he was mere inches away. “I want to help you.”

  Zuriel didn’t think the guy was doing it on purpose, but the deep, smooth cadence of his voice held a sensual quality that sent a shiver from Zuriel’s nape, clear down to his calves. His dick swelled instantly, straining against his zipper and embarrassing him.

  “Easy,” Spiro whispered. “Take a deep breath, Zuriel. Everything is going to be fine.”

  Unthinking of his actions, Zuriel did as instructed, sucking in a huge breath through his nose. The scent that hit him nearly dropped him to his knees, and he moaned loudly when his dick jerked in interest. “What is that?” he panted. He’d never smelled anything like it, and he wanted to fucking bathe in that scent.

  “It’s me,” Spiro answered, shuffling just a little closer. “Well, it’s what my scent is to you.”

  Zuriel opened his mouth to argue, but a startled gasp was all that escaped when his canines punched through his gums. Slapping a hand over his lips, he stared up at Spiro and shook his head frantically.

  “I’m sorry. I don’t know what happened.” Maybe he didn’t know much about life outside of The Hive, but common sense told him it wasn’t good manners to bare his fangs at someone during civilized conversation.

  “It’s okay. It’s natural.” Tilting his head back, Spiro opened his mouth to reveal his own lengthened canines. “See?”

  Giving up on figuring out what was happening on his own, Zuriel finally admitted defeat and turned to Spiro for answers. “I don’t understand. Can you just tell me straight? Please?”

  “Can I try one thing first?”

  “O–okay.”

  Spiro’s hand slipped under the hem of Zuriel’s shirt and around his hip to press against the small of his back. His palm was surprisingly warm considering the chilly temperatures outside, but Zuriel still trembled from the touch.

  Very carefully, very slowly, Spiro pulled him forward, holding him gently while their bodies molded together from chest to groin. “Is this better?” he asked. “Do you feel less like you’re about to fall apart?”

  His pulse had quieted to a more reasonable pace, his skin no longer crawled, and even breathing was becoming easier. “Yes, it’s much better. What does it mean?”

  Leaning closer, he skimmed his nose across Spiro’s collarbone where it peeked out from his shirt. That tantalizing scent was so much stronger up close, a mixture of warm peaches, honey, and fresh cream. Suddenly, he couldn’t get close enough. Gripping the man’s shoulders, he pressed more insistently against Spiro’s chest, soaking up his intoxicating warmth.

  Spiro didn’t stop him, either. His arm tightened around Zuriel’s midsection, cradling the back of his head with his other hand. He held him so close, and Zuriel could feel the answering bulge in Spiro’s jeans pressing against his own, but the contact didn’t feel sexual. Spiro held him protectively, almost reverently, as though he was precious and priceless.

  “It means I am yours, and you are mine,” Spiro finally answered, resting his cheek on top of Zuriel’s
head. “You are my chosen—my sienota—my mate.”

  “Yes,” the chanting voice in his head breathed with satisfaction, and Zuriel realized it was his fox who’d been fighting him this whole time.

  Unfortunately, Zuriel wasn’t so convinced. Sure, he believed that Spiro was his mate. The doctor had no reason to lie to him about that. However, he seriously doubted his ability to fulfill that role. Once Spiro learned of all the things he’d done, all the things that had been done to him in that lab, he’d regret this conversation for the rest of his life.

  It was probably best to get it all out in the open right away. Then Spiro could leave, and Zuriel could go back to pretending to be the coven’s happy little slut. It hurt. Fuck, it hurt like hell. It would hurt a lot more to see the disgust in Spiro’s eyes when he wasn’t expecting it, though.

  Easing away, he adopted a cocky grin and popped one hip out to the side. “Look, big guy. I can fuck you in a hundred different ways, and then fuck you again in another hundred ways you didn’t even know existed.”

  “Zuriel…”

  He couldn’t be distracted, though. This was for the best, so he kept talking as though there had been no interruption. “I can be your every fantasy come to life, and I’ll do it with a smile on my face. I can be your booty call and your dirty little secret. We can screw like our lives depend on it, and then you can ignore me when we pass on the street.”

  “Zuriel, stop it.”

  He couldn’t, though. He was almost finished. There was just one more thing left to say. “I can be your naughty assistant, your playful nurse, your slave, or anything else you can imagine.” Ducking around his mate, he sauntered toward the front door and knocked on it to request entrance. The smile never slipped, but inside, a little piece of him was crying in agony.

  The door opened, and his twin stood there with a disapproving glare. “I’m not letting you in until you settle this.”

  “Okay,” he replied easily. Glancing over his shoulder, he brightened his smile a notch and wiggled his fingers. “I can be anything you can dream up, handsome.” He pressed his fingertips to his lips and blew Spiro a sultry kiss. “Anything,” he repeated, “except your mate.”

  He tried to push past Zavion, but his brother continued to block his escape route. “You don’t have to do this, Zuri. You don’t have to be so scared all the time.” Zavion’s words flitted into his head as clearly as though he’d spoken aloud, accompanied by scenes of him and his mate, Cian, smiling and laughing. “You can have that, too, if you give yourself a chance.”

  He was happy for his brother, but he wasn’t Zavion. Not only did he have to live forever with the consequences of what The Hive had done to him, but he’d created a reputation for himself within his home that he’d never be able to live down. Maybe if he’d met Spiro sooner it would be different, but he couldn’t change the past now.

  “It’s for the best,” he murmured, pushing past Zavion and disappearing to his bedroom. In a couple of days it would be like none of this had ever happened, and Spiro would forget all about him.

  Stripping down to his boxers, he crawled into bed, pulled the blankets up around his shoulders, and buried his face in his pillow as hot tears streamed down his cheeks. When he woke up in the morning, he’d be himself again, present his mask to the world, and no one would have to know the hurt he felt inside.

  For now, though, he could allow himself this one weakness while no one was watching.

  Chapter Three

  In the two weeks since their disastrous conversation on the front porch, Spiro had kept his distance, giving Zuriel the time and space he needed to work out his feelings. While he had a tremendous amount of patience when it came to his work, he’d never been the type to sit back and wait for what he wanted in his personal life.

  It might have been different if Zuriel had given him any indication that he was torn about his decision or hurting a fraction as much as Spiro. From the moment he’d walked into the cabin, however, there was no trace of the scared and vulnerable man who’d clung to him in the darkness.

  Watching him parading around the coven, shaking his ass and flirting with anyone and everyone, ate away at Spiro until he wanted to hit something. There was absolutely nothing he could do about it, though. Zuriel had clearly made his choice, and Spiro had no claim to him, no right to say anything against his behavior.

  “Hello, gorgeous,” Zuriel purred from across the table.

  Spiro snapped to attention, but his hope died a fiery death when he noticed his mate batting his lashes at Raven. The vampire Enforcer held his hands up and shook his head. “I’m here for the meeting, not to be pawed and groped by you.”

  “Aww, but it would be so much fun.”

  The tip of Zuriel’s tongue traced his plump lips, and Spiro nearly vomited right there in his lap. By sheer willpower, he maintained his composure, but rage, jealousy, and possessiveness simmered just below the surface.

  “Sorry, little man, but you’re not my type.”

  “Well, what is your type?” Standing from his chair, Zuriel fisted his hands on his hips and turned one way and then the other. “Taller?” As everyone watched, he grew several inches until he was nearly as tall as the vampire. “Maybe you like dark hair?” The blond locks grew longer and became inky black. “Do you like muscles? Brown eyes? Tanned skin?”

  By the time he was finished with his transformation, he looked nothing like himself. Worse were the snide, sideways looks he kept casting at Spiro as though taunting him to say something. What he didn’t realize, however, was that though there was a smirk on his lips and confidence in his stance, there was a whole world of hurt shining in his eyes.

  It was that sadness that finally spurred Spiro into speech. He’d given Zuriel his space, let him do it his way, but he saw his mistake now. He saw where he’d gone wrong, and he had a pretty good idea of how to fix it.

  “Enough.” Placing both hands on the tabletop, he pushed to his feet and leaned forward, adding a bit of a growl to his tone. “Enough, Zuriel.”

  “Don’t worry, Doc,” Zuriel teased as he reverted to his usual appearance. “There’s enough of me to go around.”

  A mischievous grin flittered over Jacobi’s lips, and he snickered openly. “Get ’im, Doc.”

  Snatching Zuriel around his upper arm, Spiro dragged him across the table before anyone could even blink, and threw him over one shoulder, smacking his upturned ass when he began to struggle. “You’re done here, Zuriel. Say good night.”

  “Oh, you know how I like it rough,” Zuriel purred. “Hit me harder, sexy.” He pushed up so that he could see around the room and wiggled his fingers. “Good night, everyone. Apparently, Mr. Doctor is going to teach me a lesson.”

  Yes, he was going to teach Zuriel a lesson, but not the kind he was expecting. The little brat could run his mouth all he wanted. In the end, it wouldn’t matter, because Spiro had him figured out now.

  Marching down the hallway, he stepped into Zuriel’s room, kicked the door closed behind him, and dropped his squirming passenger onto the mattress. After bouncing twice, Zuriel flipped around so that he was stretched out on his stomach, propped his chin up on one hand, and grinned wickedly. “Well, here we are. What do you plan to do with me now?”

  “You can quit with the act. We both know that I didn’t bring you here for sex.” That wasn’t to say sex was completely off the table, but neither of them would be removing a stitch of clothing until they talked about what bug had crawled up Zuriel’s ass.

  “Pity. I’m very good at it.” Using his index finger, Zuriel traced his bottom lip and wiggled his eyebrows suggestively. “Are you sure you wouldn’t like a demonstration?”

  “I’m going to make this very simple, Zuriel. There isn’t a single thing that I wouldn’t do for you, but you’re going to have to meet me halfway.” His cell phone vibrated in his jeans, but he wouldn’t be interrupted. Pulling the device from his pocket, he declined the call and set the phone aside on Zuriel’s dresse
r. His family was just going to have to wait.

  “I’ll meet you in any way you want, Doc.” Rolling to his back, Zuriel hung his head off the end of the bed and ran both hands down his slim torso. “C’mon. You know you want to.”

  “Is that really what you want? If it is, if that’s truly all you want, I’ll walk out that door right now, and I won’t bother you again.”

  This was why doctors didn’t treat people they cared about. It was too hard to remain detached and not let his personal feelings cloud his judgment. In his case, it was doubly hard because of the intense connection between mated pairs.

  “It doesn’t matter what I want.” It wasn’t what Spiro wanted to hear, but at least Zuriel had dropped the slutty camouflage he used to hide himself from the world. Pushing into a sitting position, he crossed his legs under him and folded his hands into his lap. “This is who I am. This is who I’m always going to be. I wish I could be more, but this is it.”

  “C’mon, Zuriel, is that really the best you have? That’s the weakest excuse I’ve ever heard, and believe me, I’ve heard them all.” Everyone had the ability to be more, to be happier. The only thing holding Zuriel back was Zuriel, and Spiro just had to figure out why.

  “Stop trying to analyze me. You can’t fix me. You can’t change what happened to me.” He finally looked up from the contemplation of his hands and pinned Spiro with an unblinking stare. “Let it go, Spiro. You say you’ve heard it all?” He chuckled darkly and shook his head. “Believe me, you really haven’t.”

  “Then tell me.” He had a general knowledge of what had happened to the captives in The Hive. They were all working through their pain in different ways, but Zuriel exhibited the most self-destructive behavior by far. “Talk to me, lirimaer.”

  “That’s beautiful,” Zuriel whispered.

  “It’s elvish.” He hadn’t even realized he’d spoken the endearment, but it was fitting. Zuriel was the loveliest creature he’d ever met.