New Year, New You

by Tarrah Anders

wake up call. I go in search of the box with my clothes in it and find what I'm looking for. I am lacing my running shoes together as I hear a car door slam next door. Closing my

  front door behind me, I stand on my porch and start

  stretching. My gaze travels next door to Mindy's house and I see a car that isn't usually there parked in the driveway.

  It's a jeep, with dirt kicked up at the bottom of the frame.

  The doors are off, but the soft top is on. Whoever owns this car, likes it dirty. I shake my head and with my final stretch, I take off. I run around the neighborhood, the park and through one of the business streets and back home. By the time I reach my porch again, the jeep is gone and I think that it was just a part of my imagination. Walking back into my house, I head straight for the shower.

  C H A P T E R

  Two

  A knock at my door after lunchtime startles me from

  the book that I'm reading. I place my Kindle down and open the door to find Mindy on the other side. I step aside to let her in and close the door behind her. She slowly looks

  around the space and finally turns to look at me.

  "We need to do something here, it's been a few

  months and we should probably go through some of this

  stuff.” She says as I look at her like she’s grown a second head. “You mentioned that you wanted to and so I’m here to help you start.” She smiles holding up a bottle of wine.

  I sigh heavily, my hip against the wall beside the

  kitchen. My eyes travel over the space as if I'm taking in everything in my surroundings and feel suffocated with the thought of going through everything, especially with

  someone else present to witness any breakdowns that I may

  have. I push the thought aside, as I know Mindy offering to help is coming from a good place.

  I stare at the floor, then at the bottle of wine and nod my head, mumbling, "Okay, sure." The wine will make this easier.

  Mindy began moving around me, and soon there

  were empty boxes surrounding the kitchen. I sat at the table, not knowing where to begin as she sits next to me.

  "We don't necessarily need to throw stuff away, we

  can donate, we can store, whatever you want." She says with her hand on my shoulder.

  "We have to start somewhere. Kitchen stuff stays,

  that shit is expensive. I guess the first place to start would be... their bedroom."

  By the end of the day, my parents’ bedroom was

  boxed up. There was a 'donate' area, and a 'storage' area. The storage area was a lot smaller than I would have anticipated and thankfully I could put these few boxes in the rafters of the garage for the time being. I went through their things with my mind blank, I tried to not allow any emotion to seep through, and it worked. It worked until Mindy had to leave the house to tend to her family, with a promise from me that I would stop by for dinner.

  I'm unsure how long I sat on the bathroom floor

  sobbing, but soon enough two strong arms were lifting me

  off the floor and carrying me to the couch. Who I assumed to be Dave turned out to be an incredibly gorgeous male

  specimen, a stranger – however Mindy was standing behind

  him with worry in her eyes wringing her hands together. The stranger had piercing green eyes, a chiseled jaw with day old stubble and soft pink lips. His eyes were staring into mine, searching. He looked behind him to Mindy said something

  and then moved away. He stood behind her, his corded arms

  crossed over his chest, his muscular chest, with his jaw clenched. At his wrists were intricate tattoos, but from where I sit, I can't see them clearly. Soon the muffled noises that I was hearing became clear and I was hearing actual words.

  "-so worried, you never came over." Mindy's hands were holding mine in worry.

  "What?" I manage to say.

  "You were supposed to come over a few hours ago,

  you weren't answering your phone, then the door. I was so

  worried, especially after today."

  As I look between the stranger and Mindy, she

  sensed my questioning as she looked behind her.

  "Oh that’s my brother, he's visiting for the next few months. Gabe this is Vanessa, Vanessa this is Gabe." She motions between the two of us. He nods while I offer a

  broken smile. Embarrassed that he saw me crouched on the

  floor with tears, and possibly sitting in a puddle of snot from who knows how long I was sitting there when they came

  over.

  Gabe pushes himself off the wall that he was leaning

  against, and disappears. He comes back a few moments later with a box of tissues and hands them to me. I reluctantly take them and wipe my eyes and cheeks. I peer up at him and he's moved from behind Mindy to sit on the sectional couch. He

  picks up the remote and turns on the television. Sure, just make yourself at home.

  "Sorry, Dave wasn't home and Gabe just got back. I

  didn't know what to expect. You normally respond. I'm

  sorry, if..." The motions to her brother. "This is too much."

  "No, it's okay. I just lost track of time, today became... a lot."

  "I'm so sorry honey. I shouldn't have pressured you

  to do anything. I just get so bummed seeing you stuck."

  "Thanks, but I'm okay. I mean I will be okay. Sorry

  you guys had to see me like this." I sniffle.

  "Wanna come next door and have some food? Or, I

  can bring you a plate? Whatever you want to do." Mindy, being the mother hen asks.

  "I'll come over, just give me a few to freshen up." I push to stand.

  Mindy clears her throat to try to get Gabe's attention

  and when she does, he shuts off the television and stands as well, he scratches his stomach, causing his shirt to rise and a peak at his toned abdomen and smiles as he catches me

  watching him.

  Mindy and Gabe leave my house with Mindy

  promising that she'll be back over if I'm not in her kitchen in thirty minutes. So I make my way back to the bathroom and

  start a shower.

  Once fresh and clean, I put my long blonde hair up

  in a messy bun and go next door. I let myself in their side kitchen door and find Stella sitting at the counter with Gabe.

  They're whispering, looking like their conspiring while

  Mindy has her back to them in the kitchen over the stove.

  Stella sees me first and flies off her stool and into

  my arms. I catch her and lift her up, kissing her on the cheek.

  With Gabe watching my every move, I smile at him while I

  move past him, set Stella back on her stool and walk further into the kitchen to stand beside Mindy.

  "Thanks for everything today, and tonight. I got lost in myself back there, forgot about the time." I explain.

  She puts her arms around my shoulder and leans her

  head on my shoulder.

  "You've become one of my closest friends. I care

  about you, Stella cares about you. You're practically family, and family is okay with you losing yourself."

  I will not start crying again. I will not start crying again. I repeat to myself.

  I move out from under her arm and turn to Gabe and

  Stella.

  "So, Gabe. How long are you in town for?" I ask.

  "A few months, maybe longer, depending..." He

  shrugs picking up his beer bottle and then pressing it to his lips.

  "Depending on what he wants to do next with his

  life." Mindy offers from behind.

  "Where are you from?" I ask.

  "Same as Min, but I'm moving back to the states

  after living in France for a few years."

  "France, wow!"

  "Yeah, little brother here finished up college early and decided to move abroad before setting down roots and

/>   joining us hard working folk." Mindy jests.

  "Uncle Gabe is a real lumberjack, like Paul

  Bunyan!" Stella shouts.

  "Lumberjack?" I ask, quirking my eyebrow.

  "In high school and some of college, I worked at a

  lumber yard." He smiles while looking at his niece while ruffling her hair.

  He adores her and she him, which is evident as they

  look at another. Strangely though, I've never heard mention of Mindy's brother and haven't seen any photos of him on

  their photo wall. I make a mental note to bring that up the next time she and I are alone together.

  I take the moment to observe him further as he and

  Stella are again conspiring with another. He has chestnut

  brown hair, cut short on the sides, and longer on top. He's built, like a lumberjack I suppose and when he smiles, he has dimples. I love dimples. He catches me staring at him, and I see those dimples briefly before I quickly turn away. Hiding my face in embarrassment from blatantly gawking at him.

  Mindy motions for me to take the seat on the other

  side of Stella as she places a plate in front of me. Pushing it closer to me and mouthing eat up to me. Her motherly side is showing again. While I'm a grown woman, I do appreciate

  her caring and wanting to make sure I'm okay. I begin eating the meal, it's delicious and I have no clue as to what it is I'm eating other than it being a casserole of some kind. Stella and Gabe are still whispering and Stella keeps glancing in

  my direction. As I finish the last bite, I wipe my mouth and Stella cheers.

  "I win!" She exclaims startling me as Gabe gives her a high five and stands from his chair. He takes his empty

  beer into the kitchen and disposes of it in the recycling bin, then grabs another. He takes the first long pull from the

  bottle with his eyes on me. Then retreats from the kitchen with Stella following after him.

  "He's a man of few words, but we love him." Mindy says from across the counter.

  "Why aren't there any photos of him around the

  house?" I ask.

  "He hates taking photos. I think the last photo that I have of him was while he was in high school. And he

  forbade me to put it up, since it was during what he refers to as his Ugly Duckling years.

  "I didn't know he was going to be coming to town,

  or that you even had a brother." I glare at her.

  "There's not much to tell. He's moody and

  sometimes quiet, he's your age and up until a day ago lived in Paris, pretending to be a loner and yeah. He kinda just showed up, Dave and I didn't know he was actually coming,

  otherwise I would have told you. I hadn't talked to him in over a month and most of that conversation was mostly him

  and Stella talking. "

  "She loves him." I smile with my chin in my hand leaning on the counter.

  "She does. She's his little shadow. Since he's been

  back, she hasn't been very far from him. We went to Paris

  maybe a year ago, and that was the last time they saw each other. They Skype here and there, but sometimes it was hard to get a hold of him and him us." Mindy says rounding the counter and sitting at my side.

  "What was he doing in Paris?" I ask.

  "I have no clue."

  C H A P T E R

  Three

  I didn't see Gabe for a week after the night that I met

  him. He came and went from Mindy's house, waved at me

  when we saw another, he Jeep that I saw in their driveway

  the other day on my run ended up being his. Since Gabe was around, I babysat Stella only once during the week, while

  Gabe took her to do things all the other days. I ended up

  getting a phone call for a second interview and I feel like I aced it. Being told that I would hear back within a week, I was on pins and needles.

  I took some of the edge off by going through one of

  the other bedrooms, my brothers. This was the hardest.

  Being in the presence of Mindy with her sibling, made me

  long for mine. This was why I’ve mainly kept to myself this week. I boxed up everything from his bedroom and as I was

  packing my car up with the boxes, Gabe came out of the

  house. He stopped in his tracks as he saw me lugging a

  heavy box towards the trunk and then shook his head and

  headed my way. He grabbed the box out of my reluctant to

  let go hands.

  "Where do you want this?" He gruffly asks.

  "Wherever will fit." I say motioning to my car.

  "How many more do you have?" He asks as he places in strategically beside another in the trunk.

  "Um, a bunch, but you don't have to help. I've got

  this." I smile. "Thank you though for offering."

  “I was just going to go to the gym, I'd rather be

  useful to you than not. I don’t mind. Plus, you shouldn't have to cart all these out here when I'm perfectly capable of

  helping." He smiles, crossing his arms over his chest.

  I too cross my arms over my chest, unintentionally

  pressing my breasts up and creating some amazing cleavage.

  I notice his eyes glance down to below my face and then

  quickly up with a smirk.

  "I'm perfectly capable as well." I finally say.

  "I'm aware of that. I was raised to be a gentleman,

  let me at least help you." He asks matching my stance.

  I angle my head to my house and begin walking with

  him following me. I enter the bedroom and point at

  everything.

  "Everything is being donated."

  "Why don’t we just call for a pick up?" He asks.

  "This is a lot of stuff, the bed and dressers going too?"

  "No, just the boxes will do. I'll re-purpose

  everything out, make it seem new again."

  "Before we place anything more in a car, would you

  be okay with a pick-up? It would save you time and a

  hassle."

  He makes a good point, and something I didn't even think that donation centers did anymore.

  "Yeah, that might be a smart idea. I have some stuff

  from my parent’s room too, I figured it would take several trips, but that’s a better and smarter option. Thanks." I smile.

  "Why don't I load everything into the garage and

  then I can help you with a pickup?"

  "Yeah. And hey, thanks Gabe."

  "No problem." He says as he disappears with two

  boxes to the garage.

  Grabbing a box, I follow him and we continue in

  silence until the room is empty, I then motion him towards my parent’s room and we do the same there.

  Once finished, I grab a beer out of the fridge and

  hand it to him. He smiles as he takes it after washing his hands.

  "Mindy told me the abridged version of what

  happened. You wanna talk about it at all?" He approaches cautiously.

  "Not really, but thank you." I decline politely I say leaning against the counter sipping off of my own beer.

  "No worries. I know that sometimes talking to a

  stranger is easier than anything." He says with a haunted look, like he knows from experience.

  "I fear you are no longer a stranger Gabe. You've

  seen me cry, you've helped me move boxes, and I think

  we're in the friends’ zone."

  "Ouch, the friends’ zone, no guy wants to be there.”

  He jokes with a smile. “Well, the offer still stands. Mindy said you're like family, so yeah, mi famillia es tu famillia."

  He shrugs.

  We stand in silence for moments until my cell phone

  rings in my bag on the counter. I rifle through it and quickly answer. With anticipation, I hold my breath as I listen. I thank the cal
ler and then hang up.

  A smile erupts on my face and I suddenly start

  jumping up and down startling Gabe as he watches my every

  move. I throw myself at him, luckily his reflexes are fast and he grabs me as my arms wrap around his neck. I scream

  happily into his chest as his strong arms have enveloped me.

  After a moment, I pull back and immediately step out of his grasp. Right away missing the warmth the moment I stand a

  few feet away.

  "Good news?" He asks.

  "Great news! I got the job! I thought I would be

  jobless for like ever!" I squeal.

  "What kind of job?" He asks.

  "It's for a non-profit downtown that works with the

  homeless."

  "Well congrats! That’s great news. We should...

  celebrate. C'mon, get your shoes back on – let's go get some drinks." He offers.

  "Drinks?" I ask looking at the clock and then back at the beers in our hands already.

  "C'mon, my treat." He smiles as if he reads my inward battle with myself.

  I smile back and run to get my shoes. This has been quite the day!

  C H A P T E R

  Four

  Gabe drives like a crazy person! Well maybe not,

  I’m quite sure that overall crazy people, or those classified as such are sitting in a padded room more often than driving

  around. Although, I know from my professional career that’s not always politically correct. As I’m busy mentally

  contradicting myself, Gabe is driving like a bat out of hell as he takes us to a location that he says is good, however won’t divulge the information as to where. Most likely, so I won’t object.

  The speakers are blaring out the Suicide Squad

  soundtrack loudly, leaving it difficult to have a conversation.

  Not like I would want to right now, I fear that talking may distract him from taking a last minute turn or who knows

  what. My eyes go from being shut to peeking out of one eye and my body is being jerked left and right as I hold onto the roll bar of his jeep. I want to act like a spoiled brat and cross my arms and pout, but I would fear for my life if I did that.

  Finally after the ride of my life, Gabe pulls into a

  parking spot and the jeep comes to a stop. He shuts the car down and I can sense him turning to me.

  “Oh shit! I’m sorry. I’m not used to anyone driving with me.” He rushes.