by Erin Trejo
“I didn’t mean to scare you. This isn’t the best part of town,” he says.
“It’s okay. I get it. No harm done. I have your medicine and food. Let me just turn the light on and-”
“No,” he roars which startles me again. “Leave them off.”
Okay. Weird, but whatever.
“Uh, okay then. I will leave the food on the table for you. Here’s your medicine. You need to take this for your fever. I’ll be back in a few hours to check on you again. If that’s okay with you?”
I don’t want him to snap at me again. I walk closer and his face is still shrouded in the darkness of the room. He holds his hand out and I drop the pills in them before I pass him the water. I wait while he swallows them out of habit. You’d be surprised at the amount of people that will tongue or cheek it even though it’s only a fever reducer.
“I really didn’t mean to scare you,” he says once again.
“I’m fine. Get some rest and eat. It’ll help make you feel better. If you hear an alarm go off it’s just your IV machine. I’ll come change it when it’s time,” I remind him.
“No lights.”
“Yeah, sure. No lights. Goodnight, uh, whoever you are,” I tell him.
He chuckles and it’s the deepest chuckle I’ve ever heard. It makes my heart beat faster.
“Monster. You can call me Monster.”
Sure, because that’s not weird or anything.
“Umm, okay. Goodnight Monster.”
I walk out of the room and close the door behind me. It shouldn’t bother me that the man wants to leave the lights off, but as soon as the door is closed the light in the room filters through under the door. I wonder why he doesn’t want me to see him? I shrug my shoulders and go into the back room. I grab my bag of food and drop onto the twin sized bed Paul had brought in for me. I grab the remote control, flip on a comedy channel, and eat like I do every night.
Should it bother me that this is what my life has become? Some days I think that it should, while others I just don’t give enough of a damn to care. I’m safe and away from the things that haunt my dreams at night. That’s the most important thing to me.
Chapter 3
Monster
“How did it go last night?” Paul asks dropping into the chair next to the bed.
“Fine. Can I go now?” Paul sighs and pulls his glasses from his face. He looks over at me and replies, “Few more days. Was Kyza okay last night?”
“What do you mean? She came in and did what she needed then left. I don’t know shit about her man,” I tell him, but now he’s got me wanting to know more.
Yeah, I’m a nosey motherfucker. I watch Paul as he rubs his tired eyes. He obviously wears himself out doing this shit. He needs to retire and just say fuck it, but he won’t.
“She just seemed a little off today. She seemed a little more jumpy than usual.”
“That might be my fault. I didn’t know it was her and I kinda pulled a gun on her.”
“You what?” he snaps as he slides his glasses back on and stands up to his feet.
“Hell, I didn’t know. This neighborhood is sketchy as hell man.”
He shakes his head and runs his hand through his grey hair before he looks back in my direction.
“Can you do me a favor?”
“Depends on what it is.”
“I like Kyza. Love her as if she was my own. She’s hiding from something though.”
“And you want me to find out what it is?” I ask none too thrilled about this idea.
“Talk to her. She doesn’t have any friends that I know of. Most days I think I’m all she really has. She showed up here when she was nineteen and she’s been here since then. Why wouldn’t a girl like her want to get out there and do something?” he asks, but it seems as though he’s talking more to himself.
“Maybe she’s a simple girl?” I offer.
“You’ve seen her. She’s far from simple. How many girls do you know that look like her and still stick around in this shit?”
He’s right, I did see her last night. She’s gorgeous. Her long blonde hair is worn in dreads, her skin is pale white and pops with the makeup she wears. She’s far from someone that should be staying around here.
“Looks aren’t everything Paul. I’m sure she has her reasons.”
“I agree with you, but I’d still like to know. Maybe she has a family out there somewhere?” he says on a sigh.
“I’ll talk to her, but I’m not promisin’ shit.”
“Thanks Monster, I’m heading out. She’s out the front cleaning.”
“See you tomorrow doc.”
I watch him leave the room. He looks as worn down as ever. It makes me wonder what his life is like outside of this place, or if he even has a life outside of here.
When I hear the door close I shove out of the bed, grab the IV pole, and drag it along with me. I slip my boots on and walk out of the room towards the hallway. I can hear music playing and I smirk when I recognize the rock music. That helps explain the dreads.
I round the corner and watch her for a second as she tosses some trash into the garbage can. I can’t help but let my eyes wander over her body. She’s fit. It looks like she works out. Fuck if I know.
“Jesus,” she screams when she spins around and sees me standing there.
Her eyes roam over me from head to toe. Surprisingly she doesn’t stop to linger on the scars on the right side of my face. I earned the name Monster when I was twelve. Not only was I bigger than most kids, but I sported burn scars over the right side of my face and neck thanks to a meth explosion in my mom’s kitchen. Everyone feared me after that. They always looked at me like I was a monster and the name just stuck. Not her though, she isn’t looking at me the way everyone else does. She’s looking at me the way a woman looks at a man.
“I didn’t mean to scare you,” I tell her while watching her breathing slowly return back to normal.
“It’s fine. I almost forgot I had a house guest,” she says while smiling at me. Her bright blue eyes shine lined with dark black makeup.
“You don’t look at me like the rest of them,” I mutter under my breath.
It’s bothering me. When a woman looks at me like I’m the scariest thing she’s ever seen I can handle it. I’m used to that. She’s just looking at me like I’m, well me.
“What do you mean? The rest of who?” She asks, her brows pull in as her eyes narrow and she looks into my eyes.
My eyes, not my face. I’m so used to the opposite that I don’t know how to handle her. I’m on edge just being here, but this makes it so much worse. This is why I wanted to stay in the dark where I belong.
“Paul’s worried about you,” ignoring her question I ask one of my own. Her features relax as she smiles back at me.
“He’s always worried,” she replies as she continues to clean. “What’s he worried about now? Am I spending too much time here again?”
My eyes follow her every movement as she lifts boxes and pushes things away.
“Yeah. He thinks you don’t have any friends or family,” I add. She sets the box on her hip before she turns to look at me.
“I don’t have any family or friends, I’m more of a loner. Friends are nothing but complications and drama. That’s just not who I am.”
If nothing else, this girl is honest. I like that. Hell, I like her.
“That seems about right. You grow up around here?”
She shakes her head and walks past me with the box still on her hip. I follow her down the hall when she moves into another room.
“I grew up in a lot of places. I don’t really call any one place home. What about you? You from around here?” she asks but she never looks over at me. Avoidance is always easier than the truth and she is currently avoiding the shit out of me.
“Nah. I moved down here from California.”
She turns to look at me with a slight smile.
“Really? Trading one hot climate for another?”
She seems genuinely interested.
“Somethin’ like that. Too many old ghosts back there,” I say as I point to my face.
She nods as if she understands before she leans back against the exam table and crosses her arms over her chest.
“What happened to you?”
“My mom was runnin’ a meth lab with her boyfriend. Shit blew up when they were both fucked up out of their minds. I was a little too close to the action,” I tell her as I remember that day like it was only yesterday. I can still remember the smell of my burning skin as I screamed and cried out for help.
“Christ that had to be scary for a kid.”
“It was. It was made even worse when my mom didn’t even wake up to find out what had happened. She died in that house.” Her eyes fall for a second before they come back up to meet mine.
“I’m sorry. Is that why you moved?”
“No. I lived in foster homes after that. The last one I lived in, well, let’s just say it ended kinda badly.”
She nods her head as if she can understand, but she can’t. There’s no fucking way anyone could understand what I had to endure while I was there. I still don’t fully understand it. The memories come flooding back like someone opened the goddamn flood gate. I sway on my feet and move to the wall so that I can stand against it and hold myself up. Kyza rushes toward me and wraps her hands around my arms.
“Are you okay? You don’t look so good. You need to sit down,” she says trying to usher me over to a chair.
After a second I let her. Once I sit I try to clear my head, but I can’t. I see him. It was him standing over my bed wearing a smirk like he’d won. There was blood. It was everywhere. Blood coated my skin and covered the pajamas I wore. There was so much fucking blood. I shake my head a few times, but I need to get out of here. I can’t handle this shit.
“I gotta go,” I say as I’m reaching for the IV.
“Don’t pull that out,” she gasps.
“I need to fuckin’ go.”
She nods her head and reaches for my arm. She raises a finger to me tell me to hold on a second before she moves across the room. She grabs a few bandages and bottles from a cabinet and comes back over to me. She sets the items in my lap and works to remove the IV from my arm, placing a band aid over the small wound. My heart is still pounding inside of my chest and I wouldn’t be surprised at all if she heard it. She looks up at me through those big blue eyes, and I have to stifle my instinct to cringe. His eyes were that same color of blue. This is messing with my head. Fuck!
“At least take these pills like the bottle instructs.” I’m about to open my mouth when she stops me, “Please.”
The begging I can see in her eyes is what makes me snap. I lift my hand to her cheek and nod. There’s something dark in this girl, something that doesn’t belong there.
“I’m sorry. Whatever happened to you, I’m sorry,” my voice almost a whisper as a single tear falls down her cheek.
I remove my hand, shove out of the chair, and storm from the room and down the hall. I don’t stop until I’m outside and I can catch my breath. I grab my cell to call Viking and tell him to get someone over here to pick my ass up.
Chapter 4
Kyza
Each day forward is one more day away from my past. That’s the best I can do for now. I’ve closed myself off from those days, but that man brought every single second of my old life rushing back in a matter of seconds. I hate him for being able to do that to me. No one has ever broken through that barrier, and I let a complete stranger do it. It pissed me off at first, but then I just became angrier. I tried not to take it out on Paul, but I found myself snapping at him far too many times. I hate myself for that too. I’m whining as we speak and that just pushes my even more.
“I don’t want to go,” I whine a little more.
“Too bad. If I’m going then you are too,” he grins at me.
“Why are you going anyway?” I ask, looking up at him as he continues to drive down the road.
“The club made a very generous donation to the clinic and asked me to come to the cookout.”
“The club? What kind of a club?”
“MC. Motorcycle Club. These boys aren’t exactly on the legal side of the law,” he explains.
“I think I got that much when the man with the infected gunshot wound was staying in the office. So why are we going again?” I tease him.
“We’re making an appearance. We don’t have to stay. It’ll be fun and Monster asked if you would come.”
“He what?” I’m surprised that he even remembered me really.
“He asked if you would be coming with me and I said I’d gladly bring you along.”
“Why would he care if I was there?”
Confusion. That’s what I feel. He doesn’t know me. I damn sure don’t plan on knowing him.
“How the hell should I know? I just do as I’m asked Kyza, just go with it. Who knows? You might have some fun. Maybe make some friends.”
“Is that what this is about? You think I don’t have any friends?” I ask as I cross my arms over my chest.
“Do you?” he asks glancing at me briefly before turning back to the road.
“Well no, but that’s not the point. I don’t like people,” I say trying to get the attention off me. I should have just kept my big mouth shut.
“Kyza you work with people every day. You seem just fine to me.”
“It’s all a front; I really don’t like people.”
Paul laughs before he turns and pulls up to a set of gates. It’s almost laughable that he claims this is an illegal club. It’s right in the heart of town.
“You’re joking?” I ask as I look over at him.
It isn’t until the gates open that I realize that this is in fact not a joke at all. Paul pulls in and I watch as the gates close behind us. I wonder if we’re prisoners now? This is not okay with me, not by any means.
“There are gates Paul,” I snap when he shifts the truck into park. He laughs and climbs out, moving to my side Paul opens my door and helps me out.
“It’s for protection Kyza. It’s fine,” he tries to reassure me.
“Yeah, because that makes me feel so much better,” I hiss and he just laughs even harder. “If you need a damn gate for protection then I don’t think we should be here.”
“They won’t let anything happen to you while you’re here,” he shrugs, wraps an arm around my shoulder, and starts leading me toward the massive building. A sick feeling dances in my stomach as I walk along. This is a bad idea. I can already feel it.
“This is crazy,” I mumble under my breath.
“No, this is payback for letting our patient leave early.”
My mouth falls open as I look up at him. His dark eyes crinkle in the corners as he smiles back at me. He’s no doubt trying to hold in his laughter.
“You saw that man. I couldn’t have stopped him even if I’d tried,” I snap.
“Well, you didn’t try very hard,” that deep voice says.
I turn my head and see Monster. He’s standing in the light of day right in front of us. His shaggy hair is hanging around his face, but he looks better than he did before.
“Are you kidding me?”
Monster just shakes his head and brings his beer to his lips as I watch. There is something sexy about the way he does it, and I know I shouldn’t be thinking about it, but damn. He swallows a lot and his throat is bobbing as I watch him dumbfounded.
“You could have tied me to the bed,” he suggests softly while moving closer to me.
My heart leaps into my throat as Paul laughs, slaps a hand on Monster’s shoulder and turns to walk away. What a traitor! I can’t believe he just left me with this… this… Monster.
“You might have gotten hard if I’d done that,” I respond while rolling my eyes.
Monster groans and steps closer to me. His body is pressing into mine. I can feel his hard on and it isn’t small.
“I
might have gotten one from just lookin’ at you in those jeans,” he murmurs as he wraps his arm around my waist and pulls me impossibly closer.
I look up into his dark eyes and my breathing picks up speed. He smells like mint, cigarettes, leather, and sexy.
“I’m here with Paul in case you forgot,” I tell him as I reach up to place my hands on his chest to push him back.
The only thing I get is a growl low in his throat. Jesus, this man is so hot and cold. At the clinic he didn’t even want the lights on, but now he’s ready to fuck me in the parking lot?
“You ain’t with Paul. You work with him. Big difference darlin’.”
“Well, I’m not looking for a quickie, so thanks anyway.” He chuckles and it vibrates through me. A shiver races down my spine as he releases me and nods.
“Fair enough. Come on, I’ll introduce you.”
He steps back and starts walking toward the building as I follow him. I look around at all the people milling about. Most of them are wearing the same cut that he is. I learned that word at the clinic when another biker came in. I don’t think he’s with this club though. The colors weren’t the same.
As soon as I step inside the building, music rattles my insides. There are people everywhere. They’re dancing, fucking and drinking. Fucking yep, they’re fucking right there on the pool table.
“Don’t mind them,” Monster leans in to tell me over the music.
Don’t mind them? They are fucking right here in front of god and everyone. I drag my gaze away and follow Monster through the room. More than once I’m bumped into and smirked at by guys. Some of them I wouldn’t mind, but others? No fucking thank you. A few of them look like serial killers that might hack me up while I’m asleep.
“This is Carnie. She’s Viking’s old lady,” Monster says. I smile and offer my hand to the girl holding her hand over her very pregnant belly.
“Nice to meet you.”
“I’m Kyza,” I tell her.
She looks up at Monster, raises her eyebrow, and then looks back to me.
