Condemned to Love: 

by Davis, Siobhan

  “I got it, boss. Get Sierra to safety.” I walk in front of Sierra down the steps, feeling her close to my back as we descend lower into the hidden space below. When my feet hit the bottom, I feel around for the light switch and turn it on, illuminating the space. They have had work done since I was last here. The space is cleaned out, and there is a couch, a table and chairs, and a small refrigerator and pantry. A side door leads to a toilet.

  “There’s no cell service,” Leo says, claiming a seat at the table while he frowns at his phone.

  “I didn’t expect there to be,” I say, flopping down on the couch as Alessandro appears.

  “This is pretty fucking cool.” Alessandro looks around with appreciation in his eyes.

  “So, what now?” Sierra asks, taking some waters from the refrigerator.

  “Now, we wait for help to show up.”

  46

  BEN

  “How do you know they will help us?” Sierra asks, handing me a water.

  “Terry was family, and I used to hang out with them here some nights. I expect at least some of the members will still remember me.”

  “Okay,” she quietly says, before adding, “I’m going to use the bathroom.”

  We are silent until she closes the door.

  “Will they know of your reputation now?” Leo asks in a low tone, raising one brow, and I get what he’s asking.

  “I assume so. But they’re friendlies. They have no reason to fear us or us them.”

  “Let’s hope they get to us before the Russians,” Alessandro says.

  “The Russians won’t find us down here. It’s a sweet setup,” Leo says.

  “They won’t find us,” I agree. “This is a well-guarded secret. The MC have hidden from the authorities and rival gangs several times over the years, and no one found out about it. Unless they saw us come in here, we’re safe.”

  “What is going on, Ben?” Alessandro asks, taking a seat at the table. “This whole situation reeks.”

  “I agree. Something is not adding up, and I won’t rest until I find out what.”

  * * *

  “I’m scared,” Sierra whispers a little while later as we sit patiently on the couch waiting for someone to rescue us. We had all held our breaths as footsteps explored the warehouse a short while ago, the creaking floorboards betraying enemy presence. But it’s been silent for the past fifteen minutes, and I’m pretty sure the Russians are gone. Like I said, they wouldn’t find us unless they knew to look down here. Sierra’s head is on my shoulder, and I have my arm wrapped around her, running my fingers up and down her arm. She’s like a brick in my embrace, tense and scared, even if she’s not outwardly showing it.

  “Don’t be. I’m not going to let anything happen to you.”

  “What about Rowan? What if something has happened to him?”

  “Firefly.” I tilt her face up. “Rowan is safe at home. Our property is well-protected, and my soldiers know to take him to the safe room if there is any threat. Natalia will make sure nothing happens to him.” I press a kiss into her hair. “Why don’t you try sleeping. We could be waiting a while.”

  “I can’t sleep. I’m too wound up.”

  “Try.” I say, pressing her head into my lap.

  She falls asleep five minutes later, and I stare at her, watching small puffs of air seep from her slightly parted lips as she sleeps. She is so beautiful it hurts to look at her sometimes. In sleep, she looks even younger, and I have a burning need to protect her from all the evils of this world. I know she has chosen a life with me. That she agreed to marry me of her own volition when she said yes to my proposal, but I still carry guilt for bringing her and my son into this life. I don’t want this for her, yet I’m far too selfish to ever let her go.

  “You look like a creeper,” Leo says, not lifting his head from the crossword puzzle he’s doing. He found a bunch of old newspapers, and he and Alessandro are keeping themselves occupied doing crossword puzzles.

  “You have that scary intense look on your face again,” Alessandro adds.

  “What scary intense look?” I whisper, not wanting to wake my Sleeping Beauty.

  “The one you wear when anyone looks funny at Sierra or says anything nasty to her.”

  “It’s your ‘I’m gonna rip out your insides and hang you by your entrails’ expression,” Leo adds, briefly lifting his head to smirk at me.

  “Assholes,” I murmur, flipping my finger up, as the floorboards creak overhead again. A flash of brief light filters down the stairs, alerting us to imminent company.

  Leo and Alessandro are instantly alert, whipping out their guns and moving to the bottom of the stairs.

  “Sierra,” I whisper in her ear, gently shaking her shoulders. “Wake up, baby.”

  I place my hand over her mouth when her eyes blink open, cautioning her to keep quiet.

  Heavy feet thud down the stairs as I stand, pulling Sierra with me, keeping her shielded behind me, and raise my weapon.

  A skinny man with long dark hair pulled back in a ponytail appears in front of us. His brow puckers as he drinks us in, rubbing his scraggly beard. I peer at him more closely, a grin spreading across my face as I recognize him. “Pillow?” I exclaim, stepping forward, taking Sierra with me but keeping her firmly behind my back.

  He startles, staring at me in confusion for a few seconds before a light goes off in his eyes.

  “Benny? Benny Carver?” He guffaws. “Or it’s Mazzone now, I hear.” He looks at our guns. “Don’t be pointing those weapons at me, boys.”

  I nod at the guys, and they put their guns down the same time I slide mine in the band of my black slacks. I pull Sierra to my side, taking her hand in mine. “It’s good to see you, old man, though I hardly recognized you.” I turn to my friends. “Pillow here used to carry a lot more meat, especially around his middle. The guys loved teasing him he was soft and cuddly like a pillow.”

  “Motherfucking assholes can’t call me that now,” Pillow says, reaching forward and clasping me in a hug. “It’s good to see you, Benny boy.” He claps me on the back. “Terry was very proud of all you’ve accomplished.”

  “I didn’t see you at the funeral,” I say.

  “I was out of the country at the time. Terrible business, that.” He shakes his head, sighing heavily.

  “I didn’t even know he was sick. I hadn’t kept in regular contact with him those past few years when I should have.”

  Confusion, mixed with concern, crosses his face. “Terry wasn’t sick, boy. I thought you knew that.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “Why don’t I tell you when we get in the van. I assume you need a lift someplace?”

  “The airport,” I say, quickly introducing the others.

  “Did you spot anyone lurking around outside?” I ask, as we climb the steps back into the warehouse.

  “If you mean those ugly Russian fuckers, we took care of that problem for you.” He tosses a grin over his shoulder. “The guys are cleaning up as we speak.”

  I don’t ask for specifics because I don’t trust Pillow not to give us the warts and all account, and Sierra doesn’t need to hear that. She’s been traumatized enough today, even if she appears to be holding it together fine.

  “I owe you,” I say, hauling myself into the back of the large white van behind Sierra. It’s parked right outside the warehouse, facing the other way, blocking the view from anyone who might be looking. Nightfall is creeping in, and it’s dusky out. Alessandro takes shotgun while Pillow slides behind the wheel. I keep my arm around Sierra on the hard wooden bench, sitting up close to the front seats so I can talk to Pillow as we drive toward the airport. Leo claims a seat on the bench across from us.

  “You’re family, Benny boy. You don’t owe us anything.”

  “All the same,” I say, handing him my business card. “If you or any of the MC ever need my help, you only have to ask.”

  “Appreciate it, man.” He tucks it into a pocket in his leather
cut.

  “Did you happen to hear anything about an SUV accident just outside town?” I ask, wondering what happened to my soldiers.

  “They were your guys?” Pillow eyeballs me through the mirror. I nod. “I heard two are dead and two have been taken to the hospital.”

  “Shit,” Leo mutters, already tapping away on his cell. “I’ll handle it,” he adds.

  “What was it you want to tell me about Terry?” I ask Pillow, holding Sierra close as we shuffle back and forth over bumpy terrain.

  “We’re among friends here, I assume,” he says, looking at me through the mirror.

  “Of course. You can speak freely.”

  “I expected you would know, but it’s obvious you don’t. Terry was a made man, Benny. He was a soldier for The Outfit and our main point of contact for years. We sell guns and drugs on their behalf.”

  That revelation almost knocks me over. I had no idea. Maybe if I had visited him after I left, after I became involved in this world, it would have been noticeable or he would have confided in me, but I had no clue. “I didn’t know. He never told me.”

  “He wasn’t sick, Benny. Someone wanted Terry taken out, and we believe it was The Outfit.”

  Shock races through me. “Why would they want to take out one of their own? What had he done?” I know the reasons why soldiers are killed, but Terry was one of the most loyal, most honorable men I know, and I can’t imagine him betraying the organization.

  “Something went down around the time you left. He wouldn’t tell us. Said it was safer we didn’t know, but he lived in fear. He was a hermit after you left Chicago. Staying in his house except when he had to work or do a job.”

  “That explains why he rarely answered my calls in those early days, and when I did get talking to him, he usually had little to say.” I press my palm to my brow, consumed with guilt. “I should have pushed him harder. Done more for him.” It was a shitty way to pay him back for everything he did for me.

  “He knew you cared for him, Benny. He knew it was you who paid the mortgage on his house. Did you know he left it to you?”

  I shake my head. I didn’t know that.

  “Someone burned it to the ground a few days after his funeral.”

  I didn’t know that either. I had only just discovered Rowan, so I was preoccupied.

  “He told me he left a box for you. It might be stretching things, but I wondered if whoever torched his house did it to destroy that box.”

  “In our world, things are rarely a stretch.” Damn it. I need to find out who handled his legal affairs and ask them why no one made contact with me. If it was important enough, maybe he left the box with his lawyer.

  “I don’t have any proof,” Pillow says, entering the ramp that leads to the highway. “But word on the street is The Outfit took him out for something he had done years ago.”

  “That makes no sense,” I say. “Unless they only became aware of his actions recently.”

  “All I know is he lived every day in fear. I asked him about it once, a few years later. I asked him why he was living in fear instead of confronting it head-on because that was the kind of man he was. He told me it wasn’t just about him. That he needed to stay alive to ensure you never came back to Chicago.”

  All the blood drains from my face, and I feel every pair of eyes on me. “This was about me?”

  “Let’s just say I don’t think it’s a coincidence you returned to Chicago when you did.”

  “You think someone killed him to lure me back?” I ask, continuing his train of thought.

  He shrugs, peering at me through the mirror. “I could be wrong, and I have nothing to back it up, but I don’t believe in coincidences.”

  “Neither do I.” I’ve known for some time that something is fishy. That things weren’t adding up. But I would never have put Terry in the middle of it. If he was killed because of something he did to protect me, then I owe it to him, as much as myself and my family, to get to the bottom of this.

  I’m fucked if anyone else is going to die on my watch.

  47

  BEN

  “Tell me this is some sick joke,” Sierra says. She is dressed in silk pajamas, wearing a line in the carpet as she paces back and forth in our bedroom.

  “I wish I could.” I pull on sweatpants and a plain white T-shirt. We only got home a little over an hour ago, and Rowan was already asleep. After eating the pasta Natalia heated up for us, we grabbed a quick shower together. I thought Sierra would be too tired to talk or to fuck, but she pounced on me in the shower, and I screwed her against the wall, needing to feel our connection after the day from hell.

  Then I sat her down and told her everything I know about her family and their connections to The Outfit.

  She stops pacing, sinking to her knees on the floor. “I’m shocked, but there’s another part of me that isn’t,” she admits. “I’ve always known my father was an evil piece of shit, so finding out he’s laundering money for the mafia and that his hands are dirty, most likely bloody too, isn’t that big of a surprise.”

  I sit cross-legged in front of her, taking her hands in mine. “Did you have any inkling?”

  She shakes her head, sending waves of damp hair tumbling over her shoulders. “I grew up knowing my father was a very wealthy businessman. Bodyguards and drivers were the norm. I didn’t stop to question it even if I thought some of the men he introduced me to at parties and balls were shady motherfuckers. Father never discussed business in front of me, and neither of my sisters ever said anything.” Pain slashes across her face, and her eyes well up. “Why wouldn’t my mom or Serena tell me any of this? That’s the part that has shocked me the most.”

  “I can only surmise your father dictated they keep it a secret.”

  Tears roll down her face, and my heart hurts for her. I gather her onto my lap, snaking my arms around her. “Don’t cry, Firefly. They don’t deserve your tears.”

  “It hurts, Ben,” she croaks, rubbing a hand across her chest. “Everything I thought I knew was a lie. I thought I could trust Mom and Serena, but they have lied to me for years. How could they do that to me? Why would they do that? Is my value so little to my family that they would keep this from me?”

  “I don’t know, baby.” I press a hard kiss to her temple. “I wanted to get to the full truth so I could explain it all to you, but I didn’t want to keep this a secret any longer. You deserve answers.”

  “Thank you for telling me.” She swipes at her tears and stands. “And I do need answers. I feel like such a fool. Everyone in Glencoe must be laughing at me.”

  I stand, reeling her into my arms. “It’s not common knowledge what your father does. To most, he is the legitimate businessman he appears to be.”

  “But Serena and Saskia are married to powerful mafia men! Surely people know who Alfredo is?” She spits out his real name as her fury surges to the surface.

  “Again, only those who mix in those circles would be aware of Gifoli’s position. It’s not like we go broadcasting it. And if others, outside our circles, suspect, they know better than to talk about it. Especially to Gifoli’s sister-in-law.”

  “At least I know why Felix was targeted now. It didn’t make sense before, but it does now.”

  “It’s not unusual to target important heirs, and he must’ve gotten sloppy to let them catch him in an unguarded moment in public.”

  Her eyes pop wide. “So much makes sense now,” she murmurs, tapping her fingers off her bottom lip. “Neither of my sisters are in love with their husbands, and it’s no wonder when they were both clearly in arranged marriages.” Air expels from her mouth. “At least, I dodged that bullet.”

  “I think you getting pregnant with Rowan saved you from that fate.”

  She shrugs. “My father hates me. I doubt he would have married me off anyway.”

  I tuck her damp hair behind her ears. “Baby, that wouldn’t have come into it. Your father is a cold disloyal prick. If he had found a way to forg
e a connection through you, he would have taken it. I’m sure of it.”

  “Then I guess I have something else to thank you for.” She stands on her tiptoes to press a fleeting kiss to my mouth. “But I’m done second-guessing things. I need to hear the truth. I’m calling Serena,” she says, shucking out of my arms. “I’d prefer to have the conversation face to face, but wild horses couldn’t drag me back to Chicago after today. If I never step foot in the place again, I’d die happy.”

  I know she doesn’t really mean that. She loves her little house and has made tons of happy memories there with Rowan, but I understand where she is coming from.

  I retreat to my study to call Phillip while Sierra calls her sister. “I need you to prioritize the Lawson case,” I tell him when he picks up on the third ring. “And I need you to do something else for me.” I explain about Terry, his supposed affiliation with The Outfit, the suspicion over his death, and the fact he apparently bequeathed his house and some mystery box to me. “Both things are urgent. I need intel ASAP.”

  “I will work around the clock, Mr. Mazzone, I promise.”

  I make a mental note to double Phillip’s annual bonus. The guy never tells me no. He mustn’t have much of a life because he willingly drops everything when I need him. Or he’s just that good of an employee he makes the sacrifice without question. “Thank you, Phillip. Good night.”

  I hang up, walking to our private living room to pour us some drinks while I wait for Sierra to finish talking to her sister and her mom.

  “I’ve changed my mind about the wedding,” she says, a few minutes later, storming into the room. My heart falters in my chest, and I’m not sure what expression she sees on my face, but it’s enough to have her rushing to reassure me. “I still want to marry you,” she blurts, coming around the couch. “But I don’t want my family there. I just want it to be us, Rowan, Angelo and Natalia, Leo and Alesso, and Esme and Pen.” Snatching her glass of wine, she drains half of it in one go.