Twilight Dreams
Page 18
* * *
Holly spent a week feeling sorry for herself. She had lost a job she loved. She had lost a man she might have loved. She drowned her sorrows in hot fudge sundaes with double whipped cream, and cookies-and-cream lattes. When she wasn’t wallowing in self-pity, she buried herself in housework and yard work.
When the allotted week was up, she went online and filled out job applications and resumes until she couldn’t see straight.
Thanks to a downturn in the economy, no one was hiring.
Friday night, determined not to sink into a swamp of self-pity again, she showered, did her hair and her nails, dressed in a pair of black slacks and a silky white shirt, and went to a nightclub where one of her favorite bands happened to be playing.
She had hoped listening to music she loved and being surrounded by people having a good time would somehow boost her morale. An hour later, she felt more depressed than ever.
“Another good idea shot to hell,” Holly muttered, slipping into her coat. She seemed to be the only person in the crowd without a friend at her side or a date in her arms.
Why had she left Micah? she wondered, threading her way through the crowd toward the door. So, he was a vampire. So, he drank blood. At least he made her feel beautiful, desired. Happy. If she sent him a mental invitation, would he hear her? Would he answer?
The thought had no sooner crossed her mind than he was there, striding toward her. Had he always been that handsome, his hair that dark a brown, his eyes so mesmerizing? Just looking at him took her breath away. Tall, dark, devilishly sexy. He cut through the throng of people on the dance floor like a hot knife through butter, his gaze focused on her, oblivious to the number of women who turned to stare longingly at him as he passed by.
“Holly.”
Just hearing her name on his lips made her heart skip a beat.
“You heard me.” She couldn’t stop looking at him. Just being close to him made her feel as if she had been sleepwalking through life since they’d parted.
“Did you think I wouldn’t?” His gaze caressed her, so intense it was almost tangible.
“I didn’t know. Micah . . .”
“Yes, love?”
“I just . . . I . . .”
“I know.” He smiled down at her, his arms gently circling her waist, drawing her body close to his as he lowered his head to claim her lips.
This was what she wanted, she thought. What she had been missing. What she needed. Just Micah.
“I missed you, too. Are you ready to go?” he asked, taking her hand in his.
She nodded. She didn’t care where they went, as long as they were together, as long as he would fold her into his embrace when they got there and kiss her again.
Outside, he wrapped his arms around her. “Hold on tight.”
Holly closed her eyes. When she opened them again, they were in Shirley’s house in Morgan Creek.
Micah set her on her feet. Moments later, a fire crackled in the hearth; soft music came from the speakers. A bottle of wine and two glasses waited for them on the coffee table, along with a plate of crackers and cheese.
Holly looked at Micah, her brow furrowed as she removed her coat. “When did you do all this?”
“I made a quick trip to the store when I heard you thinking about me, just in case you called for me.” Taking her hand, he led her to the sofa. “How have you been, Holly?”
“Don’t you know?”
He shook his head. “I blocked you from my thoughts for a while, hoping it would help me forget you. It didn’t work. I started to call you a dozen times, but Saintcrow told me to give you some space, so . . .” He shook his head again. “If you hadn’t called me tonight, I would have come to you. I need you in my life, sunshine.”
“Oh, Micah.” She leaned into him, lifting her head for his kiss. Right or wrong, she wanted him. Tonight or for always, she wanted him.
“Holly!”
He swept her into his arms, his mouth exploring hers in a searing kiss she felt all the way to her toes. It burned away every doubt even as it ignited her desire. He eased her back onto the sofa, his body tight against hers, his hand stroking up and down her side, lightly skimming her breast, cupping her buttocks to draw her closer.
She moaned softly when his tongue laved her neck, clutched his shoulders at the touch of his fangs.
“Holly?”
She nodded, then sighed when she felt the prick of his fangs. His bite heightened every sensation.
She wanted him desperately, felt bereft when he lifted his head.
“Tell me what you want.”
“You,” she whispered. “Now.”
“Are you sure?”
Of course she was sure. Wasn’t she? She gazed up at him, torn. There was only one thing more intimate than letting him drink her blood. Was she ready to cross that line?
As always, he knew what she was thinking. “It’s okay, sunshine,” he said, his voice thick. “When we make love, I don’t want you to have any doubts.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be.” Taking it slow was the smart thing to do. She was young, innocent in many ways. When he took her, he didn’t want her to have any regrets.
* * *
Later, wrapped in Micah’s arms, Holly felt guilty. She hadn’t meant to lead him on. She had been so certain making love was what she wanted. And yet, when it came right down to it, she had hesitated. Frowning, she stared at the flames, absently noting that the wood burned but was never consumed. She didn’t really have anything to feel guilty about, she told herself. It was a woman’s right to change her mind. And until she knew him better, until there was some kind of commitment between them, she wasn’t risking her heart. And once she gave Micah her body, her heart would surely follow.
Remembering, too late, that he could read her mind, she bit down on her lower lip. Maybe he hadn’t been listening.
She looked up at him, and frowned, thinking he looked far away. “Micah?”
“What?”
“Are you mad at me?”
“Of course not. Why would you think that?”
“No reason, except you seem so distant.”
“Sorry. I was thinking about my sister. Sofia. She wants to be a vampire.”
“What?”
“Yeah. She’s been fascinated with vampires since she was a little girl. It’s bizarre. When she found out I was one, she asked me to turn her.” He shook his head. “After what happened to my folks, you’d think being a vampire would be the last thing she’d want. I told her we’d talk about it when she’s older, but I’m afraid she won’t wait.”
“Is it that easy to just go out and find a vampire? And suppose she finds one . . . ?” Holly grimaced at the thought of his pretty little sister turning into a predator roaming the night in search of blood.
“I don’t even want to go there.” He raked his fingers through his hair. “I think I’d better sit her down and have another talk, explain to her about being sired and what it means before she does something stupid.”
“What does it mean?”
“It’s like the blood bond you and I share, only it’s stronger, more compelling. Only death can break it.”
“That’s kinda scary.”
A muscle twitched in his jaw. “It can be. Especially if you’re turned by someone you don’t like.”
“Is there really no way to undo it once you’re turned?”
“If there was, believe me, I’d have tried it a long time ago.”
Holly rested her cheek against his chest, content to be in his arms. She tried to imagine what her life would be like if she stayed with him. She would go to work while he slept, but they would spend their nights together. She tried to imagine living with a man who could only share half her life. There would be no summer days at the beach. No picnics in the park on the Fourth of July, but at night they could watch the fireworks together. No Christmas mornings with his parents or hers, but they could spend Christmas Eve with family.
What about kids? Somehow, she doubted children would be possible.
Holly sighed, then murmured, “Where do we go from here?”
“I guess that’s up to you.”
She had contemplated what it would be like to stay with Micah. Now, she tried to imagine her life without him, but it didn’t bear thinking about. The past week had proven, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that she wanted—needed—him in her life.
“Before you make a decision, you should know that I can’t father a child.”
Holly nodded. Hadn’t she guessed as much?
“Is that a deal breaker?” he asked. “I know kids are important to most women.”
Holly started to say there was always adoption, but then she paused. What kind of life would that be for a child, having a father who was a vampire? A father who would never be able to attend school functions unless they were held after dark? Who would never be able to play ball with his son in the park, or spend summer vacations at the mountains or the beach or go to the zoo?
“So, what’s it to be?” he asked quietly.
“Lots of couples can’t have kids, and they manage to live happily ever after. And there are already plenty of kids in your family,” she added, smiling. But she couldn’t ignore a little pang of regret that she would never have a baby of her own.
“I will love you as long as you live,” Micah said, his arm tightening around her.
As long as you live. Holly repeated the words in her mind. How long would that be? Another fifty years? Sixty? Seventy, if she was lucky. When she was old and wrinkled, he would still look twenty. She recalled asking Kadie if she had wanted to be a vampire, and Kadie’s answer—sooner or later, I’m sure I would have asked him to turn me because it was really the only way for the two of us to stay together.
Holly closed her eyes. If she stayed with Micah, sooner or later, she would have to make that same decision. “There’s just one thing,” she said slowly. “If we decide to stay together, will you marry me?”
Chapter Twenty-Four
“You want to marry me?” Micah asked. “Seriously?”
Holly nodded. “I’m not comfortable having a long-time affair. I want a real relationship, something solid, with a future. I guess I’m old-fashioned, but I want a piece of paper that proves I’m yours and you’re mine.”
“Fine by me,” he said, smiling down at her. “Tomorrow too soon?”
“I don’t want to rush into marriage, either. I want to make sure that what I feel, what we have, is real. We haven’t really had a chance to try living together under normal circumstances. Now that Braga is no longer a threat, and your parents know what you are . . .” She shrugged. “I want us to spend time together, like ordinary people.” With anyone else, she wouldn’t have suggested moving in together, but these weren’t normal circumstances. Micah was a vampire, and she wanted to know what living with one was really like before making any lasting commitment.
“Ordinary,” Micah repeated, chuckling. “All right, sunshine. I’m game if you are. Where do we start?”
Holly swallowed as his gaze met hers. He was so beautiful, and she wanted him so desperately....
No more than I want you.
His words went through her like lightning.
“Make love to me, Micah,” she murmured.
He arched one brow. “You sure this time?”
She nodded, too nervous to speak.
“Holly!” Wrapping his arms around her waist, he drew her down on top of him. Their clothes disappeared as if by magic as he murmured love words in her ear. She reveled in the touch of his bare skin against her, shivered with pleasure when he kissed her, his hands lightly stroking her back, delving into her hair. His tongue played over her lower lip before slipping inside.
Heat shot through her at his touch. Why had she waited so long for this? Her hands were impatient as they explored the broad expanse of his chest, the width of his shoulders, his hard, flat belly.
His kisses grew hotter, deeper, until she was afraid she might go up in flames.
With a low growl, he rolled over, carrying her with him, so that he was on top. When he gazed into her eyes, the most remarkable thing happened. She knew what he was thinking, feeling. Knew he loved her, as she loved him. Knew this was right. She sighed as he kissed her again, his body now a part of hers, carrying her away to places she had never imagined.
She was his now, she thought, really his, and there was no going back.
* * *
“Micah?”
“Hmm?”
“Where are we going to live?”
He brushed a kiss across her cheek. “I haven’t thought that far ahead. Any preference?”
“Well, I don’t have any income these days. Do you?”
“Not really.”
She nodded. “Then it seems to me we only have two options—we can stay at my place or here, in Morgan Creek. You don’t want to stay here, do you?”
Micah shrugged. “Saintcrow and Kadie are here. I know you’re not crazy about him, but they’re the only friends I’ve got.”
Holly considered that a minute. She had friends at home, but maybe it was best to stay here, at least for the time being. “I need to find a job. Is there a town nearby?”
“Yeah, about twenty miles away.”
Holly chewed on her thumbnail. Twenty miles wasn’t that far. And staying in Morgan Creek might be best while they sorted out their relationship. If they lived here and it didn’t work out, it would be much simpler for her to leave Morgan Creek and go home than to ask Micah to move out of her house. “I need to go back to my place and pick up some of my clothes and things, stop the mail delivery, and ask my neighbor’s son to water the yard again.”
“No problem. So, are we staying?”
“Yes,” she said, smiling. “For now.”
* * *
Saintcrow propped his elbows on the porch rail of Shirley’s house, his chin resting on his folded hands “So, you’re going to be here for a while?”
Micah nodded. “Yeah. If it’s all right with you.”
“I don’t have a problem with it. How’d you talk Holly into staying? I was pretty sure she’d be eager to go back home.”
“I thought so, too, but . . .” Micah made a vague gesture with his hand. “She lost her job so we decided to stay here until she figures out what she wants to do next. Oh . . . she asked me to marry her if we decide to stay together.”
“No shit?”
“Yeah, but first we’re going to play house and see how that works out.”
Saintcrow snorted softly. “Good luck with that.”
“You think we’ll need it?”
“A little luck couldn’t hurt. Marriage isn’t easy under the best of circumstances.”
“And ours aren’t the best. I get it.” Micah paced the length of the porch, back and forth, then sat on the top step. “What would you have done if Kadie hadn’t become a vampire?”
“I would have stayed with her as long as she lived. Kadie’s the best thing that ever happened to me. She made me remember my humanity. All the people we kept here have her to thank for their freedom.”
Micah nodded. “If something happened to her, do you think you’d ever fall in love again?”
“No.”
“How can you be so sure?”
“I lived a long time before I met Kadie. Maybe too long. I’ve got no interest in going on without her.”
“So, what are you saying? That you’d destroy yourself?”
“Yeah. But don’t tell her that. She wouldn’t like it.”
Micah stared into the distance for several minutes, thinking about what Saintcrow had said. He hadn’t lived nearly as long as his friend. Maybe he never would. But whether he lived another year or a thousand, he wanted Holly at his side. Another few minutes slid into eternity before he said, “Did I tell you my sister wants to be a vampire?”
Chuckling, Saintcrow dropped down beside him. “What brought that on?”
“She’s always been into vampires. Funny ones, scary ones, it doesn’t matter. She thinks it would be fun. Fun!” He shook his head in exasperation. “The woman I love doesn’t want to be a vampire, but my little sister does. I get the feeling that fate’s having a good laugh at my expense.”
Rising, Saintcrow slapped him on the shoulder. “I think you’re right.”
* * *
Holly sorted through the piles of clothing on her bed, trying to decide what to keep and what to donate to the local homeless shelter. Moving in with Micah was the perfect excuse to clean out her closet and get rid of skirts, sweaters, shoes, and jeans that she hadn’t worn in years.
Earlier, she had filled a box with a few of her favorite books and movies to take to Morgan Creek.
Holly folded one last sweater and dropped it into her suitcase, then went to the dresser and began sorting through her underwear. Spending a month or so in Morgan Creek had seemed like a good idea when she and Micah had discussed it. Now, she couldn’t help wondering if she was doing the right thing. She had to work. She had to pay for the upkeep on her house, taxes, groceries. When she got a job, she wouldn’t be able to keep Micah’s hours. No staying up until three or four in the morning, not when she’d have to get up early and drive twenty miles to work. Assuming she could find a job. And then there was her house. She didn’t want to sell it. She supposed she could rent it....
Looking up, she frowned at her reflection in the oval mirror above the dresser. “Stop it. He loves you. You love him. No relationship is perfect. Every couple has problems to work out. So, Micah is a vampire. It could be worse,” she muttered under her breath, then bit down on her lower lip when she saw him standing in the doorway.
“Yeah?” He lifted one brow. “What do you consider worse?”
“Someone who squeezes the toothpaste from the middle?”
Micah frowned. And then he laughed. Taking Holly in his arms, he kissed the top of her head, thinking that, as long as they could laugh together, everything would be all right.
“Are you about done here?” he asked.
“Yes, except for my toiletries.”
It didn’t take long to pack her toothpaste and toothbrush and cosmetics. She took a last look around to make sure she had everything she thought she might need. She had put a hold on her mail, asked Josh to water the yard and keep an eye on things until she returned.